The Pumpkin That Fought Back - Magic Costume Tree - A Halloween Bedtime Story

0:04 Hello, friends from across the nation and around the world. I'm Martin, and you are listening to Dad's Bedtime Stories. And tonight, as promised, we'll be headed back into a very special world. One of my favorite story worlds, in fact. Especially near Halloween. The Magic Costume Tree. I asked at pretty much the last minute if anyone had any ideas for the series, and you guys didn't disappoint. Let's check out the one I chose for tonight.

0:41 Hi, Dad's Fan Time Stories. I'd like to suggest a Magic Costume Tree series episode. It's like you have a costume that's like a pumpkin. and there's a jack-o'-lantern thief, so you go up to porches and turn into a jack-o'-lantern, and then you try to catch the jack-o'-lantern thief. Bye, I love your podcasts.

1:11 I thought that was an excellent idea, and I had a lot of fun thinking about what a jack-o'-lantern costume would be like. Now as a small disclaimer, in this episode... being sort of a halloween episode we do scare other people now they don't scare us to be clear like as the main character you do not get scared but you do decide to scare others so if that bothers you or something maybe listen to a different episode of the podcast if not i hope you enjoy it if you like the podcast don't forget that there's lots of ways to support it You can join us on Patreon, you can write a review, you can continue listening, you can share it with friends, or you can check out the new Cards of Power game, or any of the books,

2:04 including a few new graphic novels, the Cards of Power graphic novel, and the Spaceship, or Kid Spaceship graphic novel, which are now available on my website. And, by the way, printing in color costs... A lot of money, so... Yeah, I'm sorry. I tried to price them as low as I actually could. But graphic novels are just expensive, it turns out. So sorry about that. Now it's time to get as comfy as you can in that bed, close your eyes, and imagine yourself doing what the kid in the story does. Imagine yourself in the middle of your own home, sitting at the table, carving. A pumpkin. You're surrounded by the newspaper that you've plastered all over the place to try to keep things clean, even though it's

3:00 pretty much a lost cause. Slippery seeds and strings of orange pumpkin goo. You scoop out one last handful. How does one pumpkin make this much stuff inside it? You ask. Your parent. laughs and slides the bowl closer. Eventually, you finish scraping. You draw two eyes, a nose, and a wide, jagged mouth. With some help, cutting, your jack-o'-lantern begins to take shape. One tooth comes out crooked. You consider fixing it, but the longer you look, the more you like it.

3:44 It gives your pumpkin a slightly ridiculous grin. Plus, it's super hard to change a pumpkin once it's been carved. Your parent helps you place a candle inside and light it. Warm orange light shines through the face. It's perfect, or as perfect as it's gonna get. You carry it outside and set it down beside the front door. That night, sometime after you fall asleep, A strange scraping noise wakes you up. Then comes a muffled laugh. You lift your head from the pillow. For a moment, you listen. Nothing.

4:32 Probably just someone walking past. You snuggle down and go back to sleep. In the morning, you rush outside to check on the pumpkin. You know. blow out the candle or whatever but you don't find a pumpkin at all it's gone you check behind the porch steps beside the house even under a bush although pumpkins don't usually roll under bushes by themselves but still you can't find anything someone has taken your pumpkin You rush in to tell your parents, who are also very upset, especially when they see your face. Later that day, they bring home another pumpkin.

5:26 You carve it carefully, adding a crooked tooth on purpose this time, and by evening, another cheerful face glows beside your door. But by morning, that one is gone too. You stare at the empty spot where your pumpkin once stood. Oh, come on. Two pumpkins. All that carving. All that scooping. And someone stole my pumpkin. You feel like you want to scream. But instead, you decide to go for a short walk. Off to the side of the house. And as you walk, you think. You plot a possible revenge for the people who stole your pumpkin. Maybe even a way to trap the thieves. A pumpkin thief trap of some kind, maybe. You get so lost in thought that when you finally look up again... Well... You find yourself in a completely different place. A place you've been before.

6:48 The magic costume tree. You look around you and your house is completely gone. You're surrounded only by forest. With the large ancient looking magic costume tree in the center. You hurry towards the door. Inside, warm light shines across row upon row of costumes. Some have wings, others have tails, armor, enormous boots, strange-looking hats. Nearby hangs a fluffy dog costume, which could be a lot of fun. And right beside it is a cat costume with pointed ears and a long curly tail. You reach toward it, and then you notice the light. A bright beam shines onto an orange costume further along in the rack. It has arms, legs, and a great big jack-o'-lantern head. Normally, dressing like a vegetable wouldn't be your first choice, but after two stolen pumpkins... Well,

8:08 it seems like a fairly specific coincidence, and the costume tree does tend to appear with certain ideas of its own. Are you going to help me catch them? you ask. The tree remains quiet. The light keeps shining. You lift the costume down and climb inside. Immediately, it adjusts around you. The sleeves settle against your wrists. The legs fit perfectly.

