FULL SHOW: Break Room Romeo Date, Jeff’s Busted Birthday + Brooke Goes to the Club (10/21/26)

0:00 Oh, I cannot wait for you guys to hear the story about how Jeff got suckered into working on his birthday at a place that he's not employed, mind you.

0:09 Jeff always has a sad birthday story.

0:12 Yes. Every year. It's a brand new what's on your mind.

0:17 Oh, my God.

0:17 And I went to the club and I cannot wait to tell you guys. It has been a hot minute. I don't even think people say hot minute anymore.

0:24 It's been a hot minute. I mean, it's not that outdated. You're okay with that one.

0:27 Thanks.

0:27 Thanks.

0:27 We've got a brand new full hour for you that also includes a brand new second date.

0:31 We've got laser stories on the way, but we'd love to start with your comments. What do you see, Alexis?

0:35 Yeah.

0:36 Joy Marcia said, so I'm a native English speaker currently learning French. I recently engaged a native French speaker to be having chat sessions with every week.

0:46 Okay.

0:47 So this French girl I chat with last week told me to be thinking of something that happened during the week I can share in French during our chat session, and you guys immediately came to my mind.

0:56 So I also have my what's on your mind moment, guys. There you go. Ooh la la. That's it for the French thoughts.

1:04 Did you realize that was French?

1:06 Dude, I took two semesters of French in college, and they were a disaster for me. Oh, I took French, too. All I remember is the alphabet, though.

1:13 I didn't even get to learn the alphabet. They were like, we're going to do immersion French. I'm like, we're in Montana, and I'm only here one hour a day.

1:20 How is this going to work? Okay, hence the ooh-la-la.

1:22 Yeah, yeah.

1:23 It did work well. So I apologize to all our French speakers. I'm glad you're here. You're smarter than us.

1:28 Yeah, you are.

1:29 Let's do it. Your full hour starts now.

1:31 This year, the most popular Halloween costume for seniors could be a wet blanket.

1:38 A wet blanket?

1:39 It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

1:41 And seniors as in, like, old people?

1:43 That's right.

1:44 Or seniors in high school?

1:45 Old people.

1:46 Oh.

1:47 I say that because a new poll just asked adults of all ages if they were going to do anything to celebrate Halloween this year.

1:53 Oh.

1:53 And overall, less than 40% said yes.

1:56 Oh.

1:59 So I'm going to ask Alexis, what percent of Gen Zers do you think said they're celebrating this year?

2:04 I mean, does celebrating mean you have to go out or can you just like watch a movie and call that celebrating?

2:09 Typical Gen Z to ask a question to the question that I asked. I just asked for a percentage.

2:17 I mean, if it's going out, less than 50. If it's just celebrating, over 80.

2:21 Okay. The answer is 55% of Gen Z. She's like, did you eat.

2:27 A piece of cake?

2:28 It's just too expensive to go out and drink right now, so that's why.

2:30 But if it's a free movie, okay, anyways.

2:33 With the excuses all added in, 55% of Gen Zers say they're going to celebrate Halloween. Then I'll ask Jose, hopefully more concisely, what percent of millennials are celebrating Halloween?

2:45 I'm going to say it's barely under.

2:47 I'm going to go with 48%. It's actually higher than Gen Z. 61% of millennials are partaking.

2:56 They all have kids. They have kids. Guardians.

2:58 Well, after that, there's a huge drop-off. Brooke, what percentage of Gen Xers are getting spooky with it? I didn't ask you that. I said what percent of Gen Xers are.

3:08 I think Gen Xers are tough. They like to beer bong still 75%.

3:12 Remember the part where.

3:13 I said there's a huge drop-off with the Gen Xers? Also a huge drop-off in hearing with the Gen Xers, too. Only 32% of them are going to be celebrating Halloween, and just 17% of boomers. are going to do Halloween this year.

3:30 My mom is so into Halloween. She gets a new animatronic every year. And this one is so creepy, you guys. It looks like that girl crawling up the stairs from that one movie.

3:39 Oh, yeah.

3:41 It's so creepy.

3:41 Clueless?

3:42 Yikes. But most of them say they have no objections to celebrating Halloween. It's just it had to do with other factors, either money, like Alexis said, being too busy, or being lazy.

3:55 Yeah, that's it.

3:56 But at least we're getting 100% participation during the shot caller question of the day.

4:01 Whether we want to or not.

4:03 Even the boomers are doing it because boomers love the silky smooth sounds of Jake's voice. Give the grannies what they want, J-Town. Well, it's quite a day for famous divas.

4:15 Okay, I love famous divas.

4:18 Kim K turns 46. Doja Cat turns 31.

4:21 What?

4:23 And Notorious Bad Girl Judge.

4:26 Judy turns 84.

4:30 One's famous for shaking her booty, one's famous for showing her booty, and one's famous for telling people to sit their booty down. Three women who've built million dollar empires by making sure everybody knows who's in charge. And that's why today we're celebrating these birthday queens with a special sexy ladies edition.

4:53 Of Plenty of 20.

4:56 Here's how it's going to go. You say a number 1 through 20. I'll give you a question about one of the three bombshells I just mentioned. Kim K, Doja C, or Judge J?

5:07 Okay.

5:08 You just have to answer correctly and you can stay in the game. Let's begin with the woman who's jealous of the slight curves on Judge Judy's robe.

5:15 That's Alexis. She could never.

5:18 Three.

5:19 Kim Kardashian has a bizarre beauty routine involving her jewelry. What does she do before putting it on? Does she A, put it in the freezer? No. B, rub it with Vaseline. C, clean it with toothpaste. Or D, blow it dry with a hair dryer.

5:37 I mean, first of all, I think you mean her assistant does this, not her.

5:41 Her makeup artist?

5:43 Putting toothpaste on it.

5:45 Why would her jewelry be wet?

5:47 No, slimy, because it has Vaseline on it. Is it shiny?

5:51 I don't know.

5:52 The cold would just feel good.

5:53 Yeah.

5:54 Like maybe she read some health thing in it, like, I don't know, I'm going to go put it in the freezer.

5:59 Alexis says put it in the freezer. It's actually the opposite. She blows it dry with a hair dryer because she dislikes the feeling of cold jewelry against her skin.

6:08 That actually makes sense.

6:09 That is such a diva thing, but that makes sense.

6:11 Get this necklace off of me.

6:13 Oh, the diamonds are freezing.

6:14 The struggle we all know.

6:17 Brooke, it's your turn.

6:18 Three is off the board.

6:19 Okay, six.

6:21 Brooke, Judge Judy reportedly makes $ 47 million a year.

6:25 A year.

6:26 And the only thing she likes more than cold, hard cash is time off. How many days a year does she work over or under 30 days?

6:38 30's the bar? Oh, my God.

6:41 $ 47 billion a year.

6:43 What the heck?

6:45 She figured it out, man.

6:47 She did.

6:48 I think that she's. Boss lady, give me less. Less than 30.

6:52 Brooke's saying under 30 days. That's incorrect. It's just over. 52 days a year she works translates to about $ 900, 000 per working day.

7:04 Oh, my gosh.

7:05 We're talking sexy ladies, Kim Kardashian, Doja Cat, and Judge Judy. No one's gotten any questions right yet. Jose, how about a number? 15.

7:13 15.

7:14 At the 2023 Met Gala, Doja Cat gave one of the weirdest red carpet interviews ever.

7:19 Yeah, she's weird, but I love that about her.

7:21 Answering every question by doing what? Was she making dolphin noises? Was she burping? Was she doing a.

7:29 Possessed demon voice?

7:32 Or was she meowing?

7:33 Oh my gosh.

7:35 I mean, I now am starting to remember her red outfit because it's in Fortnite.

7:41 And so it was, it must've been demon theme. So I'm gonna go with possessed demon voice.

7:47 Jose thinks he was demon cat.

7:48 She was not.

7:51 She answered every question with a meow.

7:53 It was a meow.

7:55 She was dressed to resemble a cat from a famous fashion designer.

7:57 Did have to do with the costume though.

8:00 We're still over. Jeffrey, it's your turn. Three, six and 15 are off the board. Growing up, Kim Kardashian was in the limelight early on. Her dad was a famous lawyer and was friends with Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie. She even celebrated her 14th birthday at a famous place. What was it? Was it A, Disneyland rented out by her parents for her and her friends?

8:22 I would be so mad.

8:23 I love the stories of these self-made millionaires.

8:26 Was it B, the Playboy Mansion?

8:30 Hmm.

8:31 Was it C, Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch?

8:34 Oh, no, it's getting worse, Jake.

8:36 Or is it D, at a bowling alley, but the lanes have velvet ropes and bottle service?

8:41 That's the safest location.

