What Happens When You Live by the Spirit, Not the Flesh - #161 Alicia Wilson

0:00 So I just lay there lightly close my eyes and at the foot of the bed I saw a bright light. It was 2 clasp hands like this. A man in the middle with a white robe over his head and two white doves out of the light came and said to me, Matthew 516. I was like what? So I flew up out of the bed ran to the living room and I was like mom, mom, mom, mom I need a Bible. We found the Bible.

0:26 I opened it up went to Matthew 516. Bet you I had no idea what this verse said when I opened it up. It says let your light so shine before men. Let me see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven. And I was like, what is dad trying to say to me? And then the voice said to me, how were you letting your light shine in that moment? And rather than feeling like disappointed or that I let him down.

0:51 I felt love. I felt love in that moment that he wants me to be a light for him and that those people that I was dancing with didn't know who he was. But I, I have experienced him and I know him. And I said to my mom, I said from this day forward, no one can tell me that the Bible is not real. For Alicia Wilson, encountering God didn't just strengthen her faith, it changed how she understood who she is and what it actually means to live in relationship with God.

1:26 Those encounters LED her into a way of living she describes as learning to live as Spirit, not driven by fear, circumstances, or even our own understanding, but by daily surrender to God's guidance. It's an identity outline throughout Scripture, but one that many people never fully realize. Today, Alicia shares what happens as she committed her life to God, not only in her words but in her heart, and how that decision reshaped the way she experienced guidance, peace, suffering, and even her own sense of self. As you listen, consider what her story reveals about what it looks like to truly walk with God, not at a distance, but in daily surrender and relationship. Please meet Alicia Wilson.

2:27 Alicia Wilson, you sent a video in where you described how you have experienced God in instances in your life after you made a commitment to Him. And it fit with what we do. And so we schedule a call it we always do. That's how it works. People submit a video on our website if we feel like it's a good fit and we pray into it and God discernment and all that stuff, we'll schedule a call.

2:52 So we scheduled a call. We had the call and I left the call. I left that call a different person that I got on the call after speaking to you and hearing how you walk with God. And I told our team, I'm like, I'm just ready to have her here. So you are here. You also are an accomplished soccer player and coach.

3:27 You played on. Correct me if I'm wrong. And it's not that we're going to bring all this stuff up. The Jamaican women's national team, is that right? And you're also an accomplished collegiate soccer coach. Now I looked, I looked at your records, by the way, so they're impressive. I'm not a soccer player.

3:50 I'm a bit of an athlete. I played other sports, but we won't be doing anything athletic here. I can tell you after seeing what you come from, but that's not why you're here. We're going to get into some really cool stuff today. But first of all, welcome Alicia. Thank you for having me, it's a pleasure. People sit in that chair because they have experienced God or are experiencing God.

4:19 Have you experienced God? I had nothing. I was very poor. I used to wear my brother's clothes, didn't have food, like, you know, you didn't have access to certain things. And I was like hearing about this God and that God helps and he does things and stuff and, and I was like, I made-up my mind.

4:38 I was like, I have nothing to lose because I have nothing. So me giving my life over to God and well, let's prove it. Let's, let's see. So I was daring and I literally was like that like as a kid, like if I'm into something like I'm going to shoot full, full force into it. So I was like, let's see. So did you just say a prayer?

5:01 Yes, I prayed, I prayed, I prayed and I said if there's a God out there, I said, you know, I said I don't have anything to lose. And I said, I'm going to give you my eyes of this day going forward. I'm going to give you my life. I'm going to put my life in your hands. That's exactly what I said.

5:16 So what did that look like? That just looked like my heart, my me pouring out my heart and say here, if you're real, if you're there, then here. Just words, but they were coming from my heart. So after you did that, how did your life change? So my life changed by me joining like a church group in my community.

5:42 So they had a youth group and I used to go there and we'll sing in the choir, sing a little bit and stuff like that. And I remember when it was time for me to graduate high school and I said, I said, I prayed again. And I said, Lord, most of the people that I know in my community, when they graduate high school, they go find a job and then their life and, or they have children in their life.

6:07 And based on the, the environment that I grew up in, and I say, I don't want that. I don't want that for myself. So I decided to write a letter to a known business person near where I live. And I took the the letter to the secretary and I gave it to her, expressing honesty, truth, everything that I was dealing with.

6:34 I saw growing up, I was 5, five brothers. I was the only girl. So you know how that is. I was rough, right? I grew up tough. So after the CEO of the company read the letter, he called me in and he said that he wanted to see me. So I went in and I remember standing in his office and he said to me, I only have one son and I've always wanted a daughter. And so as this day going forward, I will pay all your school fees.

7:11 I'm going to cover all your books. I'm going to open a bank account and I'm going to put some funds in there for you monthly and everything. I'm going to pay your fees, everything that you want, I'll do that. And so at the time, I got into a Sports College in Jamaica that was in Saint Catherine.

7:31 And that was kind of the first sign of really seeing because that don't happen often, especially where I'm from. And, you know, sometimes you have established business people who feel like they can take advantage of, especially I'm a young woman, They would probably use that as a way to exploit them, if you understand what I mean.

7:50 And it was never that ever. And he, he stood by his word. I got into, I got accepted into the the college and he paid my fees. I got uniform, I got books and every month I got funds in my account. And so while I was at that sport college, I started doing various different sport disciplines. I did track and field, I did field hockey, I did basketball, I did volleyball, I did netball.

8:17 And then I started playing soccer even more. And the soccer U23 team, they decided to come to the college for training camp. And I used to go and play with the boys in the evening after school at the college. And the boys, they went up to the head coach at the time. And they were like, hey, coach, you know, we have a female player. She's she's not bad.

8:36 She's, you know, you need to take a look at her. And so he called me into the camp, said, yeah, since we're camping here, she can join. So I went in and join and they had like 33 people at the camp and at the end of the camp I was in, they were going to cut and, you know, bring it down to 23. And at the end of the camp I was in the 23.

8:58 And so after that I started working a little harder trying to, you know, get my passes together and stuff. And then the, the next camp was a senior camp that I was called to. And then I will, you know, based on how I prepared myself when I went in, I was named captain of the team. What team? The Jamaica national team. You were captain of the.

9:19 Jamaica the second time I went into camp, yes. So those camps you're talking about are for the Jamaica national team, yes. They're just not a college. Camp, they're not just a college camp, they're a national team camps, so that those are like series of events that you can see that it's not normal. Yeah, that's some a naturalist would say. That's some very good fortune to find yourself in those places. And it took a lot of boldness to write that letter to this CEO. And what a strong woman this is, to go and make her way like she has made it.

10:01 How would you? How do you see it? I honestly believe when anyone who sincerely speak to the Lord and ask Him to come into their heart and in their their lives, He does that. And it's not from the words that you speak, but from your heart. And when He comes in, I honestly believe that the spirits start to give you a little guidance and as you follow them, it leads and guide you into paths that He wants for you. Gurture teaches us that how much more will he give the Holy Spirit or good gifts to those who ask him. I experienced that as well.

10:47 The Christian culture begins to have red flags popping up in their concern against this prosperity gospel that people talk about of, oh, if you give your life to Jesus, then you know you will live a life of prosperity, including good fortune, like the things that you've had and wealth and and other things like that. How do you see that as far as the way God blesses people who are seeking Him and obedient to Him versus what cultural Christianity often classifieds as prosperity? I think there's a big misconception on who God is. I don't think people really know who God is. And the Scripture tells us who is. It says God is a spirit.

11:43 That's the first thing. And they that worship him must worship him in spirit and in truth. And so once we know who God is and that he's a spirit, and then we start to understand who we are because he sent his Son Jesus, Jesus went home, send the Holy Spirit that he come, come live in us. So once the Spirit is in US, God is a spirit. We communicate with God spirit to spirit. That's the first thing.

12:13 The second thing is when we start to live on this earth and we start to look at prosperity. What is prosperity? What is it for what it what, what's the, the end result just to prosper? How does physical things benefit God if God is a spirit? So I think there's a big misconception with God being a spirit and the carnal things we associate with those things. And so when we truly start understanding who God is and understand who we are, the carnal, the flesh, the physical things, the prosperity thing has no value. And so once we understand God, we understand who we are, then all those other things don't matter because then we start to understand that God is not a God of he's not concerned with all those are as a result.

13:10 And he says that if you as a father who know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more him. So I honestly believe and trust that if God knows that I need something, He'll make the provision. But it's not a concern of mine. And I can say that based on my whole life experience, because my life experience wasn't to gain things or to be prosperous or rich.

13:36 I just decided to give my life to Him and let him, and I was able to see what he did with it. What caused you to write that letter to that CEO? I believe it was spirit LED. I honestly do because normally, you know, when I was at home, obviously I told you that I didn't grow up in a good environment. So normally when there's chaos in the house, I used to climb up, go on top of my house and sit there. And I used to look out to the ocean because I live really, really close to the ocean.

14:07 And that's where I used to sit and just think about all type of things. And then, you know, thoughts would come into your head and things would come in. And I honestly believe now I know what it is. But the Holy Spirit and God, they talk to us. He talks to us all the time. He talks to us all the time.

14:27 But sometimes what I have learned now in my journey, right now, I know how to hear. I know how to hear Him when He speaks to me. Yeah, we've got to get into that. That's good. And you know, Jesus tells us John 1010 in the latter half of that verse, first half, we always hear the thief comes to kill, steal and destroy. I come that you may have life and life more abundant. He he he's he's come for us to have an abundant life. He wants us to have good things.

15:07 He does. Spiritually. Spiritually. That doesn't mean you can't have good things in this world as well. I think he wants to bless us. 100%. And I, I, I think people get too cautious of the prosperity gospel and, and refuse God's gifts sometimes and blessings that include earthly prosperity because I think it is giving you earthly prosperity. I think personally in my view of that, he's saying, OK, will you be faithful over little?

15:40 What you going to do with what I give you, right to him who is faithful over Little? First of all, more is required of him, but secondly, he's going to be given more. I'll give you these kingdoms in heaven because you've been faithful over little. I'll set you over much spiritually. Spiritually and and I could tell you he gave me a revelation on that.

16:05 Yeah. And it changed my whole life, changed my whole perspective. This is what he said. He says I'm God, right? I say, yes, Lord. All right. Yes, dad. I called him dad because he's personal to me. He said, You're my child, right? I say yes, dad. He says, do you know what? I own what belongs to me, the dad, the whole world. He said, what?

16:38 Who owns all the money in the world or who owns everything? I say you dad. So he said, if you're my child, do you own it too? I say, yeah. So he said, why are you trying to get what belongs to you? I said, wow, if you need it, I'll make it available. So don't go around trying to get all these things because if it already belonged to you, your spirit, you're not your flesh, your spirit. I came and placed my spirit on the inside of you when you accept my son.

17:11 So whatever belongs to me belongs to you. So now you're not after anything because you know it belongs to you. Whenever you need it, it's at your disposal. You'll I'll make it available to you because I know your intentions are not to have all these things. It's a hard posture in those situations. It is.

