S10E24: DIVERSIFYING THE PORTFOLIO OF "YOU" after stroke.

0:00 My beautiful survivors, how are you? This is Karina, the host and creator behind Stroke Surviving the Odds. The podcast. The mission of the show is really to help survivors move forward from the stroke, learn to reclaim their lives and their identity. In Stroke Surviving the Odds, it's a space where we go beyond survival and we step into what's possible after stroke. Remember that if I can do it after 28 years, so can you. I suffered a brain stomach dissection in 1999. I was 25 years old.

0:38 It led me to coma Interlochen syndrome. As you can see, I'm very much here today, sharing all my tricks, hacks, how to's, how I got to survive this world as a stroke survivor. So I'm extremely grateful that you are here. I want to remind you to grab a pen and paper because the faintness of ink is better than the best memory. Before we start officially today's show, I would like to do a little bit of clean house.

1:09 Remind you that the show is audio on Spotify, iTunes, Apple, and Google Podcast. It is video on Fridays. I have a wonderful guest, so I always put it on YouTube. The link is going to be in the description, but I have a little bit of extra for you guys. I have a new concept where I'm going to be posting shorts all week long on YouTube.

1:37 So not only going you're going to have the pleasure of having the audio, but you're going to also have support in the video. And that way you also get to know who's talking to you. So I'm really, really looking forward to that. What do you say we get today's show on the road? Put the podcast on pause, Go get yourself a drink.

1:59 Don't forget your pen and paper. Come and meet me here as we are recording today's show. And before I forget, guys, please share the episode. You know what? Share with Sugar Bear, share with everybody that is a stroke survivor, caregiver that is not a stroke survivor. There is something in the episode for everybody.

2:21 The success of the show is really a team effort. Guys. I'm just the voice behind the show, but you guys are the motor. You guys are participating and feeding and making me just bloom a little bit more. So by sharing, not only is the algorithm going to bring everything to the forefront and in reality, screw the algorithm, the movement of stroke survivors is stronger than an algorithm. We don't want to rely on technology or a robot to make life great.

2:57 So just share the podcast. That means more people around Earth is going to be helped. All right, bear with me guys. Today the topic is going to be diversifying the portfolio of you. Oh boy, what a mouthful. When we hear the word portfolio we often think of four O 1 KS and finances. And I was doing the dishes before and thinking how can we rebuild ourselves?

3:37 Like I mentioned in the intro, how can you rebuild your life? All that is your portfolio. All that is insight. Your life is your portfolio and I want you to rebuild it. So today we're going to talk identity, purpose, income, healing, and control. All of these things are needed in order for you to rebuild life after stroke.

4:06 Yes, and we know that people, people lose so much more than the the capability of walking or of talking. Stroke survivors lose careers, they lose their role. Maybe the identity of a specific person was the fact that they were the professional in their field. That was the biggest identity of them and now they can't perform there so it's all it's all went to shit.

4:48 Maybe the person that had the stroke is a provider and now he can't go to work. His wife has to go to work and provide for the family. So never mind the sorry about that. That's my little dog, Einstein. He's a Yorkie terrier and he's very vocal. So at some point you're sure to be hearing him behind me.

5:18 So as I was saying, people have their identities and many things. It could be a professional identity. It could be providing identity at home. It could be the parent doesn't feel like a parent anymore because they can't play ball with their kids anymore. But today we're going to try to reframe all that. OK.

5:44 And you're not just one role. I want to make it clear that you are not just one specific role. Not because a part of you collapsed, Not because your brain had the stroke and it screwed up many other things. That it means that you are done. Nope. Many parts of yours still very much there. And that's what I want to explore today. I love today's episode because it's really, really about control, about taking over what is yours. And by reframing, I know stroke survivors, we compare a lot to the way you were or you compare your case to someone else's case and it's not the case.

6:39 So today I really, really want to focus on allowing you to see that there's a different way. So this segment here, I would like you to take your pen and paper again, pause the podcast if you need to take notes, take your time. There's no rush. OK, so 1st instead of saying I can't do XY and Z like I used to, that's a common phrase in stroke survivors, right? I hear it all the time.

7:18 How about you try reframing it into? I wonder what I can do now? Can I do this now? Not the same as before, but differently. Or ask what's something that I could add to what I used to do to make it work better? Be curious, you know a stroke is a second chance. Guys, I know you hate me for saying that. And the only reason why I feel confident telling you this right now is because I've done my share of crying 28 years ago. I've done my share of bitching and complaining and frustration and everything that you might be feeling right now that I know you are feeling.

8:12 I've done it. There's light at the end of the tunnel. OK, So again, instead of saying I can't do it like I used to, please try to say how can I do it now? That goes in adaptation. You know, I'm always saying you're a chameleon. Be a chameleon, OK? I also want you to think of the possibilities that are out there.

