Q&A: God Hearing the Prayers of Sinners, God Hardening Your Heart, and Marital Intimacy

0:07 From the Christian Research Institute in Charlotte, North Carolina, you're listening to the Bible Answer Man broadcast with Hank Hanegraaff. We're on the air because life and truth matter. The mission of the Christian Research Institute is to equip believers to answer life's essential questions soundly and persuasively, and to give the reason for the hope that you have with gentleness and respect. For more information, go online to equip.org.

0:36 The following program was pre-recorded. And now, here's Bible Answer Man host, Hank Hanegraaff.

0:43 Thank you very much, Randy. First up today, Pam, listening in South Carolina on the web. Hi, Pam.

0:49 Hello, Hank. Thank you for taking my call. I'm a new Christian, and I know since I've become a Christian, I know really a couple of miracles that I truly believe that God has done in my life. And I have this insatiable desire thirst you know to learn I can't get enough and I'm not that's not what I'm complaining about I actually feel blessed for that but I was talking to a friend last night who's a Christian and I was telling her I have these vices that I want but I want to get out of my tobacco use I smoke and I'm in the middle of trying to get my disability and I have gotten addicted to pain pills and I've been praying that God help me with these things and she said something to the fact that you know, God turns a deaf ear to

1:37 sin or something. And I almost ripped my heart out. I said, well, I mean, what are you saying, that all these prayers that I'm doing is not doing me any good? And she said, well, I mean, if it's knowingly sin or something she was trying to tell me. It just blew my mind. And I said, well, if that's the case, then here's no prayers because everybody's a sinner.

2:01 And I just want to know what you think about her comments.

2:04 Well, just as you have cried out on the air, you can cry out to God. He loves you. He knows every detail of your life. He cares about your addictions and wants to free you from those addictions. But he uses real people in real time to help those who stumble and fall. And therefore, it is crucial that you are part of a healthy, well-balanced church that where people cannot give you bad advice, but come around and pick you up as you fall, give you the kind of encouragement, counsel, and accountability that you need. So, yes, God hears your prayer. Yes, God is intimately acquainted with the pain and the anguish you feel. He cares. You are not demonstrating... that you don't love God, you're demonstrating

3:02 that you do love Him, that you want to be pleasing to Him. That's why you're crying out to Him in the first place, and He loves you, He cares for you, and He does hear and will answer your prayer. And don't despair, but don't go this road alone either. Make sure you do it with other believers.

3:24 I mean, I got saved at New Spring Church, but because of my financial situation, New Springs is like 45 minutes away, and so I'm not involved in a church at this moment, you know, and I feel guilty because I can't tithe, because I just don't have the finances. You know, just a lot of guilt things going on, too. Pam, listen to me.

3:47 Pam, listen to me for a second. Don't let the guilt control you. Love God. Let Him work out the details. This is the beauty of the Christian life. He comes to us just as we are. He justifies us, just as though we had never sinned. And then the one that justifies us does the work of sanctifying us. He's going to change you from the inside out. Don't forget the means of grace, and don't despair. Don't let guilt override your sincere love and passion for God. And here's what I want you to do. I'm going to send you a book. You don't have to pay for it.

4:40 We'll take care of it. But I want you to read the book. That's what I'm asking you to do. Because I want you to be aware of the means of grace and the spiritual discipline. So you hang on. I'll send you the book. And that book will lead and guide you. to partake of spiritual disciplines so that you can become more and more like Christ. And it gives you the practical way of doing that. So hang on, I'll get the information out to you. Don't despair and don't go it alone.

5:09 Thank you.

5:10 And I have managed to get a couple, I'm reading the resurrection right now that you wrote, and I have gotten the apocalypse code, you know, when I can manage to scrape up some money. But I do appreciate it, and I love you so much in a Christian way, and may God bless you.

5:27 I love your.

5:27 Show so much.

5:29 Bless you, Pam. Hang on.