17:29 That's really, really good, Alicia. And I think there's a conversation to be had around living a life in deep connection and rich connection with God that is a life of abundance and what the secular world classifieds as abundance. And I think when we hold the position that we cannot have worldly abundance and and be walking closely with God, I think that's a mistake.

18:07 I think he will give us that as we prove faithful over what he has given us, knowing that our intention is to build the Kingdom with it from a spiritual perspective, not to accumulate from a personal wealth perspective. So I just, there's, there's a place in there that there's a whole conversation is not really where we're intending to get to here. But I, you know, I, I do think about that. You, you say you made a commitment to you gave your life to God.

18:38 I did. You're like, if you're real, I'm giving my life to you. What do I have to lose? Right? Nothing. I'm not sure that's the ideal heart posture. Maybe it is an ideal heart posture. It's like, Hey, look, I, I'm, you know, we'll see, right? We'll see, and I can't. Tell you how many people have sat in that chair that have it's like, if you, if you really are real, then I, you know, we'll see.

19:01 And our human mind says, if that were me as a parent, I would smack that kid. You know, it's like, you know, and every time, every time I've had a conversation with somebody who has said that the response from God to that was love. Yeah, he is love. Yeah, your love. It wasn't our response. It was a, it was a, a supernatural response of love, which doesn't compute in a lot of damn parenting philosophies on on the earth here.

19:40 And so I, I don't think he's offended or challenged or anything by someone who is actually seeking him, speaking to him like you did and saying, I want to know, I'm going to give myself to you. We'll see. And I think he said excellent. That's always his response, you know? Come with me. Yes, I have things for you, Alicia.

20:04 Hallelujah. And it and it LED you into a life of abundance. It, it did. I mean, take a look at where you are now versus where you knew you were going at 17. If you did what people do in that environment, you chose something different. You leaned on him to do it, and he provided. So here you are, captain of the Jamaican national team.

20:36 Tell me how it goes from there. So there was a College in Mississippi and they reached, they had some male soccer players from Jamaica at the college. And the head coach was also over the women's team. And he reached out to the coach of the Jamaica team and he said, hey, we're looking for two players.

20:59 Do you have any available? And right there and then the coach came over and spoke to me and said, hey, there's a coach in Mississippi that is asking for players, and you're the one that I'm wanting to recommend. And from there, it was history. Like, applied everything, you know, and receive a full soccer scholarship to come and play here in Mississippi.

21:25 Yeah. So you continued your college career on scholarship. Now you're in the United States. That's amazing. So, so in all of this, what is at that time in that season, what is your walk with God like then? I mean, you've committed yourself. Are you recognizing this as God just guiding this whole thing? Or are you thinking, man, I'm really putting the work in and getting rewarded for my work?

21:54 So at the time when I was at the college, I remember saying a prayer to Dad and I said, if you help me to get to the United States, like I will serve you for the rest of my life. And when I got to the United States, you know, obviously I had teammates and stuff like that. And, you know, there were times that they wanted to go out and, you know, go party and stuff. And I would go and, you know, after a while being there with them, I would go stand in the corner because Dad is talking to me.

22:29 And he said, you know, you're not supposed to be here. And so I'll go stand in the corner and wait till they're ready. And then we head back to campus. Are you talking to him on a daily basis? I mean, you're, you're talking about now being out with everybody else that's partying in in your spirit, God's talking to you and you separate yourself.

22:50 So as a college student, that's typically not the response when you're in a sort of a party atmosphere. It's just like, let's go have fun. Correct. Unless you are really richly connected to God. So as a college student, what did daily walking with God look like? Are you in scripture every day? Are you?

23:13 No, I wasn't in scripture because, as I said, I, I, I never like was fully in the church, like grew up in the church, not like my mother and my father were in church or go, you know. So I did went on my own right when I was telling you like at 17, I did went on my own and I wasn't in Scripture. But I, I did know when he spoke to me because it was very heavy on my heart.

23:44 It was tugging on my heart and I could not do otherwise other than what I was instructed. Can you describe that? Like he's saying, you're not supposed to be here and I knew it was from him. Yeah, I know that. I know, I know, I know the the devil is not going to tell me that I'm not supposed to be. Yeah, you, you know, when you're not supposed to be in a, in a place, there's a, there's a conviction that happens. That's what, yeah.

24:08 You got a choice to make. You have a choice to make. I think there's a scripture that says I placed before you life and death. And then if you don't know what to choose, choose life. So we do have a choice. We do have a choice. Yeah. And as a college student, college kid, heck even an adult for that matter, we choose the thing that's going to give us often the most pleasure at the time.

24:34 And, and in those moments, we're we're we're choosing disobedience to God. We're, we're choosing misalignment with God in the Kingdom, and we're choosing alignment with the enemy of God in his Kingdom. That's what's happening in those decisions where we say I want, I want the right now, despite the check in my spirit about what it's going to the effect it will have on me in the future.

25:10 I know. That's true. What I'm choosing and maybe I can get away with it. I mean, we, we, we, we know. Everybody knows that decision. Yes, yes. Everybody listening to this right now is like, yo, I know exactly. So when we do that, here's why that's not a small deal. And this is something I'm understanding more in it and just kind of diving into more. When we do that, we are coming into agreement with the enemy of God and what he has intended for this world. We are coming out of agreement with God. So when we look at those small decisions like that, it's not just a no.

26:03 It'll be OK. That's the deception. We are choosing to align ourselves with the enemy of God. When we choose to align ourselves with the enemy of God, we are opening the door for the enemy of God and his angels to have access to us. Now we're starting to talk about demonic oppression and all those kinds of things.

26:28 That's how the doors are opened. 100% so. What we're talking about is sin, right? That is a sin. So we really want to understand what sin is. It's choosing to come out of agreement and alignment with God and choosing to come into agreement and alignment with the with Satan. Let's call him who he is. When we think of it that way, when we get those little choices, I think we should take those a little more seriously. I honestly believe that I.

26:55 Think we got to pay attention to that it's not the innocent thing that we're making it out to be that we've told ourselves and our that the enemy has told us in our heads that it is that's not a big. Deal. Now what's that going to hurt? You'll get you'll, you'll get right back to church just. One night, yeah.

27:10 It's not going to hurt anything. Yeah, right. Yeah. You don't have to be very many steps off the path to be off the path. That's true. So is that how you lived your life in college, consistently making that dis choice to stay in alignment with God? Yeah, because I, I can't say I go to church every Sunday, you know, when I was in college.

27:34 But there were mornings that I woke up and he was, I would hear the voice like you need to go to church today. And I remember there was this Jamaican lady near where my school was and she invited me to church and I was like, hey, how am I going to get there? Because, you know, I don't have a car. And she's like, oh, I can tell the bus to come and pick you up. And I remember 1 morning I was going to church and I woke up and I was just, I don't know how to describe it, but my whole body was just very, I don't know if anybody has been filled with the Holy Spirit and they know what that felt like. It's like shock waves going through your whole body. And I was like, I don't like, I knew when it happened. Like I'd like either I'm filled

28:28 with the anointing or something else is going on. I didn't really understand, but I knew it was something divine that was taking place. So I wasn't scared. And when the bus came to pick me up that morning, I went on the bus, still still shaking, got into the church, sits through the message, still shaking. And the Holy Spirit said to me, you need to go up and share how you got here.

28:53 I didn't ask why I didn't care why I was being very obedient. And I spoke to one of the ladies there and say, hey, can I go and share my testimony? And she made it happen because it was in a Baptist Church. And I know normally probably in a Baptist Church, they don't allow that. And she did allow me to do it. And I went up and I spoke from the day that I got saved and how my journey went until the day I got to that college. And after I shared all of that story and I went and sat back down, all come, it went away.

29:33 The. The the, the electric stuff that was going through my body like. You felt that before you walked into the church. Yes, it was from I woke up, got on the bus, drove all the way to the church, got off the bus, got into the church, sat down. It's still going on and until I walked up and spoke and share my testimony and went back down and sat, it left me. What do you think happened there? I was being obedient and after I did my job when. You think that feeling was when you woke up that morning, did you have?

30:10 Were you anticipating something that day? Is there some reason? No, I wasn't anticipating anything. I mean, like even today, you know, you know that today's coming, you know that you're going to sit at this table and we're going to do this. And so there's a thing that happens. I it happens. I've done this 160 some odd times and it doesn't matter 24 hours or more before that.

30:34 I feel this already. It's on my mind, it's on my heart. I, I, I, my routine changes. It's in preparation for this thing, right? Was any of that happening for you when you got up that would cause this physiological change in you that morning? No, not that I can remember. You don't. You didn't think you were going to go to tell your testimony at this church? No, no, they didn't plan on it, didn't talk about it, thought about it.

31:03 No, no. Well, one of the things that I do is I explore all the possibilities of what you're you're sharing that could be the natural world without it being the Holy Spirit coming over you. I I 100% believe that. And that's something that's never happened to me before that day. It's never happened and and I don't even think it's happened to me ever again since that day.

31:33 That same feeling. That same complete from head to toe. From head to toe, you felt like a like an electric charge. And I was just and I couldn't stop it. Were you vibrating? I was. Were you? Yeah, for real. I was and I couldn't stop it. I couldn't stop it. I couldn't stop it. It's not like I had control over it.

31:55 I don't. I didn't drink coffee. No, I don't drink coffee, don't drink soda, anything crazy like that because, you know, I normally, as an athlete, drink water, eat properly. Yeah. But yeah, it was it was years later that Dad revealed to me that I was being filled with the Holy Spirit. Is that right? Yeah.

32:17 Because back then I didn't have, I wasn't speaking in tongues or anything. Had you asked to be filled with the Holy Spirit? Back then. Before you got that? So that's really cool to me. And I have heard other people, one recently it was Emily Watson didn't ask for it and it hit her in the middle of the night.

32:42 That is so interesting. You think, OK, God says, how much more will I give the Holy Spirit to those who ask, why do you think that happened that day? I it's purpose, I this is what I believe. I know that God, it says, I, I think I told you this earlier. Men look at the outward appearance, but God sees the heart. And when you have a heart for God, he knows, it says he knew us before we were forming our mother's womb. And so God knows us more than we know ourselves, and He sees our heart, that we have a heart for Him, even though we don't believe or think that we have a heart for Him. He knows it because He made us.

33:29 So what you're saying is you had a heart posture toward God that you didn't even realize that you had in that moment, and he responded to it with an anointing of the Holy Spirit. 100%, yeah. And immediately you found yourself in front of people speaking. Yes. About what he's done in your life. And I believe that probably even from that moment, you know, before I used to be shy.

34:03 But since then, like I haven't been afraid anytime, anytime it comes to anything about Dad or you know, his son Jesus, I'll go and speak with no issues, no problem, no problem, not nervous, not worry about what I need to say or not say. Because I did place the scripture in my heart about don't try to think about what you're going to say before you say. I will put the things in your mouth, and you will say what I ask you to say.

34:34 That wasn't the main experience that hit me in your video, but man, that is really powerful. And I think there's some really interesting spiritual insights that have come out of, of that bit of the discussion about baptism of the Holy Spirit. I mean, we, we, we talk about seeking other believers who are walking closely and the laying on of hands and all of that is absolutely true 100%. But this notion of heart posture, even even though you don't recognize it in yourself, I don't know, I think that's something to search out.

35:13 I think that's something to explore in our own, in our own walk that is, that is really cool. So, so did anything come with that? Did did you just speak the things that God told you to speak and life just kind of carried on the same or did something else change? You say you had this new confidence from that point out. How, what, how did you, how did you change after this encounter with the Holy Spirit?

35:37 I. Probably didn't notice any big change after that encounter. Carried on for another one to two years because after I finished my College in Mississippi, I went and played for a semi professional team in Asheville, NC. And then I went to the, you know, a university in Florida to start my master's.

36:09 And then while I was there, I got an opportunity to go play in Iceland. Iceland. Yes, and this is an amazing encounter because when I went to Iceland, I do I remember when I went to a they have a lot of spa in Iceland, you know and these are like heating spa like because it's cold air. So you have like whirlpools with heat and stuff. And then when I went there, I met this lady. She was from Africa.

36:43 And so I started talking to her and, you know, she told me that her and her husband came from Africa and came there, but her husband left her and went off and it's just her. I was like, my heart sank for her. I was like, wow. And I heard the Lord spoke to me and he says tell her that Jesus loves her.

37:05 And I was not obedient. I was kind of like timid to tell her that. And so I left the spa and I was walking back to my apartment. It was heavy on my heart. I felt really bad about it because I wasn't obedient. And I left Iceland and I came back and all that. That whole year it was on my spirit and I was felt horrible about it. And I was allowed to go back to Iceland the following year. And I was like, Lord, please, if you let me see that woman again, I'm, I promise I'm going to let her know. And you know what happened?

37:49 I was passing a bread shop in Reykjavik and I saw the lady in a bread shop because and the reason why I can say that is because in Iceland at the time was in 2000 and five, 2006, you don't really have a lot of Africans in Iceland. They're very pure nation. And I remember her, but I don't think she remembered me. I ran into that bread shop and nothing was going to stand in my way.

38:18 And I was like, hi, hello. Hey. I just wanted to let you know Jesus really loves you. Oh, I was like, I was like, I felt so free. I was like, thank you, Jesus. And the likelihood of that happening is very limited. And I and I share that sometimes, you know, and let people know that God is so amazing. He allowed me to because maybe, you know, I would have had that on my heart for years to come, not being obedient and doing what He has asked me to do.

38:53 And He allowed that opportunity to come and I didn't. I didn't hesitate. I ran like there was no tomorrow and I made sure I delivered the message to her. That is amazing when that happens. I have had that happen before where I said, Lord, do the impossible and bring this person that I missed a window with back to me and he's done it. I, I've had that experience happened where it took my breath away when I saw them.

39:32 Like the chances of that happening are so low. I mean, you you leave the country and you you come back a year later asking for him to bring her to you. Yeah. What was that feeling like? I mean that that just. It was it's and the thing that that that the word of God says, he says when you experience me, it's not for it's for you to prove God for yourself.

40:08 And so it it allows you to grow in your trusting of him and your walk and your relationship with him. And when you've seen him time and again come through and do these things, that's the experience that you have. And so. You shouldn't have any doubt in your heart. You should not because he's proven himself time and again. What?

40:27 What did the lady say I mean. She didn't Remember Me. Yeah, what did she say when she. Was just looking at. Jesus loves you. She was just looking at me. She just looked at me. Did she say? She didn't say a word. She she did not say this. Crazy lady doing coming up to me like that. But I was so happy, yeah. And then I just went back into my car and I and I left. Yeah, well, so God works in incredible ways. He does.

40:52 And for you, I think that was clearly him saying I want you to be obedient to me, Alicia, I'm going to give you another chance and you and you did. And but for her, right, who knows what has happened in her life. She may have encountered all these other things and in being a just a complete time of despair and and you hit her with something like that and then she speech.

41:20 She's like, I cannot believe I have asked God if you're real. Show me today, right? Who knows? Who knows? And and that's the thing, like I know for us as human, we want to know what ifs and the other things that follow. And I'm not. I'm at the point where it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. It was a test of your obedience.

41:40 Yes, and it doesn't matter. And it was, it was way more than that. And what you will never know is what the way more is with what we do right here. It it gives us we we actually it's it's incredible. People often write in and and tell us the fruit that God produces through this. And I know it's just a fraction, but to watch it reverberate into all kinds of places is a really is a really powerful thing. That's an amazing story of conviction or obedience and God giving a second chance.

42:17 It is so. So what happened from there? So from there, so that happened in 2006, 2007 so 2006 the first time I saw the lady, 2007 I went back. 2008 I moved to Costa Rica because my husband is Costa Rican and so when I came back from Iceland. I'll be honest with you, that would be more of my climate. My speed is Costa Rica versus I know Iceland's beautiful and and that sort of thing.

42:41 Anyway, sidebar, go ahead. Yeah. So we moved to Costa Rica and then had my daughter in 2008 because obviously I was waiting for a professional, you know, league to come back because every time we had a professional women's league in the US, it would fold. And so I was like, I'm not going to sit around and wait for a professional league. So I was like, I'm going to go ahead and start my life. So, so I was married in 2006.

43:09 So even while I was travelling, my husband, he would come with me and stuff like that. So 2008 we moved to Costa Rica, had my daughter. And so about a few months after having my daughter, I wanted to go back and get back into plane. And so I joined this team in San Jose, Costa Rica, and so went down there, trained with the team, and after the training, they made a circle. And so they were clapping, you know, clapping and dancing. And, you know, I like to dance.

43:39 And so I went into the middle and I was dancing and everybody was like, hey, hey, hey, you know. But once I finish, I didn't feel good about myself. Let me tell you that. I didn't feel good in my spirit. Like I did that, but I couldn't put my finger on it. Like, why? That makes sense because I'm like, yes, you're supposed to get with your team.

43:57 You're supposed to build a bond. You're supposed to, you know, have a camaraderie and stuff like that. And so I went home. When I went home, took a shower because my mom had my I had my daughter. She was about, you know, a few months. And so after I took a shower, right before I go and get and get her from my mom, I said let me just lay in the bed for a few minutes going to, you know, come, you know, relax until I go get her from her. And so while I was laying in the bed, just halfway foot up, 1 foot on now completely I know I wasn't sleeping. I was not sleeping.

44:37 So I just lay there lightly close my eyes and not the foot of the bed. I saw a bright light, the bright light that came there. It was 2 clasp hands like this, a man in the middle with a white robe over his head and two white doves. All of this is in. All at this in the same. Time. In the same time, in the light all at one time, and the boys out of the light came and said to me, Matthew 516.

45:16 I was like, what? So I flew up out of the bed, ran to the living room and I was like, mom, mom, mom, mom, I need a Bible. I really need a Bible. And so I we found the Bible. I opened it up, went to Matthew 516. Bet you I had no idea what this verse said. And when I opened it up, it says, let your light so shine before men that they may know your good works and glorify your Father in heaven, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.

45:52 And I was like, at that point I started to think and I was like, what? What is Dad trying to say to me? And then the voice said to me, how were you letting your light shine in that moment? And rather than feeling like disappointed or that I let him down, I felt love. I felt love in that moment that he wants me to be a light for him and that those people that I was dancing with didn't know who he was. But I, I have experienced him and I know him. And me doing that was not glorifying him in any way. My light wasn't shining in that moment. And I said to my mom, I said from this day forward, no one can tell me that the Bible is not real. I did not know that scripture and I got it specific Matthew 516.

47:02 And when I went and read it, it lined up with what I was experiencing and what happened. OK. It's how you got it that I'm pretty interested in here, right? Because you can get a thought in your head, which is God lots of times breaking in and you feel like you can see a scripture. I get that, but that's not what you're describing. You're it sounds to me like you're describing a thing that occurred in your room versus, and correct me if I'm wrong, like a dream or a vision.

47:41 Was this like a a vision that was all happening in your mind, or was this displaying and opening up physically in your room? It's hard to describe because laying there, not thinking about like per SE God or anything, and laying there and then that light pop up at the end of the bed and three in one. Are you kidding me?

48:09 You know the dove represents the Holy Spirit, the Son, and then the Father. Yeah, but there's this light at the end of the bed. If someone else had walked into the room, do you think they would have seen this light or was this just something that was in your mind? I honestly, I don't know if they would have seen it because even I think there was a story in the Bible with Saul, Paul and Damascus, when the stuff was happening to him, the people around him, they really couldn't hear the voice that he was hearing and things was happening.

48:45 So I can't say. They heard something They. Heard, but they couldn't make out audio in your eyes. So I really don't know if you know if somebody was in the room, if they would have seen or heard it. I I don't. Know do you think they would have seen it? I don't know. 'Cause like I've had, we've had people on here.

49:02 Josh Smallwood, for instance, he looked out his car window when he got in his garage in this time and he said, Stacy, a screen popped up over here and I saw Jesus standing over me in a scene from a few years back. I said, Josh, is that something that you're rejecting your mind or do you think of your wife had walked in that garage, she might have seen it.

49:26 He said, I checked the cameras to see if it showed up on there. I I saw that with my eyes. I didn't see it in my mind. It was right over there. And so I'm wondering how that was. I had, we had someone on years ago. Kim Marsh talks about being in her room and the the ceiling opened and it wasn't a vision.

49:59 She said it was 3 dimensional. He came through. I, I saw this. This wasn't a dream or a vision. And I'm wondering if you had to put it in a bucket. Is this a, a thing in your imagination? A vision? Because we get things in our head. I get, I'll lay down or I'll, I'll sit in a chair and just close my eyes for a bit and I, I will see things, many things, disjointed things, a person's face that I've never seen before.

50:29 I see things all the time in my mind's eye. I'm trying to, I'm trying to figure out or trying to ask, do you think this was in your mind's eye or do you think this opened up in front of you in that room like Mary? Yeah. Angel came, showed up. I mean, I don't think that was in her mind's eye, no.

50:51 I think. I think dude was right there in the room with her, you know what I'm saying? And she was terrified. What about you? This work is fueled by people responding when God prompts them to give. And if God is using these conversations in your life and you sense Him inviting you to be a part of that, you can partner with us by becoming a donor at a stronger faith.org/give. Every gift makes it possible for more stories like this to reach the people who need them.

51:24 What about you? I can because it's funny, because as I'm sitting here thinking about that and then thinking about my future experiences that I've had after that, I honestly believe that he showed up in that very moment and spoke to me. In your room, yeah. Visibly. You saw that with your eyes and not your mind's eye. When you heard the scripture, did you hear it audibly with your ears?

51:47 Was that in your spirit? Audibly. You heard that through your ears. Yep. And I got up and I read. I was like I need a Bible. What did it sound like? Normal Matthew 516. The voice sounded normal. Yeah, didn't echo, didn't sound harsh or mad. It was just plain calm. Calm. And it was just Matthew 516. And in this light, you saw folded hands. Like a prayer like this. 2 doves. 2 white doves. And a man.