8:44 I'm going to give you a few concrete examples to make it clear. OK, so if you are a speaker either in public or on a podcast or on different forms, you are a speaker plus your life experience. You can very much become an an advocate, a prevention advocate, life after advocate. Now if you put empathy and listening, you could be coaching, you could be a coach.

9:31 A many of you are there to help each other, but we are. So the stroke did something that it makes it so how can I say self absorbed? It it it, it, it didn't destroy, but it fucking bothered everything, right. So if you're a good listener and you have empathy, you can become a coach. If you like to write and you like to hear, well, maybe you could become a writer.

10:09 These things, I know so many people put a book out there because I know that that's the first thing I wanted to do when I came home from the rehab. So many of us want to write a book, but once the book is written, you can't just leave it on your shelf. You can't just be giving your copies away. Once the book is written, you have to really work hard to get your message out, and that is where you can become an advocate.

10:45 Things don't happen by magic, guys. I told you that it it happens when there's action, whether it's good or bad, it doesn't make a difference. As long as there is some sort of action, you're going to figure out the rest. What I just talked about right now should be giving you hope. It's not false promises.

11:09 Hope is followed by action. Hope is not magic. There's action behind hope that if one person can do it, another one can. When I have guests on my show, if you don't want to listen to me saying that if I can't do it, you can do listen to my guests, guys. They are proof that you get to move on no matter your stage of survival. The funny thing is, I'm always talking about how we talk to ourselves, how we think to ourselves and how to change our own narrative.

11:59 And I'm going to give you a very light example because if you're like me and we talk finances, my body cringes. So I'm going to just give you 2 examples to reframe, OK? You can put finance reframe, and underneath I'll give you an example. If you have one income, you're vulnerable. But when you have two incomes in the house, you become more stable.

12:32 So instead of saying I'm broke, you could say, you see, I'm feeling fucking vulnerable right now because I can't afford this and that, and it's bothering me. But once you have two incomes and I'm going to make a special episode and I'm going to be helping you guys with things that stroke survivors with physical limitations can do from home very easily.

12:55 OK. But for today, this is the topic. Now, if we take the word diversify, who if we take the word diversify, is diversifying you? Well, if we take the word, diversity means that you are not just relying on one specific identity for validation and you are not seeking validation from everybody else. Diversification means also that you are not tying your worth to your productivity.

13:43 Oh my God, Ding Ding, Ding, Ding, Ding. Let me repeat this because I know how big this is for stroke survivors. True. Do not tie your worth to your productivity, OK? And you guys all know my story that when I left, when I left my life a few years back, I needed emotional stability. I didn't need the financial stability.

14:20 I didn't need this. I, I, I, I didn't have it, but I didn't want it. For me, what was important was building my internal stability. And I've been working and I finally am emotionally stable in my life, in who I am and in my relationship with my life. That is huge. So if anybody out there, if any of you feel frustration and you feel like you have limitations, you feel like you have identity loss, you are constantly comparing yourself to anybody else. The handle stroke and probably your loved ones are comparing you also.

15:13 That's bullshit, but that's a whole different episode. OK, so I want you to not tie your worth to your productivity, OK? You take your time, you do you. Fuck the rest, you do you. So this concludes today's episode. But guess what? I have something else to tell you. I am super, super stoked about this, guys.

15:43 Now I have a program, I have a course that is upcoming. It's called Healing Starts at Home. Yeah, after rehabilitation. That's where the real fucking work starts, guys. So this is really Healing Starts at Home is a course that's designed to support the stroke survivors in rebuilding life after stroke.

16:10 It focuses on practical emotional lifestyles tools. Oh, lifestyle tools. Wow, that's a tongue twister. Guys. I want you to regain independence. I want you to regain confidence. So in the course, you're going to learn how to rebuild your identity. You are definitely going to learn how to create a healing environment at home.

16:36 We're going to talk nutrition, daily habits. This is not this is an ongoing thing. This is not going to happen every overnight. We're going to talk medication awareness and self advocacy. In case you were wondering, mental and emotional resilience. These two babies go together, guys. So I am extremely, extremely stoked about this one.

17:01 So anyone who wants to know a little bit more about this upcoming course, please send me a e-mail at klemireconsultant.com. I'm going to give you my coordinates in the description. So guys, this is what I have for you today. I hope you enjoyed today's episode. I hope you took notes, all kinds. Don't forget to like, follow, subscribe, ring the bell on YouTube and don't forget to share with Sugar Bear guys. It's important, OK?

17:37 Remember how much I love you. And this is only the beginning. I will talk to you soon. Bye.