- alle zwei WochenErscheinungsrhythmus
- 39 mintypische Länge
- 22. Okt.letzte Folge
The Ask The Unfaithful Podcast, is a safe place for both Unfaithful and Betrayed Partners to find hope and healing. This podcast draws on both our personal and professional experience to provide expert insight into the mind of the Unfaithful, and how their behaviors traumatically affect the life, heart and even brain plasticity of Betrayed Partners.
Ask the Unfaithful is hosted by two Unfaithfuls in long-term recovery, James and Sam:
Therapist and coach James Annear who co-owns CORE Relationship Recovery with his wife, Sharon Rinearson. They have been helping couples recover from the traumatic impacts of infidelity, sexually compulsive behaviors and addiction for over a decade.
Formerly with Affair Recovery and now host of Sam's Healing Podcast, Sam has been producing videos for almost 10 years and helping to care for those in crisis due to infidelity and addiction for almost 15 years.
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DEFENSIVENESS: WHAT ARE THE UNFAITHFUL REALLY DEFENDING WHEN THEY GET DEFENSIVE?
Why do unfaithful partners become so defensive - even when they genuinely want to repair the damage they've caused? After infidelity or betrayal, the unfaithful partner's defensiveness can show up in countless ways: explaining, minimizing,
5 MISTAKES THE UNFAITHFUL MAKE THAT WILL END BETRAYAL RECOVERY
Are you genuinely trying to repair your relationship after infidelity—but still finding that your betrayed partner doesn't feel safe, understood, or supported? In betrayal recovery, unfaithful partners often make mistakes that seem complete
TRICKLE TRUTH: Why Staggered Disclosures Re-Traumatize Betrayed Partners in the Worst Way
Why can trickle truth feel even more devastating than discovering the affair itself? For many betrayed partners, discovery is not a single event. First comes the affair. Then another detail emerges. Weeks later, another confession. Months l
4 MISTAKES THAT PREVENT COUPLES FROM HEALING FROM INFIDELITY
Are you actually moving forward in betrayal recovery or are you rushing to avoid discomfort? After infidelity, many unfaithful partners enter recovery with sincere intentions. They want healing, forgiveness, trust, and some sense of normalc
THE VICTIM MINDSET: WHY THE UNFAITHFUL WHINES, BLAMES, AND ISN'T EMPATHETIC
What if the biggest obstacle to your recovery isn't shame, defensiveness, or even your affair - but believing you're the victim? Many unfaithful partners experience real grief, shame, fear, and emotional pain after discovery. But when that
4 WAYS THE UNFAITHFUL MINIMIZE AND DEFLECT
Why does recovery stall even when you're trying? If you're the unfaithful partner, you may genuinely want to heal your relationship—but without realizing it, you could be making four common mistakes that keep your betrayed partner feeling u
4 WAYS THE UNFAITHFUL LEARNED IT WAS OKAY TO CHEAT
HOW DID THE UNFAITHFUL LEARN THAT INFIDELITY WAS OKAY? Can your childhood make you more prone to infidelity? Not by causing you to cheat, but by shaping how you learned to handle shame, conflict, rejection, loneliness, and emotional distres
5 PATTERNS THAT CAN CAUSE THE UNFAITHFUL TO CHEAT (AND TO FAIL IN BETRAYAL RECOVERY)
Why do unfaithful partners cheat and why do they have such a hard time staying in recovery? The answer is almost never just one reason. In this episode of Ask the Unfaithful, James and Sam explore five of the most common psychological behav
THE ONE ACTION THAT UNLOCKS THE UNFAITHFUL'S RECOVERY WORK
What is the ONE action that unlocks real recovery for the unfaithful? In this powerful episode of Ask The Unfaithful, James Annear and Sam reveal the single most important shift that determines whether recovery actually works—or quietly fai
IS THE UNFAITHFUL SLEEPWALKING THROUGH BETRAYAL RECOVERY?
How conscious are you of your actions and how they impact your own recovery, your betrayed's recovery and your relational recovery? In this powerful episode of Ask The Unfaithful, James and Sam explore one of the most uncomfortable truths a
BREADCRUMBING: HOW THE UNFAITHFUL CREATE A TRAUMA BOND THAT KEEPS THE BETRAYED POWERLESS TO HEAL
What is breadcrumbing, and why is it one of the most damaging patterns an unfaithful partner can engage in during recovery? In this episode of Ask The Unfaithful, James and Sam explore how breadcrumbing keeps betrayed partners emotionally a
10 Hallmarks of Authentic Betrayal Recovery In The Unfaithful
Are you actually doing the work… or just going through the motions? In this episode of Ask The Unfaithful, Sam and James break down 10 powerful signs of authentic recovery—and how to know if you're truly changing… or just performing. If you
15 LANGUAGE SHIFTS THE UNFAITHFUL CAN USE TO REBUILD TRUST AFTER BETRAYAL
If you're trying to rebuild trust after betrayal, your words matter more than you think as James and Sam discussed in the previous episode of Ask The Unfaithful. In this episode, Sam and James break down 15 critical language shifts that mov
IN BETRAYAL RECOVERY, WORDS MATTER - HEALING vs. HARMFUL LANGUAGE
After betrayal, your words are no longer neutral. In this episode of Ask The Unfaithful, we break down the critical difference between healing language and harmful language and why the way you speak can help your betrayed partner heal… or d
3 CORE MISUNDERSTANDINGS THE UNFAITHFUL HAVE THAT BLOCK RELATIONAL RECOVERY
Why does it feel like no matter what you, the unfaithful, do… your partner still isn't okay? In this episode of Ask The Unfaithful, we break down the 3 core misunderstandings that block recovery after infidelity—and why many unfaithful part
THIS "RECOVERY BEHAVIOR" IS JUST ANOTHER FORM OF BETRAYAL
In this powerful episode of Ask The Unfaithful, we break down a hidden but deeply damaging pattern in relationships affected by infidelity: self-erasure - when the unfaithful partner suppresses their voice, identity, and emotions in the nam
UNDERSTANDING BETRAYAL: DO MEN AND WOMEN CHEAT FOR DIFFERENT REASONS?
