You Asked for it: The ALYSSA Episode!

Welcome to Brief Recess. I'm Michael Foot, I'm Melissa Albranch. Today we're going to talk about Pepsi versus Coke, the song of the Summer. We found out a lot of people have no internal monologue, allegedly. We have an update on the Alex Murdau murder trial. Trump recently dropped his lawsuit against the I R S. We have our best Dealyssa joining us to talk about concussions, world travel, and relationship advice. And we're going to answer all your questions and rude reviews from my dms. So stick around. Well, there's such thing as winter Green, but there is something such a thing as Pepperman.

Okay, but I'm I'm allowed to not like. But I don't like, Michael, I don't like winter Green. I think it tastes disgusting.

I prefer there's barely a difference between Winterman and Peppers unless.

You don't like something, in which case I don't like winter Green and I don't want it.

For context, I just broke into someone's desk at the iHeart Studios and took a bunch of mints, and it turns out their winter Green, and Melissa didn't want them.

I don't like winter green.

They're good.

No, they are not.

And you could tell you she smelled it and knew immediately, yes that it was winter You could. I could not.

I don't.

In my head, I wouldn't know.

Do you know the difference between coke and PEPSI answer carefully?

I know. I honestly was about to give a hot take, and then it was like, this might be the thing that does me in. I can taste the difference, but I don't care about the difference. If I'm drinking a cola, and that's the end of the show. That's the end of our show. Folks, Thank you so much for going to need to take pepsi challenge. If I am drinking a cola, it's it doesn't matter to me. I do not care. They're both great, they both taste delicious. I know this is like. And the thing is is that it's actually the hottest take of all the coke pepsi takes, because when your take is that it's the same, you piss off everyone. It's not like you made the pepsi people happy. No, they're mad at you too. So I

know God gives his like toughest battles to his sexiest warriors, you know. And that is and it's and it's really my cross to bear. Out of all the things in my life like this is the one that keeps me up.

At night, I've never been more disappointed in anybody in line. I know, I know, not only not only am I.

Outraged and enraged, But wouldn't you want me to be honest with you?

No, I'm yeah, but you're I mean, yes, thank you for being honest. I appreciate your honesty.

I'm loving this. I'm loving this. I'm loving this. It's very military Chikh militia Melbourne.

This is I want you to thank you for the compliment. But we're not getting away from the coke versus.

I'm really trying to change the subject.

So not only do they taste vastly different, yes, vastly different, yes.

But I think it's because I'm I will eat and drink any most things. I love every I'm not a picky beverage girly. If someone hands you a PEPSI, you're gonna spit on them, slap it out of their hands.

I won't accept it. I will not accept it. If I go something, no, I will not be as I don't understand.

I think that's a little crazy.

I don't like it.

Okay, all right, I think it's pretty similar to a coke.

No, it is not at all, right at all.

Maybe you're a super taster, I'm not. Do you eat cilantro? Yes, well, then you're not a supertastious.

I like I like Clancha.

Have you seen these clips of Tyra Banks saying she's a super taster.

No, Tira should not be speaking.

Of crazy people with hot opinions about Yeah.

Pepsi does not taste good and coke is delicious, Okay, really tastes different. And if I go place and I'm going to ask for like a soda, I ask that you confirm is it pepsi or coke? And if they say pepsi, I say no, thank you can to have a.

Nice Well, I feel like it's ninety nine percent of the time it's going to be a coke. If it's a pepsi, they will say we have pepsi.

I mean, I feel like pepsi is very down south. It's like pepsi is big down there for some.

Reason, down south of Union Square where the taco bell is. Yes, that's where that's why they sell pepsi a Taco.

Bell, they do, which is why I don't go.

To Taco Bell. Now, maybe that's why I like pepsi so much, because I'm always I've got I'm doing cartwheels, both legs behind my head, drinking a pepsi at Taco Bell four in the morning.

I here's the thing about I haven't had Taco Bell in a really, i mean years, decades.

But.

I think I would enjoy the Mexican pizza, which is what I used to love.

That was mine. We love the Mexican pizza. Love a little cross cultural mashup like that. Like that is that's Alis Island.

That's why they came.

That's true American immigration story right there, the Mexican pizza. Summer Bell, Thank you so much. Let's get into a sidebar. What it's finally hot in the city. The boobies are out, the legs are out, the thigh, the thigh met, the knee, biscuits, the ankles, the cankles, all of it all out, open toad shoes on.

They get a petty cure.

Friends, are you excited for summer? I am excited for some girl summer.

I am really excited about what I believe is going to be the song of summer. And we're not allowed to sing things, but I want to tell you the title of the song. Are you ready?

Can I guess?

Yeah?

Is it heated rivalry related? Okay? Is it a song that I would like?

Know? It's brand new, so you may have.

Heard I'm not cool enough. I would not.

Well, I'm not that cool either, but I heard it.

But you heard it.

I heard it, okay multiple times? Are you ready?

I'm ready?

Are you ready? The name of the song is Melissa, We're Drunken Outside stah and guy, can I tell you I am going to be insufferable this summer?

Why did I have to call you out by name like that? They specifically said.

Melissa, We're drunken outside.

Give the coordinates of where you were saying.

It is a Soka song, so it's very rhythmic.

Oh yeah, electric boogloo?

Please leave? You have angered the people and Tobago.

Oh why is it not pronounced boogoloo?

It's not that.

That's Oh that the Milicia. The Melissa song is from Trinidad.

Yeah, it's a Sosoka song. I believe, I believe that it is Trinidadian into.

They always do a summer cocktail. There's always like a summer beverage like the world. I don't know. Someone will say, oh, it's the summer twenty twenty six cocktail.

What is that do you think?