8:43 She's 14.

8:44 She can't have bottle service at 14.

8:47 She's Kim Kardashian, bro.

8:48 And they could be glass bottles of Coca-Cola or Sprite. There you go. Don't judge. Let's see. Was Kim K a Michael Jackson fan?

8:57 It's just like running out of theme park, right? with a lot more animals.

9:01 And if you were going to do that, you would use Disneyland as the better theme park to rent.

9:06 Yeah, better rides.

9:06 Rent out the whole place for your 14th birthday.

9:08 That is so cool.

9:09 Maybe they couldn't get it, so they had to settle it.

9:12 Yeah, I think my high school was doing our prom night on the Disneyland thing, so that's why she probably had to take her birthday at the Playboy Mansion.

9:21 Jeffrey says Playboy Mansion. Kim had her birthday at the Neverland Ranch, which she later described as a magical experience.

9:31 I bet it was. I bet that place was cool when you're a girl.

9:35 Please clip that. Brooke loves Neverland Ranch.

9:41 I've done the math and everybody lost today's Valencia 20, which means I win.

9:47 All right.

9:48 Well, since Jake wins, you get to choose who gets shocked, and they're going to sing Say So by Doja Cat. Who's it going to be?

9:54 It's got to be Brooke.

9:55 For the pro Neverland Ranch comments?

9:57 Maybe.

9:58 Okay.

9:59 Didn't even notice, no punches left to roll with.

10:03 You got to keep me focused.

10:05 Wow!

10:06 I didn't like that for one second.

10:09 No.

10:09 Not at all.

10:10 Those were your shock collar questions of the day.

10:13 Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

10:18 As we all get older and our memory fades, someday we might need to resort to hypnotism just to jog our brains about what happened over the weekend.

10:29 Oh, yeah.

10:29 What did I do?

10:30 I don't know, actually.

10:31 That's why I met up with a hypnotist on Friday.

10:34 Oh.

10:35 And I have no idea if it helped me recover any memories. I just know whenever I hear the word chicken, I regain consciousness and my pants are off. So someone's going to have to say the magic word if they want to know what's on my mind. We're going to do that coming up right now. It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning and quick inspirational message to start the day. Remember, if almonds can become milk. then you can be anything.

11:06 Wow.

11:06 Why is that kind of motivating?

11:09 Let's keep that mentality as we get into What's On Your Mind. We go around the room to find out what each member of the show has been thinking about lately, starting with Brooke. Brooke, what's on your mind?

11:18 Well, it's been a minute, but your girl went to the club on Friday.

11:23 Wow.

11:25 Yes.

11:25 Club now.

11:26 Club.

11:26 Yeah, yeah.

11:27 Senior's day.

11:28 Woo-hoo.

11:29 3 p.m.

11:30 Entry.

11:31 You joke, but I went with my.

11:34 Girlfriends to a special type of club called the Early Birds Club.

11:38 Oh, no.

11:39 Oh, my God.

11:40 We ruined it. I didn't know.

11:41 And the tagline is for people who have ish to do in the morning. Wow.

11:45 This is actually brilliant.

11:47 So it goes from 6 to 10 p.m., okay?

11:50 That's perfect.

11:51 And my girlfriend's like, we got to get there right when it opens. I'm like, what? You're supposed to show up late.

11:55 Well, you only got four hours.

11:57 She's not wrong.

11:59 So we show up, and it's us and one 65-year-old woman there.

12:03 Good for her.

12:04 Let's go. Let's go.

12:05 But we don't let that stop us. And I'm just thinking, I'm chalking it up to, like, this is a funny night. You know, like, this is a funny experience.

12:13 We tried. Y'all, by 645, this place is slammed. And all women. I danced for four hours straight. I sweated so hard.

12:23 Oh, wow.

12:24 Gross.

12:25 But the glorious thing about being in a club, I've never experienced this before, with not one single dude there.

12:31 You felt comfortable?

12:32 Dude, yeah.

12:33 I didn't get my leg humped once.

12:35 Oh, wow.

12:36 There was no mysterious odor coming from anywhere.

12:39 Oh, yeah.

12:40 You were sweating quite a bit, you said.

12:42 No, it didn't stink, though.

12:43 It was so different.

12:44 Oh, not a mysterious one. A familiar odor.

12:47 Gotcha.

12:48 Yeah, you know when you go through a club and you're.

12:49 Like, what is that?

12:51 That didn't happen. That didn't happen. We could set our drinks down wherever. we wanted.

12:56 Brooke, I think you discovered it's not the age. I think we just need to take all men out of clubs. And that's the fun.

13:02 It was so fun.

13:03 Singing at the top of my lungs, dropping it.

13:06 Low-ish, and getting out of there.

13:09 By 10 p.m.

13:10 As long as I don't need to laugh.

13:11 Oh my god, I was so sore the next morning. So anyway, if anyone wants to go to the club with me, I'll be there at 6 o'clock.

13:18 Dang. What a time. Jose, what's been on your mind?

13:23 Well, recently I got into an Uber and I started talking to the driver who.

13:27 Was this lovely lady with lots of charisma.

13:30 Like immediately you get good energy. And we're making small talk and she mentions to me that she just moved to the city a few months ago. So I'm like, well, what brings you here?

13:40 Work?

13:41 And the good vibes stop.

13:43 What?

13:43 She just goes... Ugh, Jose.

13:46 What?

13:47 And then I'm like, wait a minute. You didn't move for work. You moved for a person, didn't you?

13:54 Oh.

13:54 And she goes, yes.

13:55 So this launches a huge story about her moving for love.

13:59 Yeah, yeah. And then they.

14:01 Literally broke up a month after she moved her whole life here for them. Like, total a-hole move, right?

14:07 It sounds like she needs a club of all women that are floating over the pond.

14:10 True.

14:11 She does. So I start feeling bad.

14:15 And so I'm like, it's pep talk time, right?

14:17 I'm going to help this girl.

14:18 So I tell her, you know, I'm like, you know what? The universe moved you here. Do you like it here?

14:22 She's like, yeah.

14:23 And I'm like, that's the thing. You don't need the person.

14:26 Oh, that's good.

14:26 Look at you. Spreading some wisdom, some positivity.

14:29 You're going to find something. You're going to look back on this and you're going to be so happy you're here. I'm like, well, what are you doing for work? And she's like this.

14:36 I drive 10 hours of Ubers a day.

14:38 I am short $ 200 on my rent and it's due tomorrow.

14:42 And this was at night. This is a late at night ride that I'm taking. So I feel bad.

14:48 So we park and I reach into my wallet and I always have some extra cash on me. And I give her a big hug and I'm like, whatever.

14:54 I feel like I did good.

14:57 And so then later I go in and I go to rate her and it reminds me that She was driving a Tesla Model Y.

15:04 Oh.

15:05 And then I look and I'm like, wait a minute. It's not the first of the month. It's like the middle of the month right now.

15:11 Her rent can't be due.

15:12 How could her rent be only like $ 200 short now? When I realized there was nothing like unput together about her.

15:19 Did you look at the history and it said she's done 5,000 drives? I didn't.

15:24 I just.

15:25 I didn't just move here.

15:26 So I'm like, did I get scammed or did I not? Or did I just help somebody?

15:29 Maybe both are true.

15:30 You bet.

15:31 I could have helped a scammer.

15:33 Yes.

15:34 There you go.

15:35 Alexis, what's been on your mind?

15:36 So I've been to a lot of weddings.

15:38 And, you know, after you go to a lot, some of them can kind of start to be the same.

15:41 Oh, wow.

15:42 You're finally there. No offense to my friends.

15:44 Love you guys.

15:46 But I went to one the other day that had some different things about it.

15:49 Oh.

15:49 So I wanted to share a wedding inspo.

15:51 Okay.

15:51 What was different?

15:52 New trends, right?

15:52 So first, you get there, yes, and there's a pony with a basket on it full of buzz balls, like the alcohol.

15:57 Oh.

15:58 That's awesome. It's walking around the party.

16:00 Serving alcohol.

16:02 Serving bad alcohol.

16:03 Yes.

16:03 Exactly.

16:04 Does that pony have a liquor license?

16:07 I don't know.

16:07 Don't ask questions.

16:09 Then we get to when we're sitting down and they're doing the speeches. And they have two people holding a sign for the crowd, imagine. And one says laugh and one says applause.

16:17 Oh, like cue cards.

16:18 Yes.

16:18 And any time it's about the groom, it's laugh.

16:20 Ah.

16:21 And anytime it's about the bride, it's applause. That's kind of funny.

16:25 It was.

16:26 I thought it was a nice touch.

16:27 It's like a studio audience.

