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Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason

von Jeremy Ellett

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STITCHES is the home of Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Christmas Diner and The One Stars. Good Pointe’s lineup of original satirical dark comedies. Each season is a stand-alone limited series created by Jeremy Ellett.

Season One: Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason

"Randy Dunning and Gayle Kruger, two conspiracy obsessed Influencers, kidnap a Freemason in an ill-advised attempt to uncover the "Secret Knowledge" of the world."

Season Two: Christmas Diner

"An unstable man takes the patrons of a small town diner hostage on Christmas Day.”

Season Three: The One Stars

"One Star Reviews from all across the Multiverse. Overrated Moon Vacations. Haunted Electronics. Cat beds that don't come in human sizes. Its MST3K meets One Star Reviews in this award-winning comedy fiction podcast. Starring Autumn Hardwood (as Emma Elizabeth) and Blythe Renay.."

STITCHES. The Fiction Podcast home for Satirical Dark Comedy.

Created by Jeremy Ellett.

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  1. Feed Drop: Joy to the World

    Hey folks! Today on the feed we’re continuing our Half-Christmas celebration by featuring an orbiting holiday audio drama called: Joy to the World. The folks at Joy to the World were kind enough to help us out during our launch for Christma

  2. The One Stars, Episode 8: The Two Santa Claus Theory

    The Second Half of our experimental Dragon and Punk Rock themed Holiday Special! [This episode was originally released on 12/18/2020.] NO A.I. WAS USED IN THE PRODUCTION OF THIS PODCAST CAST and CREW: Autumn Hardwood (aka Emma Elizabeth) as

  3. The One Stars, Episode 7: I Won't Be Home for Christmas

    The One Stars Holiday Special! Negative Nancy gets a call from home. [This episode was originally release on December 18, 2020] NO A.I. WAS USED IN THE PRODUCTION OF THIS PODCAST CAST and CREW: Autumn Hardwood (aka Emma Elizabeth) as Negati

  4. Feed Drop: We Fix Space Junk

    Hey Folks, today on the feed we’re thrilled to get the chance to share with you all, one of our favorite Audio Dramas of all time. Its called WE FIX SPACE JUNK and its from our friends at Battle Bird Productions. 'We Fix Space Junk' follows

  5. The One Stars, Episode 6: The Hole Thing

    The One Stars, Episode 6: The Hole Thing What's at the bottom of the deepest depression on earth? It's the One Stars Season One Finale! The One Stars News Network covers an ever-expanding sinkhole. [This episode was originally released on S

  6. The One Stars, Episode 5: No Magic or Cats Allowed

    The One Stars, Episode Five: No Magic or Cats Allowed [This episode was originally released on August 28, 2020] NO MAGIC OR CATS ALLOWED Something about cats or something about magic. But definitely not both. This episode includes reviews o

  7. The One Stars, Episode 4: I've Got Places to Be

    Negative Nancy is stuck in traffic. Reviews of: a Time Machine, The World's Largest Penny, an Abandoned Mall, a Grocery Store, a Rocket and a Mood Ring. [This Episode was originally released August 14, 2020] NO A.I. WAS USED IN THE PRODUCTI

  8. Feed Drop: Finding Pattersby

    Hey folks, Welcome Back to Stitches. Today on the feed we’re sharing one of our favorite weird-fiction comedy podcasts. It’s called FINDING PATTERSBY. Finding Pattersby is a Fake True Crime comedy and Supernatural Mystery about an ex-ghostw

  9. The One Stars, Episode 3: Please Hold

    The One Stars, Episode Three: Please Hold (This episode was originally released on July 31, 2020) Negative Nancy is on hold. This episode includes reviews of: Ethan's Erasers. Can of Mace. Can of Beans. A Special Collection. NO A.I. WAS USE

  10. The One Stars, Episode 2: Haunted by Your Post

    The One Stars, Episode Two: Haunted by Your Post [This episode was originally released on: July 16, 2020] NO A.I. WAS USED IN THE PRODUCTION OF THIS PODCAST Negative Nancy combs through her old social media posts to eliminate any old and po

  11. The One Stars, Episode 1: Over the Moon

    The One Stars, Episode One: Over the Moon [Originally released on: July 2, 2020] Negative Nancy is over the Moon. This episode includes reviews of: An Uber Driver. A Moon Vacation. A Ukulele. The Moon Landing Museum. CAST: Autumn Hardwood (

  12. Feed Drop: The Kingmaker Histories

    Set in a fictional European republic in the years leading up to World War One, The Kingmaker Histories follows an assistant tailor named Colette who becomes the unwitting host for a deadly alien power source- the Kingmaker Diamond. Hunted b

  13. Christmas Diner, Episode 6: Here Comes Santa Claus

    Christmas Diner, Episode 6: Here Comes Santa Claus Writing, Sound Design, and Musical Arrangement by Jeremy Ellett. STARRING: Zane Schacht as Buster. Peter Lewis as the Narrator. Blythe Renay as Erica. Josh Rubino as Douglass. Ryan Philbroo