And it's like the Nigerian Prince like it's always like this weird cocktail and there's always like operal and amorrow mixed with champag hand in a little bit of coke. It's like something to discussed.

I'm really into Saint Germain and prosecco.

That sounds sweet.

It is sweet.

I wanted to hurt going down. I don't want like.

It's not enjoyable.

It is. Don't okay, don't king shame you're coming in hot with the I'm sorry, it's almost bride.

I don't want the drink to hurt me. Other things can hurt me, but not the drink. I don't want the drink to her me.

Yeah. So they're always they always do a summer cocktail, and I feel like that'll come too. With Saint Germain and prosecco right.

Now, that's what I feel like. It's like very light.

Do you chill the Saint Germain?

Yes?

Oh okay, So that's that's important because.

It's the Saint Germain and obviously the prosecco is chilled. Well well, well guess.

To talk about hocktails.

And look who's here showed up.

She smelled it.

The Gail Meyer is in the building, and we are excited about this. We weren't sure that she was going to show it was. It was touch and gopher, Yeah, it was, it was.

I was on tinderhooks. But what you do this weekend?

I'm so glad that you asked, Michael. So this weekend, my lovely goddaughter Emma graduated from college and we had a lovely party for her where I saw my aunt who hadn't seen it in a while, and my aunt is a fan of the pod, and she had a few questions.

I'm ready.

One of the questions was just like, sometimes I don't see you talking about me. Sometimes I don't see you. Sometimes I see Michael walking and talking to himself.

Oh yeah, and.

He always has on a beautiful shirt.

Love.

Okay, So don't you guy wants to know why she sees you walking around and talking by yourself? Was he talking to don't you get he was a friend of the pod and She was just like, why aren't you with him? And why is he talking to himself? And where does he get his shirts?

That's actually a question I asked myself all the time. That is great. I love that. Yeah, I love her just asking the concept of a TikTok. Why is he talking to the camera?

So I think I don't. I don't think that my aunt understands that your TikTok is different, if not the show at all.

Love that. That is so bad because.

For whatever reason, it's all coming to her at once once.

She's just getting on the show.

And he doesn't understand. She's very confused.

My shirts I get them from EVERYWHEM and I get most of my stuff on eBay. Honestly, once you know your size, you can just like doom scroll eBay that on stuff it gets quite dangerous. Yeah, what were her other questions?

Yeah, she's very very She was very curious as to why you are talking to yourself? I am too, and why I'm not w you and where you get your shirts?

Do you know some people don't have internal monologues? Have you heard about this?

Who are these people?

I don't know, but mine's been set.

What do you mean when you people don't have internal monologue.

Some people just don't have them. Is that real? Yeah? Do you have an internal model? Study? It's like a certain percentage of the population.

Friends in the room, do you all have internal monologue? It is a safe space if you don't, that's okay.

Is it just like crickets right never stops? I don't, So I honestly envy the people who don't.

I don't. I think that's a very dangerous place to be. I do because because that means that there isn't a voice in your head saying to you maybe you shouldn't do this thing, or like talking out a problem that you just do.

Yeah, how do they function? It's like that guy. That guy got an MRI and like ninety percent of his brain was missing, but he lived a normal life. Yeah, there are like some real anomaies.

Yeah, because I feel like I've met.

People where I'm like, you don't have an internal monologue. I can tell you.

Don't have an internal monologue, or you don't have a conscience. I do you know what I say, Like, there's no like because I really feel like your internal monologue will stop you right from doing dangerous things.

What's the ethics of someone without an internal monologue.

Yeah, if you friends, if you don't have an internal monologue, can you let us know. I'm really curious. I'm really curious. Is to go ahead?

It says up to ten percent of the population does not have an internal monologue.

Okay, so that actually makes me feel better that it's not that many people.

No, that's a lot of people.

No, no, no, but I mean yeah, then I would have been like, oh, what's going on for the people who know? It's not even a judgment. I'm just really curious, Like what, I don't even know what that means to not have an internal monologue.

They obviously can live their life.

No, no, no, they're living, but our decisions.

And drive and like hold down a job like it's not but they're not having critical thinking solo time in the shower, you know, like you and I are.

If I'm going to go out, let's get to go food shopping, let's see. Right, So I'm like, okay, I'm going to go food shopping and then maybe I'll have to double back and go to the dry room. Like I feel like that's a little bit of an internal monologue also, right, it's not just like how do I feel about life in itself. It's like regular things. So if you don't have that, how are you deciding if you're in the car on the subway where to get off?

We're going to let us know if that's you, because I feel like this could be like a spectrum disorder or something, you know what I mean. It doesn't have to be.

There's there's varying reports that some some say.

Like psychology today says up to fifty percent of people.

Fifty percent see that? I think, is wow?

Well definitely everyone in our government. Well, actually, no, I don't want to say that people are stupid. If they don't have an internal monologue, no going to be brilliant. They just process out loud.

Is that what we're out loud?

And don't we only know like five percent about the human brain? Like there's only like so much that we actually know.

Interesting?

Can we get into algorithms? I wanted to ask you, did you follow the murder murders at all?

A little bit?

Okay, because it's gripped.

I don't understand what happened, what came to light?

So glad you asked what.

Came to light to allow this to happen?

There was a leged jury interference, gotcha. So his conviction is now being questioned. So it was a twenty twenty three double murder conviction. It's been vacated in South Carolina, which doesn't mean he's just like walks free. He is. He's still in prison for financial crimes. Okay, so the criminal charges I've been vacated, but he's doing hard time.

He saw them do hard time.

Oh yes, and he's currently serving a sentence. So it wasn't like he's released.

I know. But the loved ones, yeah, you know, oh, of course, all those people, the victims. So when something like that happened, you you want the person responsible to pay for the act.