8:45 The pumpkin head lowers comfortably over your own. A warm, fizzy feeling spreads through your body. Somehow, you understand what to do. You relax. Your feet lift from the floor. which feels kind of weird. Orange light shimmers along your arms and legs until they turn into streams of glowing energy, drawing inward until they, well, until they disappear entirely into your pumpkin head. You hover in front of the costume rack, just a floating jack-o'-lantern head, You can still see, and of course you can still hear. You can even smell the wood and costumes around you, which is impressive because your nose is now just a triangle cut out of your face, but either way, you think about moving forward and you glide forward. You think about stopping and you stop.

10:01 This is so cool, you say, though your voice comes out surprisingly deep for some reason. Excellent. You float outside through the door. and you follow the forest path. Before long, the trees thin, and your house appears once again. You drift around to the front, settle beside the door, and become completely still. Inside your head, a little flame flickers, kinda pleasantly, honestly. It feels like sitting beside a fireplace except in this case you are. You are the fireplace.

10:56 After a while your parent opens the door. Now where did this come from? They say looking down at the pumpkin. The you pumpkin. A hand gently turns you toward the street. You nearly say thanks but Fortunately, you catch yourself. Your parent studies your grin. Well, hopefully they leave this one alone.

11:28 I don't know what we're going to do if another one of these pumpkins gets destroyed. The door closes, and you just settle into your pumpkin shape. Something strange happens. Clouds start to hurry overhead. Shadows stretch across the porch. People pass along the pavement in quick little bursts. Whenever you pay attention, everything feels, well, normal, but as soon as you relax, time seems to just sort of slip past.

12:06 Being a pumpkin, apparently, involves very little worrying about a clock. Soon, Evening arrives, much sooner than you'd expect. Porch lights glow, curtains close, the street grows quiet. And eventually, footsteps approach. Several teenagers come along the pavement wearing Halloween masks. One stops at your gate. There's another one! A second teenager hangs back. No, absolutely not. We've already taken two from this house.

12:53 So?

12:54 So maybe stealing a third pumpkin from the same house is kind of pushing it. The tallest one shrugs. It's just a pumpkin. Hands lift you from the porch. You remain perfectly still. content to see exactly where this goes. Well, it's kind of warm. There's a candle inside it, genius. They carry you down the street, stopping at other houses until every one of the teens holds a pumpkin of their own. You can't help but grin just a little bit. Eh, Was its face always like that? One of the teens asks.

13:47 Like what? The other teen says, looking down to study you. Eh, never mind, I must be seeing things. Eventually, the teens leave the road and follow a narrow trail into the woods. Moonlight shines through the branches. And ahead of you is a clearing. Orange pieces cover the ground. Broken pumpkin faces lie among crushed shells and scattered seeds. Some are fresh while others have begun to decay or be eaten by the local wildlife. A pumpkin graveyard. Then you notice a familiar piece near a root. A crooked tooth. Your crooked tooth.

14:52 The pleasant warmth inside you grows a little bit stronger. The teenager carrying you steps into the clearing. Alright, me first, he says. The nervous one looks around to make sure nobody's watching. Can we just do this and go? Your carrier lifts you high overhead. Watch this, he says. He throws you toward the ground as hard as he can.

15:27 But you don't decide to fall. Instead, you decide to stomp right in the air. A few inches above the leaves. Then you slowly turn around to face the kid who threw you. Huh? What's going on? Slowly you rise up into the air. Your eyes brighten. Your mouth fills with orange light. And the tallest teenager takes a step backward.

16:08 Huh?

16:09 Huh? It's floating! One of them yells, I can see that! The other one says, You drift closer. Someone drops their pumpkin beside you. You catch it with a simple thought. Vines shoot out of the ground, wrap around the thing, and gently allow it to, well, lower to the ground.

16:41 What?

16:43 It's alive! Then you speak. The voice that rolls out of your mouth is deep enough to make you feel, well, rather impressed with yourself. You have attempted to destroy my kind. One too many times. The teenagers stare. And now you pause, you know, to be dramatic. You have been judged. One teenager points a shaking finger. It's gotta be a drone or something like that. You turn your head completely around. Then, you turn it back. Orange energy streams from beneath you.

17:43 Arms unfold. Legs stretch downward. Your feet settle onto the ground. Now, you stand before them in your orange suit. Your enormous pumpkin head glowing above your shoulders. Something stirs inside the costume. You can suddenly feel another power. You tip your head back as the power inside you swells, and a great plume of fire shoots upward, roaring into the open sky above the clearing. It lights every teenager's startled face Luckily, none of the leaves catch fire. Somehow, you feel like you know exactly where the flames can go. The teenagers scream. Then, they run. Or try to. You think about stopping them and the ground rustles. Thick green pumpkin vines shoot through the leaves and curl around their ankles. Not so fast,

19:08 you say. The vines stop them, gently but firmly. Obviously, you don't want to actually hurt anyone. Smaller tendrils climb upward, hook the edges of their masks, and pull them free. You look from face to face.