In this powerful episode of Ask The Unfaithful, James Annear and Sam explore the key psychological, developmental, and behavioral differences between male and female problematic sexual behaviors—including infidelity, emotional affairs, comp
SUBTLE WAYS THE UNFAITHFUL PHONE IN BETRAYAL RECOVERY - PERFORMATIVE VS REAL RECOVERY
Are you really in recovery… or are you just performing it? In this episode of Ask The Unfaithful, James and Sam tackle one of the most damaging patterns in affair recovery: performative recovery — also known as "phoning it in." There are ob
Peter Pan Syndrome: Can The Unfaithful Ever Really Grow Up?
In this episode of Ask The Unfaithful, James and Sam explore "Peter Pan Syndrome" (the "Eternal Child") through a Jungian and trauma-informed lens, unpacking why some unfaithful partners compulsively avoid responsibility, abjectly resist ad
Rebuilding Trust: The Missing Key The Unfaithful MUST Know
One of the most overlooked drivers of infidelity isn't desire, entitlement, or opportunity — it's broken self-trust. In this episode of Ask The Unfaithful, James and Sam dive deep into lack of self-trust in the unfaithful partner and why it
Is The Unfaithful's Self Care Really Self Indulgence?
Are you truly practicing self-compassion… or actually slipping into self-indulgence? In this episode of Ask The Unfaithful, James and Sam break down one of the most misunderstood parts of infidelity recovery: the razor-thin line between hea
S6: NEW BEGINNINGS - The Hidden Turning Point For the Unfaithful In Betrayal Recovery
In this episode of Ask The Unfaithful, James speaks directly to those who have betrayed their partner and are ready to become someone different. He unpacks what real new beginnings require. You'll learn what a new beginning is not, what it
7 WAYS THE UNFAITHFUL MISHANDLE THE BETRAYED'S DISENFRANCHISED GRIEF
In this dynamic episode of Ask The Unfaithful, Sam and James unpack disenfranchised grief—the deep, invisible grief the betrayed partner experiences after infidelity. This is grief with no rituals, no casseroles, no support, and no social p
LIMERENCE: CAN THE DAMAGE EVER BE REPAIRED?
Limerence is one of the most misunderstood - and devastating - experiences in infidelity recovery. In this episode, James and Sam break down what limerence actually is, how it distorts reality, why the unfaithful become trapped in its neuro
What are No Lose Decisions In Infidelity Recovery?
In this provocative and practical episode of Ask The Unfaithful, Sam and James break down one of the most transformative concepts in affair recovery: No-Lose Decisions — the courageous choices that move you forward no matter the issue or th
HEALING FROM SECRET INTRIGUE
In this powerful episode of Ask The Unfaithful, James and Sam take an unflinching look at how to heal one of the most deceptive forces blocking recovery after infidelity — secret intrigue. What begins as seemingly curiosity or emotional "bu
INTRIGUE: The Silent Saboteur of Healing and Connection After Infidelity
What if the greatest threat to your recovery after infidelity isn't what you think it is? In this episode of Ask The Unfaithful, James and Sam unpack how "intrigue" quietly destroys connection, fuels secrecy, and sabotages healing long befo
What Are The Consequences of People Pleasing For the Unfaithful?
"Healing begins when we choose authenticity over approval and prioritize the love that truly matters." In this episode of Ask the Unfaithful, James and Sam reveal how people pleasing critically affects the Unfaithful and the steps to stoppi
ATU Shorts SE5: Helping the Unfaithful Move From "Not It!" to "Got it!"
On today's episode of "Moving from Not It to Got It," Sam takes listeners on an honest journey through the pivotal moment when an unfaithful spouse chooses to stop deflecting and starts owning their actions. The episode opens by breaking do
10 Ways the Unfaithful's Distorted Thinking Destroys Hope
Stinking Thinking is more than just negative self-talk—it's the distorted, automatic thought patterns that block empathy, sabotage trust, and keep both the unfaithful and the betrayed partner stuck in cycles of pain. In this episode of Ask