Absolutely not.

It doesn't matter that he's still going to do hard time for the financial stuff. Yeah, the people who love the folks that he of course took care, you know what I mean?

Like, yeah, all right. So the allegations are that the Supreme Court unanimously found that former clerk Becky Hill improperly influenced jurors and denied Murder a fair trial. The jury interference centered on the comments Hill made to the jurors, including remarks about watching his body language. So she was telling jurors, like watch his body language, don't be fooled by him, like the county clerk at the courthouse.

Is it because she just wanted to be sure that he went to jail like that he served the time.

No, I mean it really is.

Well, now the thing about it is here, this is again so she did this Allegedly she did this for him, but if she's been the county clerk for a while, who else was she doing this for? So now it's gone. This is the problem with stuff like this now is because now people are going to be revisiting the cases where she had been involved to see if she had done the same thing for others.

Yeah, and the retrials could be higher stakes. They're saying that they might go for the death penalty now in the retrial. So there was this like undue influence. But Murda is suing her in federal court for influencing the trial, sure civil rights lawsuit jerry tampering misconduct. So this has like blown back up again. We're all talking about this fine like again we thought that we thought we got the conviction, it was over, and now it's and it's not back in the headlines. Another like trial in the headlines.

Have you seen the Trump was suing the irs for ten billion dollars? Okay, today he dropped it. He dropped it.

Yeah, yeah, he just dropped it because.

The judge was basically like, you guys have to show evidence that the parties in this lawsuit are different because both parties were hired by Trump. It's his private attorneys and then his government attorneys negotiating against each other for a settlement of taxpayer dollars that will be paid to Trump.

So the judge was like, you have to prove It's called diversity of parties. So she was like, you have to show that these parties are actually separate and different and have competing interests for there to even be a hearing.

And he can't.

And he can't, so he wrapped it Withdrew with prejudice.

I don't understand what a.

Waste of time money.

It's a waste of time and money. And I really feel like, I mean, obviously, I'm obviously I'm sure he wants a payday whenever he can get one, but this is just distractions, yes, exactly, Like he just wants to distract us from the lousy job that he's doing. He wants to distract us from the Epstein stuff like this is all all anything that he could do to make us look elsewhere.

Yep, he will do. And it's always like this is one lawsuit. I'm sure there's fifty others where he's lining his pockets that we're not talking about, you know, yeah, yeah, it's crazy. He was in China last week.

Did you see how what he was saying to the Chinese government. What was really great about our two countries is how much American people love Chinese food. That, you know, the same way that Chinese people have really taken to like basketball and stuff. American people really love Chinese food.

Just as many Chinese now love basketball and blue jeans. Chinese restaurants in America today outnumber the five largest fast food change in the United States all combined. That's a pretty big shape.

That is such a weird thing to say.

I mean, it is a weird thing to say. But is it is I don't know, but is it is it a weird thing for him to say?

No?

Right, this man, this man has lost his fucking marbles.

He really is demented.

This is he's lost his marbles and he's president of the United States of Americ guy, We're.

Going to like find him on the side of the highway, like walking barefoot, muttering to himself.

Do you ever hear you know that song by I think it's by Fastball, where it's a song about this couple who they just disappeared, and it's like they're just where, They're just walking off somewhere. You can see their shadows walk wandering off somewhere. It's always summer, They're never like it's just the And it's based on a true story of this old, this elderly couple that just disappeared.

Okay, I'm going to text Afroman and I'm going to have him write a song about this.

Oh, you would love it.

This is like visiting Peapot the nursing home.

This is like, you know, the thing is the way that he speaks. Also, right, he was like, and it's a really wonderful thing, isn't it.

This is Grandpa when there's like.

The world is on fucking fire. But let's keep talking about Lomain. Let's just do that. Let's just keep on talking about I don't know, egg drop once on soup.

So stupid, this person, geopolitical negotiations. I just it's so embarrassing.

It's so embarrassing. And it's just there are no grown ups. Like, there's nobody. Do you know what I'm saying. There's nobody. No one is minding the store. The door is just open. The cash register is just open.

Yeah, that's right.

Just come on in and do what.

Have you We've got Yeah, and it's all our money. It's our money in the cash register. I'm sick about it.

And how much more time do we have?

I mean, the midterms are in November.

So to like at least two more years.

Yeah, but hopefully checks a little bit more checks and balances, like Congress has passed like a record low of bills in the past two years, so soon enough. Did after your Hot Girl Melissa dance party summer, Hopefully after that they'll be a little bit of we're drunken outside, Melissa outside, We'll be right back. We've got an extra special guest.

Welcome back to Brief Recess. We're going to do a deep dive under oath with everyone's favorite celebrity guest. You love her in the comments.

You do lovelamoring, clamoring.

Please welcome our dear friend, Alissa, Missdemeanor. Mayer.

That's not a good nickname.

It's exactly somebody who's never had a misdemeanor.

I want to make that very well.

I'm reserving the rape for any future litigation.

Fair So that makes sense.

Oh, this is great. We've got like an actual client.

We've never actually never needed you. You're on retainer.

I'm fully retained in perpetuit.

That something is bound to happen one day.

One time. Okay, So Alyssa is our good friend. We asked her on the show one time during the pandemic. We were all getting lunch because we're all in lockdown, we couldn't do anything, and we're crossing the street. I'll never forget this I have. We're in the East Village. We're crossing to Tompkins Square Park. Alyssa just walks into the street. Melissa shrieks, She goes. She said, get back here.

You look both ways, Melissa said, the paperwork alone, the paperwork.

That is something you say over.

The paperwork alone would be arduous.

