Dating Icks: Are We Too Picky? ft. Kenzie Anne

0:00 Welcome to Coffee and Cleavage. Welcome guys. I'm Lenny. And I'm Claudia. And we have a guest today. A beautiful guest. And I'm Kenzie.

0:11 Kenzie. I feel like you need to give like a little bit more than just I'm Kenzie. And you just be like, I'm a fucking icon. Oh, Claudia. I love you. You know, I don't have to butter you up. No, I know. We don't have to butter you up. So we have Kenzie on the show with us. And if I I think the whole world knows who Kenzie is.

0:31 I mean, an icon in so many regards. I love you.

0:35 Thank you.

0:36 Keep going. Yeah, keep going. That's for later, babe. Um, we like to bring women in on fun episodes where we talk about things that I know are gonna relate to that person in particular. So when we were designing this episode, I'm like, this is Kenzie.

0:52 Is it about IBS?

0:54 No. Not a close squatty potties. I know you're a fan. Bidet's bidets, yes. It's a whole episode about bidets, exactly. No, we are gonna talk about the dating icks.

1:09 Oh, okay. Yeah.

1:11 I feel like Kenzie has like a list in her phone.

1:15 I actually do, but it's us specifically of my ex.

1:18 Really? Okay. So we want to talk about the icks because I feel like our viewership is obviously men. Mostly men. And a lot of men are just confused on what they should and shouldn't be doing, just as men, which you know it's it's it's har it's hard to exist. It's hard to exist, especially in this world.

1:40 So we want to talk about specifically things that we fine are icks, you fine are ics, and some that we found online that men would like to know specifically from a woman of your caliber if you think that these things are icks or not. Um, and if there's any that you personally think you could not recover from.

2:03 Okay.

2:04 Is there anything that comes to mind when I say ick? Like the biggest ick.

2:07 Oh, I mean my biggest ick is like I'm a big hygiene girl, you know? So I like a man that smells good, but not better than me, because I'm gonna wear a ton of perfume.

2:18unknown Yeah.

2:19 And I need you to like tone it down. Um, and I feel like that shouldn't even be said, but there's a lot of gross men out there, actually. So unfortunately, I do have to say that that is an ick because why do you smell so bad?

2:31 We just got back from Europe. I can't believe how it's 2026 and people don't Oh, it's so smelly there.

2:37 It's the smelliest. Oh my gosh. Really? Yeah, and like I went to the the Lorv. Oh however you say it. Should I say the the Louvre? The Lorv. The Lorve. The Lorva. The Louvre. Oh my god. I wanted to throw up. I was going to. Like it smelled like everybody functioned to exist.

2:55 And like now, like certain airports, like you have to take the bus to the plane. Yeah. All of them when you're in Europe, it feels like like congested with like 300 people in a bus, and none of them were deodorant, and they're holding on to the arm things. Oh my god. So like your face is like you're just in it.

3:12 You are in it.

3:13 Disgusting. Yeah. It's absolutely disgusting. Why don't they believe in deodorant there?

3:17 It's I don't know. And it's like they drink and they smoke their like lives away. Like deodorants, like where we draw the line.

3:26 I just wonder like, how would people know when they they, you know, how would they not know they smell? I know I smell so fast. Like immediately. Yeah. I know when I'm stinky. Yeah. I don't know.

3:36 Like everywhere. All all body parts. Like I know like how do you not know?

3:40 I had like a protein drink on the way over here, and I'm like, I have a little bit of protein drink breath right now. I know it.

3:48 That's like literally, Dan was told me yesterday, he's like, your breath smells. I'm like, I just had a protein shake. Yeah. Like you stinky. It's like a certain stigma. Yeah. It's chalky. It sits on your tongue. Yeah, but how you don't smell your own earnest. I don't know. Okay, guys. So that's that's a big thing.

4:03 That's a big one. Make sure you don't smell like shit. And it has nothing to do with getting the most expensive cologne. No. So like you we could even scale it back down from that. You don't have to wear, you know, a $500 fragrance. Just don't smell like shit.

