Would You Rather Game (Bunker Edition)

0:02Keith You are listening to the Common Sense Practical Prepper, sponsored by Duct Tape, the real Duct Tape. It fixes everything except that decision. Good evening, Mr. and Mrs. America, from border to border, coast to coast, and all ships at sea. Here is your host, Keith.

0:21 Hey, all this is Keith, and welcome back to the Common Sense Practical Prepper Podcast for October the 29th, 2026. Lord have mercy, what a day in the world of social media. My ex algorithm is absolutely slammed with people, not asking me, but people just in general asking what they should be doing, how they should be preparing, reference this 90-day Fortress America thing.

0:52 This thing has grown legs and has gone absolutely bonkers. Now there are people asking legitimate questions, don't get me wrong, but there seems to be either a lot of bots or a lot of opportunists or a lot of people just trying to stir the pot. But around noon today, I just had to step away from the phone because it was just absolutely crazy talk out there.

1:19 So let's do a fun podcast. Let's suspend reality for 15 minutes. And this episode is called Would You Rather? The 90-day Bunker Edition. So if you've never played Would You Rather, this is how you play it. Picture this: you're sitting there with your family, you're at home, and the emergency broadcast alert comes over, and there is pick a disaster du jour, and you're told to go to your bunker immediately.

1:51 Your bunker is fully stocked. You grab whoever you need to grab, and you go downstairs, you go into your bunker, you lock the door. You are gonna be in this bunker for 90 days. It is fully supplied, so you don't have to bring anything from the house. You are in your bunker, the door is locked, it will not unlock for 90 days.

2:14 So here's the game we're gonna play. I'm gonna give you a question. It's gonna be would you rather have this or that? And you have to pick an answer. Okay, here is the first question. Number one, would you rather spend 90 days in the bunker with someone who hums the same song all day long every day for 90 days, or someone who narrates everything they do out loud?

2:42 Like, I'm opening the can of beans now. I'm now stirring the beans. Boy, these beans taste really good. I think I would probably have to pick them humming the same song. Hopefully, I can go to a different side of the bunker so I don't hear them hum that song every waking hour. So that's number one. Number two, would you rather eat nothing but canned spam for those 90 days or nothing but freeze-dried ice cream, the astronaut ice cream for 90 days?

3:19 That's a tough one because I have freeze-dried ice cream sandwiches before, and they are really, really good. Oh man, that's a tough one. Okay, I'm gonna go with spam because you can probably maybe spice the spam up a little bit, maybe add a few things. So I'm gonna go with the spam for 90 days. Would you rather have one single movie that you have to watch once every night for 90 nights, or 150 movies randomly chosen for you that are dubbed in a language that you do not speak and there are no subtitles?

4:06 I'm gonna go with a catalog of movies that are dubbed in a language that I don't speak because I think I would drive myself bananas watching the same movie 90 times. I told you this was the silly version. All right, would you rather have a bunker toilet that works perfectly but plays a loud trumpet fanfare every time you flush it?

4:34 Or a toilet with no sound at all, but there's no door or curtain for privacy where the toilet is. I'm going with the bunker that plays the loud trumpet fanfare. All right. What about the clock? Would you rather have no clock at all, which means you have no idea what time of day or night it is, or have a clock that is exactly three hours and 10 minutes wrong every time you look at it, but you're not sure if it's three hours and 10 minutes ahead or three hours and 10 minutes behind.

5:17 I think after a few days, I would go with a clock that's off three hours and 10 minutes, because at least you have something to look at. Because if you're in the bunker for 90 days, you are quickly going to lose track of time. So I'd rather have time that is at least wrong than not knowing what time it is at all.

5:40 Period. Number six, the mystery crate. A lifetime supply of duct tape, but every time you tear off a piece, it screams like a goat or a top-of-the-line backup generator that only runs while someone is pedaling a bicycle attached to it. And it takes 45 minutes of pedaling to charge your cell phone. Not that we can use our cell phone, but that's how slow it's going to charge.

6:11 Number seven, would you rather have a flashlight that works perfectly, but only as long as you're not looking at it, or a radio that works perfectly, but it only plays polka music at a steady, loud volume? I am gonna go with the flashlight. I'll set it on the counter, I'll try to get it to reflect off of something, but just not look at it.

6:43 Number eight, water. Would you rather have a water filter at the end of your stored water supply? The water filter works great, but every time you take a drink, it tastes like the filter was filtered through dirty socks, but it wasn't. It just tastes like that. Or would you rather have the water come out of the filter that is absolutely clear, taste perfect, except it comes out one drop at a time, kind of like an IV?

7:22 Man, I oh my gosh. I'm gonna have to go with dirty socks. I'm just gonna say it. I'm not sure why, but I'm just gonna say it. I'm going with dirty socks. I don't have much patience, and I doubt if I could sit there for like two hours just to get a cup of water. Number nine, shoes. Would you rather have shoes that you cannot take off not once for all 90 days, or shoes that make a fart sound every time you take a step?