You know why. I'll tell you why. When I was in high school, I was going something with a bunch of friends and one of the kids, the person that I was with, got hit by a bus. Now okay, Well, now this is he got hit by the bus. Not super duper hurt, but it hit him in the shoulder and it kind of like knocked him over and he's fine. No, he's fine, No, he's fine. I had to call nobody wanted nobody wanted to be the one to call his parents.

So I had to do.

And that would happen again, and that would happen again.

Yeah, it was. It was awful. Hi, missus Smith Melissa Malbranch. I don't know, Like he's fine, but you know, Dom got hit by a bus. Tom got hit by a bus. But he's okay.

Yeah.

Sorry.

You know, my mother would blame you somehow, one way or another.

My mom would want you to call some Melissa Alyssa and my mother are very close.

I love her, We go way back.

She would want you to call.

Yeah, well I would find humor, I think, I.

Mean, it would depends, right, how bad is he hurt?

I still think i'd find humor.

Like the bus driver was basically blind. Your son is so enormous. Yeah, I can't believe that.

I don't know what happened. It definitely wasn't his fault, for sure.

He wasn't drunk or anything.

It was nothing to do with it.

Yes, the paperwork alone. And so I thought it would be fun if we did relationship advice. Oh my god, I think it's could be really fun with.

No one warned me.

Okay, wait, we.

Actually needed I had no idea what we were.

I did warn myself because I just made it up.

Okay, perfect.

So I also think we have to clear the record. Alessays, Okay, she's no longer concussed.

I am no longer can cuss.

Okay, straight to camera, please, yes.

I am no longer concussed. In fact, I got past today earlier today. Of hell, I am that of all. Medically, I'm good.

And so this was your second concussion? This year is your third?

Oh okay, it was a third.

People in my defense, Oh, like, what's a year like in this year?

My god?

Twenty six just the one?

You know what? Thank you?

Months you're talking about three? Yeah, and you know what.

The research isn't in yet on whether or not that's bad.

No one has been proven, but it is bad. We know that it's well.

Actually, I found out after I got the third that if I was in school, I would no longer be allowed to play sports, right, Yeah, like kids if they get three concussions are like not allowed to play.

What is it? I don't know, like CBT or something. Now that's cock Andbob t CT.

It's not related, not related.

The NFL and CBT issues CT.

That's what it is.

Yeah, I'm hoping I don't have I don't know why.

What is happening right that you are getting concussions? Okay?

In my defense from what I understood, Okay, this is.

Always whenever she tells you a story, she prefaces it by saying in my defense.

Right, So apparently once you get hit, you can get hit more easily after that.

That's one because you're like dizzy and falling in No.

Well yes maybe, but also like they say that, like your symptoms kind of like settle and then get like revamped when and like, I'm no doctor. I want to make that very clear. I don't actually know what I'm talking about, but this is what I've been told. Okay, this is what the rumor is. Okay, So the first one was like an honest mistake where I was getting in a cab and hit my head. The second one was my death. Perceptions was genuinely off and I hit my head on the counter. It had been like eight months since then, and this time was because in my apartment in Miami, the door is normally opened. My mother is afraid of getting locked on the balcony and so because she has very irrational fears.

The balcony, No she is not.

Is it possible to get locked out?

No it is not.

In fact, the door is a locked so yes, but she is not. She's very much a very strong rule. You cannot you cannot close the door. I had a friend the.

Door is sorry, I'm sorry. This door opened constantly.

Only when you're on the balcony, So if you're on the balcony, the door needs to stay open.

Okay.

I had a friend who was visiting. She closed the door because she thought she was nice to do. I was like, oh, I'll go get something, and I like went and then smacked right into the door.

Thinking a lot of there are a lot of videos like this, like for fail videos.

Luckily there was no one filming, but it was in front of a group of people, not thrilled. Yes, yes exactly, And I would have sued her somehow.

Okay, And so we found out about this. You were driving when you told.

Me where was I driving?

Why was I in Miami?

Oh that makes sense?

Okay, yeah, I made lawyer.

Yeah yeah, but you're feeling better now.

I was in Denver. I was not. I was in my I was not. I was in Denver.

I was always sorry. When was that?

Oh? Yes, and let me tell you something. We took a break to reset for this segment. Alyssa was booking a flight. She was booking it on her phone in the green.

Yeah, So where yous going?

I'm going to Palm Beach for the Lizzie McGuire concerts.

I mean, I'm sorry, it is not are you guys not going to be there? I going to be there?

Actually?

Wait, so Lizzie McGuire as in Miley your No.

Her name is Hillary Duff.

That's right, I'm very much sure.

I'm very much millennial.

I forgot her and don't give a shit about it.

Le McGuire in the concert?

Wait, Hillary Duff? Who was Miley Cyrus?

That even was past my time?

I feel like yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, I didn't really watch that, but I did watch Lizzie McGuire, KP.

Watched Tanna Montana. Is that more than yes?

Okay?

Yeah, Okay, that's her time.

She's twenty five. That's about show.

Okay, yes, it's Hannah. Yeah, okay. And so you just got back from Venice I did, okay, give us the phone.

Slovenia and Croatia, which I was there for two weeks.

How was Croatia?

For?

It was amazing.

I really was a spa for two days, which I really needed because the first few days was my friend's wedding in Venice, and then the second two days was spa and then we went to Sylvenia.

The cute boys at a wedding in Italy where there there were so many Italian.

Yes, like the agents are gorgeous, Like everyone is down.

You ever seen sometimes they'll show you like the hot priests in the Vatican.

I have that calendar.

That's calendar.

That's not I'm going to get you one.

No, no, no, but have you seen the hot priests in the Vatican? I mean, these are.

Beautiful, they're like real priests though, no, no, they're real priests. Okay, yeah, that's crazy.

It was like an interesting I mean, everyone needs.