4:17 And take really good showers. Like really wash yourself.

4:20 And letting the water, you know, run down your ass does not constitute as well. Right.

4:27 They're doing that. They're saying it's gay to clean your ass. Also, that so many men don't wash their feet because they think like if they're showering. They're like walking in the walking in the dirty parts. I don't know.

4:41unknown Oh my god.

4:43 I don't know. I'm hoping that this is just like Instagram bullshit that I've been fed, but you know, I do believe it because when you go to the gym, the guys are smelly. So or just not even the gym, other places.

4:54 Okay, so guys, that's that's a big one. So that is a that is an ick, so let's just get that out of the way. What's another one that our our viewers wanted to know about?

5:03 Bragging about money and status. Oh, I really hate a showboat, honestly. Showboat of any kind though. Like if you're um, like there were these guys working out next to me and they kept trying to, they were lifting so much heavier than they could. And I'm like, you're gonna hurt yourself, and I'm not even paying attention.

5:21 Yeah. This is so stupid.

5:24 Yeah, you um literally is gonna hurt yourself for for what?

5:27 Yeah. If you have money, then spend it on me or my friends. Like, I don't give a shit how much you have. Like, we can talk about that later. You don't need to like flex it all the time. I think taking care of the bill is more than enough to say I have money and I'm comfortable. Yeah, you know?

5:45 What's that reel that's like telling me you have money doesn't impress me, giving it to you. Yeah, exactly. I'm gonna see some of it then. That's I think that's a really big one because I think that's like it goes back to ego. Yeah, like for sure. That's it does all ego. Like if you have to talk about how much money you have, like I already know you have no money.

6:04 Like, I don't care. Totally fine. Especially when you're like sitting in a table with women like us three. We have our own. Yeah, don't like I don't care. Exactly. Great, I'm very happy for you. You should have money. Okay, yeah, no, and I think that to me personally has the opposite effect. The more you have to talk about it, I think you have less of it.

6:24 Oh, for sure. Yeah, yeah. Absolutely. It's a manifestation of like a bad ego. Yeah, yeah.

6:33 What's another one on the list? Let's see.

6:35 Needing constant reassurance. That's a big one. That really is a big one. I can't. Okay, it depends on where I am with you, but I it can really kill a relationship. Yeah, honestly. Yeah, because I get needing reassurance. I love reassurance. Um, compliments, just telling you can tell me I look good so many times.

6:55 What if what if he keeps asking you?

6:58 Exactly. It's like I now all of a sudden you're making me feel like you don't think you're good enough for me, and that's gonna affect your behavior. It does. Yeah, you know, they know all of a sudden, like if they're feeling insecure and those are those questions, they're like, Oh, I'm standing next to the wrong woman.

7:15 Exactly.

7:16 You know, yeah, and that sucks. It sucks. Yeah, when she shows their insecurity and right yeah, because I was gonna say, like, one of my icks would be a man who doesn't know how to celebrate a woman or like let her be hot. Um, because that also ruins relationships. Like men who claim a woman and don't let her shine.

7:37 It's like we need to win. Yeah, let me win.

7:40 It's like, don't date a baddie and not let me know. No, right. I know.

7:44 You met me in a thong bikini. Yeah, and now what did you think you were getting?

7:49 Like, yeah, like literally. That was something that happened to me when I started dating my husband at the time. Like, we were staying at, I think, at the on dolls in Hollywood, and we were going to the pool, and I come out in like a thong bikinis, like, that's what you're wearing. I'm like, you're in a relationship with the bikini model.

8:06 Like, if you want to go back to fucking rock tucky, where they were like what are the ones, like tankinis, totally covered for it, but it's not right, it's not happy. Like, I'm staying a baddie.

8:17 Yeah, like it's just there's no reason to go for the wrong girl. No, like it's uh it is important to stay in your league, you know. Yeah, I mean, financially, people do that. It's very rare that somebody of a huge different financial uh caliber are together and get married. It really doesn't happen that often as like people think it does.