52:29 In the middle, he was in the middle. What did he look like? Just a man with a rope with a thing over his head. I couldn't see his face. Couldn't see his face? No. What color is the rope? White. Did he have anything on it, Sash? Nothing pure white and light. It might have been there, but you couldn't have seen it because of the brightness, no.

52:51 Everything is formed out within the light, like everything is quite distinct. I'm so interested in the details of these these encounters. I love it when people have these things and I always try to ask and find some detail in there that that that gives us a further glimpse into the Kingdom of heaven. To be honest, I think most of those experiences are indescribable because it's after you experience it, you try to find words to describe it because sometimes there's not words to describe it.

53:31 You can't describe it. Yeah, I've, I'll tell you, I've mentioned it many times on here when I've had conversations with people who have had encounters or near death experiences where they believed they were in some environment, heavenly environment. They they've often have said it's like trying to describe a multi dimensional occurrence, like 678 dimensions with 3D language.

53:58 You can't. People talk about the color. I ask about color and there's like, well, I don't know how to describe this, but there were colors that I've never seen on earth and it it was like they were alive. And I'm like, I don't know. I can't even, I don't even know what that. Means you know. It's like, I don't know what that means, right?

54:20 Give me something and they're like, I'm sorry, this is the best I can do. Which also gets me excited about heaven, right? Because what is in store for us? We we are in this box of three dimensions mostly here. And what's that going to be like? But anyway, super fascinated by that. And you know, people are like, hey, don't get too much in the details of the experience. Talk about what came from the experience, right? And So what came from that experience was an awakening of God's desire for you to be set apart. Yes, to be holy.

54:57 I I I believe that 100%. It wasn't that dancing was a sin in that situation. He said let your light shine and it's not for your glory, it's for mine. So what did that do? Do you? Well, it did allow me to realize that God will show up to his people and that he'll speak to us in ways that he'll get through to us. And we know that it's it's not of anything or any, any doing, but he chose like it's his choice. And it's again I come back to the heart conditions of the heart and him seeing that without you knowing that he knows that you'll have a heart after him. You ever had anything like that happened since? Yes.

56:00 You have, so we talk about experiencing God. I mean, you've had a couple of things that have been tangible experiences as you have walked in deep connection with him, which apparently is only deepening here that I mean, having a Holy Spirit baptism that looked like yours did, if that's how you classify it now, maybe an anointing that happened back then is one thing. Now you're this is a this is like another level of engagement I've never had.

56:32 I've never had an encounter that my ears and eyes were players in the thing, right? And that's OK and that's fine, but that seems like a new level of faith. I don't know, that's a new level of faith or God just deciding to break in. How do you see that? So the Word of God says that we are going to be changed into His very image, the image of His dear Son from glory to glory.

57:01 And as the aim for God is once you accept his Son and the Spirit comes and live on on the inside of you, he wants us to be more and more like his Son Jesus. And so as we live and grow, he's, he's taking us from one glory to the next, meaning that he's revealing his very image in you to get to the to, to, to open up what he really is or who you are in his glory. I don't know.

57:32 I'm trying to express express it the best way I know how. And So what he's shown me is, is that as you start to experience God, there's more, there's so much more. He says there's higher heights and deeper depths to him, like you can't bottom out or you can't top out God. And the, the only way to experience that and not limit him is to see yourself as the Spirit of God.

58:10 And that's what I've realized that I've start to see myself as the spirit and I'm now able to see in the spirit I can hear. And now I can I, I, he's leading me along the path where I can walk as a spirit. And I know that's probably sound foreign, but. Now, when did this awakening? So this awakening happened during COVID.

58:38 We started a small Bible group with my brother and some other members from all over the world, Costa Rica, some in Jamaica, some here in the US, some in Trinidad, all over, and about 10 people. We come together and we're like, we really want to know what the word of God says. And so we start to look into what God says about who we are.

59:02 So first we start to pull apart the mystery. It's like the scripture talk about the mystery and the mystery is Christ in you the hope of glory and we start to pull it up. I says who's joined to the Lord is 1 spirit. And so that's where I am spirit come from and I started, I started to take ownership of that, of who I am. And it says the Spirit knows all things. And so I start to renew my mind in who the the Lord says I am. And once I start to renew my mind, I start to my thinking, change my belief, my my whole being has to go with what God is saying.

59:45 OK, so describe life like that and so. While we're having those meetings during COVID, we went from every day to like three days a week and we were just in the word. We're just in the word. We're just in the word. And in 2021, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. And I remember going to the clinic after I did the mammogram and it was this Chinese guy, and he looked cold as day. And he handed me the disc with the results. And I remember looking at him and smiling. And he his eyes went wide open because he's probably never seen somebody smiling in the face of this disastrous news. And in my heart, I was like, Dad, this is me and you. I want to see where you take me and what you do in this. And took the disc, you know,

1:00:55 went home, shared the news with my family, hadn't shared it with anyone else. And I wasn't sad or anything because in my heart I was like, dad, this is an opportunity for me to really get to know who you are. And I promise you, I heard the voice said to me, you are not your body. And it just kept going on and on. You're not your body, you're not your body. You're not your body.

1:01:29 You are the spirit. You're not your body. The Spirit of God lives on the inside of you. You're not your body. And so throughout my whole journey, that's what I told myself. So obviously going to the Cancer Center, you know, going through chemo, walking in full of life, smiling, building up people, speaking to the nurses, letting them know who they are in Christ because we were in the words. So I felt amazing through and I can share that throughout my whole journey, not one day I've ever felt sad or taught pity on myself because I was built up in who I was and I was exercising this very thing in the moment of that crisis. And so this is what I'm going to tell you. While at home, I had to spend

1:02:31 time with dad alone. And he said to me, you see how you're at home? There's no I know your husband love you, your mom love you, your kids love you, people love you, but it's you and me alone, He said. You've had your job and you thought that you couldn't be away from your job. Now your job is carrying on and you're here alone with me. Your job is going on.

1:03:00 Everything else is continuing to happen, but you're here with me. So now he said no longer are you going to look like your job need you, people need you because after you're gone, things are going to carry on. However it needs to get fixed or carry on. It's going to carry on. But he say it's me and you and I remember he gave me a revelation on communion and communion. You take it by faith and what he spoke to me, it was, I believe it's in John 6 around 50 something 53 around 59 where he says if you don't eat my flesh and drink my blood, you have no life within you.

1:03:48 That's a revelation that he revealed to me. And what what I did, I started to take communion every day and in my room I would talk to him constantly like I'm talking to you here. And as I talked to him, I begin to hear him. But how he talks back to you, most of the time he'll talk back to you with his word, Scripture, Scripture, yes, right. And I remember one day I went out the back of my house and I was sitting there and I said, Lord, well, here I am at the point where I'm going to let go of everything. I'm already I'm, I'm, I'm at the point where if, if this is your time for me to come home, I'm coming home. And he, I hear the voice said to me, why are my children afraid of dying?

1:04:48 I said, what? So yeah, why are my children afraid of dying? And I said, Lord, what do you mean? He said, did I not say in my word that the dead in Christ shall rise 1st and those who are alive and remain shall be caught up? He says you don't want to see me first and I busted out laughing. I was set free. I busted out laughing and in that instant I was set free. I don't worry about dying anymore because he's given me hope of should you die, you're going to be one of the first ones to see me because my word remains. And so throughout my entire journey, that set me free from how I was thinking a few years earlier, He, he, he because I always thought of my children.

1:05:49 And a few years before that, I had an encounter with him. I was up one night, you know, at my apartment when we were in Texas, and I heard the voice said to me, Are you ready to come home? This was before I got sick, says, Are you ready to come home? And I was like, what? Where's that coming from?

1:06:11 And I was there for a while just trying to process this thing, like, Are you ready to come home? And I was like, what? And after sitting there for a while, I said, but what about my children? And he said to me, you think you take care of them? What? Yeah. I said, yeah, do you think you take care of them?

1:06:32 Do you protect them? They go to school, they go all over the place and you're not there with them. He says, I do, I protect them. And I said, OK, Lord, from that day forward, I took my hands off my children. Like, I don't stress. I don't worry. I don't worry. First, their safety or anything, because I was told I was instructed that I needed.

1:06:59 I did. I didn't protect them, he did. And so when I got diagnosed, that was never a problem for me because I took what he told me and put it in my heart and I believed it. And so I was able to let go of my children. So which got diagnosed? Were you healed? Well, I'm going to tell you what happened. So, so I did chemo and then I did radiation because they were trying to shrink the the tumor and it got to the point where it didn't completely removed it.

1:07:42 So I had to do surgery. And so I did surgery. The first surgery, well, that was the second one. The first one was to put the, the thing that I got medicine through second surgery was to do the double mastectomy. And then the third surgery I did was at the end after I did all that was to do like a reconstruction.

1:08:07 So what I, what they did was to take the muscle from my stomach and to use it to, you know, construct, reconstruct. And in that last surgery, when I got out of the operating room, I was in recovery. Jesus appeared to me. He was to my right, floating in the corner, and I've never felt more alive than I was in that moment.

1:08:50 He started to wax me. He got some golden wax and he started to wax me from the crown of my head all the way to my feet. What do you mean? Like, you know, like a blowtorch. A blowtorch. OK, It was almost in that fashion, like. So what, what, what? Wax. Golden wax. He was waxing me. Like covering me?

1:09:16 So covering you. With golden wax, that's what I can describe it as. Not oil, but wax. Was golden wax. He started to wax some other people who was next to me. I couldn't make them out, but he stopped here and I said, Lord, why did you stop there? Because you do it did the entire my entire body. Why did you stop there? And he said to me, he says people are trying to understand me from a head knowledge, but they need to understand me with their heart.

1:09:54 That's exactly what he said to me. And while I was laying there, the doctor came in. There is a nurse that came in. My husband was standing at the bed to my left and I was addressing the nurse. I said to her, I say I'm healed. This was just immediately after coming out, so you know, you probably would be under under anesthesia, but I was more alive than I just I'm telling you.

1:10:25 And I said to her, I'm healed. I said Jesus heals me. I said, don't look at what you're seeing. I said I'm healed and I said, do you believe? And she said, yes, if I see that Lady today, I couldn't tell you who she was she, but I remember her saying, yes, I believe. And then I had the presence of mind and I said to my husband, I said, you need to record this because I was about to start speaking. He took his phone out.

1:10:58 I don't know why he'd obeyed in that moment, because you know, some people be like, oh, you're under anesthesia. You just come out of the recovery room. What are you doing? He he recorded it and I have it on recording. And as I laid there, I started to speak. I said I'm quick, I'm sharp. I start to describe what I was feeling and I said the more that I like when I close my eyes like I can see and and I talk about the carnal and the spirit and I was just I was just speaking in the Holy Spirit and I said I am complete.

1:11:51 Jesus told me I was complete. He said I have made you whole and when I got out of the hospital, I shared it with my brother and he told me to go over into James. James one think around 3 that says that after you go through it that you become complete needing nothing. And I believe that that journey and that experience that I've had and throughout all that that I went through that God is telling me that I'm complete. Like I, I got to the point where I gave up everything. I gave up everything and just was locked into what and who he is.

