Mage Hand High Five

Thank God It's Doomsday - Ep. 1: Surprise Inspection

· 1 h 34

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<p>Heralding the Irrevocable Apocalypse is a real team effort. While Void Mother Boslara the Sweet is the face of the Great Chantry, there are thousands of people behind the scenes making sure the end of the world runs smoothly. <em>Thank God It’s Doomsday</em> follows a crew of lowly Chantry support staff determined to herald in the apocalypse — and claw their way out of middle management — once and for all. Featuring special guests Shenuque Tissera and Robin Ekberg.</p><p>CW: Suggestive humor</p><p><br></p><p>Special thanks to <a href="koboldpress.com/kpstore/affiliate/MHH5/"; rel="nofollow">Kobold Press</a> for sponsoring <em>Thank God It's Doomsday </em>as part of the 2025 Kobold Creates Program. To enter to win a hardcover copy of Kobold Press' Labyrinth Adventures and the Labyrinth Worldbook, follow us on <a href="instagram.com/magehandhighfive/"; rel="nofollow">Instagram</a> or <a href="app.bsky.cz/profile/magehandhighfive.bsky.soci…; rel="nofollow">Bluesky</a> and DM us the code word mentioned at the beginning of this episode.</p><p>Check out the Kobold Press store: <a href="koboldpress.com/kpstore/affiliate/MHH5/"; rel="nofollow">www.koboldpress.com/kpstore/affiliate/MHH5/</a></p><p><br></p><p>Find our guest players online at:</p><p>Robin: <a href="instagram.com/captainkrail/?hl=en"; rel="nofollow">@captainkrail</a></p><p>Shenuque: <a href="instagram.com/shenuque/"; rel="nofollow">@shenuque</a></p><p><br></p><p><a href="patreon.com/magehandhighfive/"; rel="nofollow">Join us on Patreon</a> and get early access to future merch drops as well as our after-show talkback, Mage Hand Down Low.</p><p><br></p><p>Merch is now available now at <a href="mhh5-shop.fourthwall.com/password"; rel="nofollow">magehandhighfive.com/store</a>!</p><p><br></p><p>Leave us a review; if you do, we may shout you out on the show!</p><p> </p><p>GM: Max Weinberg</p><p>Indika: Shenuque Tissera</p><p>Bartholomew: Robin Ekberg</p><p>Sonya: Casey Papas</p><p>Merrick: Rowan McStay</p><p> </p><p>Theme music by Jacob Kerzner. Additional Music from Epidemic Sound.</p><p><br></p><p> Edited by Max Weinberg and Rowan McStay</p><p>Sound design by Rowan McStay</p><p>Logo by Shane Smith</p><p><br></p><p>Additional sound attribution: 2-pop by kwahmah_02 -- freesound.org/s/316854 -- License: Creative Commons 0</p><p><br></p><p><a href="magehandhighfive.com/"; rel="nofollow">magehandhighfive.com</a></p><p>Follow your new third-favorite actual play podcast on our socials:</p><p><a href="discord.gg/6pbzxEcAwq"; rel="nofollow">Discord</a></p><p><a href="facebook.com/magehandhighfive"; rel="nofollow">Facebook</a></p><p><a href="instagram.com/magehandhighfive/"; rel="nofollow">Instagram</a></p><p><a href="tiktok.com/@magehandhighfive"; rel="nofollow">TikTok</a></p><p><a href="app.bsky.cz/profile/magehandhighfive.bsky.soci…; rel="nofollow">Bluesky</a></p><p><br></p><p>Mage Hand High Five is a member of the Many Sided Media network</p>

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[SPEAKER_07]: the Labyrinth, the realm of the astral superhighway connecting the innumerable worlds of the universe, the void, an ever-hungering nothingness seeking to unmake the universe. [SPEAKER_07]: At the center of the Labyrinth stands eager to seal the world tree and knowing upon its roots the ancient serpent needhog speaks.

[SPEAKER_07]: In the courtyard of the Great Chantry, a crowd gathers, an abalconi above stands void mother Bostlar of the suite, leader of the Great Chantry. [SPEAKER_07]: Behind her stands one of the oldest menuel ever see Elder Jaspargalavid, the most senior scribe. [SPEAKER_07]: In her dark and ostentatious headdress Bostlara addresses the order.

[SPEAKER_07]: My children, elder Levide has brought me needogs most recent prophecy. [SPEAKER_07]: The time is nigh. [SPEAKER_07]: The irrevocable apocalypse is upon us. [SPEAKER_07]: It is my honor to present to you the harreld of the apocalypse, Arc Angel Cal Beleth. [SPEAKER_07]: And from above the cathedral descends an angel and pitch black armor, a halo of starfire hovers above her head.

[SPEAKER_07]: The clanking from the chains of her broken manacles ring out as she lifts her great sword. [SPEAKER_07]: Bustlara continues, now my herald. [SPEAKER_07]: The void is hungry, it is time to fee. [SPEAKER_07]: Wait, silence! [SPEAKER_07]: Pervoys booms as the crowd goes quiet. [SPEAKER_07]: She points to the back of the courtyard.

[SPEAKER_07]: Who are you? [SPEAKER_07]: An elf in Apollo speaks up. [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, [SPEAKER_07]: Hello and welcome to Mage Hand High 5, I'm your GM Max Weinberg, my pronouns are he him and today we're doing something a little different.

[SPEAKER_07]: This is part one of our mini series, thank God it's Doomsday, which is part of cobalt presses program, cobalt creates for 2025. [SPEAKER_07]: We'll be using the Tales of the Valleyant Game System, which like many TTRPGs has you rolling dice to help determine the outcomes of your choices and the story.

[SPEAKER_07]: If you'd like what you hear and want to learn more about tales of the valiant or anything cobbled press does, head on over to cobbledpress.com using the affiliate link in the episode description because if you do it, it really helps us out. [SPEAKER_07]: But now that that stuff's done, we've got some familiar faces, we've got some amazing guests, so without further ado, joining me, ranked from least to most likely to eat stinky food in the break room.

[SPEAKER_06]: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, just isn't just male.

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, this goes thing. [SPEAKER_06]: God, I don't know why there's nothing else on it. [SPEAKER_06]: Dexed is Robin Eckberg. [SPEAKER_07]: Nice. [SPEAKER_07]: Cool. [SPEAKER_07]: Feels UK-ly charged there. [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_05]: I have read Sam and in the break room. [SPEAKER_05]: Many times.

[SPEAKER_04]: Why? [SPEAKER_05]: It's not even that bad. [SPEAKER_05]: It doesn't even matter if you want to make it a big deal out of it. [UNKNOWN]: Thank you. [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah, it's actually, I'm fine with it, and I'd be the one for people I has at all guys. [SPEAKER_05]: My name is Robin, I'll kept in Kraylon all things primarily at Dorksborne, which is not a community thing.

[SPEAKER_05]: It is a fuck, guess what? [SPEAKER_05]: me and the greatest person that's ever existed, Dylan Napoleon, play, choice-based games like Dragon Age and Mass Effect, and then we talk about it like a book club. [SPEAKER_05]: It's very good. [SPEAKER_05]: I like it. [SPEAKER_05]: It is very good.

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, check out Darkspot. [SPEAKER_02]: It's a lot of fun. [SPEAKER_07]: Second to most likely to stink up the break room is Rowan Mix Day. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm Ron McStay, I was just going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm going to say I'm

[SPEAKER_07]: And the person most likely to eat stinky food in the break room because they know what they did is Shenuk to Sarah Okay, this is Hold on a second It's not senses this It's just about eggs. [SPEAKER_03]: This is the time This is crazy. [SPEAKER_03]: This is okay. [SPEAKER_03]: Okay. [SPEAKER_03]: That's a breakfast food.

[SPEAKER_03]: I'm not even on the break room. [SPEAKER_03]: You eat today I had to go Okay Do you have any public [SPEAKER_03]: sometimes when I'm running late to something I will I will walk to the train while I peel an egg Okay, just run like an anime girl eating toast, but it's a boiled egg in your mouth It's a one boiled egg Okay, I understand why this happened, but it's not not for this is still bullshit What's all of you [SPEAKER_03]: Anyways, hi everybody.

[SPEAKER_03]: I'm Shenukh, they, they he pronouns. [SPEAKER_03]: This is bullshit. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm here. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm so hot. [SPEAKER_03]: I'm having so much fun. [SPEAKER_03]: This is great. [SPEAKER_03]: May 10th, high five is a delightful time. [SPEAKER_03]: I'm here because Robin Casey and Max put me in a cage and said, I can't leave until we finish this season.

[SPEAKER_03]: I do content on the internet. [SPEAKER_03]: You may have heard me on my first dungeon, and one quarter of many excited media. [SPEAKER_03]: I do stand up around the city of New York City. [SPEAKER_03]: Like I said, the city like everyone lives in my city. [SPEAKER_03]: I also do it across America sometimes.

[SPEAKER_03]: No one's calling Springfield Illinois the city. [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, you're a city baby. [SPEAKER_06]: Maybe. [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_06]: Listen, we all live in New York City. [SPEAKER_06]: This is all New York City. [SPEAKER_07]: There's no recap this time because it's the first episode, but I want to establish one thing before we jump in.

[SPEAKER_07]: Since this is a series in the style of workplace mockumentaries, we'll have talking heads at the end of each scene where characters are speaking directly into the camera. [SPEAKER_07]: Imagine, like on the office, or parks and rack, when those characters step out of the scene and talk directly to the audience.

[SPEAKER_07]: Since we don't have actual cameras, we will transition to talking heads and you'll hear this sound. [SPEAKER_07]: And with that, all I got to say is, thank God it's Doomsday. [SPEAKER_07]: Deep in the Labyrinth, we come upon a great three-storey stone building, the corporate headquarters of the Great Chantry.

[SPEAKER_07]: Home to the accountants making sure they have enough funds, the HR and recruitment teams making sure they have enough bodies, and the warehouse team logging and storing anything and everything that might be needed. [SPEAKER_07]: These people are the backbone of the family, that is the great-chantry, yet they get absolutely none of the glory.

[SPEAKER_07]: It has been several weeks since Needhog's prophecy and everyone has kicked into high gear to make sure the irrevocable apocalypse comes to fruition. [SPEAKER_07]: Players, you're all at your various workstations when the front door is slam open and in walks a group of about 20 identical goblins in white button down shirts and slacks.

[SPEAKER_07]: The leader in the front only discernible by their glasses pushes them up and says, hello, great-chantry HQ, we are from the Department of Interplaner Corporate Health and Safety. [SPEAKER_07]: Your inspection has commenced, please do not interfere with our agents or there will be severe consequences.

[SPEAKER_07]: Now, where is the closest manager? [SPEAKER_07]: And a couple employees look at each other and kind of chuckle a little bit and point to a nearby corner office. [SPEAKER_07]: Thank you. [SPEAKER_07]: The lead agent replies and heads towards that office while the others disperse throughout.