8:35 I think everyone wishes it was like that, but unfortunately, wealth isn't spread that way. People date within their um their field. So you're not insecure.

8:46 Yeah. And speaking of insecurity, what about if your guy you're with or girl? Depending what what road we're going. Being too we still don't know. I mean, I know a little. I know a little, Kenzie. Don't don't be too quiet. Um, being too thirsty online. What do you think about that? If he being too thirsty.

9:09 Oh, if he oh my god, I don't like a man on Instagram. Thank you. I know. I just I get off the gram. It's for the girls. You know, like you can have one, but like maybe no, don't have what if your guy does like an August photo dump. Oh god.

9:28 Um is that an ick?

9:32 That's a huge ick. Yeah, that's icky. Yeah. I it's what if you're mostly in it? It's up me? Yeah.

9:39unknown Yeah.

9:39 That's okay. That's fine. Are we on private though? Because that what if the the the caption is August photo dumb? It's kind of that's an ick. Yeah. Yeah, I can't. No, I can't do it. I don't, I don't like the whole I've never been with a man who's an Instagram guy. It just wouldn't no. It wouldn't click.

10:06 Yeah. Maybe it would. I don't know. I guess I haven't tried it. Don't knock it till you try it. But like, I'm not turned on by you having like an online persona. What if we posted a shirtless photo? Oh, we've been seeing a lot of those.

10:19 Yeah. From our topic, yeah. Yeah, according to our page, everybody on Instagram has abs. Every man. Is it easy to keep and maintain? Yeah. We got a we literally posted a clip yesterday. It has half a million views already. Okay. And we were debating whether we like a six-pack or a dad bod. And I said in the clip, like, I don't love a six-pack because I don't like the type of person that you have to be in order to have a six-pack.

10:45 Like, we're not going to dinners, we're not doing this, that, the other. Internet went crazy. Basically. I have a six-pack. I'm going to pull image. It's like guys that are like 120 pounds and they're like, I have a six-pack. Skin and bone. I have skin and bone, so you could see a little muscle. Wow.

11:01 And every single guy in their like profile photos, just totally naked. I'm like, this is Oh my God.

11:08 I've never seen so many profiles. Oh, it didn't. It drew in real ab guys. Okay. I thought these were catfishes. I mean, I guess they could be, but.

11:16 If you looked at our post, you would think all men in the world have that's amazing.

11:21 There's like three. I don't see many of them ever.

11:23 They're all on our page. Okay. So if you can die with abs, go to that. 3,000 comments, and they all these men have abs.

11:34 Okay, so I know where I'm gonna go tonight. Yeah.

11:37 They're there. We don't want them. So mad at them.

11:41 But if they're all 120 pounds and they have abs, that's a different story.

11:46 Do you mean the guy that's like 220 with abs, and I'm like, all right, yeah, listening. But not if you're smaller than they're literally like liney size, and they're like, I have abs.

11:55 I can't, I guess I can't judge because I've dated like small like smaller men. Yeah.

11:59 So I guess were they flexing their abs and everything?

12:02 No, they were never flexing their abs in any function. Photos in the mirrors. Yeah, exactly. All the the the guys I date don't want pictures. Like I'm not getting a photo of their abs.

12:14 Yeah, no. Maybe for your like personal record.

12:16 Yeah, I would have had to take it though. Snuck it.

12:20 What's another one that that we got?

12:22 Um being rude to other people. Oh, that's a big one. Oh yeah. Yeah, that's huge. Yeah. Like if you're like rude at a restaurant. No, absolutely. I know. Um and it's actually really funny that we we brought that up.

12:40 Why? Story time.

12:43 Well, I'm like, do I share this on the on the internet right now? Um, because I had when I was in Croatia, I got really sick. And I, you know how I am around people. I'm generally a nice person unless something sh really shitty is happening. Um, and I still try to remain composed. I don't have road rage.