5:31 Don't go away.

5:31 I want to make sure I get this book out to you.

5:33 Okay.

5:34 God doesn't need your money. He loves the fact that you love Him, and He loves you in return. I want to go back to the phone lines and talk to Roderick. He's listening in East Orange, New Jersey. Hi, Roderick.

5:47 How you doing, Hank?

5:48 I'm doing well. Good talking to you.

5:49 God bless you, and thank you for taking the call. My interest is in John 1 and 17. It says the Lord was given by Moses, but grace and truth came by Jesus Christ. And I heard a minister preaching on that grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. Before Jesus Christ, the grace and truth that they had They didn't really have. And I really didn't, I couldn't see that.

6:21 Well, you shouldn't see that. It's dead wrong. The reality is we have grace and truth already with the fall of Adam and Eve and the unfolding plan of salvation seen in the proto-evangel early on in the book of Genesis, Genesis chapter 3. So grace and truth have always been with God's people in every epoch of time. Jesus Christ was a lamb slain before the foundations of the world.

6:52 So his grace and truth was appropriated to Abraham just as it is now appropriated to you after the cross. Now to Abraham it was seen through types and shadows. You see it clearly because the cross has come. But grace and truth have always been there for the people of God. relevant to Ruth, relevant to Rahab, relevant to Jacob, relevant to Daniel, and just as relevant to the Apostle Paul after the death of Jesus Christ. So grace and truth are seen more clearly, but grace and truth have always been available to God's people, true Israel, on both sides of the cross.

7:42 Okay, I knew grace and truth has always been, you know, God always showed us grace. But the way he was saying it, he was saying that you always have to, about us, have to get the message from priests and, you know, prophets and stuff like that. The information was always limited as far as getting the truth and grace.

8:07 Well, it wasn't limited, but it was veiled in some sense. Abraham didn't see what we see as clearly as we see it. And the reason was, prior to Christ, everything was veiled in types and shadows. So he didn't see the cross with the clarity that you and I see the cross, but yet the same means of grace and truth available to him as available to you. And of course we see that when you think about the apostle Paul on Mars Hill who says from one man, God made every nation of men that they should inhabit the entire earth. He determined the exact time and places that they should live, and he did that so that men may reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from each one of us. So again, grace and truth always available to God's people in time

9:05 and space and ultimately for all eternity.

9:08 Okay, thank you.

9:09 You got it. And back to the phone lines. We'll talk to Patty next. Grand Junction, Colorado, listening on the web.

9:15 Hi, Patty.

9:17 Hello, Hank.

9:17 Thank you for taking my call.

9:19 My pleasure.

9:20 My husband and I are separated. We were married for about three and a half years, and we started having some difficulties, and his solution was to kick me out of the house, and he used the scriptures, Romans 9, Ephesians 4, and 1 Peter, where God talks about hardening the heart, and he claims that God hardened his heart towards me, and that's how this all came about.

9:47 Well, he's abusing the scripture. I mean, if you look at Romans 9, that should be all you need to look at. Mercy in Romans 9 was the occasion for the hardening of Pharaoh's heart. Every time God removed the plague, Pharaoh responded in disobedience. So this is hardly a text that ratifies this choice of hardening his heart towards you.

10:10 What the Bible tells us in context is something far different, and that is that we should always seek for reconciliation we should always be willing to forgive. So if you are wanting to be forgiven, he is willing to forgive or vice versa, we should always stand ready so that true reconciliation could take place. This is a classic case of a person abusing the scripture, using it incorrectly as a proof text so that he can harden his own heart, which the Bible also talks about. I mean, there are two sides of that coin. On the one hand, Pharaoh hardened his heart. On the other hand, God hardened Pharaoh's heart.

10:52 But when you have that side of the equation, God hardening Pharaoh's heart, remember it was mercy that became the occasion for the hardening of Pharaoh's heart. We'll be right back with more answers to your questions. Stay tuned for that.