  14. Christmas Diner, Episode 5: Ghost of Christmas Past

    Christmas Diner, Episode 5: Ghost of Christmas Past Buster finally gets what he wants for Christmas. Writing, Sound Design, and Musical Arrangement by Jeremy Ellett. STARRING: Zane Schacht as Buster. Peter Lewis as the Narrator. Blythe Rena

  15. Christmas Diner, Episode 4: Is Gremlins a Christmas Movie?

    Christmas Diner, Episode 4: Is Gremlins a Christmas Movie? Buster explains what Christmas is really about. Writing, Sound Design, and Musical Arrangement by Jeremy Ellett. STARRING: Zane Schacht as Buster. Peter Lewis as the Narrator. Blyth

  16. Christmas Diner, Episode 3: I Need a Grandma

    Christmas Diner, Episode 3: I Need a Grandma "What do y’all want for Christmas?" Writing, Sound Design, and Musical Arrangement by Jeremy Ellett. STARRING: Zane Schacht as Buster. Peter Lewis as the Narrator. Ryan Philbrook as Chris. Lauren

  17. Christmas Diner, Episode 2: My Only Wish

    Christmas Diner, Episode 2: My Only Wish Buster gets the family together for the holiday. Writing, Sound Design, and Musical Arrangement by Jeremy Ellett. STARRING: Zane Schacht as Buster. Erin Lillis as Buster’s Mother. Peter Lewis as the

  18. Christmas Diner, Episode 1: All I Want

    Christmas Diner, Episode 1: All I Want "Welcome to The Golden Griddle Diner. Open 24 hours. 365 days a year. Alex and Holly wait for the call that will change their lives forever. Reggie and Kathy get to work. And Buster places his order."

  19. Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 18: Forgive the Freemasons (Crossover Episode with Forgive Me)

    Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 18: Forgive the Freemasons (Crossover Episode with Forgive Me) Secret Freemason Father Klem hears the confession of The Ghost of Sir Isaac Newton. Its a Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason x Fo

  20. Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 17: So It Goes Down (Season Finale)

    Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 17: So It Goes Down (Season Finale) Sir Isaac Newton tells all! Randy Dunning gives his all! It’s all coming to a head! The Season One finale of Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason. Writing, So

  21. Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 16: In Beautiful Orlando, Florida

    Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 16: In Beautiful Orlando, Florida A Flat Earther’s origin story. Why Randy Dunning is so Randy Dunning. CAST: Zane Schacht as Randy. Lauren Grace Thompson as Gayle. Jack Carmichael as the Narrat

  22. Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 15: Multilevel Malevolence

    Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 15: Multilevel Malevolence Randy visits the bookstore. Mac gets answers. And Millie talks to the dumpster. CAST: Zane Schacht as Randy. Lauren Grace Thompson as Gayle. Jack Carmichael as the Nar

  23. Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 14: Kafkaesque

    Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 14: Kafkaesque Randy and Walt finally agree to be honest with each other. Something weird is going on with Gayle. CAST: Zane Schacht as Randy. Lauren Grace Thompson as Gayle. Jack Carmichael as

  24. Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 13: A Just and Upright Mason

    Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 13: A Just and Upright Mason Mac and Arlo continue their search for The Owl of Euclid. Mac talks to an old friend. Arlo meets the Void. CAST: Jack Carmichael as Narrator. David Ault as Mac. Dean

  25. Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 12: SCP-2FEKAF: BOBO (Crossover Episode with SCP Archives)

    Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 12: SCP-2FEKAF: BOBO SCP-2FEKAF: Bobo is a special CROSSOVER EPISODE between SCP Archives and Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason. Randy and Gayle visit Angshin Pass and come face to face with

  26. Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 11: The Top Five Serial Killers in St. Louis

    Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 11: The Top Five Serial Killers in St. Louis Randy and Gayle attend a meeting of the Maple Hill Murder Club. Writing, Sound Design, and Musical Arrangement by Jeremy Ellett. CAST: Zane Schacht a

  27. Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 10: My First Time Using a Chainsaw

    Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 10: My First Time Using a Chainsaw Randy and Gayle meet a new friend at the Hardware Store. Sir Isaac Newton recites his "Catalog of Sins." CAST: Zane Schacht as Randy. Lauren Grace Thompson as

  28. Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 9: Enter the Echo Chamber

    Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 9: Enter the Echo Chamber Everyone wants to know the answer. But nobody wants to hear the truth… It's the 12th Annual Conspiracy-Con in Kansas City! CAST: Zane Schacht as Randy. Lauren Grace Tho

  29. Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 8: Almost Famous

    Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 8: Almost Famous Randy checks in at Conspiracy Con while Gayle is forced into babysitting duty. CAST: Zane Schacht as Randy. Lauren Grace Thompson as Gayle. Jack Carmichael as the Narrator. Matt

  30. Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 7: Who Will Stand Guard?

    Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason, Episode 7: Who Will Stand Guard? The Freemasons panic. Mac takes Arlo under his wing. CAST: Jack Carmichael as the Narrator. David Ault as Mac. Dean J. Smith as Arlo. Sena Bryer as Larry. Dallas Wheatle

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