13:01 I'm not like this angry, bottled-up person. But um, I got really sick in Croatia. And if you see the color of my skin, I'm a ghost. And the sun just destroyed me. And I was covered in blisters and I was red and I had a fever, and it was 100 degrees outside, and I was 100 degrees inside. And I was so uncomfortable.

13:22 And I was at the beach and Croatia beaches, I mean, beaches in general are rock. Most sand is fake, but it was rocky. And I'm like looking for shade. There's umbrellas, and I'm like finding the the shade and going under them. And the man working it, working the beach, I guess, was closing them on me.

13:40 And I'm like, sir, I just need to be in the shade, waiting for my friends to leave so I can like collect myself. He's like, it costs money. And I was like, okay, how much do you need? And he didn't, he only had cash. He only accepted cash and I didn't have any. And I'm like, what? The fuck? I'm like completely please let me undo this.

13:57 I'm burning. Yeah, exactly. Keep the umbrella is insane. Exactly. And um, someone in the group uh that I was with actually had like brought it up later that I was rude to wait staff, and I was like, No. Oh my uh Kenzie snapped. A bitch came out.

14:19 That's that's different. That's different. But like if you're being rude to try to assert your dominance, that I think so unattractive.

14:27 Yeah, I think that. Yeah, I don't want to, I don't want to witness that. I'm embarrassed to be with you now.

14:34 It's and it's truly like embarrassing. And I think men think that it's like, oh, I'm gonna show her. Right. And it's like, no, no, you are showing me, and it's not it's not good, it's not what I want to see. Yeah. Okay. What about a guy that's jealous before you're even with him? Oh my god. Like protective versus possessive.

14:53 Because he's like, Do I speak from experience?

14:57 Um I've never dated anyone like that ever.

15:02 Thank God.

15:03 Fuck. Uh yeah, huge red flag. But apparently, um I didn't see them at first. It's terrible. Yeah. It's really bad. Yeah. Yeah, obsession, possessiveness. My fault is that I love when a man is a sweet man and in love with me and enamored, and I love acts of service. That's my love language. Like if you're doing things for me that are gonna stress me out when I have to do them.

15:28 Oh my god, amazing. Those types of guys honestly unfortunately end up being very obsessive and possessive. So I've experienced that.

15:36 Have you ever dated anybody that was like jealous of like your past?

15:41 Oh, yeah. I just got out of that.

15:43 Yeah.

15:44 Yeah.

15:44 Like this was before you existed.

15:47 He knew. That's why he knew who I was.

15:49 That's crazy, you know. I'm like, huh. That's crazy. Do you think you run into that a lot with like with your background?

15:55 Like, I haven't dated anyone serious enough for it to have been a problem enough, honestly. Cause I'm like untouchable. I'm like, don't fucking try to date me. And I think don't touch me.

16:07 I'm not don't do any of this.

16:13 I know. Oh, my shoe, my fuse is short right now for sure. Like I'm immediately like, nope, I'm annoyed. Immediately no. Yeah. Immediately no.

16:22 What about somebody that talks negatively about their ex?

16:26 Ooh. That is a huge red flag. Because you, I don't, it's sort of like when you go to a hairdresser, a new hairdresser, and you've like they're looking at your hair and they're like, oh, your last hairstylist did a real bad job. Like you have slit foils and like they're talking shit about my old hairdresser.

16:45 I'm like, why would that make me want to be with you? Right. You know, like that's kind of are you gonna want, are you gonna make this better? I mean, I guess you could, but it sort of gives that vibe of kind of like if they're talking about their ex, they're not over them. Yeah, that too. Yeah, exactly.

17:02 This is like a new slate. Like, we shouldn't be yeah, that is like a major, major ick to me. Even like going into like friendships, like forget about even dating somebody. But like if you constantly talk shit about people you used to be friends with, yeah, I understand people falling out, but like we don't need to consistently like talk about oh my gosh, she was such a bitch, or she was.