11:03 The famous British apologist G.K. Chesterton once noted, the true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him. Because at CRI, we love what is behind us, our faith, our families, and our freedoms. We will never retreat quietly from the growing assaults on life and truth. Even when the costs are great, we will stand. To join like-minded friends in making a difference at home and around the globe, and to equip fellow believers to stand their ground courageously, become a member of CRI's support team. Simply call 888-7000-CRI.

11:42 That's 888-7000-CRI or visit our website at equip.org. Stay with us. Hank Hanegraaff will return in a few moments.

12:01 Truth Matters, Life Matters More details Hank Hanegraaff's personal pilgrimage from his long defense of truth to his discovery that life matters more. Essentially two books in one, part one equips Christians to defend the essential truths of the historic Christian faith. Part two explains why truth is necessary but hardly sufficient. That the map is not the territory, the menu is not the meal. We are created to experience life to the full through union with God in Christ.

12:30 Is there more to the Christian life than what you are experiencing? Truth Matters, Life Matters More unveils the unexpected beauty of an authentic Christian life. To receive Truth Matters Life Matters More for yourself or as a terrific gift to a friend or loved one, call 888-7000-CRI and make a gift to support the Christian Research Institute's life-changing outreaches, 888-7000-CRI, or visit us online at equip.org.

13:00 The Complete Bible Answer Book Collector's Edition is the comprehensive collection of the most often asked questions Hank Hanegraaff has received throughout his four decades as host of the Bible Answer Man broadcast. With more than half a million copies already in print, this newly revised and expanded Collector's Edition Help seekers and skeptics alike sort through the truth on topics such as reliability of the Bible, religions and cults, the resurrection and afterlife, and many more issues vital to a better understanding of God in Christ and our relationship to Him. To receive your copy of the complete Bible answer book, collector's edition, revised and expanded, call 888-7000-CRI and make a gift to support the Christian Research Institute's life-changing outreaches.

13:50 888-7000-CRI or visit us at equip.org. Has God spoken? Are the words of Scripture merely human in origin, or are they in fact the very words of God Himself? Three years in the making and based on two decades of research and reflection, Hank Hanegraaff's monumental book, Has God Spoken?, answers what is surely the most important question facing our world.

14:27 In Has God Spoken? Memorable Proofs of the Bible's Divine Inspiration, Hank counters the contentions of the Bible attackers and clearly shows that belief in the Holy Scriptures is not a guess or wishful thinking. It is the only logical conclusion after an honest examination of overwhelming evidence. Order Has God Spoken from the Christian Research Institute by calling 888-7000-CRI or go online to equip.org, equip.org. Now back to the Bible Answer Man broadcast and your host, Hank Hanegraaff.

15:12 Thank you very much, Randy. We'll go right back to our phone callers. Next up, Sean. He's listening in Canada, Edmonton, Alberta, to be exact. Hi, Sean.

15:19 Hey, how are you today?

15:21 Doing good.

15:23 Glad to hear it. My question is the passage 1 Corinthians 7, verse 5. I'm a married guy. I've been a Christian for a bit. And like... I would like to have sex way more often with my wife than she would like to. And so I'm trying to figure out what this passage means, because, like, if I could get daily, that would be great. Non-Christians, when they get sexually frustrated, they can go ahead and use pornography. But Christians, we're supposed to be all disciplined and stuff. So I'm trying to work this out, but it's pretty tough for me.

16:08 Yep.

16:08 Well, a couple of things that I would say is that we want intimacy with God so often without the investment of quality time. And that's not how it works. Intimacy comes through the investment of quality time. And I think what applies in that arena with our Creator also applies with our spouse. Intimacy comes with the investment of quality time, where you're really intimately involved in your wife's life.