[SPEAKER_07]: We make our way to an office in the back of the first floor. [SPEAKER_07]: I thought I had the corner one. [SPEAKER_07]: Rowan, can you describe your office at the person it belongs to? [SPEAKER_02]: right so my office actually first of all i'm relatively new to the company i've only been here for about six or seven years as opposed to the other folks who have been here anywhere from thirty to a hundred and fifty and uh as such i didn't really get you know office space as it were they sort of just cordoned off with some duct tape and a curtain like a kind of area in the back [SPEAKER_02]: uh... so most of my conversations are overheard by everyone else uh... my name is mary quillaby uh... people call me mary people call me mary uh... probably because of my sonny disposition mary uh... i am uh... mary is a a uh...

[SPEAKER_02]: anyone's ever seen like a weak ork like an ork imagine but with no muscle mass whatsoever like they are like tall and kind of gangly and uh green with like these bottle green eyes [SPEAKER_02]: kind of disheveled hair, look kind of perennially a little tired. [SPEAKER_02]: And I, Merrick, am the regional associate director of humanoid resources, as well as the appointed Moral officer for this particular office, as we are bringing on the apocalypse, and you know, Moral is tough in a world where well, we're trying to bring the end of the world, of course.

[SPEAKER_02]: So, that's Merrick. [SPEAKER_02]: I do have a little, uh, I have a bunch of little chaaches on the desk. [SPEAKER_02]: I have, I'm drinking out of a nice glass of milk, uh, I have, uh, some little rubber duckies, uh, and I have a picture of my pet dragon with me, uh, he's a baby dragon, uh, on the, on the desk.

[SPEAKER_07]: Merrick, you are meeting with another employee at this time, when you hear the sound of someone, [SPEAKER_07]: hitting your curtain as if trying to knock. [SPEAKER_02]: But you can just, you can just flip the curtain open. [SPEAKER_02]: There's not really a door to speak of. [SPEAKER_02]: You can just sort of, I appreciate the attempt at formality, but you can just, you can just scooch the curtain open, if you like.

[SPEAKER_07]: Oh, okay. [SPEAKER_07]: Before you stands, one of the goblin agents looking down at their clipboard makes, Merrick Willaby, you're in charge of morale among other things. [SPEAKER_07]: Do you have a moment to speak with me? [SPEAKER_02]: Absolutely, I do. [SPEAKER_02]: Why don't you come on in?

[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, thank you. [SPEAKER_07]: And that other employee Stores just stand up and the agent says, oh no, no, you're okay. [SPEAKER_07]: You can stay. [SPEAKER_02]: I think it's important that you're here Sure, they shouldn't be a one-on-one meeting. [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, it's yeah. [SPEAKER_02]: No, it's fine I want them here.

[SPEAKER_02]: It is great to meet you and I reach out a hand to shake. [SPEAKER_07]: They shake your hand back [SPEAKER_02]: As they shake my hand, they feel a little... Go off! [SPEAKER_02]: As I have one of those magicians buzzers. [SPEAKER_02]: And this is when I tell you that Merrick is a bard and is a practical magician.

[SPEAKER_02]: Like they do actual magic as well. [SPEAKER_02]: But I think their whole barge stick is that they do kids' parties as a magician. [SPEAKER_02]: And so they kind of buzz this person's hand to go, [SPEAKER_02]: Gotcha there. [SPEAKER_02]: Anyway, I'm just playing around. [SPEAKER_02]: Why don't you come in and sit down?

[SPEAKER_07]: That's interesting and they start writing down a couple notes. [SPEAKER_07]: So company morale is a rather vague term. [SPEAKER_07]: What exactly is it that you do here? [SPEAKER_02]: Right. [SPEAKER_02]: No, that's a great question. [SPEAKER_02]: Well, in addition to my duties, extending beyond into, I do a lot of remedial training with people who are, and I kind of look at the other person who was here for remedial training and whisper to the auditor.

[SPEAKER_02]: potentially about to get fired. [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, yes. [SPEAKER_02]: So make sure that everybody here has the level of success that they deserve here at the Chantry HQ. [SPEAKER_04]: Mm-hmm. [SPEAKER_02]: I do a lot of work trekking in with people, you know, making sure that people are are feeling all right about things.

[SPEAKER_02]: You know, it can get a little heavy and get a little heavy at the end of the world and all that, you know, the endless void that wants to eat everything. [SPEAKER_02]: So I just want to make sure that everybody's okay. [SPEAKER_07]: Interesting. [SPEAKER_07]: Interesting and they've been writing down notes this entire time.

[SPEAKER_02]: By the way, are my manners? [SPEAKER_02]: How are you feeling about all this? [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, I love this. [SPEAKER_07]: Specions are my life. [SPEAKER_02]: Well, I am so glad to hear it. [SPEAKER_02]: And you know what humanoid resources is my life, but it's like we've got something in common.

[SPEAKER_07]: I would like to circle back to one thing that you said. [SPEAKER_07]: You said remediation training or remedial training? [SPEAKER_07]: I want remedial training. [SPEAKER_07]: Yes, that's correct. [SPEAKER_07]: I said, you whispered that this employee was here for that. [SPEAKER_07]: Could you show me?

[SPEAKER_02]: Absolutely, we were just in the middle. [SPEAKER_02]: We were just in the middle of this. [SPEAKER_02]: Yes, absolutely. [SPEAKER_02]: Um, right, uh, Brian. [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_02]: So, uh, you know, one thing that I love about you and the energy and the joy that you bring to this workplace is that you have [SPEAKER_02]: Such a delightful imagination, and you have just a zest for stories and a passion for imaginary things and imaginary worlds.

[SPEAKER_02]: And we really value that here at HQ. [SPEAKER_02]: The problem is that when you've been listening to your audiobooks, the other people around the other cubicles have been hearing them and complaining that they're a little... [SPEAKER_02]: What's the word blue? [SPEAKER_02]: A little, um, smutty, if you will.

[SPEAKER_07]: people just got to get on my level, you know? [SPEAKER_02]: Mm-hmm. [SPEAKER_02]: Okay. [SPEAKER_02]: Uh, well, see, that's the thing, though, is that actually, uh, people are entitled to a nice quiet workspace. [SPEAKER_02]: So what I would suggest is, you know, you keep doing you, but perhaps maybe some noise cancelling headphones, uh, and, you know, maybe pick a choice of literature that is perhaps a little bit more workplace friendly you understand.

[SPEAKER_02]: I've got a selection of books on the shelf [SPEAKER_02]: any time. [SPEAKER_07]: And Brian gets up and heads out and gives a little nod to the agent, who goes, been retaking notes is very, very interesting. [SPEAKER_07]: And just the last question is, can you tell me one thing that you like about working here and one thing that you think needs improvement?

[SPEAKER_02]: I will say that, you know, one thing that I love about working here is the people. [SPEAKER_02]: And I look outside and outside are just like a group of like stone-faced people who are like tired and just like But dragled and just kind of showed up exhausted. [SPEAKER_02]: I don't like you can see on the faces of everybody here that they are happy to work at the great Chantry and you know what I'm happy to work with them.

[SPEAKER_02]: I feel like I've really built some personal relationships with these people and I'm honored to be a part of it [SPEAKER_02]: If anything was going to change, uh, well, you know what, now that our friend is gone, I will say some of the old firing practices were a little severe. [SPEAKER_02]: Uh, when, when they say get fired, I, they meant it a little literally.

[SPEAKER_02]: I can't tell you how many accountants we've had burned in a pit. [SPEAKER_07]: Uh, so I can love you. [SPEAKER_02]: to avoid things like that. [SPEAKER_02]: And so that's kind of why I'm here. [SPEAKER_02]: I kind of pitched my own job as the Morrell officer to see if I could maybe change some things in the company culture.

[SPEAKER_02]: As well as I've been getting a lot of complaints from Sonya about someone stealing the foreclift. [SPEAKER_02]: And so I would love, I'm not sure who it is, but I'd love to have that investigated, because it's really been eaten Sonya but inside. [SPEAKER_07]: And it's just, you know, it's hard to see your upset.

[SPEAKER_07]: All right, thank you very much for your time. [SPEAKER_07]: I will be on my way. [SPEAKER_02]: All right, are you take care now? [SPEAKER_07]: And the agent heads out of your curtain and leaves your leaves your office. [SPEAKER_07]: Great. [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, yeah. [SPEAKER_07]: Next, we go back to that lead agent who knocks on the door of that corner office that was pointed out to them.

[SPEAKER_02]: Can't believe you tease me with a corner. [SPEAKER_07]: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha [SPEAKER_03]: This is the office of Indica, a siderian paladin who is a celestial being.

[SPEAKER_03]: And you can create that image of just blue, glowing skin, pitch black guys rainbow hair. [SPEAKER_03]: We're in a, like, a felon suit with the chain mail under the suit in case of emergencies. [SPEAKER_03]: I think Indica's just talking, like, wait, is the dock crew ready here? [SPEAKER_03]: Yes.

[SPEAKER_03]: Okay, is talking straight into the camera and it's like, yeah, my mom's Balsara and she knows she loves me a lot, obviously I've been working here for like, [SPEAKER_03]: 250 years. [SPEAKER_03]: It's been a really great job. [SPEAKER_03]: I think I've been a really good job. [SPEAKER_03]: But my siblings, they're like 250 of them.

[SPEAKER_03]: But the ones that are the most knowing are definitely laser, crazier, crazier, and dug. [SPEAKER_03]: And I really hate dug. [SPEAKER_03]: That guy's the worst. [SPEAKER_03]: I hope that he lives a terrible, long life that is painful. [SPEAKER_03]: Because that would be too sweet for him.

[SPEAKER_03]: Wow, and I hate Doug, but this is the best office. [SPEAKER_03]: I love working here. [SPEAKER_03]: I think everyone loves me personally We're like a big happy family. [SPEAKER_03]: Nobody ever fights. [SPEAKER_03]: It's pretty great. [SPEAKER_03]: I always take a the Brian kid He borrows all my smart audio books, which is really cool.

[SPEAKER_03]: And then as I think the goblin walks in, indica goes, oh, sweet, my go goblin's here. [SPEAKER_03]: And then hands, then a package, and with a lighter. [SPEAKER_03]: And he's like, hey, all right, cool. [SPEAKER_03]: Here's the edges of the liver's too. [SPEAKER_03]: It's for Doug and make sure it's Doug.

[SPEAKER_03]: And once you give it to him, make sure you light it on fire. [SPEAKER_03]: I did sh**in' that bag to give to him. [SPEAKER_03]: So thanks, here's your tip. [SPEAKER_03]: And I'll catch you later. [SPEAKER_03]: Bye. [SPEAKER_07]: The lead agent pushes up their glasses, puts the box in light or down, and says, So I am not your go goblin.