1:12:55 So you had this, this other vision with Jesus in the corner of the room. Was that under medication, under thing? I mean, what, what did you see there? Was that also in the room or was this a vision? He he was in the room. He was in the room he was in. You were laying in the hospital bed in recovery. In recovery.

1:13:18 So this wasn't anesthesia induced? No. I mean, were you? Because I've had surgeries before and I didn't come out like that. I was, I've had surgeries before and you know, under honesty. Remember I told you I had two surges before that one and that third one? I was more alive than I've ever been in my entire life.

1:13:39 Because I felt that instantly. Instantly, I, I was and, and, and I remember like a couple months after the surgery, I could remember vividly. I was sitting at this parking lot and I started to cry. I was taking over and I was like, I am, I've become so sharp and quick. And I was tell talking to my brother.

1:14:06 I remember I was on the phone and he's like, what do you mean? I said my spirit is quick. He said, what do you mean? And I said, I'm sharp. He's like, what do you mean? I said, I am able. So if you walk into the room and you start to talk, I can immediately identify who you are by the words that come out of your mouth.

1:14:26 What do you mean? If you start talking about a lot of carnal things and earthly things, or if you start speaking about the spirit and speaking about the word of God and how he's been in your life and stuff, I can tell those are the two. Those are the only two. You're either carnal or your spirit.

1:14:44 You're either flesh or your spirit. And so I became quick so I now can identify my ear in His sharp. My spirit is sharp and quick to where the Lord has allowed me to identify things in real time. How is that different than what you were before? I would hear things and not know what they are and I would just go along with it. So if I'm, if I'm meeting somebody and talking with them, I would relate to them and what they're sharing. Does that make sense?

1:15:19 So if they're talking about carnal things, I'll be talking about carnal things with them things. Yeah, we're talking. About We're talking about money, we're talking about my job A. New salsa that's at the store. Exactly. I didn't start to describe the salsa with them, but something changed and now I now I now was able to identify spiritual things and I was able to identify carnal things. And if you go over to Romans 8, it says those who are of the flesh minded things of the flesh, those who have the spirit minded things of the spirit, there is a spiritual world and there's a carnal world.

1:16:04 And we are, and I want people to know this, that we are spirit and God want us to live and dwell and walk in the spiritual realm. And if you find it says to be carnally minded is death, but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. And God was able to help me identify spiritual things and carnal things.

1:16:31 He's saying the the carnal things are temporary, they're going to pass away and they're going to die. Scripture says that and the spiritual things are eternal. And so he wants us to stay spiritual, to stay on the spiritual side because it's producing fruit. It's it's doing things even what you can see and what you can't see, the visible and the invisible, like the spirit is producing things, but the carnal things, the world respond to a lot of things that they can physically see and that's how they respond. But in the spirit God have a there's a different world. And so that had this happens a few few months ago, I was fellowshipping with my brother and the Lord said to me, I'm going to do my best to express

1:17:26 this. People see faith as just believing. And I said, Lord, what do you mean? He said, he said faith is real. He said the spiritual world is real and I said, dad, how can you come? How you know explain this to me. He says, remember in the beginning I spoke and things became so there were there. I'm the real deal, like I existed before anything that we could see physically.

1:18:03 I don't know if that. Means no, I'm I'm, I'm tracking with you. I agree, yes. And so he's saying, I use hope and faith for humans because we're we, we, we like to see things, but it already existed. It's there in the spiritual, in the unseen. So he's like, they see faith as, oh, I need to believe, I need to trust. And that's my faith.

1:18:25 But he's saying, no, he said to me, it's real. It's real. And it's so powerful. I believe in the spiritual as well. It sounds to me like you had through the things that you guys did in the Bible study, some of the revelation that you got, especially in Romans 8 and, and other places where you just began to live life as spirit rather than flesh.

1:19:07 You have flesh. I mean, right here we are. Yes, yes. This, this is, this is our world, and it takes awakening to see spirit. It does. It does. Though we were spirit before we were flesh. Yes, yes. I, I want to try to get into a place where we are articulating that we are spirit and that God is spirit and that God is not up in heaven and we're down here and maybe he hears one of our prayers every now and then.

1:19:46 And if I do the right things, comes and lives in my heart. And I asked him to do that, that I'll get to go up to heaven with him when I have this death, whatever it is, which I nobody wants to do, right? If we are spirit and we know God is spirit. And God lives inside of us. There is no separation. We are one.

1:20:11 We are one and that's how he can say I will never leave you nor forsake you. I'll always be with you, even to the end of this. Right, he's not hanging out with. Us. No, he's, he's right there. He's right inside of you. Yeah. It's what? It's what cookie dough is after you put all the ingredients together, right? Yes.

1:20:29 You're not separate. You don't stay separate ingredients. You become a thing. Yes, yes. And the amazing thing is God is such a gentleman that even though the spirit live is living on the inside of us, he still give us a choice. You have the you have the heart, you have your soul, right. And when those two are being led by the Spirit, that's where we follow. We become one.

1:20:59 But sometimes the soul want to run off and, you know, take the lead and, and so if it's used to the leading of the Holy Spirit, then I honestly believe that's where we get to walk in, in the Spirit of God. So much of this revelation or awakening came for you during this time when you were battling breast cancer and Jesus came and waxed.

1:21:24 You waxed me? Yes, from the crown of my head to the sole of my feet. Yeah, well, he stopped for a while there on. Some people, yes, on some people, on others who were around, but on me went all the way down and I was asking him like, what's going on? Yes, OK, I get it now. So that that was a him saying that he does this for people, that we have to be willing for him to go all the way through our heart, not just.

1:21:48 Not through our head knowledge like a make believe. It's not a make believe. It's not magic, it's real. Yeah, it's a thing. That's a concept that we've read on paper that we subscribe to but we haven't experienced. Right. Yes, yeah. So, so I'm interested in understanding this sharpness and quickness that you're describing.

1:22:10 It sounds to me like these, this revelation that you've gotten around what it truly means, that God is spirit and that we are spirit and that we are interwoven, that we are literally 1 and how you were different after what? What does quickening and sharpness mean that's not just observing? Oh yeah, we are Spirit and He's Spirit, and so we're one. Yeah.

1:22:42 So, So what happened? Yeah. That you. Experienced after I told you that I broke down in my car because I, I had this like, whoa, it was so strong. And then after I went home, I realized when the kids or my husband or people around me start to speak, I had this like annoyance of like, what are you talking about? Like what are you?

1:23:09 That's just carnal things like, why are you minding the things like, so I, I was like, so quick to recognize. And so now I start dividing. So when people come and talk to me about Jesus, about the word of God, like my spirit, I was like receptive and everything. And then when they come and talk to me about money or food or those were carnal things.

1:23:32 So what do you do in those situations? I was very, I tried to stay quiet. I stay quiet because I didn't. If I give a response like, what am I responding to? Right. But we live in a physical world. There's carnal things, right? So I was trying to figure out in that morning, I was trying to figure out what's going on. Does that make sense?

1:24:07 Like I was trying, still trying to figure out. So I was kind of like, how, how do I handle this? Like, how do I, because yes, we live in a, a body and we have, we need these things and we have to function. And So what Dad revealed to me was that your spirit first, and because your spirit, you can operate through those medium, through your flesh, through your carnal things, because obviously you have those need. Well, so you shouldn't let the carnal lead, you shouldn't let your flesh lead you.

1:24:46 And that's, that's what I, I, I got out of that and it should never lead. Yeah, so did it. How did life change for you when you. So life change in that I begin to get a lot of revelations just trying to see that where do where do I go from here? How do you want me to operate? And so I was reading, I think Matthew 1128 and 29, and it talks about Jesus and he says if you go over to the message translation, he says watch how I do it, learn of me, learn the unforced rhythm of grace.

1:25:33 And the Lord gave me a revelation of that. He says as a spirit you're going to walk and operate a move without planning. And the unforced rhythm of grace is that in everything that you go into, the Lord will the Spirit will operate. Yeah. So it's not like I have a pre plan idea of you know exactly how I want I, I, I leave room for him to work and operate in what I have doing or saying or going on, if that makes sense.

1:26:09 I. Think of this my own life and, and when I talked about being changed after the call, it really, I really began to ponder what it really means to live a spirit instead of flesh and how can what, what does that look like practically in this life right now? And it, it very much is about that. They're the concerns of the flesh are, are obvious and, and we're drawn back to those because they're blatantly right in front of us on a daily basis. Are, are the way we feel physically, our financial situation, the circumstances with our kids and this grade thing or school.

1:26:47 I mean, all these things are, are the bills we have to pay, the fact that our car is broken down and all the other things. I mean, those are carnal, physical things right in front of us. And So what is it? What does it look like to live as spirit in the midst of a carnal world? So the first scripture I'm going to use is the one that says is not I who live, but Christ and the life that I live. I live by the fate of Jesus Christ. And so the Lord started to reveal to me that when the Holy Spirit come and live on the inside of you, you'll know you no longer live when you decide to follow Jesus, you literally giving up your all your fleshly and carnal desires or needs or wants completely.

1:27:35 That's what we should do. Yes, yes. We become Christian and say we're going to follow Jesus and, and check the box and get the baptism, but don't actually follow Jesus and actually turn our lives over to him. I I I I think that's a thing that so many people and I want to get into that. You know, what are the things that a lot of people that are missing in as it relates to truly living that way? I hear you and it's it's death to self carry your cross the whole.

1:28:06 And The thing is, I don't know that. I don't think we digest that that's. That's the difference. So, So what I want to share with you is like during that time when we were in the word, we didn't just skip over them, We meditated on them and we made them become real. We made them become alive. You know, you talk about words on the page.

1:28:27 They became alive for us. They get up and start walking and moving like they, it's, we call it the living word. The written word became the living word. And so we meditated on just one scripture and one scripture you meditate on, you can use it for the rest of your life. That's how powerful we we realize the scriptures became and one scripture that I think I shared it with you on the call that dad gave me throughout my journey as well was Romans 811 and I made that became real for me.

1:29:01 And I cannot tell you during my journey that I ever struggled or suffered. I never felt any pain. I never struggled, I never suffered. It didn't. I'm not saying I didn't go through that stuff, but my mind and my heart was on Jesus. It was on the Lord and I was trying to get as much and be, be like so close as as I could be. And it took that for me to shut down everything and shut out everything, if that makes sense.

1:29:36 Yeah, I mean, we, we become our illness so often, even if it's a cold, we never detach our spirit from our body in those situations. We race to medication, we hit the bed. We we, we do all the things to come into agreement with the carnal nature of the illness. I think, or whatever the situation we become, that we we take that on as ours. It's it, it's, it's my cold or my cancer or whatever else. It is.

1:30:15 We we we almost take it as our identity, it seems like in my experience, rather than detaching our spirit from our body. We're not identified by the body, I promise you. You are not your body. You're not your body. It's the revelation, the word that he gave. Exact words. You're not your body. And it sounds like you internalized that and said that's that's part of the mystery of the gospel. It is.

