Stop Looking for a Happy Marriage | Sh. Yaser Birjas & Sh. Ammar AlShukry

Sh. Yaser Birjas has couples coming to him 2 weeks after the wedding talking about divorce.In his first appearance on the AlMaghrib Podcast, Sh. Yaser sits down with Sh. Ammar AlShukry to answer the questions he has been asked most in over 20 years of teaching and counseling on love and marriage. He starts by challenging the question everyone asks first. You shouldn't be chasing a happy marriage. Happiness isn't a goal you reach. It's the reward for contentment, and the objective Allah gives for marriage in the Quran is sakinah: peace and tranquility with your spouse.Together, they cover:Fights. Why most couple fights come down to "you're disturbing my peace".Love languages. The 5 love languages, and where each one shows up in the Sunnah.Single lifestyle. Getting married but still wanting to live single.Social media. What it is doing inside our marriages, even in our bedrooms.Intercultural marriage. Interracial and intercultural marriage, and why the future of the community is in its diversity.Parents. How much say they should have in who you marry, and when families should start the conversation.Gender roles. What the Quran and Sunnah define and what is culture.Money. Who pays when she earns more than he does.Searching. Why finding a spouse has become so exhausting, and how to get out of the "browsing cycle"."You follow the rules Allah put, you will have a successful marriage. You want to make it happy, that's on you."Chapters 0:00 Intro 2:36 Why a happy marriage is the wrong goal 5:53 The real objective of marriage: sakinah 7:29 Why couples fight: you're disturbing my peace 8:40 The 5 love languages in the Sunnah 11:16 Married but still living single 12:09 Love them on their terms 16:07 Make it or break it: now it's 6 months 18:10 How social media is hollowing out marriages 20:15 Interracial and intercultural marriage 24:13 How much say should parents have? 27:00 Start the marriage conversation early 32:56 Gender roles in Islam: what's divine and what's culture 37:08 Who pays when she earns more? 42:45 Why finding a spouse feels so exhausting 47:41 Keep it simpleBooks mentioned: The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman, and The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman.Guest: Sh. Yaser Birjas is a senior instructor at AlMaghrib and the imam at Valley Ranch Islamic Center. For over 20 years he has taught and counseled on love and marriage. His AlMaghrib courses include The Fiqh of Love, Love Notes and Protect This House.Host: Sh. Ammar AlShukry is a Director and instructor at AlMaghrib and the imam at Clear Lake Islamic Center in Houston. He studied Quran, hadith, aqidah, fiqh, and tafsir with teachers across the United States. He is known for courses such as A Mindful Salah, His Majesty, The Names of Allah and the Dhikr series, and for his poetry, collected in his book What the Pen Wrote.#Marriage #IslamicMarriage #AlMaghribPodcast #YaserBirjas #AmmarAlshukryEvery episode of the AlMaghrib Podcast is free, and it stays that way because of people who support the studio. If this conversation helped you, help us keep making more like it.👉 almaghrib.org/powerthestudio