[SPEAKER_07]: I will not go for you. [SPEAKER_07]: That's it. [SPEAKER_07]: Kit, can I ask you a question? [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, yeah, yeah, what's up, Mr. Goblin? [SPEAKER_07]: When I was out there, I asked for a manager, and some of the employees kind of chuckled and pointed me in your direction, and that seems kind of a little unusual for a manager or someone of a supervisor status.

[SPEAKER_07]: What exactly do you do here? [SPEAKER_03]: I make sure the vibes are immaculate. [SPEAKER_03]: I make sure the work is happening. [SPEAKER_03]: I make sure we all feel comfortable to do our jobs well. [SPEAKER_03]: The one making sure the apocalypse is really going down. [SPEAKER_03]: Everyone of your kind of just listens to my authority and you just get stuff done.

[SPEAKER_03]: Also, they laugh because I bring such a good time to the office. [SPEAKER_03]: You hear at that moment, you hear like the background, just laugh kind of like the other employees. [SPEAKER_03]: See, they're all having a good time, everyone loves working here. [SPEAKER_03]: Listen, we can go talk to some folks and they'll tell you for sure that it's there's no there's no oh you should talk to Derek he loves me.

[SPEAKER_03]: He loves working here who who is Derek? [SPEAKER_03]: Derek is, and you see Indica like, poke, poke, poke, poke his head out to see, look for Robin's character. [SPEAKER_03]: I don't, I don't see them anywhere, but they're, they love the job, they, wow. [SPEAKER_03]: Let's, if you want to talk about someone doing a phenomenal job, this person is crushing it.

[SPEAKER_03]: Okay, and I think that's because of how I manage them. [SPEAKER_03]: It is a testament to my management of how good they're doing. [SPEAKER_03]: And in fact, everything good happening here because I'm a interesting, interesting. [SPEAKER_03]: So do you have like a brother or something to get my package?

[SPEAKER_07]: Also interesting, no. [SPEAKER_03]: I do not, sister maybe? [SPEAKER_03]: No. [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, oh look, there's no problem over there. [SPEAKER_03]: Hey, goblin, and I run to that goblin. [SPEAKER_03]: That is one of my agents. [SPEAKER_03]: That's one of my, [SPEAKER_07]: At this moment, the lead agent exits your office as you run away, kind of following you when Robin, your character, returns to their desk that is outside into his office.

[SPEAKER_07]: Who are you playing? [SPEAKER_07]: And what does their desk space look like? [SPEAKER_07]: So, Bethlehem, you. [SPEAKER_04]: Ah, no. [SPEAKER_02]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_02]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_02]: It's not that easy. [UNKNOWN]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_02]: It's not that easy.

[SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy.

[SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy.

[SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: It's not that easy. [SPEAKER_05]: A pack to probably Balsara, but also maybe just satan hundreds of years ago for some form of power, and now has like gone full like infernal demon. [SPEAKER_05]: They have a lot of tiny horns kind of formed into a slick backed like hairstyle.

[SPEAKER_05]: They're wearing a very well maintained suit. [SPEAKER_05]: a well, no, clean shaven, no beard. [SPEAKER_05]: Walking with small circles, spectacles. [SPEAKER_05]: Oh, hi. [SPEAKER_05]: I'm so sorry. [SPEAKER_05]: If Doug has like lashed out or complained about you, I apologize. [SPEAKER_05]: Uh, you know, we all know that it's Indica.

[SPEAKER_05]: Um, and just you don't have to like the poop. [SPEAKER_05]: I get it's fire. [SPEAKER_05]: You could just leave it with me. [SPEAKER_05]: I'll make sure it gets back to him. [SPEAKER_05]: And by back to him, I mean, Indica. [SPEAKER_05]: No, Doug, not yes, yes, thank you. [SPEAKER_07]: I was not I was not going to be bringing that anywhere, so it is yes I know no one is.

[SPEAKER_03]: Yes, thank you. [SPEAKER_03]: Oh, oh, thank you. [SPEAKER_04]: I've been this box 300 years ago Don't you have never received once [SPEAKER_07]: It's not what Intigo was saying it sounds like you might be more involved in the day-to-day operation than they are despite your title. [SPEAKER_07]: Does that sound right?

[SPEAKER_07]: Oh, sorry, who are you? [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, sorry. [SPEAKER_07]: I am the lead agent for the Department of Interplaner Corporate Health and Safety. [SPEAKER_05]: Hi. [SPEAKER_05]: I didn't realize I thought you were another Gogoblin. [UNKNOWN]: Great. [SPEAKER_05]: I have a fine, hi, welcome in.

[SPEAKER_05]: Everyone feel free to come have a seat. [SPEAKER_05]: You have everything, everything is fine, you'll visit has been good so far. [SPEAKER_07]: So far, yes, I haven't heard back from my agency up, but so far everything seems to be good, especially now that I know that the poop does not get delivered.

[SPEAKER_05]: Well, not all the time, but sometimes you have to let some through just the company morale. [SPEAKER_02]: Don't put that on me. [SPEAKER_02]: Interesting. [SPEAKER_02]: That's nothing to do with the chief morale officer. [SPEAKER_05]: It's so kind of you to say that I do a lot of work, that's a very, it's just a wonderful thing for someone to say, some people may say that, but who actually knows, honestly.

[SPEAKER_07]: I would hope a lot of people know if it's you who is actually doing the work. [SPEAKER_05]: You would hope, no, it's all Indica, Indica does, everything is so. [SPEAKER_05]: Good. [SPEAKER_05]: Good. [SPEAKER_05]: Good. [SPEAKER_05]: Good. [SPEAKER_05]: And just really, we have just, we're in such high spirits, the apocalypse is just rather corner.

[SPEAKER_05]: And it's all going to, it's all going to kick off where, where, where hoping this is going to be our best quarter yet, we're hoping deaths in the trillions. [SPEAKER_05]: We've got our fingers crossed, but we're hoping for a lot of possessions. [SPEAKER_05]: It's really going to be, it's going to be a really good year for us, I think.

[SPEAKER_07]: Do you have anything on you or maybe on your desk that shows that your patron could be Boslora? [SPEAKER_05]: So there's the computer and the next of that computer is like an old dark tone, a big thick rim wall that is flipping its own pages and if you stare it too long it begins to speak to you and it will never stop speaking to you.

[SPEAKER_05]: it's they're flicking through its own pages and kind of writing down essentially a task list but then you notice that it simply does not stop writing and it's just updating consistently every few seconds with a new minor task and then it's it will like [SPEAKER_05]: Whilst speaking to the documentary crew, Bethlehem will be typing, would like hit an end to key, and then the book will scroll back 50 pages and then strike one thing and then flip 51 pages since the tasks have increased since there.

[SPEAKER_07]: Since it was there. [SPEAKER_07]: The lead agent looks at your grimoire of tasks and says, do you find it a conflict of interest or that having the void mother as your patron might create some difficult scenarios with Indica? [SPEAKER_05]: I know how to do my job. [SPEAKER_05]: I know how to do my job to the fullest extent.

[SPEAKER_05]: I have loved my time here with Balsara. [SPEAKER_05]: I'm loving my time in the apocalypse. [SPEAKER_05]: I might be moving departments if this apocalypse goes well. [SPEAKER_05]: I've been promised a big nice office and my own team to manage. [SPEAKER_05]: No, there is not necessarily a conflict of interest because [SPEAKER_05]: one apocalypse benefits everyone trying to make an apocalypse happen now I will admit there are a lot of different types of apocalypse is and you can kind of only have an apocalypse once every few thousand years interesting and interesting okay well is there anything that you can tell me that you [SPEAKER_05]: that good work is its own reward and eventually everyone is going to get noticed for the good work they do and I'm really excited for that recognition to come.

[SPEAKER_05]: I'm not saying it doesn't happen now. [SPEAKER_05]: I think everyone here is really good and I am just honored to be a part of the team. [SPEAKER_05]: the family as indica called it and you don't want it's great and I like it and it's good really excited for the apocalypse go voids uh we're gonna it's gonna be a nice it's gonna be a nice and nice time I think well Bartholomew thank you for your cooperation you have been a great help it's an honor thank you [SPEAKER_07]: and they wink as they leave.

[SPEAKER_07]: Oh, next, one of the agents makes their way down, several flights of stairs to the warehouse. [SPEAKER_07]: A massive underground structure containing anything and everything the great-chantry might need. [SPEAKER_07]: Weapons, magic items, uniforms, printer paper, anything. [SPEAKER_07]: As they walk in, they see two signs.

[SPEAKER_07]: One reads, 36,472 days since our last accident. [SPEAKER_07]: And the other one reads, three days since our last accident caused by Indica. [SPEAKER_07]: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

[SPEAKER_06]: Okay, yeah, I'm playing Sonia Grimmhart. [SPEAKER_06]: She is a dwarven mechonist in terms of class. [SPEAKER_06]: She is the warehouse foreman and [SPEAKER_06]: Looks over, and then continues driving. [SPEAKER_06]: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

[SPEAKER_06]: Okay, well, that's good. [SPEAKER_06]: I thought the corporate ratted go gobbling to me again. [SPEAKER_06]: No, I Have a very serious job Don't Sown you aside since says don't we all [SPEAKER_06]: All right, upstairs, they know about the surprise inspection. [SPEAKER_06]: Oh, yes. [SPEAKER_06]: We went in the front door.

[SPEAKER_06]: She turns around, Shows. [SPEAKER_06]: All right, boys, 15 minute break on the company. [SPEAKER_06]: All the way. [SPEAKER_06]: All the warehouse guys just stop what they're doing in the middle of their task and just shut the law. [SPEAKER_07]: Do you mind if I ask you a couple questions?

[SPEAKER_06]: Is this part of the inspection? [SPEAKER_06]: Absolutely. [SPEAKER_06]: I mean, I've already taken my union mandated lunch break, so anything past this is uh, is a bonus. [SPEAKER_06]: Go ahead. [SPEAKER_07]: Take some notes on that statement and what's I noticed that there are two kind of accident signs here.

[SPEAKER_07]: What's what's the deal with that? [SPEAKER_07]: An accident is an accident no matter who causes it. [SPEAKER_06]: You know, one could say that, however, the boys were getting very discouraged at the amount of resets that were happening on the big calendar. [SPEAKER_06]: So we had to compromise and make an addendum.

[SPEAKER_06]: As you can tell, it has been what three days. [SPEAKER_06]: I believe that one last said since a big boy came on down to the warehouse. [SPEAKER_03]: cut to security footage, and you see everyone is like on a break, and Sonia diligently looks around, I have several hiding spots that Sonia is aware of, and looks through those hiding spots.

[SPEAKER_03]: And then there's another worker sweeping and Sony looks to the worker and gives a thumbs up and then walks off. [SPEAKER_03]: And then you see, you see, the worker looks up, looks at the security camera, gives a thumbs up, takes off a mustache and it was just indica the entire time where you get a form.