16:37 That's what develops intimacy. The one thing I would caution you about is using a text like this to beat your wife over the head and say, do not deprive each other, and then say, this is what the Word of God says, and therefore, if you deprive me, then you're violating the Word of God. This is something that she needs to be convicted of on her own if she has shortcomings in that area, because this is one of the things you have to understand about love and intimacy.

17:06 It can't be coerced. can't be forced. When it is, it becomes artificial. It becomes non-satisfying, even though it might provide a release, it doesn't provide satisfaction. So I think this becomes something that you may want to talk to your wife about candidly, but again, understand that in the Christian worldview, We have relationship not based on feelings, but relationship based on commitment. That commitment ultimately leads to feelings or leads to intimacy. The commitment has to be to an investment in your wife. If you invest your life in your wife, intimacy becomes the byproduct, and the sexual experience becomes the byproduct, and then in a way that's truly gratifying, satisfying. So don't put the cart before the

18:04 horse where you determine the number of times you want to have sex a week to be fulfilled, but do things in proper sequence. The proper sequence is invest your life in your wife. The returns will come in and of themselves, and then they won't be coerced, forced, or the kind of thing that doesn't satisfy anyway, any more than pornography would. Pornography doesn't satisfy. It actually gives you a false sense of satisfaction, which really can't, in the end, solve the issue of intimacy, which we were born for.

18:39 We weren't born to use one another. We were born to be intimate with one another. That's ultimately what marriage leads to. And that's why marriage is between a man and a woman. It's between two people that develop a sense of trust and intimacy over time through the investment of quality time.

18:57 Okay. Okay?

18:59 Okay.

19:00 Yeah, it's like, from my perspective, I go, well, should I just use pornography?

19:07 No, absolutely not. Look, this is learning self-control. We have a journal article. If you haven't read it, you need a copy of it.

19:17 The Effects of Porn on the Male Brain.

19:18 Exactly. You don't want to go down a bad road. That's a bad road. That's a road by which you injure yourself.

19:25 Well, yeah, but everybody does it, so it's kind of like, well, the women there are always interested, they're always available, and they're more than happy to make you feel good.

19:38 But this is exactly the point. This is using people, whether it's from the female perspective or the male perspective, you become a disposable piece of machinery. This is completely antithetical to a Christian worldview and it doesn't satisfy it and traps it and snares. So all I'm telling you is if you put the cart and the horse in proper sequence where the horse pulls the cart, you begin by saying the solution is ultimately, is investment of quality time in my wife's life. That will produce intimacy.

20:20 Okay.

20:21 Well, yeah, we work on it and stuff, but it's kind of like married people often have worse sex lives than single people, because single people who aren't Christians can go ahead and satisfy themselves.

20:37 Well, it's not true. Look, a lot of people will call me on the show, and that's why I started out with this illustration. They'll call up on the show and they'll say, you know what, I just can't find any intimacy with God. But what's really going on? Well, they rush into God's presence before their knees ever hit the ground. They're already thinking about getting back into their friendship lifestyle. And we treat our most beloved and intimate relationships in the same way. We want... Intimacy without the investment in quality time. And I'm suggesting that you invest quality time and the intimacy will become the byproduct of that.

21:12 Does that make sense to you?

21:14 Yeah, like don't focus specifically on how many times we have sex. Focus on being intimate and then everything.

21:23 No, focus on investing quality time. So just think about those three words, investing quality time.

21:34 Okie dokie.

21:35 Okay, those are three words that I want to have riveted in your brain. Investing quality time. Now that takes work, that takes nurture, but boy, the rewards are phenomenal. Listen to an old man with 12 children.

21:51 I was going to say, I have children, and maybe that's part of the reason why it's so difficult.

21:56 No, it doesn't have to be difficult.

21:58 Fair enough.

21:59 Okay.

21:59 Glad to hear it. Thank you.

22:01 Okay, man. Good talking to you. Back to the phone lines. We'll talk to Pat next in Livermore, Colorado. Hi, Pat.