1:30:48 That's the true gospel. Isn't it? Yes. That's the true gospel. We are not these things. We are not the we are. We are spirit. So what happens if we act as spirit in the midst of carnal trial? What does that look like in our life for you? It sounds like it was a means by which you navigated breast cancer and the treatment and all the things that went around it.

1:31:18 I'm assuming you did all the everything treatment things and the surgeries and all of it, the pain and all that other stuff. All of it, but I felt like I didn't. I went through nothing because where my heart and my mind was. You were in spirit. The whole. With God rather than in agreement with. With what was taking place and, and it's fascinating because I know like there's a lot of people who have experienced God and probably even the NDE, they call it, and they, a lot of them talk about getting out of their body and looking down and seeing themselves. Like that's confirmation we're not our bodies. It is confirmation.

1:32:05 I've had a few people sit in that chair that have their, their consciousness was was sharp, was separated from their body like they saw themselves. I've seen many people that have had that where they could see themselves and, and so science says, OK, well that's just your senses gathering data from the circumstances, all of which add up to this ability to piece it together and see yourself from outside of your body.

1:32:34 I, I've had other people whose consciousness separated from their body and did not remain in proximity of their body, but were verified in other places. So they could not have gathered that information from where their body was laying at the time. And for me, that is evidence of your spirit. It's just contained in this shell, right? Now, but that's, that's what the the Word of God says, says the body is the what the temple of.

1:33:10 It's the spirit. Yeah. It's the temple of God. Yeah. So that's where the spirit live. So I just carry the spirit around. Well, it's, I don't know. There's this revelation of that that I think you've have gotten and I think that's what I got a taste of when we were on the on the phone. I know these things, just like you said, I know these things in my head.

1:33:31 I know scripture. I've read the Bible. I don't know how many times. There's so many, many times. I read it multiple times a day and have for decades now. So whatever that's worth. And, and I asked for knowledge and understanding, but there's there is revelation. There is Revelation and I get them all the time.

1:33:56 There's revelation of what it means that we are spirit and that God is spirit. That, I think could transform the way we walk through this life and put us in a place where I think God intends us to be while we are here. Yes, yes. And it is that place that I feel like he has revealed to you. You asked me some interesting questions on the call that I've never gotten asked.

1:34:32 I always say, you know, what kind of questions do you have? And it's like, OK, you know, when can I come? What time of day does this normally? You know, I get all those kinds of questions. And your questions weren't that your questions. Do you know who you are? And you set my mind in lots of places with that question you asked me also, do you know Dad man, what a question that is? And and that's all coming from a place of you being awakened to the fact that you are spirit and not flesh 1. 100%. But that you are spirit experiencing A carnal world. And what I'm hoping to do is to extract as much of that revelation in this conversation so that the person's listening to this on the other side

1:35:27 receive that same awakening, that they are not their body, and that the things that are troubling them, that are carnal or in the flesh are not eternal things. They're temporary. And we understand that it's like, OK, I get that it's temporary, but I don't want to suffer temporarily either, right?

1:35:52 You know, and, and so I, I, I, I want to navigate these things in the spirit rather than the flesh. What? What do I need to do to navigate this carnal life as spirit rather than flesh? Wow, I'm going to say that the first thing is that you have to give your heart to the Lord, your heart, not speaking words, your heart. And even if you say it and you don't mean it, he'll know and that's the first place of of God taking over and say I'm going to have my spirit.

1:36:38 That's when you're truly born again. It's when your heart said, man, I, I, I just give in 100%. Like I don't have any doubts, Any question like I, yes, you're going to have the questions, but I give you my heart. And once dad sees that, then he can work. But if you don't give up the hard part, it's not going to work. And I think people don't do that because they don't know and trust him.

1:37:03 Well, that's, that's the part, that's where faith comes in. And I'm saying faith is real. You won't ponder though, when. You begin to ponder God as infinite in his intelligence and his goodness. There's plenty of evidence for that. I'm sure people can point to things that have not been ideal in their life and say, how can a good God do this? He's infinite in his intelligence. I would say to that.

1:37:28 And I would also say that the story is not over. So don't think you've got it figured out. But when? When I just explore this idea, this, the certainty that the creator of the universe is the one who is asking me to trust him. He is so high in in his intelligence and his compassion and his love, yet so personal with me that he knows every intricate thing possible about me, things I don't even know about myself. How do I equate that?

1:38:07 It's like like the best parent that you could imagine and their three-year old saying, no, I'm going to take control because I, I, I, I don't trust you. When the parent sees and knows almost infinitely more than they know, it's like, it's it, it, it's, it's saying, wait a minute, I'm going to submit myself to you because you see everything and you know everything and you are infinite love.

1:38:44 Why wouldn't I put it in your hands? It's this relinquishing of things when you say, oh, of course, I'll give this to you. It's almost like if I were having a heart attack be sent to the hospital, I've got a four world renowned cardiologist standing there ready to save my life and me saying no, no, no, no, I got this, I got this.

1:39:21 Give me the, the, the, the, the scalpel or whatever. It's like, well, you don't actually use the scalpel for that. You do another thing. It, it would be like that, but times a million, right when we think we need to control. And so when we talk about giving our heart to him, giving our life to him, it's literally just saying I'm just a a newborn infant that doesn't know how to get food for myself. You are my mother who knows every nutrient that I need and is ready to give it to me.

1:39:56 I'm just going to go with you. That's. It. That's it. Even Scripture backs that up where Jesus said that you have to come like a little child, right? Scripture saying that. And I know I've heard a lot of people, even pastors, trying to explain that. That's literally what that means. So the first step is truly understanding what it means to give your heart to God. You know, the question I think I asked was what is it? What does it take?

1:40:24 What what do we need to do to live a carnal life as spirit? Step one, give your life to God. That's what that looks like. Give your heart to God. So continue with what we need to do to this. Have this awakening that we are spirit and live as spirit. So yeah, you give up, you give, give him your heart. And it now comes down to you knowing what he says about you. So if you don't know who you are, you can operate as who you are.

1:41:00 And so when you understand who he is, you give him your heart. The Spirit come and live on the inside of you. There's scripture that says who you are, right? He said that you're one with him. He says that you have the mind of we have the mind of Christ. There's a lot of things that he's telling you about yourself.

1:41:19 So you have to learn your new self because now you're not your old self, right? So now he's telling you who you are. He says that you have all things pertaining to life and godliness in Christ. So as you start meditating on those scriptures that tell you who you are, now you're going to meditate on them and make them become real to you. It's personal.

1:41:50 That's why it's called a personal relationship. So there is no there's no magic to it and method because it's your personal walk and personal relationship with Him. We hear that I am who you say that I am. Your songs around that. What are what are some scriptural references that point to what God says about us as to who we actually are versus who we think we are?

1:42:21 He said that we are risen with Christ. He said that we're one with him who is. Whoever is joined to the Lord is 111 Spirit. I see myself as I have power. He says. I've not given you a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind. Are we seeing ourselves like that? So there are tons of scriptures if you go. So now listen to this.

1:42:49 When you read Scripture, now you see different because no longer are you looking at it from a carnal perspective, and now it's God's language to you in the Spirit. Like Lord, what are you telling me about myself? In John 33, when Jesus says you must be born again, he says spirit is spirit and flesh is flesh.

1:43:18 So there are a lot of scriptures that elude that tells us that who we are when you're born again. So he's telling you you're born again. Now spirit is spirit, flesh is flesh. And so now when you read Scripture, you no longer see a carnal perspective. You start to see it from your true identity or true self of who you are.

1:43:40 So it's relationship in the Spirit. Your relationship with God is spirit and your spirit LED. And based on what God says about you, you can rest in that. You have confidence in what he says about you. There's so many scriptures that tell. So now when you go back and look at scripture, you're going to look at it different. And then when you make you, when you take that and make it your own.

1:44:10 And I become powerful beyond measure. And I believe that's why you have people who can heal because they've taken that and make it their own because of their relationship that they have with that. Do you realize that everybody's called differently, but yet it's for one for the Kingdom? In your own revelation and awakening, and as the Holy Spirit has touched you and Jesus has waxed you and you've gotten an an anointing, do you, do you operate in the gifts of the Spirit?

1:44:45 In Isaiah 11, two, I believe when he says that and the Spirit shall rest upon him, the Spirit of knowledge, wisdom and understanding. And so God wants all of us to be able to operate with all these gifts because it's one spirit. So he says that you have all things pertaining to life and godliness in Christ Jesus. So I know people talk about the gifts, different gifts. I believe we all have it.

1:45:22 We have all the gifts because it's one spirit, but because of your relationship with Dad, there is one maybe particular that he wants you to because somebody else is doing something else. Because imagine if all of us was for healing, Who is going to be for prophesied? Who's going to be for this? And does that make sense?

1:45:43 Yeah, well, Paul outlines, you know, the body has many parts and they all have a a role. And and so the question is, I mean, have you, do you recognize the spirits, the gifts of the spirit operating in you and which, if so, which ones do you see? Do you? Do you have the gift of discerning spirits?

1:46:02 Do you? Yes. Do you have a prophetic gift? I do, but the prophetic gift is not prophesying on people or things. Is is, is about my walk and my journey because lately he gave me a view of what he wants me to do. And he showed me in a realm. I was the the view that he gave me. I was in a realm and outside of that realm was the world. He says who?

1:46:43 If you're a lover of the world, you're no friend of gods. But he was showing me the realm and outside it shows the lust of the eye, the lust of the flesh, the pride of life, money. He shows crime and all that. And what he was showing me is like, I don't want you to let that affect you or pull you out or for you to be, I guess, connected in some way, like get distracted then by what's happening around you.

1:47:17 He says I want you to walk and I will show you hurting people. He was explaining to me how I can identify people that really are hunger hungry for him and I can speak a word in that moment of what he gives me to speak to them and they will believe. So that's what a prophetic gift looks like for you.

1:47:45 For me, yes. It's for. It's very focused. He's giving you he, he gives you helps you identify people that need to be spoken over. To receive Jesus, receive him in their hearts. And he showed me, he says people who have everything that they need, people who are comfortable in the world, they don't really have a need for him. It's going to be people who are hurting, people who are suffering, people who are dying physically. Well, I can see those, right?

1:48:21 You know and and. Well, I'm just, I'm just seeing what he's showing me. Yeah, I'm just saying when you talk about operating in gifts of the Spirit, a lot of times we we talk about having a prophetic gift. In other words, sometimes a word of knowledge will come into that. You have a need that you've had difficulty with and I'll get a, a pain in my knee that's alerting me to the fact that I need to pray over this and, and, and command healing or whatever. And there's other things.

1:48:47 There's warnings that people get in prophetic dreams and that there's like, I'm supposed to share this with you. I don't feel like this relationship is, is in a place with it that God is endorsing. So you really should pray into that. It's, it's, it's about building people up, right? The gift of prophecy.