16:28 And then also, instead of standing up there and just talking about the story of how they met and how in love they are, blah, blah, blah, they did a parody.

16:35 Song to tell how they met.

16:37 They remixed Party in the USA and sung about how they met.

16:41 Wow.

16:41 Much more engaging, I will say. I think you love the parody because you had the buzz balls to begin with.

16:46 Yeah.

16:46 It's probably a thanks to the pony.

16:48 If you get remarried, use the camel as your pony.

16:50 Yes.

16:51 And you and your husband can do a duet.

16:53 People were drunk enough, by the way. All right, Jeffrey, what's on your mind?

16:56 So I went out to a bar for my birthday this past weekend. And as I'm waiting for friends to show up, I order a glass of wine. And the bartender is super old. like easily over 80.

17:10 Okay.

17:10 And he starts chatting with me and he's like, yeah, it's my first day. Uh, I had, I had to get this job in order to pay bills. And this is the, like one of the only places that's hiring old people.

17:24 Is this the father of the Uber driver that Jose had?

17:27 Or they both?

17:28 Possibly.

17:29 And meanwhile, he's pouring my wine and it is not going well.

17:33 How could you not score white?

17:35 Well, it's not making it in the glass. His hands are a little too weak for the bottle of wine. So I see him. I'm like, hey, do you want me to do that for you? Like, I can help. He hands me the bottle of wine and I pour my own glass. And so he's like, oh, wow, that's sure nice of you. Do you know how to make an old fashioned perchance? So I'm like, no way. Yes, I do know how to make one. And I'm telling him, like, it's bourbon and bitters. You could do, like, a sugar cube.

18:07 He's like, why don't you come over here and do it?

18:09 Behind the bar?

18:10 Yeah, so now I'm doing his job, and it's my birthday.

18:14 Did he tip you out at all?

18:16 Didn't get any. Any cut of the mile.

18:18 Did you have to pay for your wine?

18:19 I did. I tipped him for me making my own drink. Text in 78592. Tell us what's been on your mind. It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning, and we're getting dangerously close to Halloween. One of our biggest shows of the entire year, where we all dress up and pick out a group costume together.

18:39 People on the text board are still talking about Brooke's ideas that she pitched. One guy said, y'all are haters. Brooke's costume ideas are superior. Also, Will Ferrell characters, FTW.

18:53 Yeah.

18:54 Who needs that?

18:56 Pitch that one year yeah brooke did that's right it was one year do you not listen to anything all everyone.

19:02 Has been saying is serial killer serial killer serial.

19:04 Killer that's all i remember yeah and ftw i think it's more like wtf but.

19:08 That's okay both can be true you got one before you.

19:12 Have one person in your corner brooke and fyi they didn't spell haters costumes or ideas.

19:17 Correct Which means they're creative, Jeff.

19:20 Okay?

19:22 If you want to see it that way. Another person said, you should all be a group of raccoons and one of you is Jimothy.

19:28 Yeah, I love that.

19:30 Ashton, your bones are weird like this.

19:32 Ashton, I think we all can vote for that.

19:34 I only support it if we actually go around the neighborhood and eat out of people's garbage cans.

19:40 For real. After Jeffrey's love of cat food, I'm not surprised he's on to this one.

19:44 And one last one. I've got a costume idea that's unique that no one is doing. All of you dress as insurance mascots. Flo from Progressive, Mayhem from Allstate, Jake from State Farm, the Aflac Duck, and the Geico Gecko.

19:59 Yeah, as soon as those companies pay us, then we can talk.

20:03 I would love to be the Liberty Bibberty guy who wears normal stuff.

20:06 I want to be the Lemu Emu.

20:07 That would be funny. Oh, and Jeff could be the guy with the glasses.

20:11 I don't know. I don't want to have another weirdo with an insurance fetish telling us how to dress. They're going to be like, come on, Limu, Emu, kiss the gecko while the caveman watches. You know those insurance people. That's how insurance people are.

20:25 Why is that the first thing in your head always?

20:28 It's always like that with the insurance groups.

20:30 No, it just means that that's what you're thinking.

20:31 Who's not thinking that?

20:33 Everyone.

20:34 Everyone's thinking it. Thank you.

20:37 Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

20:41 If you're in an exclusive relationship, and let's say you're on the couch watching TV together, and you hear. So you both look over, and there on your phone screen is two words.

20:56 Hey, stranger.

20:58 Winky face.

20:59 Whoa!

21:00 And it's someone you saved in your phone a while back as Pizza Hut heart emoji.

21:06 Uh-oh.

21:06 Wait a minute. Then you either need to move out or get ready for a 46-hour long conversation about who Pizza Hut really is. Yeah.

21:18 You're not going to the salad bar later?

21:20 I mean, I'm stuffing someone's crust.

21:22 So just fair warning after you hear this next segment, if you're driving to work with your significant other, Lock your phones and open your ears for stories about people who weren't careful enough in a brand new Busted coming up right after this.

21:39 Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

21:40 Sneaky husbands.

21:42 Two timing wives. Bad boyfriends. And even worse, girlfriends.

21:46 They thought they could get away with it.

21:48 But now, they're about to get Busted. Don't you hate it when you find somebody else's underwear in your bed and you think either my partner's cheating or the Tooth Fairy seriously has changed her business model?

22:04 I don't know. It's hard out there. Things are expensive, inflation, I get her.

22:09 Sure. And even though the Tooth Fairy is freaky, I mean, she went to college with Brooke, we all know who's really to blame. And that's why we created this segment, so listeners can share how they caught their dumb exes putting more than just their teeth under somebody else's pillow. We've got a few listeners ready to share their story, starting with Jessica. So Jessica, tell us how you busted your significant other.

22:32 So my boyfriend told me he had to work late at the funeral home. He was taking like this internship there in college.

22:39 Okay. So that part's real, right?

22:42 That part is real.

22:44 Okay.

22:44 All right.

22:45 Starting off a little weird, but go for it.

22:47 So I was trying to be nice.

22:48 I brought him dinner there as a surprise.

22:51 Uh-huh.

22:52 And I walked into.

22:53 The viewing room and I hear.

22:57 These noises coming from one of the open coffins.

23:00 Oh, yikes.

23:01 Yeah.

23:02 What?

23:02 I'm super spooked.

23:04 So I yell out his name to see like if he's nearby.

23:08 Yeah.

23:08 And he pops out of the coffin.

23:12 What?

23:14 And so does another woman.

23:17 Whoa.

23:17 Please tell me she's alive. The woman. Yeah.

23:21 It's valid.

23:21 That's a valid question.

23:23 Only on this segment do we need to ask that question.

23:26 She's dating.

23:27 Exactly. Literally, like, I was so pissed he was cheating, but I.

23:31 Was so thankful that this woman was.

23:33 At least alive.

23:34 Yeah.

23:35 Okay.

23:36 Yeah.

23:37 You know what I'm saying?

23:38 I mean.

23:38 I think we all understand.

23:39 I feel like you were dating Dracula. He's kind of a bad boy.

23:42 That's weird.

23:42 Yeah.

23:43 But I can't imagine what was going through your mind when you saw all that.

23:47 I mean, I laughed. I was upset and crying.

23:49 But, like, he came home and he's, like, trying to convince me that they were just testing out the comfort of the merchandise.

23:58 Come on.

23:59 Oh, yeah. Okay.

24:00 Who doesn't leave a funeral home crying?

24:01 Yeah.

24:03 Wow.

24:04 Exactly.

24:05 What a way to start it off. Let's keep going to Christopher. Tell us how you busted your significant other.

24:11 So my ex-girlfriend was a teacher, right? And I, I'm surprised I stopped into her classroom during lunch.

24:19 It is wild how many of these start with, I surprised my significant other at work.

24:24 Yeah. Every other person in a relationship is like, how come my significant other never surprises me with lunch? This is why. This is so weird.

24:35 And this is probably the reason why I've never surprised anyone else since then.

24:39 Why?

24:40 What happened?

24:42 So I'd been there before, you know, but it had been a while. So when I get there, I noticed she had a different name on the door to her, like, classroom. It said, like, Mrs. Johnson. And she was sitting at her desk and she was kind of flustered that I was there. And I was like, what's up with Mrs. Johnson, right?

25:01 And she said, oh, that's just her teaching name.

25:04 Oh, like a stage name, I see. So the kids can't find your Insta.

25:09 Actually, no.

25:10 That actually is good.

25:12 But then this kid comes in and was like, Mrs. Johnson, oh, is this the guy you married last month?

25:20 Oh.

25:21 Oh.

25:21 Like, is this your new husband? Okay.

25:24 Maybe she was just talking about how she wanted to get married to you.

25:29 And then I remember she had told me about, like, a family thing, and she was out of town, like, a month before.