17:22 Yeah, like what? Yeah, also people change and evolve. Like when friendships end, it's because things just weren't going the same direction, and that's okay. That doesn't mean she's a bitch, maybe she was a few times. Who cares? Yeah, she's not gonna be a bitch to other people, maybe she will eventually again, you know.

17:39 Yeah, that's yeah, like shit talking is just kind of nasty that way. Yeah, you know, I agree with that.

17:45 Just don't talk shit, yeah. That's another really good one. These are submitted by fans.

17:52 Okay, losing his own life once he likes you. Ooh.

17:56 Oh no, like if he like stops like talking to like his friends because like you become his friends.

18:02 Oh no, that that isn't because I need girls' nights and like my me time, so I can't have that. Yeah. I've been someone's life before.

18:12 Yeah. It depends on like the person you are, because like me, for example, like I'm so and people will call it codependent, and it's fine. I need to be with my husband. Like, I'm a husband. Oh yeah, you guys are very together. We're but we're like that, but we've always been like that. Yeah. But like if somebody were to be like, you know, if they had a life before me and they stopped having a life before me because of me, I would hate that.

18:37 Yeah.

18:38 I would hate that. Me too. That would be really weird. Yeah.

18:41 No, keep keep having your own lives, keep having your own hobbies.

18:44 They're gonna still have their own thing. Yeah, yeah. Hobbies are important, activities with your friends are important. Yeah. Routine.

18:51 Yeah. If you go to the gym, yeah, keep going to the gym. Don't, you know, my god, don't stop. And this is a really big one. Not having your own opinions or backbones.

19:01 Ooh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. No. I don't like a yes man. Yeah. No. I love gray areas and I love conversation. So like I want to talk about it and like know why someone feels a certain way about something. You know? It's definitely yeah. Getting to know the depth of somebody that way. I feel like if you don't have an opinion, you just don't really know yourself very well.

19:22 Yeah. You know? Or if they're looking for your opinion to make that their opinion. Oh yeah. Yeah. No, don't don't do that. No. Yeah, I think that's that's a big one. I think we're oh, this is a good one. Uh-oh.

19:34 So you'll like this one.

19:35 Trying too hard to be an alpha.

19:38 Oh, God. Uh it goes right back to that weightlifting, guys. Like, come on. You don't no one no one who is a leader has to prove that they're a leader. Right. Ever.

19:49 Yeah. See. We can tell. We could see. And we could also very quickly tell who's a beta in that regard. Exactly. Yeah.

19:57 It's very, very apparent. Yeah. There's no like. It goes back to show boating, flexing. Nope. We don't gotta see it. Just let us figure it out.

20:08 We don't gotta see it. So if Kenzie had to break down one just your biggest ick, if you have to put one final closer on this, what is Kenzian? Biggest ick. Insecurity. Same.

20:22 Yeah. Definitely. That's huge. And I and it's crazy because that's been mine forever. Like since the beginning of dating as a teenager. I'm like, just be secure with me. You can have doubts and whatever. Like hesitation is fine. Like constant insecurity really makes me feel like you don't think you deserve me.

20:44 And that's how you and then you act that way. Yeah.

20:46 And I think a lot of men watching, they you know, watch shows like this to try to bag a girl like you. So, guys, if you're watching, that is a major no-go.

20:58 Don't be insecure. Also, tell me you watched it on this show, or else it'll just be weird that you kept it a secret.

21:03unknown Yeah.

21:04 Because people have done that to me a lot. And they've been like, no, I didn't watch that. And I'm like, I literally said that on a podcast. So and they try to like rough. Or that was a tweet. Like, come on.

21:14 That was a tweet from 2022. Cool. Well, Ken Z, thank you for sharing. Yeah, thank you. Thanks for joining us. I hope that you guys have learned how to not ick you or us or anybody else.

21:27 They won't, but hopefully it'll evolve a bit. Definitely. Thank you. Of course, thank you. Cheers. Copy and cleavage. Copy and cleavage. Till next time.