A reason to find God. If that's your reason, I mean, yeah, reason.

Can't be anymore.

So did you meet any nice boys at.

The I did not well part of us because I feel like I knew everybody there.

It was a very close friend of mine, and I feel like I knew everybody, so I'd already kind of like xed them all gone.

It's not gone through.

Make that clear.

No one there I had ever hooked that with. But I will say I had looked at it and I had had adopted out.

She assessed the situation.

I adopted out.

And also, when you're entering a small community like that, you do one thing with one person.

Yeah, yeah, you cannot go twice like that's no repeats, no doubles. Then, in my defense, I have also I do say that a lot. I'm not realizing I I have not done any I haven't even.

Dipped, so not even a single dip. Not she's fasting. Yeah, yeah, okay, okay. And so you so after that wedding, you needed the break and you had to go to the spot.

Well, I do as well.

Yeah, so we were in Croatia.

I think I slept for four hours in the middle of the day, which was, Oh that's not glorious. Yeah, she's what My new thing in old day is that I love sleep, which is great. I don't know how old, it doesn't.

Matter how old I am is yeah, And then afterwards we went to Sliminia, which was amazing.

What was that like?

So I had never been. I have never heard of anyone who had been.

It was It's very niche.

It's niche Instagram girly, I'm in Slvenia. Come with get ready with me to go?

Come with me? Is that a thing?

I mean I think it is. Now you're really everyone's going to be it's summer.

Yes, it's going to So I went Lubliana is the town, and it like the main town, and that was like the cutest little town. Their whole thing is it's like a dragon town that like it's They say that there's a dragon that lives under the city that like wanted girl. I don't know, just to pretend that I don't. I think that's a legend. I don't know if that's actually true, and.

The comments correct us if it's true, let us know.

I mean maybe I don't know. I didn't meet I didn't meet the dragon, but I was getting in trouble for saying this. It was like it looks like it belonged to I think looked like it.

Belonged to Louiana.

I was giving like Game of Thrones.

I was giving like Game of Thrones, fairy Tale Land, Like I feel like everything in Epcot was trying to look like Leana Tower.

She's like, this looks like it belongs in Vecas.

Yeah, like exactly, Okay.

I feel like people of Slovenia will not like to hear.

No, I know, and I should.

Probably the town would look great in Florida.

What I meant more Phone, I mean.

If you told me that was true, I believe it. No, it was the most like iconic town. People were like, oh yeah, like it's a smaller town. You don't just spend too much time. And I was annoyed that we didn't have more time. I felt like we should have had Like we were thinking just a night out would be fine, and I could have spent like a week there was really really cool.

What's the hot girl summer drink in Slovenia?

Is it?

Like?

I honestly have no idea.

It was like the cocktail that you have because I know every country is like a thing.

Idea was really drinking a little champagne. I feel like so like when in Europe.

Why not?

Ye, yeah, and they are so much cheaper there. Yeah, so I was.

And also after the wedding, I will say I was slowing down a little bit, which was awful.

But then I know, was that a character?

No?

And then we went to like Bled, which was like the most amazing town, like looked Game of Thrones again, like beautiful, and there was this man who was like sitting on the side of the path, I would say, and we was selling these like beautiful paintings for like four euros.

Of course I got like five.

Because because Alyssa can never just do the one thing.

Yes, fair, but but four euros. This man was very talented. He deserved a little bit more.

Plus the fact that when we was a couple of my friends, he was like when we were buying it, he turned it over and painted like right then and there a painting of each of us, like each of us got one.

It was like Alyssa and.

Friends like a picture of me and he was it was so nice, and we were asking him questions like why are you only serving charging four years?

He's like, because I like lived my life.

He is like a full blown person that like now was just like going to town and lived seven kilometers away, was painting people. It was like the most beautiful setting of this like, man, it was just Yes, it was amazing.

So now that's going to go in my apartment. Whenever you come over, you will see it.

Okay, So come to the every time I go to Alissa's house, I'm on plant care, which.

By the way, they're not doing great.

You need to come to the monster up because the last time, didn't you like proved she truly she put me to work. I was wearing gloves and everything. Yeah, and she had me setting up all the plant somehow.

I don't even know where those they're still there.

I don't know where they can climber.

That's the thing about a monster likes to climb.

Yes, that's him, that's him.

Why did you find that?

CJ's a wizard?

What and so did your friends also get one?

Yes?

Oh my god, you just found the guy.

He's really good? Is great?

Oh my god?

Well, I what is his name? I want to like tell his works?

Bobby, b o b Bobby that's his name. Oh my god.

If you have a lost relative, let us know.

I can't believe he just found him. Yes, it was Bobby. But if you're in Slavena in Lake Bled, look for Bobby.

He is amazing.

I'm going to give him a plug.

Well they're going.

Yeah, well we were trying to. The next people came over and we were like, it's ten and he was like, no, it's four.

Like dude, Bobby's ten.

It's ten.

But isn't that like think about that though, Like this man who's super talented, he just wants to share his art, so he's making it a accessible as possible. And we as American people are so trying to disgusting capitals who were like, you're not charging them.

He's like, no, I have healthcare.

It's fine, yeah, literally, do not need the money in any way. I Yeah, so I bought four obviously.

Yes. My mother in fact got one from Mother's Day this morning, so she's very excited. We will see.

So you did this is like a big bonding trip for you and your friends?

Yes, and many people that part of the trip was three of us.

Okay, yeah, And so have you ever done other things with your friends that that was like really bonding as a group.

I don't know, piercings or tattoos or anything anything like I did that with Melissa, that is actually that's true. That's so funny. I think I was there, Yeah, yeah, yeah, do.

You get your nose pierced?