25:36 Oh.

25:36 Yeah.

25:37 So she was married to a Mr. Johnson.

25:41 She got married while we were dating.

25:43 Whoa.

25:43 Explains the name change.

25:46 And not to you.

25:47 Wow. It was not me.

25:50 Yikes.

25:50 Dang.

25:51 It's like, what did she say to the kid? This is my other husband.

25:54 Yeah.

25:54 This is Mrs.

25:55 Johnson's friend. I don't think there's any way to explain to a child what's going on there.

25:58 I'm going to have to class gossip, though. Yeah, he's got the tea.

26:02 The day of the word is side piece. Okay, kids, let's learn.

26:06 Oh, man, that sucks.

26:07 Yeah, it's one thing if you're, like, going to cheat on someone, but to get married.

26:10 Yeah. That's a whole other level.

26:13 I mean, lucky for you, you were the husband.

26:16 Yeah.

26:17 Seriously.

26:18 For sure.

26:19 Well, we've got to keep going. We have time for one more. Let's talk to Haley here. Tell us how you busted your significant other.

26:24 So my boyfriend joined a bowling league. Or so he said. But it turns out it was literally the dumbest plan to cheat on me that's ever existed.

26:36 I like that.

26:37 You were with the stupid one, huh?

26:40 Why?

26:41 What was going on?

26:42 Well, I told him I was coming to support him one night.

26:46 Weirdly, that exact same night, my glasses went totally missing.

26:51 Like I couldn't find.

26:52 Them in the spot I normally put them and they weren't.

26:54 Around the house.

26:55 But luckily, I had a backup pair.

26:57 Okay.

26:58 So I get to the bowling alley, and I see my boyfriend. At least I thought it was him, but something kind of seemed off.

27:06 And I couldn't figure it out. So when I got closer to him, I realized it was.

27:11 A guy that looked almost identical to my boyfriend.

27:15 What? Yeah.

27:15 Like you just ran into a random dude at the bowling alley that looked like your boyfriend?

27:20 Or his long-lost twin brother. That's a great bowler.

27:23 So I go up to this random guy. And I start, like, asking him questions.

27:28 And he literally tries to convince me he's my boyfriend.

27:32 Wait, what?

27:33 Like, he is him.

27:35 What?

27:36 I'm confused.

27:36 You don't remember that we've been dating for the last however long?

27:40 He's trying to gaslight you into thinking that you're dating him.

27:43 Yes, but he is my boyfriend.

27:45 But you know it's not.

27:46 Right.

27:47 No, it's definitely not my boyfriend.

27:49 Okay.

27:51 And eventually, he admits that my boyfriend's plans was to hire him to be a stand-in at the bowling alley.

27:59 Oh, my God.

28:00 And he stole your glasses so that you would just be out of focus enough that maybe.

28:05 You'd buy it?

28:05 Yep.

28:06 That's exactly what he did.

28:07 There's that big blurry face that I love.

28:11 Yes.

28:13 Wow. Did you change cologne and get three inches taller?

28:16 That is so wild.

28:18 I love you.

28:19 Here's the question. Was this guy an upgrade? Because maybe he just took him.

28:22 Was he the cuter version?

28:24 He was kind of like the model version. I think he found him on some... Oh, that's nice. He's like a high.

28:29 Yeah, but it sucks that he was doing this whole plan to cheat on you.

28:33 He just got hired.

28:34 Yeah.

28:35 An actor's got to do what an actor's got to do in this economy.

28:38 Yeah, that's a good way to end this. You do what you got to do until you get busted. So hit up our text board, 78592, if you have a funny story about how you caught your ex cheating and you could be on the next edition of Busted. Phone tap's coming up right after this. It's time for your prank phone call. It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

28:55 All right.

28:55 And you know what's the least fun word, in my opinion?

28:58 What?

28:59 Policy. If I have to hear, excuse me, sir, it's our policy that you don't take your shoes and pants off in the restaurant.

29:12 Annoying. Am I right?

29:14 So I think I speak for everyone when I say we need new policies that are fun and different. And I know one elementary school vice principal who's supportive of that. And today he's calling a mom to tell her about his brand new policy that's about to make life a whole lot better. Not for her or for her kid, but for the teachers, for sure. In your phone tap right now.

29:37 Brooke and Jeffrey's phone taps on the 20s. Hello?

29:39 Hello?

29:43 Excuse me, who is this?

29:45 Hello?

29:45 Hello? Hello?

29:56 Yes.

29:57 Hi. Sorry. Is this Carolyn's mom?

30:00 Yeah.

30:01 Who is this?

30:02 This is Vice Principal Andrews from elementary. Okay. Sorry about that. Just jamming out.

30:13 What can I help you with? Is something wrong with my daughter?

30:16 Oh, no, no.

30:17 Carolyn's fine. I'm just calling wondering why you're not responding to my emails or why you haven't responded to the invoices that I've sent out.

30:27 You say invoices? I'm confused about this. What are you referring to?

30:32 Okay. You don't know? Well, look, now that I have you on the phone, at least we could just do it right here.

30:37 I have no idea what you're talking about.

30:38 I'm sorry.

30:39 So Carolyn's racked up $ 436. 50 this quarter. So that was due last week. What is this week?

30:51 Total from.

30:51 I mean, $ 430 is.

30:53 A lot, and I haven't been aware of any charges.

30:56 Correction, correction. It is $ 436. 50 that Carolyn has racked up in crosswalk toll fees.

31:07 What do you mean crosswalk? I've never heard of that.

31:10 It's a new policy this year where every time a student uses the school crosswalk, it's $ 1. 50.

31:16 What?

31:19 What?

31:19 Yeah, that's during non-peak hours.

31:22 Peak hours?

31:23 And then surge pricing happens within five minutes of the bell.

31:27 I still don't.

31:28 It looks like Carolyn took advantage of that almost 40% of the time. So that's why hers is a little bit higher than others.

31:35 You're talking about the crosswalk, like walking across the street?

31:38 Exactly. That's right.

31:40 That should be a free service for the children to keep them safe crossing the street. I don't understand why the children are being monitored.

31:48 Just to be clear, the children aren't paying. The parents are.

31:51 Are we paying the crossing guards? Is this paying the school? I don't understand.

31:55 You know what?

31:56 I can answer that for you. So a group of teachers and administrators are trying to raise enough money in order to get Doja Cat to come perform at the school.

32:04 Doja Cat?

32:06 It's pretty exciting.

32:07 You know this is a voluntary school, right? Like, this is not.

32:10 I know that it's a private concert for the teachers and the faculty. It's not for the kids.

32:15 For the teachers.

32:15 The good news is, if we don't raise the half a million dollars... A half a million? That's what her fee is. What? If we don't reach that mark, we'll allocate the funds for Hennessy in the teacher's lounge.

32:28 No.

32:28 Which you probably understand is desperately needed.

32:31 Why would there be Hennessy in the teacher's... I don't... This doesn't make any sense.

32:35 I'm sorry.

32:35 Are you a teacher?

32:37 No, I am not a teacher.

32:38 Okay, then you have no authority to speak on what teachers do and don't do. Because right now, I can tell you 100%, we need Hennessy.

32:46 You don't need Hennessy, especially at school. This is actually absurd.

32:50 The way that you're saying it makes it sound like we're doing something devious.

32:54 It sounds like something devious. It does. You are trying to drink at school.

33:00 To be clear, the drinking would happen before school and after only, not during.

33:04 Oh, that doesn't make a difference.

33:07 You're trying to spin this into a bad thing like the PTA tried to do.

33:10 Yeah, I think it is a bad thing. I think the PTA should be involved.

33:15 Okay.

33:15 Are you talking about the crosswalk fees or are you talking about the alcohol in the teacher's lounge?

33:21 I am referring to all of it because none of it feels safe and none of it feels like... A private concert with Doja Cat? Like, that shouldn't even be a thought.

33:29 Yeah, well, okay. Initially, we had SZA on the list.

33:32 Oh, my God.

33:33 Okay.

33:34 She got a lot more expensive after her collab with Kendrick.

33:37 Oh, okay.

33:38 You can see our predicament.

33:40 I don't.

33:40 I don't see your predicament.

33:42 Well, I would hate to send you to collections court over this. That would break my heart.

33:45 Collections court?

33:46 That but I'm also happy to fight any charge y'all are trying to bring because none of this makes sense and none of this is appropriate.

33:53 Yeah I recently had to send another mom there you might know her her name's Laura what yeah.

33:59 You sent Laura that is my best friend you sent my friend Laura.

34:03 To collection and I have not heard anything about this.

34:06 Right well she probably didn't want to tell you because it's all part of this prank phone call we're doing and she didn't want to tip you off.