[SPEAKER_03]: Quickly runs into a forklift, puts like hits the gears, is that's like drive forward. [SPEAKER_03]: It's in reverse, goes backwards, knocks over all of the like the plateau towers down, it like cascades down like a little like a little like dominoes going down the entire thing. [SPEAKER_03]: Looks back, looks, looks to Sonya shrugs and then just walks upstairs and then goes, you guys to clean this all up before the end of the day.

[SPEAKER_06]: one of these days. [SPEAKER_06]: One of these days. [SPEAKER_07]: You got any other questions? [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, are there any particularly dangerous items or substances that are being held in the warehouse? [SPEAKER_07]: And if there are, could you show them to me and how they are being stored?

[SPEAKER_06]: All right, I can show them to you, but you're going to have to wear protective, protective goggles. [SPEAKER_06]: The head said, all that. [SPEAKER_06]: I would love to. [SPEAKER_06]: Sure, we got [SPEAKER_06]: But she points to a shelf in which a large crate is like humming ominously. [SPEAKER_06]: And she says, that's the demon engine of El Graf.

[SPEAKER_06]: You're really gonna wanna take a step back. [SPEAKER_06]: There's only three people in the nation who are licensed to work on one of those. [SPEAKER_06]: And one of them just got his arms blown off last month. [SPEAKER_06]: So we're down to two and a half. [SPEAKER_06]: Oh, wow, interesting.

[SPEAKER_06]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_06]: All right, you see that down there? [SPEAKER_06]: She points and there's like a large warhammer. [SPEAKER_06]: That's just hovering, not even on a shelf, just like over the warehouse. [SPEAKER_06]: as she says, that's the warhammer of Gideon. [SPEAKER_06]: Don't let it see you.

[SPEAKER_06]: Oh. [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_06]: Well, interesting. [SPEAKER_06]: That one got tampered with, and now we can't get it down. [SPEAKER_04]: Hmm. [SPEAKER_06]: That was exactly six days ago. [SPEAKER_06]: The previous time, the calendar got reset. [SPEAKER_06]: Hmm. [SPEAKER_06]: Hmm.

[SPEAKER_06]: Hmm. [SPEAKER_06]: Hmm. [SPEAKER_06]: Anything else? [SPEAKER_07]: Um, the last thing is just could you show me your warehouse health and safety documents. [SPEAKER_07]: I just need to make sure that they're all up to date. [SPEAKER_06]: Right. [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_06]: Uh, sure.

[SPEAKER_06]: I got the all the manuals over here. [SPEAKER_06]: She steps into her little office. [SPEAKER_06]: Uh, you see it's sort of a, it's, it's like a warehouse shared office that's like part office part break room. [SPEAKER_06]: And so all of the warehouse guys are just in here talking. [SPEAKER_06]: As she says, all right, boys, best behavior.

[SPEAKER_06]: And she goes over and takes this massive, like, OSHA manual slams it down onto the desk. [SPEAKER_06]: It's like black leather bound. [SPEAKER_06]: There's like a demon eye flittering back and forth on it. [SPEAKER_06]: And she says, alright, just as OSHA mandated. [SPEAKER_07]: Um, I think you mean the Department of Interplaner Corporal Health Safety, not Oh, you're so right.

[SPEAKER_06]: You're so right. [SPEAKER_06]: Just as the Department of Intergalactic Interplaner Interplaner Safety, recommend. [SPEAKER_06]: for shit. [SPEAKER_02]: It's D.I.HS, I believe. [SPEAKER_07]: Is that D.I.C.HS, actually? [SPEAKER_02]: D.I.C.HS, isn't D.X? [SPEAKER_02]: It is D.X. [SPEAKER_06]: Nice.

[SPEAKER_02]: Good. [SPEAKER_06]: Just as the Dick Boys recommend. [SPEAKER_05]: If I can, I think there's like a knock at the door. [SPEAKER_05]: And Bethlehem is on the other end. [SPEAKER_05]: There's no tasks being crossed off the manual. [SPEAKER_05]: Uh, are you going to be staying lights on you or is this another, uh, another, what are your fun little jokes that you're playing on me?

[SPEAKER_06]: Oh, well, I was just showing the show in the gentleman here some hospitality, but you know what, we'll get right on that. [SPEAKER_05]: It did, or did everyone join in on the hospitality, because I noticed that there's not a single worker on the floor at the minute. [SPEAKER_06]: Oh, well, I mean, listen, if you a corporate fellas would keep the safety boys off my back, then maybe we'd have time to organize the warehouse.

[SPEAKER_05]: do you think it's safer with nobody in the warehouse whilst the world's most annoying idiot is upstairs and is literally looking at pictures of the the best ways to destroy warehouses with trucks monthly. [SPEAKER_04]: That's the best way to destroy where it has to be crushed. [SPEAKER_05]: It's a month later.

[SPEAKER_05]: It's a month later. [SPEAKER_05]: And also, do you know how hard it is to write a full monthly magazine? [SPEAKER_05]: It's a very sad topic. [SPEAKER_04]: That's all written by the guy who said there is a special magazine and there's the only thing that stays the coming down here and just so many people then.

[SPEAKER_06]: Sonya Strosher must ask for a second as this actually is a good point. [SPEAKER_06]: As she says. [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah, well, you know what, as she turns to the safety inspector and says, Barty there's got a point, I better actually get back out on the floor, make sure a boss man doesn't come down here and mess anything else up.

[SPEAKER_06]: Thanks for the reminder, Bart. [SPEAKER_06]: All right, it's both all of you. [SPEAKER_05]: Thank you. [SPEAKER_05]: We are not even colleagues. [SPEAKER_05]: So, don't make things out. [SPEAKER_06]: Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah, yeah, yeah, what would you, what would you do, Ladyfavor?

[SPEAKER_06]: If you see a sort of a rat shaped lack of person in a suit coming on down this way, would you just do me, do me and everybody else a favor and just sort of steer him on back upstairs where he belongs? [SPEAKER_06]: I will not. [SPEAKER_06]: Thank you. [SPEAKER_03]: I think as you say that, you see a rat shaped like a person driving your four-clifed past though.

[SPEAKER_07]: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, [SPEAKER_07]: then they all turn and walk out the door.

[SPEAKER_03]: That's so dumb, that's incredible. [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you, you have a great breast of your day, too, all right. [SPEAKER_02]: You take care now, all right. [SPEAKER_02]: Bye-bye, and I like wave goodbye to every individual goblin as they go out the door. [SPEAKER_02]: There's over 20, yeah.

[SPEAKER_02]: And I shake all of their hands. [SPEAKER_02]: And then like 21 in, I give them a little buzz. [SPEAKER_02]: Gotcha. [SPEAKER_06]: So how was the inspection for you? [SPEAKER_03]: There was an inspection? [SPEAKER_06]: I think you just see the warehouse team on the security feed just writing an up-ended shelf and starting to put all of the crates back on it.

[SPEAKER_05]: I'm not gonna get too political, but I do think that we should start flaying people again. [SPEAKER_05]: I think if we don't like our buses, we should be able to [SPEAKER_05]: and slowly and also deliciously. [SPEAKER_05]: P********* They're skin. [SPEAKER_05]: Whilst they beg for Massey and we say, no ****!

[SPEAKER_05]: You lost Massey, 50 years ago. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm just really glad everybody's so happy to be here. [SPEAKER_07]: Several months past and everyone at the Great Chantry is working diligently to bring the irrevocable apocalypse. [SPEAKER_07]: It's Monday morning, and Merrick, you arrived to your office to see a wax seal letter sitting on your desk.

[SPEAKER_02]: Marek walks into their office, just sipping on green tea because they gave up coffee a little while ago. [SPEAKER_02]: And they're sipping from a mug that very special mug that says best regional associate director if humanoid resources slash morale officer. [SPEAKER_02]: Which is their spellcasting focus.

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, they're kind of gently sipping from this like herbal, green tea out of the special mug of it, one of their, haha, haha, that they made for themselves on the internet, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha, haha,

[SPEAKER_07]: You would do me a great service if you could check in on that, maybe give them one of your rousing pep talks, in nothingness, void mother, boss, Lara, the sweet. [SPEAKER_02]: Oh yeah, that's uh, that's gonna be a tough one. [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, right, another glass of herbal tea for me today.

[SPEAKER_02]: You got this merit, and Merrick snaps their suspenders and walks out of their office. [SPEAKER_02]: Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha [SPEAKER_05]: Let's go with what I, my, like, least favorite thing, which is Rose Flavoured, like, licorice.

[SPEAKER_05]: The two of the worst things I could think of. [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, that's devastating. [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, great. [SPEAKER_02]: I sent her on over to Bartholomew with my hands free. [SPEAKER_02]: And I say, Bartholomew, how are you doing today? [SPEAKER_02]: How's it going? [SPEAKER_05]: Hi, Mary.

[SPEAKER_05]: Are you here to do some actual work? [SPEAKER_05]: You ready to get like actually, you know, become useful in the workplace, or are you still gonna be? [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, you know what? [SPEAKER_02]: That's, you're always such a joker here. [SPEAKER_02]: I've got something for you. [SPEAKER_02]: And I look at my ones, leave and say, oh, nothing in my left.

[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, you look like you've got something behind your ear. [SPEAKER_02]: And I pull out a bouquet of rose flavored licorice. [SPEAKER_02]: Say, [SPEAKER_05]: God I brought this for you as you're reaching I thought I'm used like I swear to God people something behind my hair I'm gonna freak out And say I couldn't help but I just hey I found it there.

[SPEAKER_02]: I had to get it out otherwise it'd be a hell of a thing to try to clean up with a cute tip You know what why are you here? [SPEAKER_02]: Well, I wanted to check in. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm here on, you know, in my capacity as, as Moral officer. [SPEAKER_02]: I heard a little birdie told me from upstairs, a little void birdie, if you will, that you might be having a little bit of trouble with some of the other staff members, particularly some of the higher ups and middle management.

[SPEAKER_02]: So I just wanted to check in with you to see how you're doing. [SPEAKER_02]: feeling did you get the blood pressure monitor that we sent to you because I know that that was something that we had flagged might be important for you. [SPEAKER_05]: Yes, my blood pressure is at an all-time high exactly what it should be.

[SPEAKER_05]: I'm working at full capacity. [SPEAKER_02]: Right. [SPEAKER_02]: No, so I saw that you were at a two thirteen over 105 and I do think you should legally be dead. [SPEAKER_02]: at those numbers. [SPEAKER_02]: So I'm just kind of trying to wrap my head around what we can do to help you. [SPEAKER_05]: Well, every single time we talk, my blood pressure goes up, my little bit, so here's open.

[SPEAKER_05]: Oh, yeah. [SPEAKER_05]: Oh, yo, you're right. [SPEAKER_05]: That's now it's 2.30 now. [SPEAKER_05]: Wow. [SPEAKER_05]: Okay. [SPEAKER_05]: So upstairs, who upstairs has said that I have a problem with the higher ups of the office? [SPEAKER_02]: I'm not technically at liberty to discuss this, but my hands are tied.