It was your nose, wasn't I having to get it was my nose because I had to get it repierced because it it closed during the pandemic pop out and then whatever, I had to get it redone.

Okay, So here's my favorite part about that. We went to a random tattoo place from that, which, by the way, why did we do that?

Then?

But then the next time we went to Maria No, we did.

This shitty place right, So that place I remember I did it, and I like jolted or some not by much, and I was like, he got really mad and he was like, if you had.

Moved any more, I would have like taken your ear off.

Right, But you're so lucky. I'm so good. You're so lucky. I'm so good. I remember. It was like a douche she got.

And then when we went to Maria Tash they were like, we do this to babies, like that is not true that you like could have moved right, and you were like this guy was was trying to make himself look better. I know, which is why from now ever since then, I will never go anywhere for any of them.

But Maria, it was a good experience at mariotas.

Something that's like right legit, Yeah, because we went to this place and he literally, you know, he was like in this like we did no research, right, We just went it was on bleak, went down these rickety steps.

Yeah, it was like not good. We were all like, yep, we're doing this. We're in at lunch. Uh, in the middle of our lunch. Yeah, in a lunch.

I followed you to just.

So, Yes, I've bonded over a trip to a piercing with me.

Yes, But did you ever bond with a bunch of people and get like matching tattoos?

Oh?

Are you trying to hit that's something I see what's going on?

Literally, Oh no, I see what's going I know what story you're trying to get me to tell. Okay, So I was in Porto. We had a friend, I had a friend in from Australia. I had a friend from London. I we obviously am from the US. We were all together in Porto and we decided this is so cool. We all live in different parts of the world, like we're.

Going to do this every year.

We're going to make sure we do a trip every single year, and we're going to make it so that we get a line for every.

Place that we go to.

And so you were dead, soberly sober absolutely, Yes, for sure in Porto, which is not known for wine.

Wine Portugal.

Yes, And so we went to a place they did not speak English. I had to call my friend who was port and he was like, I don't this man does not understand. He thinks all you're asking for is a line, and I was like, no, that's what we're asking for exactly what. Yes. So we got on the back of our neck and we're like, this is such a great idea. And then the next day we well, not the next day. We were really still into it the next day, and then like a month or two later, it was like a curge all of this, Like there are two ways this goes. One is we get the one line and never again, or we do this and we keep it up and we have a barcode on the back, so there's no way this wins.

And so what ends up happening, of course.

Is that we did the one time never Yes, When did you realize this was maybe a mistake.

Longer than it should have been, like about a month and a half two months later, when people started.

Like making comments, right, what is that?

Well, so Alyssa comes back and she was just like, well I did this thing. And I was like, all right, let me see it, like what is it? And then she shows it to me and I was like why did you do this? And she was like, I don't because I promised that I would, so I couldn't.

And you were like a loyal friend. Yes we did say that, Yes I like it.

But Melissa said she's going to do something. I'll do it. She'll do it, no matter how stupid it is, no matter how much. In the end, she decided that she doesn't really want to do it, but she said she would, so she who was it?

Somebody? In fact, somebody want to I think it was one of you.

But somebody came up with like a new story that I thought was much better, and I started telling this story, but like I would always end up not telling their fruit story every time, so it defeated.

The purpose was that like when you die, it's like the year that you were born and the year that you die.

There's a line in between, and it's the line I got the line in between, and I.

Was like, that's so beautiful.

That sounds like something a drunk person made up.

Yeah, but that's like the story I'm going to tell everyone. But if you never once have I stuck to that one story.

But the other thing about when the dash, there's supposed to be dates between the dash and there's no date, no, no the dash in between?

Where's your birthday? Though?

But where's the date?

Oh?

I see you I should have I'm not gonna do that because youth date on it, right.

But so I don't know who told you this to do this. This is the most ridiculous thing because the whole thing I want to say was what do you I wasn't me.

I think it was not me you to this.

I did not come up with it, not that I'm not that clever.

But the only way to do it if it makes sense that you nineteen whatever dash and then the end day. And the thing about that also is.

That you have to die tattoos posthumously.

Yes, no, I'm not doing that. That's that's what I mean. This is a whole plan is.

Well, I did not tell you to do I did not tell you to do.

Put it in your will. Please finish the top two before.

Totally random thing about people in there in their wills. But the woman who does my hair shout out to Lorraine in her will. She has it that not to straighten her hair smart because she's like really worried that somebody might get over zealous and decide that her hair needs doing.

People do get like they. I have seen it at funerals where people I'm like, that is not the same person who did.

That, right, that person's hair. Yeah, people are frying their hair with the flat iron.

Yeah, well I'm not No, no, just.

People in general. I notice it now, and it's because of Melissa. She talks about We've talked about this, and once you said it, I can't unsee. You can't see it now every time I see is the root.

You can't get rid of the prison, No, you know it is.

It's also like the little curl things that like end up you can never get rid of them.

And there's always one little I mean, uh, a celebrity. I'll tell you who it was after one chunk in the.

Back, see exactly you missed? Yes, and it's still curly.

Yeah, this is what used to happen.

Like in high school, we would all use like really cheap, uh flat irons and our hair looked fried, and I stopped doing it. That's why I like, I'm wearing my hair natural today. It's like my new thing is to not do it looks really great.

Do you have any product in there?

I do with jav And aircream.

Okay, that is my favorite.

Now. It's nice.

It's got like it's got like a little bit of something.

I mean, if I'll bet you if you went to Lorraine, she would like, wavy you up. She's always saying that, how do you wavy? She'll know, She'll know, Lorraine, Yeah, call me, I don't know. We're I'll go with you. I'm bald.

And I sat there and hung out with Yeah.

I love it.

Will do appear.

She's the one who put Remember I want to get a septem piercing.

Wouldn't that because I'm going to come.