34:13 Wait, excuse me?

34:14 Yeah, because I actually don't work for the school. I host a radio show, and my name is Jeff from Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning, and we're doing a phone tap on you.

34:23 Oh, my God.

34:23 What?

34:25 It's a joke.

34:26 This is a freaking joke.

34:28 Are you serious? Yeah.

34:31 Laura's the one who set you up for it.

34:34 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I'm just glad I was not in public when this happened.

34:40 Okay.

34:41 Yeah, because if you were, we would have charged you a fee.

34:44 Oh, God.

34:46 Brooke and Jeffrey's phone taps on the 20s.

34:49 Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

34:51 What is it about an office that just turns people on?

34:57 What?

34:57 No idea, Jeff.

34:59 I mean.

35:00 Is it the sensual glow of the fluorescent lights?

35:04 Yeah.

35:05 The breathy small talk over by the water cooler?

35:08 That must be it.

35:09 Or the rhythmic sound of a 17-year-old Xerox machine churning out warm sheets of copy paper?

35:18 Oh, my God.

35:19 Oh, my God.

35:19 So warm.

35:19 Thanks for not playing the sound effect for us. It would have gotten real hot.

35:22 Yeah.

35:22 But look, if you find yourself crushing on a co-worker in the office, you can't be so obvious about it.

35:29 Oh.

35:30 That's why one of our listeners came up with a sneaky plan that involved a microwave and a wilted bowl of salad.

35:38 Ew.

35:39 Gross.

35:40 It actually worked. You're going to hear it in your brand new Second Date Update next.

35:45 Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

35:47 Second Date Update.

35:49 We do a lot of dating stuff on this show.

35:51 Yeah.

35:51 A lot of studies about dating and building attraction. And I know one says don't shower for a month. to let your natural pheromones give off an intoxicating must. It's one way to try and lure someone in. We've also heard... Fear can actually help heighten romantic attraction between two people.

36:14 Oh, yeah.

36:14 Like trauma bonding.

36:16 Yeah.

36:17 I was thinking more watching a scary movie together.

36:21 I was like, get in a car crash together.

36:23 Either one could bring you together.

36:26 We should get robbed together.

36:27 And while all of those ideas sound super fun, it's not nearly as effective as what most dating experts agree is just proximity.

36:37 What do you mean?

36:37 Being close to somebody physically, staying in their hemisphere, being in their surroundings, get noticed, is one of the easiest ways to build attraction.

36:46 I feel like you're just saying that it's making me claustrophobic, but okay.

36:49 Why did you scoot your chair closer to me when I said it, though? I did it.

36:52 That was a little weird. Yeah.

36:53 That'd be so funny.

36:56 Proximity is what happened for our listener, Eric, and how he met a woman recently. So, Eric, welcome to the show. Hey, guys. How's it going?

37:03 Hey, Eric.

37:04 Did you sit in her lap at the bar? Is that how you met?

37:07 Not quite.

37:08 No.

37:09 No?

37:09 How did you get proximity with this lady?

37:12 So we work together in the same office. We're not seated in the same cubicle. She's down a ways, but I can see her.

37:23 Okay.

37:23 So I would see when she gets up to go to the break room. It would be my cue for when I go to the break room too, right?

37:33 It's like the pencil sharpener in the elementary school all over again.

37:37 Oh, yeah.

37:38 Anytime you had a new shirt, immediately pencils, all of them getting sharpened.

37:42 Hold on a second. For all the kids listening, you used to have to have wooden pencils in school that you would have to physically sharpen like a grinder.

37:49 Yeah, and if your crush went up to the sharpener, you'd go too.

37:51 Yes, okay. Now that the history lesson is over, back to the dating thing. Do you know, what's this woman's name?

37:58 Her name is Regina. Regina.

37:59 Okay.

38:00 And I didn't have a pencil to sharpen, but I had to have some reason to be in the break room at the same time as her.

38:07 God, you're drinking so much coffee. Am I right?

38:10 I had to microwave. I had to microwave some food, right? Oh, there you go. And so I would use the time to talk to her.

38:16 Okay.

38:17 But one time she caught me because the only thing I had was my salad. So I just put the whole thing in the microwave.

38:25 Oh, okay. Okay.

38:28 Did she call you out for it?

38:29 She did. And I had to, I had to admit it. And you know, she said, well, you could just ask me out instead. I was feeling good. I said, all right, how about we go out on a real date 24 hours from now here in the break room.

38:49 What?

38:50 In the break room?

38:51 Dude, you just dropped the ball so hard.

38:55 I've got a second salad I could heat up for you if you want some.

38:58 What are you talking about?

39:00 I figured we could prep. I could bring flowers and food and we'd just have a date in the break room. Look, I thought it was a unique idea. I thought she would be into it.

39:11 It is unique.

39:12 Guess what? HR wouldn't be into it.

39:15 What did she think of the date inside of the office?

39:19 Well, she agreed at first, but then we were emailing and she was like, I don't know if this is such a good idea. You know, other people are going to be in the break room.

39:28 Yeah.

39:29 What is done?

39:29 Yeah. Watching it happen.

39:32 Yeah. Yeah.

39:32 So instead we decided to go out to lunch. It's a really good place that I like. It's this Greek Vietnamese fusion place.

39:43 That's an interesting comment.

39:45 It's a unique place.

39:47 She got the tzatziki bun bowl and I got I got banh mi souvlaki with the grilled pork.

39:56 I was going to say, at least it's grilled. Like, that's kind of nice.

39:59 I'm not against that second one.

40:01 I can't even picture what it looks like, though. It just sounds really wet.

40:03 Are you dipping in pho or are you dipping in tzatziki?

40:05 Okay, we are concentrating on the wrong thing. It doesn't matter what he was eating.

40:10 But, you know, I mean, we got along. We got to know each other better, like, outside of work.

40:14 Okay, was there, like, a highlight?

40:16 There was a moment. I don't know if I would consider it a highlight. Uh-oh. It was a little embarrassing.

40:22 Okay.

40:22 So we're eating, right?

40:24 Yeah.

40:25 And I noticed that her bra strap was showing, like it had kind of fallen down, you know?

40:31 Off her shoulder?

40:33 Okay.

40:33 Her hands were all covered in tzatziki sauce.

40:37 Oh, no, no, no.

40:38 So I just reached over and just kind of pushed it back up for her over her shoulder.

40:43 That makes me so uncomfortable.

40:44 I was just, I was, I was trying to be helpful and not make a big deal out of it.

40:48 And I could see it as like your opportunity to kind of like reach out and touch her a little.

40:57 Bit. What was her reaction when you put her bra back on for her? Did she appreciate that?

41:03 Well, she kind of stopped eating and she looked at me funny and she was like, thanks, but We kind of brushed off past that, and after lunch, we drove back to the parking garage, and there was a moment where I thought maybe something was going to happen, right?

41:22 Oh.

41:24 Lunch date in the parking lot?

41:28 I'm hoping you're reading this right.

41:29 He just touched her bra, bro, obviously. Okay.

41:32 Well, the problem was our breath was not great.

41:38 A lot of garlic breath.

41:40 They had mints, but they were like these fish mints. Yeah, I guess that's a thing. So we did not kiss.

41:49 Probably good.

41:50 Sure.

41:50 But you have to go back to the office after all of this.

41:53 Like, what is the vibe when.

41:55 You guys both go back to your cubicles?

41:57 Well, now that she knows my trick of like going into the break room with her, I can't do that, obviously.

42:05 You can't.

42:06 Oh, yeah.

42:06 So I really don't know, you guys. I really don't know. And I need help.

42:12 It sounds like you've definitely lost the romantic momentum that you had gained early on.

42:16 Yeah, I think so.

42:16 Can we pinpoint why?

42:18 Yeah.

42:19 Hopefully it's not everything.

42:21 It couldn't be the bras touching.

42:23 The choice of restaurant. The attempt at a break room date.

42:26 Just the lunch date to begin with.

42:28 There's a lot of layers.

42:29 There's got to be something else. Something else that's holding her back from seeing you one more time. We'll give her a call when we come back and do your second date update right after this. Hold on.

42:41 Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

42:43 Second date update.

42:46 It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning. And if you're just joining us, really interesting in-person date we just heard about. Our listener, Eric, asked out a woman from his workplace.

42:56 Always risky.

42:57 Her name's Regina. And thankfully, they did not end up doing their first idea, which was a candlelight lunch in their office break room.

43:07 Okay, I don't know if it was their idea. I think it was definitely his.

43:11 It was brought up and agreed upon, but they thought more of it and scrapped it for a Greek-Vietnamese fusion place.

43:19 Which we're all dying to try now.