[SPEAKER_02]: The void mother herself mentioned it. [SPEAKER_02]: I think, you know, she did put that brainworm in a while ago, and so I think she kind of knows a lot of the thoughts and feelings that you're having, and sometimes she lets me in on them, just to make sure that I can make sure that you're okay.

[SPEAKER_02]: So if there's ever an eerie sense, like I know exactly what's going on in your mind, sometimes I do. [SPEAKER_05]: Well, hopefully the things that you can sense that is going on in my mind when I speak to certain people won't get me sent to HR. [SPEAKER_05]: But if I get fired, at least I don't die.

[SPEAKER_02]: I, uh, well, the good news is I'm already HR and I'm not here to report you. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm just here to make sure that you're doing okay. [SPEAKER_05]: I'm fine. [SPEAKER_05]: Right. [SPEAKER_05]: I would. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm gonna roll it inside, check. [SPEAKER_02]: Well, we're playing a game, I'll roll it back.

[SPEAKER_02]: Go for it, yeah. [SPEAKER_02]: First roll. [SPEAKER_02]: That's a roll, baby. [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_02]: That is an 18. [SPEAKER_05]: Would you like me to roll against? [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, go ahead and roll deception. [SPEAKER_07]: Go ahead and roll deception if you want. [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_07]: Damn it, 17. [SPEAKER_02]: Damn it. [SPEAKER_05]: Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah [SPEAKER_03]: Indico walks walks behind there and goes, hey, Derek, can you give me that report defining one of the apocalypse is again?

[SPEAKER_03]: I lost the last one you did for me. [SPEAKER_05]: So sorry. [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, baby, I'm fine. [SPEAKER_02]: Right, see, so as you said that, it just climbed up again to 250. [SPEAKER_02]: And so I just want to make sure because you are one of our most valued employees that you make it through to the end of this apocalyptic.

[SPEAKER_02]: So here's what I've done for you. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm sure you're gonna love this. [SPEAKER_02]: I've arranged for some other folks in the office some really competent people to take over the rest of your tasks for the day so that you can take half a day off. [SPEAKER_02]: How many employees do we have?

[SPEAKER_05]: If they decide to pick up and come do mine, are you hiring 200 people to do all the tasks that I'm going to be doing in the day? [SPEAKER_05]: Are they all going to work to midnight? [SPEAKER_05]: Just like I do, and then they're going to come in at one am after a really good one hour nap.

[SPEAKER_02]: Well, the thing is, you are doing all of that on your own volition, Bartholomew. [SPEAKER_02]: And at the end of the day, we really only need you here until six. [SPEAKER_02]: And so the other employees, there are six of them. [SPEAKER_02]: They will be working until six Brian might work till six 30 or so.

[SPEAKER_02]: He's at a really good part in the book I hear. [SPEAKER_02]: So he's just going to take an extra 30. [SPEAKER_02]: during lunch and then just put a little bit of overtime, but besides Brian, everyone should basically just be here till six and everything else can wait till tomorrow. [SPEAKER_05]: Oh my god, it's so kind.

[SPEAKER_05]: Sounds like you think I don't know how to delegate. [SPEAKER_05]: I just want to let you know that I delegate all the time. [SPEAKER_05]: Um, it's no huge problem that people don't do the work that I'm delegating them and then I have to do the work. [SPEAKER_05]: We are in crunch season, folks.

[SPEAKER_05]: It is time to lock in and get this apocalypse a moving. [SPEAKER_05]: People aren't doing it. [SPEAKER_05]: I need, I, why ask someone who is a stupid baby who is here because their mother is the greatest thing that's ever existed. [SPEAKER_02]: Um, are you referring to someone specific?

[SPEAKER_05]: Oh, I'm talking about so many people. [SPEAKER_05]: Laser, tracer, quaser, dug, they all suck. [SPEAKER_05]: And they are all right. [SPEAKER_05]: Also, never-wise, and I hate all of them individually. [SPEAKER_02]: Well, Doug did promise to get through the rest of your workload today as long as Indica would promise not to f**k in another bag.

[SPEAKER_02]: So, I think you should just go home. [SPEAKER_02]: In fact, a company mandated [SPEAKER_02]: I'm sorry, but you have to go home. [SPEAKER_07]: At this point, we're going to cut into Indicous Office as they just walked past that previous conversation to where they also see a wax sealed letter on their desk.

[SPEAKER_03]: Oh, right. [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, it looks like mommy sent me something. [SPEAKER_03]: and what she has to say to her favorite little kid. [SPEAKER_07]: My child, Kell Belleth, has personally requested your aid in obtaining the grimoire of the eldest from the warehouse. [SPEAKER_07]: Once retrieved, please leave it with the front desk, who will send it out to Miss Belleth.

[SPEAKER_07]: Do not disappoint me again. [SPEAKER_03]: Nothing, this is how she says she loves me. [SPEAKER_03]: Well, all right, cool, sounds like I got to go take a grim war, grim, uh, let me go get Brian, help me go talk to Sonya, grimoire, grimoire, grimoire, grimoire, grimoire, grimoire, Brian's literate, brimoire, brimoire, brimoire, brimoire, brimoire, brimoire, brimoire, brimoire, brimoire, brimoire, [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, that's mean, Grimoire.

[SPEAKER_07]: I just like a big book. [SPEAKER_07]: It's usually kind of like has like a bad vibe to it, which is like a good vibe, but you know? [SPEAKER_03]: Okay, cool. [SPEAKER_03]: Kind of read it. [SPEAKER_03]: Come with me and we're gonna go get this book from Sonya. [SPEAKER_07]: Let's do it.

[SPEAKER_07]: This was not a character I had planned, but great. [SPEAKER_07]: Indicone Ryan, you walk out and as you leave, you see Merrick and Brotholomew wrapping up their conversation. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm not legally. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm not saying I can't tell you where you have to go. [SPEAKER_02]: So technically I suppose if you wanted to stay here, we can't kick you out.

[SPEAKER_02]: But legally, you do have to stop working for us now. [SPEAKER_03]: Hey, Derek. [SPEAKER_03]: Hey, Mary. [SPEAKER_03]: Well, your name's Ryan. [SPEAKER_03]: You guys must be related. [SPEAKER_05]: Oh, we have fun here. [SPEAKER_03]: We're going to go steal a grandma, Brian knows the word.

[SPEAKER_03]: We're going to go take something from the warehouse. [SPEAKER_02]: Well, well, well, well, Indica, remember the warehouse. [SPEAKER_02]: Sonya has expressly said that she does not want you in the warehouse again. [SPEAKER_03]: Oh, Merrick, Merrick, Merrick, Merrick. [SPEAKER_03]: This is awesome.

[SPEAKER_03]: It's great that you're here. [SPEAKER_02]: And that's great that you're here. [SPEAKER_03]: Indica keeps walking with Brian and then as like Indica walks with Brian goes it's nice We let that sick kid work here. [SPEAKER_03]: We must be having so much fun [SPEAKER_02]: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

[SPEAKER_02]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_02]: This is cronious, most hired or through every scene. [SPEAKER_07]: Great. [SPEAKER_07]: Brian. [SPEAKER_07]: I didn't take a head down to the warehouse. [SPEAKER_07]: To your follow. [SPEAKER_02]: Uh, yeah, actually, um, actually, uh, Bartholomew, you are technically off the clock.

[SPEAKER_02]: Uh, uh, uh, I do need to follow in to come down there to make sure that, uh, that he does not drive the forklift. [SPEAKER_02]: I've been expressly informed that I need to do that. [SPEAKER_02]: So I will, I will follow behind. [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, and sure that you technically are off of the day.

[SPEAKER_02]: I guess, uh, I made up, but you can follow us for sure. [SPEAKER_02]: If you still have a compulsion to be here. [SPEAKER_05]: I think what the whole movie is like as America's working out is sitting back down at her desk, and then is like F*** should probably go [SPEAKER_07]: The four of y'all make your way down to the warehouse.

[SPEAKER_07]: You open the doors where you are greeted by Sonia, wondering who the hell is coming into her warehouse? [SPEAKER_06]: Sonia opens the door, size, and closes it. [SPEAKER_02]: And I tried to tell him that he couldn't come in. [SPEAKER_06]: She turns to another guy, tosses the keys and says, get it out of here.

[SPEAKER_04]: You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being You're just here being [SPEAKER_03]: We need a grimoire.

[SPEAKER_06]: You need a grimoire from here. [SPEAKER_03]: Yes, it's a book, right, Brian? [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah, it's a big book. [SPEAKER_06]: Right, I'm just going to skip the part where I ask if you've got the necessary paperwork to check it out. [SPEAKER_03]: Oh yeah, totally, it's my mom, my mom, my me.

[SPEAKER_06]: I'm sorry, Bolslara asked you to come get it? [SPEAKER_06]: Yep. [SPEAKER_06]: Sonya size as this is so far beyond her pay grade and then shrugs and says, why not? [SPEAKER_06]: Everybody, come on in. [SPEAKER_06]: Where else fellas? [SPEAKER_06]: You ain't working but you ain't off. [SPEAKER_06]: Stand by.

[SPEAKER_06]: May need you. [SPEAKER_06]: And then begins walking down and says, All right, which, which Grim War? [SPEAKER_03]: Indico opens it, opens letter and looks at it goes, Why don't you just give me, both of them. [SPEAKER_06]: It's on you takes the letter from you and reads it and goes, okay.

[SPEAKER_02]: Mary, Mary, it goes, all of the grimoires in this place, that's going to be a lot of heavy lifting, it would almost take it, oh no. [SPEAKER_06]: That's crazy, we got... [SPEAKER_06]: We got rid of that anyway. [SPEAKER_02]: We won We'll take a fourth lift to get it out of here. [SPEAKER_06]: Nope.

[SPEAKER_06]: Nope. [SPEAKER_06]: Anyway. [SPEAKER_06]: All right, that's gonna be section 58 F. All right, everybody. [SPEAKER_06]: Come along [SPEAKER_07]: Great, you lead everybody back to the section 58F where the grimoires are kept. [SPEAKER_07]: This one in particular is a very magical, very powerful magical object, so it's kept in a sealed kind of anti-magic box to make sure nothing comes out.

[SPEAKER_07]: And it's kind of high up on one of these shelves. [SPEAKER_07]: You know, this is a massive space. [SPEAKER_06]: how big is the anti magic box why i'm doing my best to decide whether this is a latter job oh yes far less damage you can do with a latter could be a latter job yes so sonic under her breath goes thanks the gods and since somebody for a latter [SPEAKER_05]: I'll be in Bryan can go do that.

[SPEAKER_05]: I'm not supposed to be technically working anyway. [SPEAKER_05]: And then I'm gonna go immediately home after I get the ladder. [SPEAKER_05]: I'm sure you are. [SPEAKER_05]: I walk out with Bryan and then we get the ladder and then out of view of everyone else both of them you turn's like, Bryan, if you don't go home right now, I'm going to skin you alive.