22:06 Hi, Hank, and I want to thank you for defending the truth. We have Christianity in crisis, and it's an invaluable teaching, and we spread it with as many people as we can. My question is, because a friend of mine is really pushing to listen to Andrew Womack, Is his teaching scripturally sound? Because there's a couple of things that I've heard that he teaches that are concerning to me.

22:37 Well, they should be. I mean, he's a classic Word of Faith teacher. That's exactly what I've written about in Christian Crisis.

22:42 Okay, if he's Word of Faith, then that tells me everything.

22:44 Yeah. Oh, yeah.

22:46 Well, I've heard that he believes in levitation. She said that His son died and was dead for five hours and rose to life, and I said, is there any medical documentation about that? And she just kind of, you know, dances around the issue, and I also have a problem with what he teaches about the sovereignty of God, like he questions it.

23:11 Yeah, well, this guy's got more theological hang-ups than a dry cleaner, so he's not the kind of guy you want to listen to, and certainly... a person that if you're familiar with the truth, you will spot him as a counterfeit instantaneously. And that, again, becomes the thing that all of us need to focus on, and that is becoming so familiar with the truth that when counterfeits like this loom on the horizon, we know it instantaneously. And I'll tell you, it's a pervasive problem in our culture.

23:37 I was at a church, a Haitian church in Boston, and the pastor was very, very much early on in his ministry, concerned about the fact that people come out of one of the poorest nations in the Western Hemisphere. They come to America and they're easily sucked into the prosperity gospel. And he was concerned about that and started a church as a result of that, has a church of people who are committed to the word of God as opposed to Christ being a means to their ends.

24:09 And so there is such a pervasive concern pull towards the prosperity gospel. Everything in our society drives us in that direction. Thus, it becomes so important to be steeped in a Christian worldview, and that, of course, is what I intended to promote in writing Christianity in Crisis, so that people have this discernment and can look at the Master as being satisfying, as opposed to looking at the Master's table as the end.

24:40 Right.

24:40 Well, see, we don't even want to waste time listening to him. But I have to have something factual that I can give her. And if we send in a donation and ask for information on this that I can hand her and say, read this. And then whether she receives it or not is between her and God.

25:03 Yeah, as is the donation. I mean, we'll send you the material without the donation.

25:07 I know. I know you will, but I don't believe in eating off of other people's plates. But is that one way I could get information on this specifically?

25:16 Yeah, absolutely. Just hang on. Okay, Hank.

25:19 Thank you so much, and God bless you.

25:21 You got it. God bless you as well, Pat. Appreciate your call. We're out of here for today. We'll be right back here next week with more answers to your questions. Look forward to talking to you Monday afternoon. by God's grace right here on the Bible Answer Man broadcast. Have a great weekend. May God continue to bless and use you for His glory and the extension of His kingdom.

25:40 Thank you for joining us for the Bible Answer Man broadcast. In today's post-truth culture of confusion, the Christian Research Institute exists to equip listeners like you with answers to communicate the gospel of hope to a world in desperate need of life and truth, because life and truth matter. In addition to truth, we want to equip you with life, not simply to know about God, but truly to know Him.

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27:01 Hank Hanegraaff has dedicated his life to defending truth because truth matters. Yet an encounter with Christians in the underground church of China left Hanegraaff contemplating his Christian experience. They were experiencing something beyond truth. They were experiencing life. Truth Matters, Life Matters More by Hank Hanegraaff is two books in one.

27:21 Because Truth Matters, part one equips Christians to defend the essential truths of the historic Christian faith. In part two, Hank explains why life matters more and how we can experience the height of human existence, union with God. Prepare to move past intellectually knowing about God to experientially knowing God in Christ. To receive your copy of Truth Matters, Life Matters More, The Unexpected Beauty of an Authentic Christian Life, call 888-7000-CRI and make a gift to support the Christian Research Institute's life-changing outreaches, 888-7000-CRI, or visit us at equip.org.