19:30 Please.

19:30 Please. says the tallest one. We didn't know. We didn't know pumpkins were like alive or whatever. We're totally sorry. You fold your arms. Didn't know. Yeah, I'm sorry. The teenager looks at your burning face. Didn't know I was alive. Would it have been acceptable if I weren't? Nobody answers. You glance at the broken pieces around your feet. Someone grew these pumpkins. Someone chose them. Someone carried them home and worked very hard carving their faces. And some of those people We're looking forward to seeing them shine. The nervous teenager looks down. We're sorry. You feel like your anger could soften a little bit, but you aren't quite finished.

20:56 For breaking my kind, you announce, you must suffer the consequences. Several pairs of eyes widen. You let your face grow brighter. Your punishment shall be... You pause for a long time. One teenager makes a tiny squeaking sound. It shall be... The fire inside you gathers, then... An enormous inferno surges into the air, the clearing flashes orange, and the teenagers all shriek, every single one of them. Well, they wet their pants. They totally pee their pants. You hadn't expected that, but, well, it's kind of perfect, honestly. For a moment, it takes all of your concentration to keep your enormous pumpkin voice suitably serious and not break out laughing. The flames settle.

22:15 You lower your head. Your punishment shall be the memory of this night and the feeling of wetting your pants. Silence. Silence. Then somebody lets out a very shaky breath. But before you go, there is something you must do. You point toward the intact pumpkins. You will return every pumpkin you have taken to the house it belongs to. And for those pumpkins that have been destroyed, you will replace them.

23:09 With a thought, more vines grow out of the ground, instantly giving birth to new pumpkins that grow quickly to full-sized pumpkins. And you will apologize. In person, to everyone you've harmed. We totally will, the tallest one says. To everyone, you repeat. Yes, absolutely. We'll bring the pumpkins back and we'll apologize to everyone. Then you may begin. The teenagers quickly scramble to collect the pumpkins... The nervous teenager picks up two, tucking one carefully beneath each arm. No one suggests smashing anything and, well, they hurry toward the path, stumbling over their own feet and probably being wildly uncomfortable with the wet pants thing. Carry them carefully, you call.

24:24 We are.

24:25 We totally are carrying them carefully. Soon, You float up above the edge of the woods, your arms and legs disappearing into your pumpkin head once again. You watch as the teenagers emerge from the forest, back onto the street, and begin returning the pumpkins. At your house, the tallest sets one beside the door and presses the doorbell. YOU HEAR THE BEGINNINGS OF A VERY AWKWARD APOLOGY. SATISFIED, YOU DRIFT AWAY, CARRIED BY A SENSE THAT YOU CAN'T QUITE PLACE, BEYOND YOUR HOUSE, ABOVE A FOREST, TO A CLEARING WHERE THE MAGIC COSTUME TREE NOW STANDS. You slowly lower yourself down.

25:30 The door to the tree opens and you float inside. Your arms and legs appear once again. You land on the ground and unzip the suit. Suddenly, you feel your own head appear back inside the pumpkin head. And your body feels... You pull the head off, pull off the arms and legs, and hang it carefully inside the tree once again. You head outside, hoping that you'll see the tree soon once more. You head straight down the forest path, and almost magically... You appear behind your house once more.

26:28 You walk around the front, open up the door, only to be met by your parent. You're never gonna guess who came by. Really? Maybe I could guess, you say. I don't think so. These teenagers from the neighborhood came by with their pants all wet and stuff. And they totally apologized. I guess they're the ones who, well, broke the pumpkins. They brought you a new one. Oh, that's awesome.

27:04 But I'm feeling kind of tired, you say. Maybe we'll carve it tomorrow. All right. Well, good night, your parent says. And you head straight for your bedroom. You open the door. quickly change into your pajamas, and you climb into the bed. You pull the covers up to your chin, you close your eyes, and you focus on your breath. With each breath, you release the tension from your arms, then from your legs.

27:51 You let your shoulders drop away from your head. You allow your face to soften into a nice half smile. And you sink down deeper and deeper into the mattress. The more you breathe, the deeper you sink. And the deeper you sink, the better you feel. Until soon it feels like you're floating on a cloud, and your mind wanders off to thoughts of new dreams and new adventures to come. Good night, everyone. Thank you.

30:04 Thank you.

30:46 Thank you. Thank you.

32:46 You Thank you.

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37:13 Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

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41:26 Thank you. you Thank you.

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45:00 Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

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52:08 Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.