1:49:07 And then there's the gift of discerning spirits that that helps people to identify demonic presence where they need to pray into that or even angelic presence, right? Sometimes that's actually seeing it with their eyes or smell or other ways that they sense that they're sensitive to the spiritual things. There's the gift of healing, right? But anyway, I'm just wondering if in your encounters over your anointings and other things like that, if you've noticed a heightened sense of any of the gifts of the Spirit like that other than.

1:49:46 Yeah, like I said, it's it's the what I what I shared when in what I see, but also identifying spirit and flesh, fleshly things. Yeah, but you don't like go places in with your eyes. See Demons. No, I don't see demons. Yeah, a lot of people do. And plenty of people have sat in that chair, have have talked about their ability to see, even seen angels in this room back here, which I don't doubt that I don't, I don't see it with my eyes, but it doesn't surprise. It doesn't change my belief in understanding that they are there.

1:50:26 But some people do have this ability to, to see where their eyes, like Elisha talked about when and his servant were he's like, open their eyes so they can see. Yeah, OK, we're good. So anyway, I, I'm, that's a fascinating topic for a lot of people. And, you know, when, when there are these encounters like that, I always wonder, did a gift come with that?

1:50:52 And sometimes, a lot of times it does. And you know, we shouldn't make our faith about the gifts that we have. I think we should seek the higher gifts so that we can build up others and and the church. But. That's what he said to me about two weeks ago. He said there are a lot of people who are more into the gifts and, for example, healing. And he says, OK, you get heal, then what? And I remember vividly him saying to me, where are the men of old?

1:51:33 Like what? Like what does that mean? Where are the men of old? And I said they're not, they're not here. I said they're not here. And he says exactly. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah, well, I mean a healing like that, I mean, we've had a few of them on here and it just it just causes people to glorify God and.

1:51:54 And for, for skeptics that are battling with whether there's a real God or not, it's hard for them to explain things like that without there being a God. And, and so I think he uses things like that to bring people into the Kingdom. And, and so when, when there is a person who has the gift of healing and they are actively going into places with that gift and, and healing is taking place, whatever doubts that remained in the people who were in the area are suddenly diminished quite a bit. So I think there's a there's that. So anyway, let me ask you this.

1:52:33 What do you, what do you think was the catalyst? You talk about a heart posture that maybe you didn't even identify before. What do you think was the catalyst for your encounters? Yeah, like I shared, it was the heart. Yeah. My heart yielding like I yielded years ago. Yeah. And then there's a build up.

1:52:55 As I said there, you can see different things happening. Me receiving different revelations. I'm going to share this with you. I think this one is a vision he showed me, like me hovering over a stadium. And in that stadium, you had a hundreds and thousands of people. And in those people, not everybody, there were like little lights in them. Not, not all of them had the light in them. And they were running around, moving. And he said to me, do you know how I identify my people? It's by the light that I see in them, and I don't see them as those people that they think they are. I identify them by the light, and what I discover is that light that they talk about is that light of Jesus burning in his people.

1:54:03 And when God look at you, we don't see you as you. We see you as his Son, Jesus. That's why Jesus came. We called him the light of the world. And so I was amazed by that. I was truly amazed by that because I know a lot of times people judge people by what they do, you know, like their actions. And God don't see them like that.

1:54:34 Like the, the, the thoughts of man is not like how God thinks. Yeah. And he identifies them and sees them as the light. So so. Do you think this awakening to the fact that we are Spirit. Yeah. I, I, I was wondering when you came, it's like, OK, I wonder what do you think is the key to unlocking this deep connection relationship with God?

1:55:07 That's more of a moment by moment revelation filled power feel filled experience versus sort of the I'll see you on Sunday Christianity that that so many people experience. What do you think is the key to unlocking that kind of relationship with God? I believe it's getting to the point where you say it's no longer I who live, but Christ live in me and I'm willing to live moment by moment according to what the plans you have for me.

1:55:50 It's like, it's like this vessel that we have is like allowing, like saying, God, you know what, I'm going to let you use me for your glory and what you want me to be and what you want me to do for you. Yeah, there there's. So it's like you're, you're at the point where you're giving up your own desires. It's it's, it's, it's, it's literally that. Yeah.

1:56:16 Because I think a lot of times we want to hold on to what we want and what we like and what we enjoy. And and and I'm not saying like in Christ, you can't enjoy those things. And that's not what I'm saying. But is he first? Yeah. And then he says what the Scripture says, Seek ye first the Kingdom of God, and all these righteousness, and what?

1:56:40 All these things will be added to you. But you see what I'm saying? It's not seeking those things. And then you add God. You understand what I'm saying? That's effectively my life verse actually. Oh, really? If there's a number one verse for me, it is Matthew 633. And every question that I have on how we're going to navigate whatever, making ends meet, doing what I do here or anything else, it's like, Oh, yeah, I'm just going to, I'm just going to seek you and your Kingdom and your righteousness and all these things I'm worried about are taken care of. And so, yeah, yeah.

1:57:22 And not thinking about how they're going to work themselves out because sometimes we get to the point. Sometimes we get to the point, you're like, OK, this need to happen 1st and then this and then this. And then God is like whoa, I want this to happen 1st and I'm going to do this. And I think sometimes the answer to the questions that we have are delayed while we're doing all that maneuvering in our minds.

1:57:49 And at some point while I'm laying on that hospital bed, having that heart attack with four cardiologists standing around me, that could solve it in an instant. Do I have to just say, OK, I don't know, you do it and I quit. So I'm just going to give myself to you and let you fix this and heal this.

1:58:17 And and I'm not going to consider my possible solutions any longer. It's funny how the solutions, all the solutions we manufacture in our minds of the only possibilities that these things can be solved almost never occur as we've laid the options out. He always chooses, in my experience anyway, something that I just.

1:58:45 Never thought of. It was inconceivable as an option and if I'm open to that and I don't have to have him step in as a predetermined that he must, then I find that's when I see miracle signs and wonders. And the amazing thing I know when you're when you said that, I remember one season I was, you know, at my in Texas and we went through the season.

1:59:18 We weren't, you know, we were winning, but it came time for the national tournament and you know, all these boards gather and they have to vote on who make it to the national tournament. And I sat there with my assistant coaches and I was like calculating all the possible way we could get into the tournament.

1:59:39 And I had about 5 different ways and all those five got cancelled by either A-Team winning or something changing a number ranked team who would have, you know, allow us all of those cancelled and we got voted in. I can't tell you how. And you know what God said to me? He said I am powerful enough to change a heart of people and to make it go in your favor. And let me tell you something.

2:00:11 God loves us so much or you. God loves you so much. He loves you so much that he'll make. The entire group or wherever you are coming to subjection just for you. Yeah, just for you, it's a hard thing to consider and think about, but we always think that God's got some capacity limits and he's trying to do all these things and he's too busy and, and it's never that way.

2:00:39 It's it's always that He is, from your perspective at least anyway, our perspective that He is exclusively focused on us as we walk in obedience to Him. Let me ask you this. What is it like to know God the way you know God? I remember probably about six months before moving to Alabama when I when I am leaving my house.

2:01:15 And in my heart, I'm leaving the. House. As Spirit, as Jesus. And in my heart and in my spirit. I condition. Myself as walking into any unknown and be able to function fully as I hear Jesus. Says I do what my father tells. Me to do and I say what he tells me to say. And Jesus had power to do everything on his own, and so this.

2:01:48 Loving. Father son relationship is the same relationship God wants. To have with us. And so as we live this life, you still have power with the Spirit on the inside of you to do what you want. And you can't manipulate the Spirit of God because he has to be do according to His will. But I think he wants to do it in this intimate, intense relationship with us that wherever you go, whatever you do like, you're in your mind, renewing your mind. It says continually be renewed in the spirit of your mind. And as you continue to renew?

2:02:26 Your your mind in who you are in Him is you. You walk and live every day and whatever you encounter, you're open to allowing him to speak into you through. You to operate. In whatever you have going on, no matter what it is, Is that what knowing God, yes. So that's what knowing for me looks like.

2:02:52 Is him. Through you, yeah. Yeah. What is your message? Why are you? What does he? Have you here? I believe he has me here to to have. People understand that. You cannot worship God from your. Flesh. The scripture says that the. Natural men know not the things of God because. They're spiritually discerned. And I want to unlock, unlock that. God have me here to unlock that for a lot of believers. This is for believers.

2:03:35 I know it's for unbelievers too, because it made me hear the message. And believe. What is it specifically for believers who have been fighting all this time, not understanding why things are not happening or why they're things are the way they are? And and it's so understanding that spirit is spirit, flesh is flesh, and that once you learn your.

2:03:59 Your new identity by renewing your mind. In the Word of God and knowing what He says about you, then you start to operate as such and you're going to realize for yourself that you're going to start building this amazing. Relationship. With Dad and you're going to be transformed effortlessly. I remember when because I'm an athlete, I was very aggressive athlete and I used to see issues with it and I I remember praying and asking God to help me to.

2:04:32 Take that aggression away. And I've tried many different ways. I've been doing good for two or three weeks. And then back to. My old way and I remember when I truly understood what this was and I started to walk in it and I saw effortless change. I did not try to do it and it's still going strong to this day and I can't tell you. Oh, I studied these 5.

2:05:06 Steps and he says do this. And after doing this. Then I have to do that. I just completely yield to the Spirit and say, Lord, moment by moment, walk with you, here I am. I let go of. Everything that I'm trying, I'm trying to do and then I'll I'll listen. To what you have me do and. Follow where, where, wherever you, you know you want me.

2:05:32 And as I start reading the word and he start renewing my mind and changing the way my how I think. And that's where the renewal takes place, because once it starts, you start seeing different and then it, it, it, you know, it comes in the heart. You're going to see transformation. You're going to see transformation, I promise. What's this person's?

2:05:55 First step. Who has never lived this way has. Never thought of himself as. Spirit, they just said, hey, look, I said the prayer and I got the baptism. I got bills to pay and kids to raise and all this kind of stuff. I'm trying to live a good life. I'm technically a Christian, so I hope I'm going to go to heaven when I die.

2:06:17 I've never viewed myself as spirit. What's the first step? Talk to Dad because you have a lot of people they tell. People oh go do this. Read the word, and when you read the word and you're not reading it with. God alongside you, they still say, oh, I can't see it. And, and, and there's something that God revealed to me or when after reading the scripture where Jesus says no one can come on to me unless the Father brings them. I remember one time I was sharing something to a gentleman.

2:06:58 And he said to me, why do you? Think God revealed things to you and not other people. And I said I didn't thought of that question or anything. And the Holy Spirit said to me. Because of their. Heart. The heart is where God. Wants to meet you and once he meets you there. It's you and Him hand in hand in this life, and He will lead and guide you into all truths as you renew your mind in this in the Word, and renew your mind in the Spirit. Of God and who He is and who?

2:07:40 You are and He will take you along this amazing journey. And it's not, oh, I feel bad because I'm doing it. No, God is not like that. God is going to meet. You where you are. And he's going to walk because everybody's life. And that's why it's called a personal relationship. That's why it's so.

2:08:02 Special and I think a lot of people don't understand it like yes, God will take the time out to be with you and walk with you and like a like a little child be like, does the child know like worry about bills, worry what time they're going to eat or what they're going to eat or where it's coming from.