[SPEAKER_05]: I'm gonna eat you. [SPEAKER_05]: We didn't go home right now and he's gonna go home right now. [SPEAKER_05]: You know? [SPEAKER_05]: Good bye. [SPEAKER_05]: If anyone asks you we're here and then when when the chance back around is like what I'm gonna get to sky Self and I'm just gonna pretend to be him So I'm gonna fake do it.

[SPEAKER_02]: So I can do work and pretend I'm not [SPEAKER_02]: Did you go out of eye shot of that as well? [SPEAKER_05]: Yes, I would have, yeah. [SPEAKER_02]: OK. [SPEAKER_02]: I had a thing I was going to use. [SPEAKER_05]: But also I didn't technically have a worm in my brain that is directly that you have direct contact with.

[SPEAKER_05]: So you can tell this is me, but you have no proof. [SPEAKER_02]: No, I think the worm is controlled by Bustlara, I think, and so Bustlara can choose to inform me of stuff. [SPEAKER_02]: I don't think I know what's going on at all times. [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I can't just make up that I know all of your thoughts, that's crazy.

[SPEAKER_05]: I can't say to myself, that sounds fun, and then I walk in with the ladder, looking exactly like Brian. [SPEAKER_04]: Hey, Harry, I got the ladder. [SPEAKER_02]: That's the 22. [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, you know, this is not Brian. [SPEAKER_04]: Hey, guys. [SPEAKER_02]: Hey, Brian, thank you, Brian.

[SPEAKER_05]: Hey, he lives on the, hey, is anyone listening to porn work recently? [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I did. [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, that's so good. [SPEAKER_02]: Love that. [SPEAKER_02]: It's really good. [SPEAKER_02]: We cannot say that out loud. [SPEAKER_02]: What is the warehouse guy race? [UNKNOWN]: Yeah.

[UNKNOWN]: All right, Craig. [SPEAKER_06]: Sonya, Sonya completely buys that this is Brian, because she's like, yeah, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all of the, all [SPEAKER_06]: She just sets up the ladder and goes, yep, and then there's climbing.

[SPEAKER_07]: You're going, you grab the box that the Grimmar is in. [SPEAKER_07]: Bring it down, and you all start to head back to the entrance when you start to hear the creaking and groaning of metal. [SPEAKER_07]: Suddenly a box falls and shatters next to you. [SPEAKER_07]: The shelf, you just took the grimoire from, starts to fall into the shelving next to it, which falls into the shelf's next to that, which falls into the shelf's next to that, leading to an avalanche of shelving.

[SPEAKER_07]: And I need you all to roll initiative. [SPEAKER_07]: to make sure you don't get caught. [UNKNOWN]: Oh! [UNKNOWN]: Oh no! [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, you did that? [SPEAKER_07]: So thank you for getting Brian out of there because I didn't want to have to figure that out. [SPEAKER_06]: Turns out this was the load-bearing grim war.

[SPEAKER_06]: So let me know what you get. [SPEAKER_05]: Or team. [SPEAKER_02]: 22. [SPEAKER_05]: Okay. [SPEAKER_05]: 17. [SPEAKER_05]: Oh, I also got 17. [SPEAKER_05]: Oh, who's Dex's higher? [SPEAKER_05]: I have zero Dex. [SPEAKER_05]: I have plus two. [SPEAKER_05]: So what if we were to say Brian was a class?

[SPEAKER_05]: Well, classed and saved Ryan was. [SPEAKER_05]: Honestly, maybe you're rogue. [SPEAKER_07]: Okay, I can pretend to be a rogue. [SPEAKER_07]: Easy. [SPEAKER_07]: So how this is going to work is it will take four rounds for all of you to get back to the entrance of the warehouse, and each round will have a new obstacle for you to get past.

[SPEAKER_07]: And we're going to assume that even if you cast a spell or use some sort of ability, or even if you fail a check or a save on the obstacle, [SPEAKER_07]: you will continue to make progress towards the entrance. [SPEAKER_07]: The one exception to that is if you fail an ability check or saving throw twice in a row, in which case you will become trapped under the falling shelves.

[SPEAKER_07]: And on each turns, you'll have your normal action bonus action reaction, you know, the action economy movement won't really matter. [SPEAKER_07]: You can also, like, if it happens, you can use your, like a spell or an ability odd help someone else, you know, to give them, to try to help them or to help yourself.

[SPEAKER_07]: The one exception to that, weirdly enough, is the help action. [SPEAKER_07]: If you take the help action to give someone else advantage, you will do your check with disadvantage. [SPEAKER_07]: Because you will have to take so much of your energy specifically to do that. [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, no.

[SPEAKER_02]: Does this count as an accident caused by end of cars? [SPEAKER_02]: This is just going to be a full reset. [UNKNOWN]: Mm. [UNKNOWN]: Mm. [SPEAKER_06]: Well, we'd be at to find out the cause. [SPEAKER_03]: Ha ha ha. [SPEAKER_07]: So, as that first shelf starts to fall that the Grimmar was on, knocks into the next shelf and into the next shelf and starts running towards you as the things fall.

[SPEAKER_07]: You all start running? [SPEAKER_06]: No, I just stay in place. [SPEAKER_06]: I'm gonna run. [SPEAKER_06]: Okay, much of my own little personal apocalypse. [SPEAKER_06]: So on yet, thanks for a second, it's like, if I die, I don't have to clean this up. [SPEAKER_06]: And then starts running.

[SPEAKER_07]: As you're running through these shelves, a massive cauldron has fallen over spilling a mysterious liquid in your path. [SPEAKER_02]: How much like area space does this take up? [SPEAKER_07]: Uh, 25 feet. [SPEAKER_02]: 25 at day, I'm all right. [SPEAKER_02]: I have a way to do 10. [SPEAKER_02]: So I have something that for 10 feet that literally just allows me to like move through hazards without a problem.

[SPEAKER_07]: Well, if you use that, all like this is one of those times like if you use that as your ability on your turn, it'll like lower the DC for you to do this or something like that. [SPEAKER_02]: Gotcha. [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, that makes sense. [SPEAKER_07]: So first up, Merrick. [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, I'm gonna start up a bardic performance.

[SPEAKER_02]: And so I think what I'll probably do, I think Merrick clicks their heels together and two little healies drop from there. [SPEAKER_02]: from their little heels and they start sort of heel skating across this thing. [SPEAKER_02]: They're going to use two things. [SPEAKER_02]: They're going to start a barric performance where they just start out like, alright guys, we can do this.

[SPEAKER_02]: We've just got to stay organized and I'm going to use Ode to heroes. [SPEAKER_02]: and everyone will have advantage on dexterity checks. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to say love. [SPEAKER_02]: And then as a bonus action, I will use scurry, which is part of the supplicant background, I believe.

[SPEAKER_02]: Oh, no, that's part of the Orkish background, where Orkish [SPEAKER_02]: what is it lineage? [SPEAKER_02]: Where as a bonus action, I can move 10 feet without provoking opportunity attacks and doesn't trigger traps or hazards even if as long as I know where the hazards are. [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, go ahead and...

[SPEAKER_07]: Uh, and so are you healing through healing? [SPEAKER_02]: I am. [SPEAKER_02]: I am healing through the sludge, and we'll see what happens when I come out of it. [SPEAKER_07]: As you start to roll into the mystery liquid, you get your 10 feet in, but then your your wheels, your healies get caught in this really sticky, sticky, and you need to make a strength check to cross the rest of it.

[SPEAKER_02]: Uh, that's my worst step. [SPEAKER_07]: The DC is slightly lowered because you did heal your way in. [SPEAKER_02]: Alright, with a negative one, that's a 13. [SPEAKER_07]: You, helium start to get caught in it, see the falling books behind you and just start to run through the rest of it and make your way past it.

[SPEAKER_02]: Nice. [SPEAKER_02]: All right, everybody, now you can do it if I do it. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm not that strong. [SPEAKER_02]: All of you can do it. [SPEAKER_02]: You got this. [SPEAKER_02]: Come on, Bartholomew, let's go. [SPEAKER_02]: Um, I'm sorry. [SPEAKER_02]: Come on, come on, Brian, you got this.

[SPEAKER_05]: I don't know, I don't know who that thought of you is. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm so sorry. [SPEAKER_03]: Wait. [SPEAKER_03]: Hold on. [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, kill you. [SPEAKER_03]: It was $4,000. [SPEAKER_02]: No one's worth all of you. [SPEAKER_02]: That is Brian from the smut in the office. [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, Brian the smut.

[SPEAKER_02]: Sonya, you are up next. [SPEAKER_06]: I am going to, uh, take my shard of creation. [SPEAKER_06]: Whoa! [SPEAKER_06]: My mechanistability, I essentially have this little thing that, like, it's sort of this amorphous, like pink, glowing thing that I can transform into an object. [SPEAKER_06]: use an action to transform it into any type of non-magical weapon or shield or any object of medium sized or smaller.

[SPEAKER_06]: I'm going to try and turn it into like a little glider to at least try and get most of the way across the ooze. [SPEAKER_06]: Okay, it starts out as my welder's goggles. [SPEAKER_06]: I like flip my hand in it. [SPEAKER_06]: transforms into sort of glider wings on my back. [SPEAKER_06]: Cool.

[SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, go ahead and give me an athletics check to kind of get the the running to jump. [SPEAKER_06]: I'm not bad at athletics. [SPEAKER_06]: So let's do that. [SPEAKER_06]: Oh, that but that's a bad roll. [SPEAKER_06]: That's that's a two on the dice. [SPEAKER_06]: So six. [SPEAKER_07]: Nice.

[SPEAKER_07]: As you go to run to get the air just to float and glide over this liquid, you don't quite get enough distance to go and so you land about 10 feet short and get a little stuck. [SPEAKER_07]: You do get yourself out. [SPEAKER_07]: Okay. [SPEAKER_07]: But that is one fail that you have. [SPEAKER_07]: So if you fail the next one, I'm dead.

[SPEAKER_07]: you will be trapped underneath the warehouse. [SPEAKER_07]: Underneath my own warehouse. [SPEAKER_07]: Next up, Bartholomew Brian. [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, okay. [SPEAKER_05]: As, as well running, Bartholomew is not and a fit or athletic person is also not built for, [SPEAKER_05]: in any way exciting or combative things happening, but is gonna like grab a mop or like some rags that they are running past and as pretend to be Brian.

[SPEAKER_05]: Hey guys, I'll clear away and then it's gonna like pretend to mock up some of the liquid and I'm gonna cast prestigetation as fuck it's like it can go through it Yeah, look like I'm mopping up, but what is actually happening is all of the pages of my grandma have [SPEAKER_05]: like being torn out and I have formed this like fake mop.

[SPEAKER_05]: That is like mopping with me. [SPEAKER_05]: So if this disguise self wasn't there, it would look like almost like a papercraft mop. [SPEAKER_05]: Mopping things up. [SPEAKER_05]: And then all of the mop would like collapse it on itself and then re-forging to a book again. [SPEAKER_05]: Nice.

[SPEAKER_05]: But right now it just looks like a regular mop. [SPEAKER_03]: I've never seen Brian work before. [SPEAKER_02]: Well, that's never everything! [SPEAKER_02]: Gosh, I'm so glad I didn't go home. [SPEAKER_07]: Go ahead and give me a strength check, but with advantage. [SPEAKER_05]: Okay, I got a 10, yes with advantage.

[SPEAKER_05]: I got an 11 and the 8, and I have minus one to strength. [SPEAKER_07]: Well, you are not used as you just said you are not used to kind of doing any sort of physical activity. [SPEAKER_07]: Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. [SPEAKER_07]: So even this mopping really tires you out about 10 feet in, 10, 15 feet in, and you get through, but it's a struggle, which you also have one fail.

[SPEAKER_07]: But whether you wanted to or not, you've made it a little easier. [SPEAKER_07]: for indico behind you because you've cleaned up a little bit of a pathway. [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

[SPEAKER_03]: Sounds big enough where it's like I'm walking on clouds. [SPEAKER_03]: Is that an ability or a spell? [SPEAKER_03]: It's a trait. [SPEAKER_03]: It's one's per long rest. [SPEAKER_03]: We've up to 10 feet with upper-broken opportunity attacks. [SPEAKER_03]: And would you say that maybe this oil is a bit of an opportunity attack?

[SPEAKER_03]: Would you say perhaps we could stretch it out and say... Yeah! [SPEAKER_07]: I also think you're using a resource you have to try to accomplish a goal. [SPEAKER_07]: So yeah, I think what... [SPEAKER_07]: I think that will lower the difficulty class even more. [SPEAKER_07]: On top of Bartholomew Brian, clear a little bit more, perhaps.

[SPEAKER_07]: So we even easier now for you. [SPEAKER_03]: Okay, cool. [SPEAKER_03]: I'm gonna use that and I'm gonna run through and I'll be like, this is for my mom! [SPEAKER_07]: Great, give me a strength check. [SPEAKER_03]: It's a run, it must be sticky liquid. [SPEAKER_03]: That is a night, no, 21.

[SPEAKER_07]: You run through like a stallion. [SPEAKER_07]: There is nothing stopping you. [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_07]: You see Bartholomew Brian kind of clumsily stopping. [SPEAKER_07]: You see, [SPEAKER_07]: So you see Sonya collapsing in their glider and you just run right past so you've succeeded as well Thank you mom come on folks.

[SPEAKER_03]: We can use this together as one just use the power of Workplace friendship [SPEAKER_03]: Go boys, go boys, on three, on three, one, two, three. [SPEAKER_03]: Go boys, go boys, on three, on three, one, two, three. [SPEAKER_03]: Go boys, on three, go boys, on three, one, two, three. [SPEAKER_02]: Go boys, on three, go boys, on three, go boys, on three, go boys.

[SPEAKER_06]: Go boys, on three, go boys, on three, go boys, on three, go boys. [SPEAKER_06]: Go boys, on three, go boys, on three, go boys. [SPEAKER_06]: Go boys, on three, go boys, on three, go boys. [SPEAKER_06]: Go boys, on three, go boys, on three, go boys. [SPEAKER_06]: Go boys, on three, go boys, on three, go boys.

[SPEAKER_06]: Go boys, on three, go boys, on three, go boys. [SPEAKER_06]: Go boys, on three, go boys, on three, go boys. [SPEAKER_02]: Go boys, on three, go boys. [SPEAKER_02]: Go boys, on [SPEAKER_02]: I high-five, Indica. [SPEAKER_07]: As you keep running through, you all notice a bit up ahead of you that there are several orbs that are following from a high shelf that will land in your path.

[SPEAKER_07]: Orbs? [SPEAKER_07]: Just like, I don't know, some mysterious orbs in this orbs. [SPEAKER_07]: The orbs of Middrison, because the orbs of Middrison are falling. [SPEAKER_07]: Merit, what do you want to do? [SPEAKER_02]: Sonya, these orbs filled with something that shouldn't break. [SPEAKER_06]: Max, are these orbs filled with something that shouldn't break?

[SPEAKER_04]: Yes. [SPEAKER_02]: Yes. [SPEAKER_02]: All right. [SPEAKER_02]: And I put away the shatter spell. [SPEAKER_07]: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha [SPEAKER_02]: Uh, okay.

[SPEAKER_02]: Well, bonus action. [SPEAKER_02]: Who's so, so he is not still stuck in the thing, right? [SPEAKER_07]: You basically all keep keep going through, but when you get to two fails, you'll have been slowed up by the obstacle so much that the avalanche of shelving and stuff will have caught up with you.

[SPEAKER_02]: Great. [SPEAKER_02]: Okay. [SPEAKER_02]: Then as a bonus action, I have to use the bonus action to keep the song, the performance going, but I can also use that. [SPEAKER_02]: I can also use that same bonus action to use a bardic inspiration die. [SPEAKER_00]: Okay. [SPEAKER_02]: So I'm going to call over to Sonia.

[SPEAKER_02]: Hemroy, it's and Sonia's going to be a bardic inspiration. [SPEAKER_02]: And you have a D6 that you can basically add [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, I forgot you asked us to turn our Conochek. [SPEAKER_02]: That is a eight for that our Conochek. [SPEAKER_02]: These are Orbs. [SPEAKER_02]: Great. [SPEAKER_02]: These look really important.

[SPEAKER_02]: I rolled an 18. [SPEAKER_05]: Is this but everyone can everyone do this? [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, if you all want to turn our Conochek on these Orbs, you're welcome to the 21. [SPEAKER_07]: OK. [SPEAKER_03]: I rolled a two. [SPEAKER_07]: So for Merrick and Indica, do not let these Orbs, [SPEAKER_07]: do not damage these orbs or it will be bad, like real bad.

[SPEAKER_07]: Okay, Bartholomew and Sonya, if these smash on the ground, you're going to, there's going to be an explosion of sparks you might get days and get distracted a little bit. [SPEAKER_07]: So it's not great. [SPEAKER_07]: Okay, but you know it's not going to like blow up. [SPEAKER_02]: Oh god, these look dangerous and powerful.

[SPEAKER_02]: Can I cast? [SPEAKER_02]: I have enlarged reduced technically. [SPEAKER_02]: It's just for one object, but since we're playing a little fast and loose, can I cast enlarged reduce and reduce some of the sizes of these orbs so that there is easier to cast? [SPEAKER_05]: Actually, it's so good.

[SPEAKER_05]: Ooh. [SPEAKER_05]: Sure. [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_02]: One actually. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm a magician and I have great slide of hand. [SPEAKER_02]: Can I actually reduce the size of like three of them and then start juggling? [SPEAKER_07]: Yes, but that's gonna be a higher chin. [SPEAKER_02]: Sure, slide it in.

[SPEAKER_07]: Great. [SPEAKER_07]: Go ahead and give me a slight of handshake. [SPEAKER_02]: Right, sure. [SPEAKER_07]: Could try to catch three of these orbs. [SPEAKER_02]: Ooh, baby, that is a 25. [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, you, you walk in and with the 25 you get all four of these orbs that I have fallen from the shelf.

[SPEAKER_07]: Oh, you go, you like slide to catch the right before they hit the ground and you start juggling these tiny little orbs and you save everyone from having to do a check. [SPEAKER_07]: So that resets, Sonya and Bartholomeas failures. [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, yeah, so. [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, can I put these down?

[SPEAKER_07]: Absolutely. [SPEAKER_02]: Yes. [SPEAKER_02]: All right. [SPEAKER_02]: Well done, kid. [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you. [SPEAKER_02]: Um, and then I pocket one just so that we can use it later, maybe. [SPEAKER_07]: All four of you are continuing to run through this avalanche of shelves and it's loud.

[SPEAKER_07]: It's so loud, but somehow you're able to pick out a slight humming that you see coming [SPEAKER_07]: that you can kind of pinpoint to as a machine in front of you. [SPEAKER_07]: And it's just, it's really grinding your gears. [SPEAKER_07]: It's just this frequency. [SPEAKER_07]: It's distracting.

[SPEAKER_07]: It's kind of giving you some brain fog. [SPEAKER_07]: I guess we'll put, Barric at the end, because they did everything for everyone. [SPEAKER_07]: So that would be Sonia, you are up first. [SPEAKER_06]: Oh, and I mean, can I roll to figure out what this machine's gonna do? [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah.

[SPEAKER_06]: is it giving us this advantage on stuff? [SPEAKER_06]: Not yet. [SPEAKER_04]: Okay. [SPEAKER_04]: Wow, that's awesome. [SPEAKER_04]: That's awesome. [SPEAKER_04]: Hello, those headsets. [SPEAKER_06]: I am going to use my eyes of the maker, which is a level one mechanist feature, where I touch a magic item, or some other magic computer object, and I learn its properties, and how to use it, and several other things.

[SPEAKER_06]: So I run up to it, and touch it. [SPEAKER_06]: This is, uh, case to give me a name because you're really good at names. [SPEAKER_06]: Oh God, uh, this is the, this is the void engine of Kildrian. [SPEAKER_06]: Great. [SPEAKER_05]: So it's good, actually, to be fair. [SPEAKER_02]: He's really good at pulling names down the road.

[SPEAKER_02]: It's like an actual thing. [SPEAKER_07]: Kildrian? [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_06]: Great. [SPEAKER_06]: Kildrian tried to use it to take over the world and it didn't work out for him. [SPEAKER_06]: The void got him. [SPEAKER_07]: As you are seeing the inner workings of this void engine of Kildrian, you know exactly how to turn it off it now just becomes, can you actually do the task to do it?

[SPEAKER_07]: So go ahead and give me like a, like a, like a tinker tool check. [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, baby, that is a 19 with your knowledge of the inner workings of the void engine of Kildry and you are able to use your tools and just cut a wire here, flip a switch here, unscrew a bolt here, and it just powers down and all of your brain fog goes away for all four of you.

[SPEAKER_06]: Flips, flips this final switch and goes to [SPEAKER_04]: brushes are here out of our face, lights up a cigarette, Sonya, your nipples hard, Sonya's very flush, Sonya's flush, and she says, Mange Business. [SPEAKER_07]: You now run an eternal corner to the last right before the exit. [SPEAKER_07]: You see an abandoned forklift blocking your path.

[SPEAKER_04]: Oh no. [SPEAKER_07]: First up, it's Brothalmue. [SPEAKER_05]: I love the idea of both your action. [SPEAKER_05]: Hold your attention. [SPEAKER_05]: There's no threat here. [SPEAKER_05]: It's just a fact of both left. [SPEAKER_03]: I'm the threat. [SPEAKER_07]: You have to get past this.

[SPEAKER_02]: It's for the end of this and there's just enough of an awful forklift. [SPEAKER_05]: See you again. [SPEAKER_05]: The b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b- [SPEAKER_05]: But maybe I can get him fired.

[SPEAKER_05]: Hey buddy, check that out over there. [SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to hold my axe. [SPEAKER_07]: Great. [SPEAKER_07]: Indica, you see an abandoned fork lift right there. [SPEAKER_03]: Okay, cut to one hour before this, Brian's in my office, and we're talking, and I exchange a smart audio book with him for him stealing Sonya's keys to the forecliff to make you a copy for me.

[SPEAKER_03]: And so I pull out the copy of my key, and I make a mad dash towards the forecliff. [SPEAKER_07]: I need you to make it. [SPEAKER_07]: To make it. [SPEAKER_07]: I don't know what the ability is for this. [SPEAKER_03]: For Cliproll? [SPEAKER_07]: No, it's going to be a land vehicle's check, but I don't know what you roll.

[SPEAKER_02]: Because Indica have proficiency in a forward moment. [SPEAKER_07]: Indica has disadvantaged on this roll. [SPEAKER_07]: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, [SPEAKER_06]: I mean, I, I think it be, I can, yeah, I'm certified.

[SPEAKER_06]: I said if I'd freak maybe, I thought you were cool and to get them. [SPEAKER_02]: I just like the Brian's and the Brian's and the patience really good. [SPEAKER_02]: That's a great deal. [SPEAKER_06]: It's certified freak is crazy. [SPEAKER_05]: I will guess that I will guess that I think all of this hype talk makes Batholami really want Indica to get into the thing.

[SPEAKER_05]: So it's just a default add-on to whatever your highest role is or whatever your lowest role is. [SPEAKER_03]: I, well, I'm gonna, I'm gonna hop into it. [SPEAKER_03]: Okay. [SPEAKER_03]: I rolled an 11 minus one is 10 plus fours 14. [SPEAKER_02]: Woo! [SPEAKER_02]: Nice! [SPEAKER_02]: There we go.

[SPEAKER_07]: Okay, all right. [SPEAKER_07]: You insert your key into the ignition and turn it on. [SPEAKER_07]: You know exactly in this moment what you need to do and you drive this fork lift to clear up half. [SPEAKER_07]: Wow. [SPEAKER_07]: Indicator in particular, there's an avalanche behind you to do anything else with this fork lift.

[SPEAKER_03]: Oh, after I clear the path, I'm going straight out to the parking lot to drive this thing home. [SPEAKER_03]: That too, I think it's as they're for us, but I'll take it from there. [SPEAKER_07]: Amazing, yes, you all get to the entrance except for Indica who is left. [SPEAKER_07]: Who's doing donuts in the parking lot?

[SPEAKER_02]: I think he's just acting out because he's got an absent mother. [SPEAKER_07]: You were all standing in the doorway when there was just the collapse of the last shelf at that like of air as it just like blows your hair and your clothes. [SPEAKER_07]: And Sonya, you see an absolutely destroyed and catastrophic warehouse sitting in front of you.

[SPEAKER_06]: for nods. [SPEAKER_06]: And then says, job, excuse me for a moment. [SPEAKER_06]: Goes into her office and closes the door. [SPEAKER_02]: And you just hear, oh, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

[SPEAKER_07]: But you sign, the integral what is still at three. [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_02]: But I'll take, I'll draw the zero and then draw a little frowny face inside. [SPEAKER_02]: Yes. [SPEAKER_07]: As you leave to go back upstairs, you leave a warehouse that this morning read 36,472 days since our last accident.

[SPEAKER_07]: and now reads zero. [SPEAKER_06]: I think there's, I think there's a silent talking head with Sonya where she's sitting there and you just see her opening a flask. [SPEAKER_05]: So it's not the first time I've been Brian to get indicator to do something, you know, early tax filings we've done, I've had to take into a bar, I've had to do some like work retreat stuff as Brian, but you know, I mean it's it's Brian doesn't really know he has a really bad man being a sort of good clean fun.

[SPEAKER_05]: Sorry. [SPEAKER_05]: Wow. [SPEAKER_05]: It's really hard to get out of it when you're in it. [SPEAKER_05]: I'm fine. [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, Brian's awesome. [SPEAKER_03]: We hang out all the time. [SPEAKER_03]: He's telling me to do crazy wacky stuff. [SPEAKER_03]: I, I, I, I pull up a building last week because Brian told me to do it.

[SPEAKER_03]: It, this guy phenomenal. [SPEAKER_03]: Great person, 10 out of 10, I love him. [SPEAKER_02]: Merrick is at their desk writing some documents that are clearly a report to the higher ups. [SPEAKER_02]: And as they do, they look up from their desk and say, you know, some people really dread Mondays.

[SPEAKER_02]: It's always the first day of work and a lot of people just want that weekend to keep on going. [SPEAKER_02]: But for me, [SPEAKER_02]: If it wasn't Monday, wonderful learning opportunities like this wouldn't have happened. [SPEAKER_02]: And I'm just happy to be here with all my friends.

[SPEAKER_02]: And then I finish forging this report of like good, like this report of like everything went great today. [SPEAKER_02]: No one needs to get fired. [SPEAKER_02]: No one needs to get played a lie. [SPEAKER_02]: I have like a charlatans kit or whatever that I can basically just like write bullsh** with.

[SPEAKER_02]: And then I signed it and sent another wonderful report off and say Nobody's getting flayed today. [SPEAKER_07]: Not on my watch One thing I forgot to ask actually was so did you actually bring the Grimoire to the front desk to be sent off or I Mean the warehouse got destroyed [SPEAKER_06]: So, if I don't bring the grimoire up there, I might walk into traffic.

[SPEAKER_02]: So, there, there's a fork left out there, you ought to be careful. [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_04]: Yeah. [SPEAKER_07]: You're super-eared. [SPEAKER_07]: Indica, a quick question, are you coming back to the office after this, or are you just going to be out gallevanting with the fork lift?

[SPEAKER_03]: I do think I have to come back to do one last thing anyways. [SPEAKER_03]: So I think I parked the forklift at home and then, uh... [SPEAKER_02]: Come back, I forgot your actual keys. [SPEAKER_03]: Yeah, I forgot my actual keys to mine. [SPEAKER_06]: My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, [SPEAKER_07]: So after you all take some time to recover from the catastrophe that was the warehouse, you're all sitting and chatting and steaming in the break room, that smells strongly of fish and not a good fish.

[SPEAKER_07]: When into the break room runs Dendric Kingsley from Accounting, she's a blue covaled in a blouse and skirt with a pitch black high ponytail. [SPEAKER_07]: Oh my god, have you seen the... Oh, hey Sonya, and she gives you kind of a bit of a little coilock before remembering why she's there.

[SPEAKER_07]: Oh, what happened to the warehouse? [SPEAKER_07]: They're not letting anyone down there. [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, uh... [SPEAKER_06]: you know it's a little thing it's uh we do this sort of emergency preparedness drill every so often where we leave it in shampals and then see how fast we can put it back together just in case uh you know and apocalypse happens before the apocalypse wow that's that's that's that's really interesting um [SPEAKER_07]: She's like, this is like playing with like the the bottom of her like shirt, just kind of like tore like it a little bit.

[SPEAKER_07]: Wow. [SPEAKER_07]: And as that's happening, the fire alarm goes off. [SPEAKER_04]: Oh. [SPEAKER_07]: This is not. [SPEAKER_07]: Recently, this has been a pretty common occurrence. [SPEAKER_06]: It's Indica in the room, Indica is in the room. [SPEAKER_07]: Okay, what this happens. [SPEAKER_07]: And people are getting up and moving outside and complaining about it happening and be like, God, why does it, they gotta get that fixed.

[SPEAKER_03]: I've been telling Derek to take the batteries out of those things for months now. [SPEAKER_05]: I keep taking the batteries out just in the hopes that someone will die but unfortunately someone is putting the batteries back in and I'm pretty sure it's [SPEAKER_06]: Uh, son you get's the door for dendra.

[SPEAKER_06]: Oh, it's like, after you. [SPEAKER_06]: Thank you. [SPEAKER_07]: Oh. [SPEAKER_07]: And you all start to head outside when you get out when everyone is outside. [SPEAKER_07]: You just start to hear these pings and vibrations coming from everywhere. [SPEAKER_07]: Your phones are blowing up with notifications from Chantry Connect.

[SPEAKER_07]: The great Chantry is work and social media app. [SPEAKER_07]: The people around you are starting to get stressed and you all look at your phones and see post. [SPEAKER_07]: Is this real? [SPEAKER_07]: Who could it be? [SPEAKER_07]: And they're all sharing the same link to a video. [SPEAKER_07]: Before pressing play, the still images of an elven woman in flowing blue and yellow ropes.

[SPEAKER_07]: At the elven woman's hip is a magnificent sword with a slight glow to it. [SPEAKER_07]: You all know who this is. [SPEAKER_07]: This is a whole devar queen of the labyrinth and sworn enemy of [SPEAKER_03]: We get on the big screen, put it on the big screen. [SPEAKER_03]: Someone again, someone's cast their phone to the big screen.

[SPEAKER_02]: Miracle press play on it. [SPEAKER_07]: We always knew the great chantry was a threat, but it would appear that threat is growing and imminent. [SPEAKER_07]: Our sources within the Chantry have told us that they have arc, angel, kelbellet, outsearching for the keys to the irrevocable apocalypse as we speak.

[SPEAKER_07]: Do not worry. [SPEAKER_07]: We, the keepers of the keys will do everything in our power to make sure the labrant is safe and the great Chantry is destroyed once and for all. [SPEAKER_07]: Stay vigilant citizens and we will persevere. [SPEAKER_07]: As she finishes, she turns to leave, revealing someone else you recognize, a goblin in a white button down shirt and slacks.

[SPEAKER_07]: They push up their glasses as they follow hold of our off stage. [SPEAKER_07]: Join us next time for part two of THANK GOD, it's Doomsday. [SPEAKER_07]: Get a kill him. [SPEAKER_04]: That's not gonna do this. [SPEAKER_04]: I'm gonna do this. [SPEAKER_02]: I'm gonna do this. [SPEAKER_02]: Oh my god, that's the creator.

[SPEAKER_06]: Wow, such a dick. [SPEAKER_01]: Thanks so much for listening to another episode of Maychan High Five. [SPEAKER_01]: Thank God it's Doomsday. [SPEAKER_01]: Wanna show your support for our show? [SPEAKER_01]: Wanna hear us talk more about it? [SPEAKER_01]: Then check out our Patreon at patreon.cobs.maychan high five.

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[SPEAKER_01]: Ooh, I got this down! [SPEAKER_01]: Come on, I need a real challenge! [SPEAKER_01]: Tell your friends about the show, tell your folks about the show, tell the 10 foot Costco skeleton in your front yard about the show and when you do it use the hashtag mh5 and hey, how about a high five?

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