Episode 867 - The Real Rival in Leadership: You

0:04 Helping leaders motivate their people to a higher level of performance through strong human relations, team building, and goal achieving. This is the 7-Minute Leadership Podcast with your host, Paul Falafelito. Hello, everyone, and welcome to the 7-Minute Leadership Podcast. It's episode 867. I want you to think about the person you compare yourself to. You probably have one. Maybe it's another leader in your organization. Maybe it's somebody in your industry. Maybe it's the person who keeps getting promoted. Maybe it's somebody on social media who seems to be more successful, more confident, making more money, getting more attention, or accomplishing things faster than you are. And every once in a while, you

0:57 look over at them and think, I need to catch that person. I think you're racing the wrong person. The real rival in leadership isn't the person standing next to you. It's you. More specifically, it's the version of you that woke up yesterday morning. That's your competition. And if you want to become a better leader, stop worrying so much about whether you're ahead of everybody else. Start asking one question.

1:27 Am I ahead of who I was yesterday? Because That's a race you can actually win. I've been teaching leadership for years, and one of the things I've learned is that comparison can completely distort your perception of progress. You see somebody doing better than you, and suddenly everything you've accomplished doesn't feel good enough. You see somebody get promoted, and you question your career. You see somebody build a successful business, and suddenly yours feels small. You see another leader commanding a room and you start questioning your own ability.

2:05 But you don't know their timeline. You don't know their circumstances. You don't know what opportunities they had. You don't know what advantages they started with. You don't know what mistakes they made behind the scenes. And you certainly don't know what they sacrificed to get where they are. So why are you using their scoreboard to measure your life? You have to use your own. Leadership growth is personal. The leader you were five years ago should have trouble keeping up with the leader you are today. The leader you were last year should look at you today and say, wow, we've learned a lot. And yesterday's version of you should lose by a little bit. Every single day, not by some massive amount. You don't need to reinvent yourself every morning.

2:56 You need to beat yesterday by inches. Maybe yesterday you avoided a difficult conversation. Today you have it. Yesterday you walked past a problem because you didn't feel like dealing with it. Today you stop and handle it. Yesterday you got defensive when somebody challenged your decision. Today you listened before responding. Maybe yesterday you spent an hour complaining about something you couldn't control. Today you spend that hour fixing something you can control. You... win. And that's leadership growth.

3:32 And there's something powerful about competing against yourself. You remove the excuses because when your competition is another person, you can always explain away the difference. They had better opportunities. They know the right people. They have more resources. Their company is bigger. Their team is better. They've been doing it longer. Fine. None of that matters when the competition is you. Did you prepare better today? Did you communicate better today? Did you handle pressure better today? Did you make a better decision today? Did you show more discipline today?

4:09 Did you leave your team better than you found them today? That's a scoreboard worth paying attention to. And I want you to notice something. Most of those things aren't measured by your job title. They're measured by your behavior. That matters because leadership development can become incredibly complicated if we allow it to. There are books everywhere, courses everywhere, conferences, certifications, leadership models, assessments, corporate buzzwords. Everybody has a new system for becoming a better leader. Meanwhile, sometimes the best leadership development program in the world is looking in the mirror tonight and asking, was I better today? That question gets uncomfortable pretty quickly because some days the answer is going

4:59 to be no. There will be days when yesterday's version of you wins. You lose your temper. You procrastinate. You avoid the conversation. You make the lazy decision. You don't prepare. You say something you wish you could take back. You allow something to slide that you know should have been addressed.

5:17 That all happens. The mistake is allowing one bad day to become your new standard. Tomorrow morning, the scoreboard resets and you get another shot. That's one of the things I love about leadership. You can make a bad decision at 2 o'clock this afternoon and learn from it by 2.05. Growth doesn't require permission. Nobody has to promote you first.

5:43 Nobody has to give you a title. Nobody has to enroll you in a leadership program. You can decide today that tomorrow's version of you is going to be better. And this idea becomes even more powerful when you stop measuring improvement only through big accomplishments. We have a tendency to celebrate the big stuff, the promotion, the degree, the certification, the big contract, the award, the record-breaking year. Those are all great. But leadership is usually built somewhere much smaller.

6:19 It's built when you show up prepared when nobody would have noticed if you didn't. It's built when you keep your word. It's built when you admit you were wrong. It's built when you stay disciplined on a Tuesday afternoon when nobody is watching. That's where you start separating yourself from yesterday's version of you. And after enough days, something interesting happens. Those tiny wins compound. Think about this. If you become slightly better at handling difficult conversations... slightly better at making decisions under pressure, slightly better at listening to your people, slightly better at managing your time, and slightly better at holding yourself accountable, you may barely notice the

7:06 difference tomorrow. But give that process a year. Now you have a totally different leader. And this is where I want to challenge you. Stop asking whether you're the best leader in the room. That question remains. feeds your ego. Ask whether you're becoming the best leader you're capable of becoming.

7:28 That question feeds your growth because eventually being better than everybody around you can become dangerous. Maybe you are the strongest leader on your team. Great. Now what? Do you coast? Do you lower your standards? Do you decide you've arrived? You can be the best leader in the That's why your real competition has to remain internal. Your standard keeps moving.

7:58 Every time you improve, you create a stronger opponent for tomorrow. I love that idea. Think about it. You wake up tomorrow and today's version of you is waiting. You have to beat them. Then tomorrow becomes the new standard. Beat that version the next day and keep going. That's a competition that never ends. There's no trophy. There's no finish line.

8:20 There's no moment where somebody walks into your office and says, congratulations, you have officially completed leadership. It doesn't happen. Leadership requires constant work. And if you've listened to this podcast for any length of time, you know I believe leadership growth happens through consistent, intentional moments. Seven focused minutes can change how you think, how you make decisions, and how you show up for your people. That's what this entire podcast has always been about. Seven minutes, one idea, one adjustment, one opportunity to walk away a little better than you were before you hit play. You've heard me talk about daily routines, accountability, mindset, self-awareness, getting out of your own way,

9:09 and becoming 1% better. Those are Ideas have appeared throughout the history of this podcast because leadership growth is never a single event. It's repetition. It's deciding that yesterday established the baseline, not the ceiling. So tomorrow morning, I want you to try something. Forget everybody else for a minute.

9:32 Forget LinkedIn. Forget social media. Forget the person down the hall. Forget the competitor across town. Look at your own scoreboard. Who were you yesterday? Where did you hesitate? Where did you fall short? What did you do well and what can you improve? And then go beat that person, not by a mile, just by an inch. And when tomorrow becomes yesterday, do it again because the most dangerous leap in your industry probably isn't the person who's obsessed with beating everybody else it's the person who quietly wakes up every morning determined to beat themselves day after day year after year imagine competing against somebody like that now imagine becoming them. So, your real rival has your name. They

10:30 know every excuse you make, every shortcut you take, and every place where you're capable of more. You don't need to beat everybody. You just have to beat yesterday. And then wake up tomorrow and do it again. And eventually... Everyone else will wonder how you got so far ahead. This has been the 7-Minute Leadership Podcast, and I thank you for listening. For more Paul Falavelito podcasts, visit paulfalavelito.com.