43:20 With fish mints to complement it at the end of the meal. So they got to know each other. And maybe the only non-highlight, according to Eric, was he adjusted her bra for her during lunch.

43:33 Not the cups, you guys, just the strap.

43:35 The strap.

43:35 Thank you for clarifying. Because her fingers were covered in tzatziki sauce, and she couldn't do it herself.

43:42 But she didn't ask him.

43:43 He just did it.

43:44 Reached over the table.

43:45 Not even making this up. And now he's wondering... he's not getting a chance for another date.

43:51 I will say, to your credit, she was very into the idea of you asking her out, so it's interesting to me that she wouldn't give you another shot. You know, like, everybody can have a date, one date, go bad, especially a lunch date.

44:03 Oh, Yeah.

44:04 Like I said, it went well. There were a couple of hiccups, but I think overall it was it was a good date.

44:10 Interesting hearing that recap.

44:14 Well, we're trying to move forward from this. We'll move on from the fishmints and the Vietnamese style. And we're going to get you hopefully another date with Regina here. I'm going to dial her number right now. Let's see if she picks up. Thank you.

44:26 All right, man.

44:26 Here we go.

44:36 Hello?

44:36 Hey, is this Regina?

44:39 Yeah, speaking.

44:40 Who's this?

44:41 Hey, Regina. This is Jeff from a radio show called Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning. Hey, Regina. Yes, the Jeff. You're speaking to him.

44:49 I knew that was going to be your follow-up question. Is it the Jeff?

44:52 Okay.

44:54 She's not laughing, Jeff.

44:55 Okay, that's fine. So I don't know if you've heard of our show, but we do kind of a popular segment here. It's called a second date update.

45:03 Okay.

45:03 Okay.

45:04 Okay.

45:05 I'm going to move faster based on your tone here. So basically, we're trying to help out a listener of ours that you went out with one time, a really nice guy. His name was Eric.

45:14 You probably know him from work.

45:16 Maybe.

45:16 Yeah.

45:17 So wait, he called you guys?

45:19 Yeah, because we heard you two went out and had.

45:22 A lunch date.

45:23 A lunch date.

45:24 Yep.

45:24 Very fun, interesting time, according to Eric. And the vibes that he's getting now afterwards seem to be much... colder than before.

45:35 Is he reading that right yes um okay yes he is.

45:42 So he thought the day went pretty well he did think it went well but he also acknowledges maybe there were some strange moments some low points that he's willing to fess up to okay.

45:53 With your bra strap do you just want to say i mean.

45:55 I don't know how much i can say it makes.

45:57 Us uncomfortable regina do you know what we're talking about the bra strap moment was that a moment for you.

46:02 Yeah and it was not a moment for me but yes i know what you were talking about he.

46:07 Explained it to me so i'm like okay cool like i understand like i personally would never have done that but i understand.

46:14 Right all right so that that is not the reason things have gotten cold no okay.

46:20 That's good so well we're trying to figure out what the other reason might be because eric is kind of clueless.

46:28 Okay, so, I mean, obviously he told you about our date.

46:31 Did he tell you, like, everything?

46:34 Well, that was the big highlight he mentioned was the bra strap incident.

46:38 Hmm, okay. So, well, I will tell you guys.

46:41 As we were driving back from the restaurant, he's like, oh, we have some time to kill. Like, before we have to go back to work, let's, you know, like, make up money from what I spent on lunch.

46:52 And I'm just like... What?

46:54 What?

46:54 Make up money?

46:55 What does that mean?

46:56 Yeah.

46:56 Yeah.

46:57 So before I could even ask him, he whipped out his phone and signed into Uber and was like, oh, this is perfect. This is right here. We can just do this quick drive.

47:06 Wait, wait, wait. He's calling an Uber?

47:09 No, no.

47:09 He is going to be the Uber.

47:12 Oh.

47:12 Yeah, he's going to be the Uber driver.

47:14 With you in the car with him?

47:17 Yeah, so we did pick up this older guy. We brought him to the mall. And so I'm like, this is so weird.

47:22 Like, this is so awkward. But I'm like, you know, like, I do like him.

47:26 So like, let me talk to him. So I was trying to talk and he looks at me and goes, he requested no talking.

47:32 Oh.

47:33 Passenger.

47:35 Oh, my God.

47:36 Somebody shushed you in the Uber?

47:39 He shushed me, like, with his finger to his lips and went.

47:43 Oh, God. Okay. That makes things a little bit more clear for us. Well, I don't know.

47:48 I mean, is that really a reason not to go out with somebody again?

47:51 You already met at work.

47:53 What's the difference between you're at work together and now you're just at a different job together, you know?

47:58 No, because one, I signed up for my other job.

48:00 I never signed up to be a co-Uber driver person.

48:04 And also, he shushed me like a child.

48:06 Okay, that was a problem.

48:07 Okay.

48:08 Well, I'm not going to shush you right now, Regina, but I am going to tell you to be quiet for a second while we bring Eric on the other phone line because he's been listening to this call the entire time.

48:18 Are you kidding me?

48:20 No, I'm not. Eric?

48:23 Hey, Regina.

48:26 Hi, Eric.

48:27 You better not be in an Uber right now, dude.

48:29 Eric.

48:30 No, I'm not working right now.

48:32 Yeah, you missed a pretty important detail from the drive from the restaurant back to work.

48:38 But to me, it just made sense. I mean, I checked on the app. It was literally on the way. So it was like, why wouldn't we make a little bit of extra money on the way back?

48:49 Dude, I'm with him. That sounds great to me.

48:52 Brooke, this is not your talking position.

48:55 But like Regina, can't you see?

48:57 It occurs to me now. That I don't think I asked you first.

49:04 Would it have helped if he had asked you permission to do an Uber ride?

49:10 I would have said, let me get out because I don't want to be like, I could have because no, because also my thing is, it just seemed like he was just focused on him and what he wanted.

49:18 And you were like, well, I need this. I'm going to do this.

49:21 And you're going to be my hostage for however long.

49:24 I think you're missing the point, Regina. You heard Eric. He just fell on his sword. He apologized. He wishes he would have asked you first. He knows that's a mistake.

49:32 Locking the doors was a bad idea.

49:35 You guys know the worst, the worst part. He only gave me a $ 3 tip.

49:40 Oh, I know.

49:42 You complained about it the whole way back to the office.

49:45 That's going to pay for maybe pita bread. Maybe.

49:49 So are you saying maybe the drive wasn't worth it?

49:53 I mean, I did not mean to upset her. And now the shushing... definitely also looks bad, but I'm working and the guy requested silence and I had to, like, that was just the quickest way I could convey that to her.

50:13 Isn't the silence, like, when you request it, it's just you don't want to be talked to?

50:16 Yeah.

50:17 Like, because my Uber drivers are always on the phone. Always.

50:20 Yeah.

50:21 And I'm like, yeah, do you?

50:22 I don't know. This guy did not seem like he wanted us chatting about our new budding relationship while he was going to the mall.

50:31 Oh.

50:32 Do you still feel like it's budding? Because if you do, I'm willing to offer to send you two on another date.

50:37 Oh.

50:37 And we would pay for it, Regina.

50:39 I mean.

50:41 I'm hesitant, to be honest, because, yeah, like, we had our cute little moment in the break room and stuff like that. But at the end of the day, he just wasn't as considerate as I thought he would.

50:53 And kind of what I'm looking for.

50:54 I think I'm very considerate. What about when I fixed your bra strap?

51:00 Yeah. What a gentleman.

51:02 Yeah. I mean, yes, but also you could have just let it ride.

51:07 Yeah.

51:09 But to answer y'all's question, if you were serious about paying, I will give him another shot because I don't want to do another Uber trip.

51:18 Okay. All right.

51:20 So a free lunch. Or are we doing dinner? Are we doing dinner?

51:23 I do like breakfast.

51:26 No dinner. We'll find a non-fusion dinner restaurant to send you to.

51:31 Hey, now that was not the problem.

51:34 But congratulations, Eric. You got yourself another date with your co-worker.

51:38 Who would have seen this coming?

51:39 Thank you guys so much.

51:42 Don't screw this up. It's already going to be awkward enough in your workplace.

51:46 Yeah, but think of how much we can laugh about this in a couple of years.

51:50 Hold up.

51:55 I agreed to a second date.

51:56 I did not agree to my future with you, Celestia.

52:01 And go from there.

52:02 Talk to her years back in your pocket.

52:03 I don't know.

52:04 I feel like those are famous last words.

52:06 One step at a time.

52:08 All right.

52:08 I just cannot wait to send them on their romantic dinner in the break room.

52:12 After hours in the office.

52:14 It's going to be hot.