I have a perfect place on Bleaker Street.

The stairs on Bleak Wait.

You you had said to you, asked Brad and he said, no, I'm not allowed.

I'm going to be honest. I'm with Brad on this.

I would do it.

For the story. I think it's funny.

I'll get it and then we'll take it out.

What's that stuff?

I'll do it for a couple of photos and then we'll take fine.

Okay, yeah, yeah, do it for the Instagram story of pain? Do you see how I when I mean.

I've heard, I actually heard that the septum is less painful than the nostril because the no, she was looking painful.

But it's like a cartilage versus not.

I feel like I felt to go through every layer.

And I watched it go through it. I was there.

I know I was there. We were all there.

Yes, I don't know. I must have been drunk.

Yeah, why did we go? You went to like why did we go to Maria Tash? Afterwards?

You do it?

Redo it?

I had to redo it, take it. It fell out during the pandemic and then nobody was doing stuff close to the face, so I had to await.

Yeah, speaking of the pandemic, can we pull up the photo again of Alyssa's air conditioner? God, what happened? What happened during the pandemic to Alyssa's air.

CONDI during the pandemic, Yes, it was.

Because we were all on zoom and we facetimed you because you're sure exploded.

And I think I never found out.

I never knew what this was like.

I think it was something like this place by the way, I'm pretty sure it's illegal. I had no I had no heat for two years I lived there, and I like went to them and asked about it, and they were like, we'll get to it. Then of course, two years later was still not getting to it, and then they had this whole thing happened and they were I was like, what went wrong and they were like, I don't know, And then like I never heard that.

What street were you living on? Christopher right?

I remember, Yeah, it was a terrible part.

It was a terrible I also remember that my I was on the phone with my dad, I think, and I was coming in and I like somehow I was on the phone with him and there's a woman was who was going in and she was like, isn't it amazing that we can get into our building and into our apartments just using a credit card. You don't need a key, and you don't need to use our key.

And my dad overhears this and he is like, you need to get out of.

That apartment immediately so dangerous, yes, and she.

Was bragging about it.

She was excited about like, yeah, I never I never bring my keys in this amazing And I was like say this, and then my dad was like, yep, and we're moving and so yeah, yeah he was. So I moved to Brooklyn soon after that, but like he literally was like, it keeps me up at night now knowing that my daughter is so unsafe, like it was a problem.

Do you want to read our dms for us to want to read some reviews all the things people saw us? Okay?

Is it negative?

Yeah? Sending us positives.

The negative ones are really interesting.

Okay, this is tell us from the dms. These are all the wild things y'all send us on the internet. So we're going to get into it with Alyssa. Yeah, extra special guest reader.

Okay.

While I'm too angry and tired to write an eloquent email, okay, I still wanted to reach out to seek both of your guidance, advice input regarding a truly shocking situation involving the school board in my hometown. The board has banned Mother of a Revolution from being performed at the upcoming Spring Wind symphony performance, stating it's indoctrinating students. This from a school that has had us singing religious songs in a church every Christmas. I myself was cast as a Lady of the Night in limis errab my shining moment online only line and play in play making money in your sleep.

Uh so proud.

The instructor has followed the school board's guidelines from the start, but regardless they now have banned it a week frire is this legal? How can I, as a community member help fight back? I include the full meeting here, walk out, walk.

Out, do us sit in protest. That's my advice. That's what I would do.

You would for a spring show, you would actually do that? Okay.

Wether of a Revolution was composed by Omar Thomas for contemporary wind ensembles. Does not have lyrics, soulous and it's about it has to do with trans LGBT issues. It's like a celebration of bravery of trans women.

But it has no lyrics exactly.

Yeah, it's so what's the big How is that in doctrine?

How would they even know what it was about unless you actually did the research exactly.

So it's like it's not like preaching to the children. It's a wind ensemble.

Yes, okay, it was so stupid, so you really would like take it to this absolutely.

When I was in the fifth grade, I staged a protest for what. They closed the playground. I'm not kidding, and I alerted the press and they came. My parents were called. They had a with the superintendent about you don't don't fuck with me even in the fifth grade. Yeah, yeah, keep swinging bitches, you can't hit me.

Wait, but she asked, is this legal? Is it legal?

I mean if the school board decided yeah, yeah, okay, And then.

She says, how can I, as a Communian member help fight back.

That fight back?

Ye?

Walk out? I think there was also there was a walk out a similar situation this week. Oh wow, of a song that was I guess there's a lot of trans orchestra music happening lately. Maybe this is the same situation, but maybe Yeah, but they they also all the kids walked out.

Oh I love headline, Yes that, I love I love kids teaching adults, yes, yes, yes, say.

Of the bringing back Peter Pan all of a sudden.

Anyway, okay, please, I can't either the incessant giggling.

So tiring.

Are you constantly?

I mean, I'm sorry. We have a good time and we like each other.

God for we experienced joy.

Is their happiness here? That's not okay, that's.

A problem.

Expressions of joy.

Maybe that's something to look internal.

Okay.

The next one could not get through the first one. I tried car buying. She repeats her privileged status and he brags about blowing through money.

Okay, let me just say something about that. Does this me? Right? Yeah? Yeah, So I think we were talking about I know, I do remember. I think it was like, oh, how are you like what happened to you this weekend? And I said, I have a bone to pick with the car industry, right, And I said that I'm going to complain about something.

But I know this sounds privileged. I know that it's privileged. And my problem that day was I had gone to buy a car and I could not understand why it took off fucking day, right, And what I wanted to make clear was like, yes, well, I was annoyed to how long it took. I also understood that I was lucky to be in the position. That's what I was trying to say this apparently pissed this person up. I'm fucking sorry.