2:08:20 They don't care. They Google Gaga run around play and they don't care about anything. That's literally the same way God wants us to be and that's my message. I can't tell you, oh, do this or just trust him. Trust open up your heart and trust him and let him lead and guide you and it's going to be the most amazing journey because now you start talk talking to him like you're talking to me. I like and God talk to you and you know, let me share this with you.

2:08:47 I had my brother, he was living in Jamaica. He smokes, he used to smoke. He don't smoke anymore. He used to smoke. And I remember him wanting to stop and I said don't worry about it. So just keep talking to dad. And one day he called me at my job. In Texas and he. Was bawling his eyes out. And I was like, what's going on?

2:09:10 What's wrong? And he was like, Sis, you can't believe what God just said to me. He said you stopped smoking. And you didn't even. Realize, he says I heard him. He just spoke to me and he was crying. He was so. Tearful like bawling his eyes out and I just smiled and I just thank the Lord because people feel like they have to stop what they're doing to to forgot to meet them where they are.

2:09:37 Change or it's effortless change when it happen you won't even notice. Yeah. You, you, you did say a couple things though that I think are are key and there are things that. That we, we do play a role in that we seek him, right? So we, we, we ask him, the prodigal son. We've talked about this before, you know the the dad ran and met him. But he didn't go take him out.

2:10:05 Of the town when he had his back to him, it was after the son had turned toward the father. He saw him a long way off and then he ran to him. And So what you said is so good in that Talk to him, ask him like show me that I am spirit and that we. Are one. Show me. Probably going to take you to John 17. It may be a place where he reveals that. Which is if you haven't.

2:10:31 Read the high priestly prayer, which is John 17. It's it's the only place in Scripture and quite lengthy at that, where Jesus is actually in prayer to the Father. So it's really powerful, but he talks about that. But is it? Is it is talking to him, asking him and. Then the other thing. That you said is. Is you taking.

2:10:59 The posture of being open to him. You cannot set your box in front. Of him and say cram your. Solutions into that. And if you're open to that, there's, there's a, there's a posture of being open because you're, you're, you're, you're, you're saying, Dad, use me for your glory for. It's not about me anymore there. When you get to that posture, it's saying Dad, I'm open. It's.

2:11:33 No longer I who live. It's not about me anymore. I I. I surrender. Whatever my ideologies are, whatever my belief, whatever I think or know or whatever I want or like, I give that up for you because I think you're worth it. Open to him living through you, yes. Open to him being one. With you. Not.

2:11:58 Being God. In heaven and you, another one of the specs. Down here. It's not that at all. Open to him living in you and through you. He's funny. It's risky, man. He's funny. He'll give you jokes and. And he talks to you like? Normal like it's the adventure of a. Lifetime for me it. Is it is he'll talk about it seems like Oh no, what did I? Relinquish control and it all goes. Haywire.

2:12:26 I've never. In my life spoken to another human being that said I truly. Relinquished it to him. And it's a decision I regret. I haven't heard any of them. Me neither. I hear a lot of regret. At the at their deathbed, at the. End of life. When they. Tried to grab as much fame, money, power, pleasure as they could. It's like, wasn't it?

2:12:58 I was wrong. I've never heard. The opposite I've never heard somebody say I get I truly surrendered my life to God and it was one of the worst decisions I've ever made that should that should be a lesson to all of us, but. You know, I, I, I. Tried to be a a place, a vessel that. God. Uses to reveal this uncommon level of connection with him that I believe I have experienced over the last couple of decades that he's pulled me into now here and I'm not trying to position myself a super pious righteous none of those things Heaven knows I'm far from and I I I do actively try to live my life free from sin now and I think we can do that if we if we really decide to do that but he has put in me a hunger for him. That's one thing that I think

2:13:58 that's another. Desire cause. I remember praying for a desire for. Him and once I I did that and I and I truly meant that from my heart like a a true desire. Now everything I do, I want to read the script. I want to jump into scriptures or if my in my car, I'm listening to like my kids want to change, but the music in the car and I'm like, I want to hear something. I want to hear that like so everything around what I like. That's what I want to hear.

2:14:26 Yeah, but the revelation you got that you are spirit and. He is spirit and you are one basically, in my view sort of blew all the the the fences off of what you feel like or what we feel like we must be contained in as humans as a relative to God. And it's like, no, if we're both spirit. What do I not have?

2:14:58 Access to? Why do you have access? To it, why am I? Am I? What am I restricted to? And it's like that's. Just. It you're not, the only restrictions you have are the ones that you have placed on yourself 100% and God wants the fullness of relationship with Him. He's not. Reserved that. For the Peters and Billy Graham's of the world or whoever else you view view as these super religious, righteous Christian guys, it's not confined to that. No, your only restrictions are the ones that you've placed. On your own relationship.

2:15:37 With him and when you recognize that. You are. Spirit and He is Spirit and you are one dwelling inside of you. Every power, every gift, Hallelujah is at your fingertips as He lives through you. Yes, I you don't love. How you sum that? Up right, yeah, you don't have to reach out to that person that's. Really close to God to pray for healing for you. No, you got it.

2:16:03 It's in you. It's in you. It's in you, it's in you, it's in you, It is that place. In that awakening of spirit and what that really means. And I you are exactly right, because when you get that revelation and you go into scripture, you see it where you never saw it before it becomes alive. It is start to talk with you. I'm, I'm telling you, I, I promise you. People are going to start reading scripture different. And it's going to be like.

2:16:36 That it's the first time they've ever read it and they even though they've read it so many times, but now it start popping out. You're like, I'm not. It says this about me. What? You're going to see Holy Spirit recognize that you are spirit and God is spirit and you are. One and see it in the things that. Jesus taught.

2:16:53 Yes, he said. If you can't understand earthly things, how are you supposed to understand heavenly things? He said Open the parable. Yeah, and then listen to this, he said when the word comes. So people need to be careful with this word. Don't take it for granted, he said. When the word come and you don't understand it, the evil 1 comes and take it away.

2:17:14 So steal it out of your heart and that's why he says God above all Hells, he said guard your heart because out of it flows the issues he said guarded. So how do you guard your heart? There is and and that's another thing when I told. Told you that. Spiritual and carnal things. And when you say guard your heart, how do things enter you?

2:17:36 Through hearing and seeing. And So what are you looking at and what are you hearing? And if it's not spirit, you guard your heart and you don't let it come in because then that's going to shape how you see things, how you handle things. And I promise. You you can prove it for yourself. Guard your heart. Live as though you are spirit.

2:18:00 Yes, because you. Are you are? You are. And you will eternally be, you'll eternally be spirit. Yes, this will pass. Away. Yes, that's an awakening, and that's the awakening. That I feel like. I I. Wanted to try to. Discuss and surface in this conversation it it came through in our phone conversation and in an unexpected way and our prayers that God spoke through speaks through us and that he reveal this to those that are are on the other end of this right now. And so I would just say, go to God in prayer and and say. Lord.

2:18:49 Show me this mystery. Reveal this to me. It is a. Mystery that's hidden. In plain sight from those who are not open to it. So make me open to it and reveal it to me. And that revelation is like a flower bursting forth in bloom. It's been dormant forever and it's just life. And we pray that for you, Alicia Wilson, you lived in an extraordinary life that started with a a surrender to God.

2:19:26 Show me what you got, man. And he and he watered. A dry plant. And it began. To spring forth. And as. You've grown in your. Faith, he's shown you more. You've been faithful over a little and so you've been given more. And I, I think whatever ministry has looked like for you up until this point is about to burst forth. I remember when.

2:19:59 You said like you know I need. To send a video. I was like, I don't know what. That looks like how am I? Supposed to do it because I haven't shared this and I remember when I spoke to you over the phone I said Dad is this is this time is this what you want is it Are you ready for me to to share and he said yeah there's an awakening that we are spirit that he's put in you to communicate and to.

2:20:26 For your life to be a reflection of that and I know that you teach it in the places you go. You're you're a successful collegiate women's soccer coach and and it brings you into all kinds of places. I think it's just getting started for you. I really do. The life you've lived, you've lived a life filled with knowing who you are in Christ and living as spirit.

2:20:53 But I think this is the beginning. I do too, because I think he has. I'm still growing and learning every day. I hope so, I hope. We all are, you know, of of. Getting closer to how Jesus walked. Because he did it. He did it and and he. Was hand in hand. With with Dad. And so in the scriptures it says Jesus is our example.

2:21:23 And so I think as we transform from glory to glory, we're we're trying to mold. Ourself in the very. Image of him so we can walk and operate as he did because he says I have overcome the world. And you will. Too, he said. We will. That's how you walk in spirit, in the material. World Yes, yes, take a look at how Jesus lived his life.

2:21:52 Yes, he. Lived the spirit that he is. In the flesh that he was given, yes, that's a, that's a different way to see that. Yeah, we think of him. Living a sinless. Life he did. But he lived because he. Lived in the Spirit. And not the flesh. He did 100% He did I just that that redefines everything that happened.

2:22:17 When he was tempted in the garden. Or in the wilderness, the agony that in the garden I I just start thinking back over his life and this awakening to him living a fleshly life. But as spirit. That'll be shaped that that. That'll that. I can feel that. Can you feel that? I can feel that. Maybe it's just me, but he's speaking to me there. But no.

2:22:50 So thank you for sharing. I mean, this is the first time we've had a chance to sit down together. And I love I get to do this. I mean, what a what a blessing this is for me. I love it and I love sharing. I love hearing God speak through people like you in these conversations. What goes on at this table.

2:23:08 God is using it to transform the world. But it's starting, I promise you. It's starting right here with me. And everybody that watches this gets to watch my faith get shaped with every every conversation. And it does. And he's. Always working in US and I am thankful. I am thankful that I get to do this and I and I'm thankful.

2:23:32 For beautiful people. Like you, who he has touched in deep ways that then come to places like this to share it so that he can take what he's done in you and multiply it into the world. And I know that he's done just that today. Alicia Wilson, thank you. Thank you. Thank you for having. Me. It's been a pleasure.

2:23:52 Have you ever really considered what it means? To live as spirit. And in spirit, to truly be one with God. Like we read so frequently in Scripture. Alicia has had her share of encounters, no doubt, but it's all letter to a place of intimacy with God in spirit that completely directs her life. I'll admit that this conversation created a revelation in me personally that has drawn me into a fuller understanding of oneness with God.

2:24:26 He's not up there and us down here the way so many of us tend to think. What a powerful revelation. Thank you for joining us today on A Stronger Faith. Before you go, double check to make sure that you're subscribed to our channel. The experiences that are shared here are transformational, not just interesting.

2:24:48 And there's a lot more to come. If you've had your own experiences with God and you believe that, you might make a great guest with us. Please visit. A Stronger faith.org/contact to learn how to become a guest with us. And if you feel like God may be calling you to support this ministry by joining our community of donors, please visit astrongerfaith.org/give for some convenient giving options.

2:25:16 Until next time, we pray that you come into the revelation that you are one with God and that He builds a stronger faith in you and in those you love.