52:15 Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

52:19 Normally we wait a few weeks or months for update updates, but I just got an email from Eric.

52:25 What?

52:25 We did?

52:26 He's very excited about his next hangout and just found a new Scandinavian curry joint.

52:32 Get out of here.

52:32 You are making that up. The craziest fusion.

52:35 They serve the best tandoori loot fist kebabs. That sounds so gross. He is set. I don't know where they're going to go yet, but.

52:44 I don't know.

52:45 Do you guys think that they have what it takes to actually be a legit couple?

52:49 She does.

52:50 It was her and someone else.

52:55 I like that he's a hustler. He's doing what he can.

52:58 I mean, she's got to know what about he gets paid since he works in the same office as her.

53:05 I mean, the good part is he does seem like he's actually trying to be thoughtful and considerate in some of the things that he does. He's failing spectacularly.

53:13 You know what? But that's where the bar is, Jeff.

53:14 Yeah. Just try to put a little effort in.

53:17 Yeah.

53:18 So we'll see what happens with them and keep you updated. But if you need a little help in your love life, email the show. We'll call that person who's not calling you back. Go find all of our second day podcasts. They're up online wherever you get yours at Brooke and Jeffrey.

53:30 Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.

53:34 We're less than two weeks from Halloween. Good morning. It is the Brooke and Jeffrey experience. And I know at the beginning of October, we did a couple segments talking about what we were going to wear this year. Because we always do a big group costume. If you're a new listener, you may not have known that. But it's kind of a tradition on this show. that we've done for at least five or six years now. We've done Scooby-Doo, Harry Potter, Disney villains.

54:00 Mario.

54:01 Mario. Yeah, it was fun. And elements of the periodic table where I was gold and Brooke was arsenic.

54:08 I love that costume.

54:09 Just really stuck to our personalities.

54:11 Jose was definitely helium.

54:13 Back to this year, we've talked about what we should be a little bit, and then we went silent. And the silence is because we have landed on the idea. We've got our group category selected, and no one on the show knows who anybody else is going to be until we show up the day of that work day.

54:32 Which is kind of what we always do.

54:34 We tell everyone this is the theme, and this is what you are going to be, but we don't ever know.

54:38 What anybody else is.

54:39 Only the producer knows everybody's costume, but I will say there could be just a tiny issue. There is a chance that I... have not bought my costume yet.

54:50 Bro, it's like a week away, Jeff.

54:51 Why is this, like, done? You are so last minute on everything.

54:56 I'm sorry.

54:57 You're the guy in the group costume that just mails it in.

55:01 The costumes, they're just not up to my standards when I'm looking online. I have very high standards. I know you guys don't because I see them every year.

55:09 You dressed as a pinata onesie one year.

55:12 That was a very cool pinata.

55:13 Yeah.

55:14 You know you wanted the candy inside. But I actually care. And that's why I refuse to hit buy until I think it's good enough for this show.

55:25 Go with me to Michael's craft store and DIY it. Like the good costumes are.

55:30 My life's a nightmare enough as it is.

55:32 Please.

55:33 But you know what? If things get rough in the end, I'll just have Ashton and his dad make me a costume.

55:38 It would be iconic.

55:40 It's a week away, basically, Jeff.

55:42 It's not like a just... Yeah, Ashton, it's a week away. Stop procrastinating. I am so sorry, Jeffrey. Yeah, get on it. But I guess we'll see what happens for our big Halloween show the Friday from next. I have a feeling it won't be very smooth.

55:57 I'm stoked about mine.

56:00 I have mine.

56:01 Laser Stories is coming up right after this. It's the radio segment that just got its hands on the Russian version of ChatGPT. It's called ChatKGB.

56:16 Uh-oh.

56:17 Where it only gives answers approved by the Russian government.

56:21 Oh, okay.

56:22 If it's snowing, no, it's sunny and beautiful. Stock market advice, Russian economy is booming. Don't look at the Internet. Why did your wife leave you? She was Russian spy.

56:35 Oh.

56:36 American spy, I mean. Download chat KGB now with 100% less privacy thanks to laser stories. The segment where we read weird news stories around the globe just like everyone else does except we've got a laser. Those other chat bovskas just don't.

56:51 And we don't need a data center for our laser.

56:53 Nuh-uh. Let's go to your first laser story out of Pennsylvania. An elderly woman named Carolyn Marvin... had a bizarre confrontation with someone last Wednesday, and that someone was none other than an Uber Eats delivery robot. A robot?

57:11 Those things are so, like, they make them kind of cute. Because they have their own name.

57:15 I have a question. Is somebody controlling it, or do they honestly are doing it all on GPS?

57:19 They're all on GPS.

57:20 Really?

57:21 They have free will. They operate under their own thing. They have all the rights. Don't ask questions.

57:28 I saw somebody say that they're controlled.

57:30 According to the surveillance video on the robot, Carolyn repeatedly blocked its path, and then when police officers showed up and told her to move, she refused their commands as well. I think nobody got time for this.

57:43 The delivery robot calls the cops on you?

57:46 I guess so.

57:46 That's kind of interesting.

57:48 After being arrested and charged with disorderly conduct, Carolyn later said she was protesting the use of delivery bots because she believes they're replacing human workers. Calm down. They are, and that's true. She added that she always does this and believes her actions are protected free speech. Then did an interview with the local news and encouraged others to do the same because robots like these are taking over the world.

58:16 Oh, yeah.

58:17 I mean, you do kind of want to tip them over. Just to say that you won. They're annoying.

58:21 Yeah.

58:21 You tip them over, then you tip them.

58:23 They're still delivering. They're working hard. One of the comments online said, imagine someone in jail asking you what you're in for, and your answer was, I wouldn't get out of the way of a Grubhub robot.

58:35 Didn't step to the left.

58:36 Let's go to your next laser story out of Kelowna, Canada. A 33-year-old man named Brady Rogers just won a city council election. After an unconventional campaign where he openly admitted he had no clue what he was doing. Oh, yeah!

58:54 Oh, they're trying to admit it now.

58:56 All right, so we're just going to be out front, huh?

58:58 His signs included slogans like, Brady Rogers for city council, just trying to pay my rent. Brady Rogers. How hard could it be?

59:08 I like that one.

59:10 And finally, Brady Rogers. I barely want to do this. So I'll show you guys some pictures of the actual signs. I wasn't lying with those slogans. But this sarcastic approach did get Brady some attention.

59:26 He's wearing a shirt in this picture on the signs that says dad life.

59:30 Very uninteresting.

59:31 I like him even more.

59:32 Makes him more relatable. So he went viral, and the voters decided he deserved a shot.

59:37 What?

59:37 And in interviews, he claims he's not a total stooge. He admitted he's never been a politician, but believes he has life experience that could be helpful because he previously worked as a robotic automation engineer before starting a local business that turns plastic waste into new products.

59:54 Wow.

59:55 That's cool.

59:56 Wow, what a good dude.

59:57 That's cool. Yeah, politician, for sure.

59:59 So, you know, I barely want to do this.

1:00:01 So, after winning a spot on the council this past weekend, he thanked the voters and added that despite his humorous campaign... He takes his new responsibilities very seriously if he shows up to work the first day.

1:00:14 Yeah.

1:00:15 He already has five days of golf scheduled.

1:00:17 Fun.

1:00:18 That's true politics.

1:00:19 Yeah. Absolutely.

1:00:21 He's fitting right in.

1:00:22 That'd be funny because most politicians flip completely when they get in.

1:00:25 That'd be super productive all of a sudden.

1:00:26 That'd be amazing. Let's go to your next laser story out of Texas.

1:00:30 Yeehaw.

1:00:31 A wedding venue called Posey Meadows is catching heat online. A while back, a couple shelled out around $ 16, 000 for a wedding that was supposed to happen the next month.

1:00:41 Yeah.

1:00:41 But sadly, the 25-year-old groom passed away back in April, seven months before the wedding. And since then, the family's been trying to get a refund, but Posey Meadows refuses to do that.

1:00:55 Aww.

1:00:56 Because their contract contains no clause for death.

1:01:00 What?

1:01:00 That is just heartless and awful, and I hope no one uses this company.

1:01:05 Well, they told the family if there's no wedding, they could throw another kind of party on that date.

1:01:10 The man just died.

1:01:11 Yeah.

1:01:12 Or they could get credit to have a future wedding there. Oh, you suck.

1:01:17 None of these are good options.

1:01:18 Naturally, the family finds those options frustrating.

1:01:21 Yes.

1:01:22 That is a nice way to say it.

1:01:24 Offensive.

1:01:24 When you're mourning a death, you're probably not looking to party at the place where the wedding was supposed to happen or thinking about a future marriage with a replacement groom.

1:01:33 I agree.