Okay, that's like you know that there's always somebody worse off, Like there's like that saying that people say when like ever you have any like you're not allowed to have any complaints anything bad in your life if you are in.

A position of privilege, which is obviously not true.

Right, you can also be aware that there are people who are worship scenario, then still be okay, R comfortable.

That was the point that I was trying to make. Yes, I'm sorry if you were so offended.

By yes, yes, especially if you started with I know I'm coming from a place of privilege.

Yes, and this is whatever that pissed this person off more than anything.

Yes, Yes, I mean I don't have a car, but it's fine.

On a show.

And oh my god, is there a negative of me?

I'd like to leave a review of the three of us in our friendship. Oh my god, I have a memorialized in a text message.

This is Can you send me a seasoned desist?

No, I did send you.

A real one.

We'll pull that up. The season desist I had to work.

Oh I still have it.

Okay, it was Basically, she took me to a sample sale and dragged me there and I was like, my friend, I was like, I don't really want to go, but you're like, I promise there's men's clothing.

Oh right, And there was gotten there all the way there and.

It was all women's clothing. And I sent you a season decision.

Said, and you said something about that I owed you Skittles for life or something.

Yeah, are they?

Yeah?

Yeah, no, I'm any minute, any minute.

I'll eat anything. Stop this.

Earlier there was a full season desist. I kept it.

I notized, Yeah, I.

Think I was, wasn't I the witness?

Yeah?

Yeah, yeah. Okay, so this is from twenty nineteen. Of us were attempting around the time to go somewhere and do something, and some of us were upstairs, some of us were downstairs, and we're trying to just coordinate getting out, literally out the door of someone's apartment. Okay, text f for Melissa. This on the group chat. Alyssa Meyer says, downstairs, coming up, Melissa. Albranch says, how are you getting there?

Alissa says with you. Melissa says, okay, I'm coming up. Alyssa says, will come down. Now. Alissa says, I'm down. Melissa says, omg, the two of you are going stuck them down in the elevator trying to find each other.

I don't know. I mean, I don't remember, but yeah, I'm sure it happens.

With each other.

You remember them? No, oh, okaye, each other.

You're probably in the same elevator car. I'm on my way up. I'm coming down. I just got I just got up.

Well, what I think is funny is like my anger is so predictable. I like, I get so bissed off and I'm like, you know what, fuck the both of you?

Oh my god.

Yeah, especially because it's so easy for me to cancel plans and be like, I don't want to do this.

Come back.

The number of times I've tried to see a Broadway show with you and you're like, is it past five o'clock?

Yes, every Broadway show is past five o'clock.

No, it's some of them, Like I don't like it when they started eight.

Yeah, it's like a really big intention, but you don't see the show.

Well, I have to tell you. What's really interesting is like I think at least once I've given my ticket away a ticket that I've paid for.

Because I'm not doing this.

Because immediately I start thinking about time. What time am I going to get out? Yeah, I gotta take the train by the time I get home, you know what. Never mind, you do have a good time.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, No, I think I might have been at that show you gave your ticket away.

I'm pretty sure I had to bring.

Somebody else with you. I want to I want to read this. I want to read this because I think it's really really funny. I do love both these people. They're so smart and funny. The three stars. They gave us three stars. By the way, the three stars is because it's so unc comfortable to listen to as a white dude. Michael clearly has a lot more power and privilege in the world acknowledge. But in the friendship, it's all Melissa.

I'm not sure.

I'm not sure she actually likes Michael, and it seems and it seems like Michael is full of nervous laughter waiting to be dragged by her. I am uncomfortable.

Yeah, okay, I will say.

Beautiful, beautiful, thank you what an mpath.

Beautiful because you're the victim in the situation.

You love that Okay.

But here's the thing.

One of the best things about you is all of your one liners that I have used to take notes on.

Do you remember that?

Okay, go kick rocks, kick rocks, no socks. You are welcome, wanting and invited.

I say that all the time.

Yes, something about.

Behind God's bag, when when God was a child.

When God was I've been around since God was a child. Something about lipstick, like when you pack your lipstick or something. I have them all written down.

Mother has lived ship.

Yeah, that happens. Yeah, that happens. Behind God's back is my favorite.

Or like when something is far away, I'm like I don't want to go there, and you're like why because behind God on not going.

Yeah.

So thank you for joining us. We're gonna wrap up. Do you have anything you want to plug anyone?

Yeah? Bobby in.

A shout out to Bobby, Bobby Boy and Slovenia. Watch out, you're about to get a surge of activity.

He's in Lake bled Bobby and Slovenia.

A lot of people who give us three stars are going to be listening and wanting to get their portraits painted.

Yes, four euros. It might have gone up in the instance.

Then lead us out, tell everyone that the show's over and that they should have a great week.

Have a great week. The show is now over. Time to find the next episode.

We'll see you a card thank you for joining us on.

The line.

This has been an Exactly Right production recorded at iHeart Studios, hosted by me, Michael Foot and.

Me Melissa Albrant. Our producer is CJ. Ferroni.

This episode was edited by Nicholas Galucci.

Our associate producer is Christina Chamberlain, and our guest booker is Patrick Cootner.

Our theme song was composed by Tom Brifogel with artwork from Charlotte Delarue Manessa Lilac, with photography by Brad Obono.

Brief Recess is executive produced by Karen Kilgareff, Georgia hart Stark, and Danielle Kramer.

You can find me on Instagram at Department of Redundancy Department or on TikTok at Michael Foot and.

I'm on both Instagram and TikTok as Melissa Albranch.

Got legal questions, reach out at Brief Recess at exactlyrightmedia dot com. Listen to Brief Recess on the iHeartRadio app Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts, and of course we're a podcasts with video. Search for Brief Recess on YouTube

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