EP 264: Responding to the Judgement and Advice from Others

Parenting kids with big, baffling behaviors is hard enough. THEN someone has opinions about it. This episode breaks down why people say the things they say, what's actually happening in you when judgment lands, and how to respond- or not respond- in a way that protects your own regulation.
In this episode:
• Why unsolicited advice and criticism are almost always a projection from the other person's protection brain
• How to recognize when explaining yourself won't actually help
• Practical ways to respond to judgment
Scripts
• "Thank you. I'm comfortable with our parenting decisions."
• "I hear you. I need to tend to my child right now."
Neutral / Redirect
• "We've got it covered, thanks."
• "We have a lot of support around this."
• "I have people I go to for that."
• "That's not something I'm looking for input on."
• "We're working with someone on it."
Warmer with a Clear Boundary
• "I appreciate that you care. We're good."
• "Thanks for thinking of us — we've got support."
Confident / Firmer
• "I'm not looking for advice, but thank you."
• "That's not actually something I'm open to feedback on."
• "We're pretty settled on how we're handling it."
• "I'm not going to take that in, but I hear you."
For the chronic offender
• "We've talked about this- we're not changing course."
• "I've let you know this isn't something I want input on."
The subject-change version
• "Mmm. Anyway…" (and move on)
• "Noted." (full stop)
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/judgement (robyngobbel.com/judgement)
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