1:01:33 All of it, Jeff. Good point.

1:01:35 And even worse, the family had to sue. And Posey Meadows is now countersuing them. But the venue may have already lost in the court of public opinion because their Google listing and Facebook page are getting inundated with tons of negative reviews.

1:01:50 How can people be so heartless?

1:01:52 Yeah, seriously.

1:01:54 Let's go to your final.

1:01:55 I also just heard there's some openings at Posey Meadows.

1:01:58 Let's go to your final laser story out of Button Mashers Anonymous. Sure, the release of Grand Theft Auto 6 is going to be a big deal.

1:02:08 Oh my gosh.

1:02:08 But will it actually affect the economy?

1:02:11 I think it will.

1:02:13 One guy, not named Jose, also thinks so.

1:02:16 He's a smart guy.

1:02:17 Oh, I see.

1:02:18 The game hits stores on November 19th, which is a Thursday. And while some people might wait till the weekend to dive into it, you know others are going to be blowing off two days of work once it's in their hands.

1:02:28 I'm in love, I'm in love, and I don't care who knows it. Sorry, boss, I have strippers to go pick up.

1:02:35 I see, that makes sense.

1:02:36 In the game, in the game.

1:02:36 Right, right, right, cars to steal.

1:02:38 Yeah, thank you, people to beat up.

1:02:40 An economics professor estimates that 1.5 million people in the U.S. will play hooky at least on Thursday and definitely Friday, which will cost businesses $ 1 billion in lost productivity.

1:02:56 Not to mention all.

1:02:57 The high schoolers that are going to be sick.

1:03:02 And since most of them will be in the 18 to 30 age range, the tech industry is supposed to be disproportionately impacted.

1:03:10 They already have millions of pre-orders on this game. Like, it's already a big sell.

1:03:14 Our work computers are going to crash, and there's not going to be anybody on the other side to fix.

1:03:18 Them, for sure.

1:03:19 Well, as for this guy, he's holding out for the real GTA. Oh.

1:03:23 What?

1:03:24 Grand Theft Aquarium.

1:03:27 Oh.

1:03:27 And I would love to see the cops try to stop him from getting his job done.

1:03:32 I want to play that game.

1:03:33 That sound means Laser Stories has come to an end for the day. We'll do it again same time on Friday. Legend says there's a woman who lives up in them there mountains. She comes down once a morning to feast on the blood and fear of the innocent in a ceremonial trivia game on the radio. Sheriff calls her the Beast of the East, and most of the time, no one can stop her.

1:04:07 Yeah.

1:04:08 Including John, today's player, who was torn to smithereens last time he went face to face with the trivia beast. John, welcome back to your demise. How are you today, son?

1:04:23 I'm doing well, thank you very much.

1:04:24 John, I don't know what's going on in the studio, but I want to buy a truck out of nowhere. What?

1:04:29 I just came down from a mountain on horse, okay?

1:04:31 Because they're built Ford tough.

1:04:33 See, that's why.

1:04:34 That's why.

1:04:35 The horses or the trucks?

1:04:37 Whatever it is.

1:04:38 Okay, there it is.

1:04:39 They're four-wheel drive. Now, we'll see what John can do today. John, I'm tipping my hat. taking my shot of tonsil hockey for you.

1:04:46 What?

1:04:47 You want a tonsil hockey with me, John? Oh, tonsil paint.

1:04:50 Yeah, that is not the hockey part.

1:04:51 Tonsil, you want a hockey or paint.

1:04:52 With me, John?

1:04:53 I mean.

1:04:54 Oh, jeez, paint.

1:04:57 Yes, shoes paint. That's right. Now let's send the demon beast out the studio so we can get to the game.

1:05:02 Demon beast.

1:05:03 Go on, get out of here, you demon. John, you know how it works. You got 30 seconds to answer as many questions as possible. If you don't know and you can say pass, but you have to beat her outright if you want to win. Are you ready?

1:05:15 Let's go.

1:05:16 You got this. Your time starts now. Today is Back to the Future Day. What's the name of Michael J. Fox's character in the franchise?

1:05:24 Marty McFly.

1:05:24 In which country does the famous annual running of the Bulls take place?

1:05:28 Spain.

1:05:30 What famous rapper's real name is Calvin Broadus Jr.? Snoop Dogg. If a train is about to move forward, how many times is the conductor required to blow the whistle?

1:05:40 Twice.

1:05:41 Bowser's favorite kidnapping target is which princess from the Super Mario franchise?

1:05:46 Peach.

1:05:47 Vermillion is a shade of what color?

1:05:50 Green.

1:05:51 All right, John. Well done there.

1:05:53 Yeah, that was amazing.

1:05:54 That was an excellent performance. So let's change the topic to Halloween because for John, he's got three kids. Two of them are 18-year-old twins. And like one of the callers we had before, they're having their birthday party on Halloween.

1:06:11 Dude, Halloween is going to be so lit this year.

1:06:14 Wait, are you invited to the birthday party or are you not invited to the 18-year-old birthday party?

1:06:19 Well, I better be because I'm going to be the one freaking funding it.

1:06:22 Oh, yeah.

1:06:23 Okay.

1:06:23 You can chaperone a little bit.

1:06:25 What's in store for an 18-year-old Halloween birthday?

1:06:31 Well, we just kind of made some invitations and let them invite their friends. We're going to provide food and some drinks, but they're going to have like a door charge. So anything that they make, they just get to keep.

1:06:41 Oh.

1:06:42 Making money off their buddies.

1:06:44 It's for their birthdays.

1:06:46 That's kind of smart. Okay.

1:06:48 Dude, they need to go out and buy lottery tickets. That's what I did when I was 18.

1:06:51 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:06:52 So fun.

1:06:53 I'm sure my son would enjoy that. He's really into money right now.

1:06:56 There she goes. The demon beast is at it once again, trying to get young kids gambling.

1:07:01 Wow.

1:07:02 Well, they got to know how to play Texas Hold'em at a young age, right?

1:07:05 That is true, actually. So now it is Brooke's turn. Brooke, are you ready?

1:07:08 Yeehaw.

1:07:09 Your time starts now. Today is Back to the Future Day. What's the name of Michael J. Fox's character in the franchise? Morty. In which country does the famous annual Running of the Bulls take place? What famous rapper's real name is Calvin Broadus Jr.

1:07:27 Calvin Harris. Oh, no, Snoop Dogg.

1:07:29 If a train is about to move forward, how many times is the conductor required to blow the whistle?

1:07:34 Three times.

1:07:35 Bowser's favorite kidnapping target is which princess from the Super Mario franchise? Peach. Man, that's all the time we got for this round. We got to go over to the scoreboard to see how you both did with our own Jose.

1:07:48 Just think of me as a brown Martha Stewart.

1:07:51 Balaños.

1:07:52 John, you got five correct.

1:07:55 Only one wrong.

1:07:57 I think Back to the Future may have done me in.

1:07:59 It was a good game. Brooke?

1:08:00 Yes?

1:08:02 Wow, John.

1:08:05 Congratulations.

1:08:08 You took down the beast of the east.

1:08:11 Played the beat.

1:08:12 I thought I was on the mountains.

1:08:13 It was an eastern facing mountain.

1:08:16 Oh, okay.

1:08:16 The sun's in our eyes.

1:08:17 Wow.

1:08:18 Anyway, let's go over the answers for everybody. It's back to the future day because this is the date in time that he travels back to go visit with his parents. The name of Michael J. Fox's character is Marty McFly.

1:08:30 Oh.

1:08:31 The country that the famous annual Running of the Bulls takes place in is Spain. Since 1591, every year they've done it. Famous rapper's real name, Calvin Broadus Jr., that would be Snoop Dogg.

1:08:43 Good catch.

1:08:44 If a train's about to move forward, the conductor has to blow the whistle twice. And Bowser's favorite kidnapping target is Princess Peach. You didn't get to this one, Brooke. Vermilion is a shade of what color? Green.

1:08:57 Red.

1:08:58 It is a shade of red. So, John, congrats. Not only did you slay the beast, you beat Brooke, you get $ 100, but also just for playing, you win two tickets to see Bryson Tiller perform at Climate Pledge Arena on Sunday, November 1st.

1:09:13 Sweet.

1:09:14 Thank you very much.

1:09:15 Okay, you're so chill.

1:09:16 Such a kind heart.

1:09:17 Don't really like that about you. Rubbing it in that way.

1:09:21 Well, you beat me last time pretty good, so.

1:09:23 Ah, there we go. Revenge is sweet.

1:09:25 That made me feel happier, yeah.

1:09:27 You enjoy it, John. Come back and play again soon. We're going to do Winbrook's Box same time tomorrow.