The Four Kinds of Connections We Need

In the final episode of The Curiosity Shop, Brené Brown and Adam Grant draw on Adam’s new book, Vibe (out October 13), to explore how recognizing the differences between associates, allies, pals, and companions can help us better understand our connections. They unpack the pressure we put on relationships, the importance of being clear about what we want from them, and why a great interaction doesn’t always need to become an ongoing relationship. They also explore the idea of being on the same wavelength and the concept of “sonder,” the recognition that we can never fully know another person’s inner world. Along the way, Brené and Adam reflect on their own relationship, what they’ve learned from working together, and how their connection has evolved throughout The Curiosity Shop.

Vibe – Adam Grant, 2026, adamgrant.net (adamgrant.net/book/vibe)

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Friendship – Bennett Helm, 2021, Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy (plato.stanford.edu/entries/friendship)

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Sonder – John Koenig, The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows (dictionaryofobscuresorrows.com/post/2353692266…)

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Awe, the Small Self, and Prosocial Behavior – Paul Piff, 2015, Journal of Personality and Social Psychology (doi.org/10.1037/pspi0000018)

The Emotions You've Felt but Never Named with John Koenig – Adam Grant, 2025, ReThinking (Apple Podcasts) (podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-emotions-you…)

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Developmental Changes in the Relation between Youth Disclosure and Parenting Behavior: A Cohort-sequential Analysis – Sara Goldstein, 2023, Journal of Youth and Adolescence (doi.org/10.1007/s10964-023-01823-5)

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9 Words for Types of Parenting – Merriam-Webster, Merriam-Webster Wordplay (merriam-webster.com/wordplay/types-of-parents-…)

The Art of Gathering: How We Meet and Why It Matters – Priya Parker, 2018, Riverhead / Penguin Random House (priyaparker.com/the-art-of-gathering)

The Liking Gap in Conversations: Do People Like Us More Than We Think? – Erica Boothby, 2018, Psychological Science (clarkrelationshiplab.yale.edu/sites/default/fi…)

Can Conflict Actually Make Our Relationships …