7:52 And you can't walk around barefoot. You can take them off at night when you get in bed, but when you're up, you have to have the shoes on. Oh man. I'm gonna go with the fart sound. I'll just have to make the best of it. Number 10. An alarm clock that wakes you up every morning with a rooster crowing at full volume, or an alarm clock that wakes you up by gently whispering your full legal name for 10 straight minutes, and you can't turn it off.

8:25 So you wake up after the first minute, you still hear it whispering your name for the next nine minutes, even though you're awake and you cannot hit the snooze button. I'm gonna go with the rooster. Just crowing at full volume, I'm up, and the alarm clock turns itself off. Number 11. Would you rather have a mouse in your bunker that steals one cracker a day and leaves you a nice thank you note, or a cricket that chirps only when you're trying to fall asleep?

8:59 I'm gonna go with the bunker mouse, and I'm not really sure why. But probably with everything else going on, all the stress of being in that bunker with farting shoes and trumpeting toilets, I don't think I could take the cricket making that sound when I'm trying to fall asleep. So I'm going with the bunker mouse.

9:20 Number 12, your camp stove or your butane stove, since we're in a bunker. Your stove that cooks everything to a slightly burnt taste every meal, every time, or a camp stove or butane stove that takes 45 minutes to boil a single cup of water. Oh my gosh. Man, if you pair that with the dirty socks and the water that's barely coming out of the filter.

9:50 Oh my gosh. All right, I'm going with 45 minutes to boil a single cup of water. All right, I'm not, I'm just going with it. I'm not going to think about it. That's the one I'm going with. Number 13, game night. Would you rather be playing Monopoly every night with someone who cheats but never admits it?

10:12 Or playing Uno every night with someone that explains the rules out loud every single turn. If you're not familiar with Uno, just substitute whatever card game of your choice. Poker, old maid, go fish, hearts, just substitute whatever card game you want. Oh, I don't even know about that one. Because I play Monopoly with people that cheat and they never admit it.

10:40 They're hiding money under their board, they're making side deals, somebody has to go to the bathroom and they're like texting them, and before you know it, it's like, oh, I'm not going to charge Michael rent. I'm like, who made that rule? Yeah, Monopoly is pretty cutthroat when it comes to comes to playing around this household.

10:56 So I'm going with I'm going with Uno. I'm going with Uno. Number 14, the radio check-in. Would you rather have a walkie-talkie that only picks up your neighbor reading their grocery list or a ham radio where every reply comes back with somebody talking like a pirate? I'm going to go with the ham radio because at least we get some outside contact.

11:21 But every time they respond, every person that responds, every answer, they're talking like a pirate. Yeah, I'm going with the pirate. I'm going with pirate radio. All right. Here's the lightning round. These are coming at you quick. Don't think about it. Just answer. And I'll do like five seconds between.

11:41 And then I'll give you my answers. Okay, here we go. Your only condiment in the bunker. Hot sauce or ketchup? All right, what's your answer? All right, next. Socks that are always slightly damp, or a pillow that's always slightly warm. All right, I need your answer. A bunker that smells faintly of popcorn, of movie theater popcorn, or faintly like a campfire?

12:20 Alright, need your answer. And the last question for the lightning round. Would you rather forget how to whistle or forget how to snap your fingers for those 90 days?

12:36unknown Oof.

12:36 Okay. Hot sauce or ketchup. I'm going with ketchup. Damp socks or warm pillow. I'm going to go with the warm pillow. Popcorn or campfire smell in the bunker. I'm going to have to go with campfire. Because movie theater popcorn, especially with the ones with butter on it, just that smell just gets to me after a while.

13:02 It gets really old. And forget how to whistle or snap your fingers for those 90 days. I'm going to go with forget how to whistle. That's kind of a toss-up. I'm going to go forget how to whistle. All right, folks. So that's the game. 90 days in your bunker. Would you rather? I don't know. That sounds like a pretty good time.

13:25 I mean, you got to do something to pass the time. So we got loud toilets, roosters crowing, water that tastes like socks, people cheating on Monopoly. Well, you definitely won't be bored. That is absolutely for sure. All right, folks, I just needed to suspend reality for a little bit. It's been a crazy, crazy day on social media.

13:47 Unfortunately, I had to attend a funeral this afternoon for a police officer that I worked with who passed away. So that was that kind of sucked to say the least. But anyway, all right, folks, practicalprep podcast at gmail.com. I'm on the Twitters, prep underscore podcast, buildyourark.net. And I'll be going out of town next week, heading out west, Monday through Thursday, I believe.

14:16 I should probably check my flights. Monday through Thursday, if I have a chance to post something, it'll be like a one-minute survival tip through my phone. Not taking my personal laptop or any of my gear with me. Not really going to have that much time, that much free time. But anyway, all right, folks, thank you so much.

14:33 Really do appreciate it. And as always, please be careful out there. Take care of one another. Count your blessings. Until next time.

14:47Keith You've been listening to the Common Sense Practical Prepper. Subscribe, like, drop a review over and out.