E223: Sex After Baby: Postpartum Sex, Intimacy & Desire

The postpartum stage can be one of the hardest (and least talked about) seasons a couple will ever go through.

Your relationship changes. Your body changes. Your sex life changes.

And with all of that comes a swirl of feelings you might not have expected:

•
Resentment toward your partner

•
A crushing imbalance in the mental load

•
Feeling “touched out” 24/7

•
Nervousness (or fear) about having sex again

•
Worries about your body never feeling — or looking — the same

•
The awkward, elephant-in-the-room disconnection that can build over months

In this episode, we’re answering YOUR most personal, vulnerable questions about intimacy and connection after having kids — from being scared to get pregnant again, to changes in sensation, to finding your spark when you feel more like co-managers than romantic partners.

💛 Here’s what we’re covering:

•
Why being “cleared” for sex at 6 weeks doesn’t mean you have to be ready

•
How to break the silence when it’s been months (or longer) since you’ve been intimate

•
What to do if sex is painful after a tear or complicated delivery

•
Navigating body image, “too loose” worries, and changes in arousal triggers

•
How to reconnect when parenting has taken over every ounce of energy

•
Advice for partners who struggle to see their spouse sexually after birth

•
The most powerful way a partner can make a new mom feel truly seen, appreciated, and desired

Whether you’re weeks postpartum or years down the road, this conversation is a reminder that you’re not broken, you’re not alone, and you can find your way back to each other.

👩‍👩‍👧 Raise safe, smart & shame-free kids — and build a lifetime of trust so you’re the one they turn to.

From “Where do babies come from?” to “What does 69 mean?” 😳, Beyond the Birds & the Bees gives you the exact words to say in just 5–7 minutes per topic.

A complete digital parenting tool-kit. Think bite-sized, age-by-age audio guides and real-life scripts make even the trickiest conversations easier — so your kids learn about sex, consent, identity, and relationships from you, not TikTok.

Start today ➡️ vmtherapy.com/kids

🎧 Stay connected

📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️instagram.com/vanessaandxanderhttps://instagra…

💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns.

Sign up here 👉🏻 vmtherapy.com/subscribe

🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods!

==========================
THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS
==========================
👏Thanks Live It Up. Use code PILLOW for 15% off your first Super Greens order! ➡︎letsliveitup.com/pillow
👏Thanks Lola Blankets. Use code PILLOW and get 35% off your entire order. Experience the world’s #1 blanket with Lola Blankets.➡︎lolablankets.com
👏Thanks Hungryroot. Use code PILLOW to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life. ➡︎hungryroot.com/pillow
👏Thanks Cozy Earth. Use code PILLOWTALKS for 40% off! And if you get a Post-Purchase Survey, make sure to let them know you heard about Cozy Earth right here! ➡︎cozyearth.com

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices