S9E31: Can you be the CEO of your life AFTER stroke?

0:00 I know everybody heard this at one time or another. You are the CEO of your life. But what does it truly mean to be the CEO? And after stroke, can I still be and how can I become that person? Well, we're going to talk about it today on Stroke Surviving the Odds of the podcast. Hello guys. I'm Karina, the host and creator behind this show.

0:27 My show is all about moving forward past the events of the stroke. And I want you to see that there is plenty of life to live after. You see, 27 years ago, I suffered a brain stem dissection that led me to coma Interlockton syndrome. But I vowed that when I was going to come back, I was going to be there for my community, share all my tricks, hacks, how I got to survive this world as a survivor. And I'm going to tell you if I can do it, anybody can. Guys, grab yourself a pen and paper. The faintest of ink is better than the best memory. Come and join me here as we are recording today's episode. Before we commence, I want to remind you that you can like, follow and subscribe on any platform that you are listening to your podcast.

1:16 You can also leave me a comment or leave me a review. That would be awesome. A five star would be amazing also. That way it's gonna tell the algorithm that the movement of stroke survivors getting better is here to stay. My voice is being heard through each and everyone of you guys. You know that, right?

1:43 So I also want to let you know that you can definitely request an episode, something you want to talk about. I'm here for you. Let me know again in the comments or in the description. I'm going to be leaving you all the ways you can get in touch with me on my social media. All right, let's get the show on the road, guys.

2:10 I'm going to be a little different when I'm explaining this and I'm going to intertwine the what it is and why do it and it'll make a lot of sense to you guys, alright, So just bear with me. You know how Yeah, right. I go from one thing to the next one, but they always merge together. But this is very clear to me what this is, because it changes our life.

2:39 Once we understand this, it changes the whole direction of our brain. Being the CEO of your own life, being the boss, being taking ownership, taking responsibility of the good, the bad and the ugly. Leading by example. Our children, like I said, you are taking back your ownership. It's your life, baby.

3:09 What do you want it to be after any major life event, guys, whether it be a stroke, any kind of trauma, a big loss, a burnout. Well, I'm sure that, like me, you have said, I feel like I'm not in the driver's seat anymore. I feel like my life is not mine anymore. And being the CEO is taking back the wheel, taking back the driver's seat, taking back control of what is yours. You see your life and your recovery and your rehabilitation does not belong to anybody else but you. Nobody can tell you how to recuperate. Only you know how.

4:08 And you know what I say the what would resist? Persist. And it's a big decision to say I'm right now. I'm going to shift some shit around and I'm going to become the best person I can be and I'm going to have the best life I can be. And whatever comes out, comes out. If it goes good, it's on me. If it goes bad, it's on me.

4:37 I had to do that thinking about five years ago when I embarked into my new single life here, and that is exactly what I had to think. I already had a strong, sorry, there's noise behind me. I already had a strong mindset, but I had to really dig deep and say shit. My circumstances don't define me.

5:07 I know that now. I need to believe it enough to take back control of my shit and stop people pleasing and stop doing things and saying things that I think other people want to hear. Being the CEO is deciding who you want to be, What type of parent you want to be after stroke? What type of stroke survivor do you want to be? How do you want to show up to the world? So let me ask you this, and you're not going to answer me because it's going to be a rhetorical question, but if you have your pen and paper, I would like for you to write down the answer to yourself.

5:53 There's no right or wrong answer, guys. It's always what's good for you, alright? Do you find that in these last years, however long your stroke was, do you find that you've been showing up the way you want to for yourself and for others? Do you feel like you want to? Those are very big questions, guys.

6:32 Again, there's no right or wrong, but by answering this question, it will help you figure out your next move. You know, when the stroke happened, guys, it, it was like a tornado. I've, I think I spent like three seasons of mine explaining the tornado. It deshuffles everything. Everything we know in our lives changes and it's not just about our bodies and about our conitive and all that, but it's really everything.

7:13 Our relationships with everybody, not just our spouses, the way we parent our children. After stroke, I had a young mate, my daughter was 16 months. It changes financial, obviously finances, for I was blessed that my husband took care of me at the time. I was blessed that we were financially stable and he really stepped up.

7:45 But I also know the reality is that it really damaged a lot of shit out there. And I'm so sorry about that. But again, by you becoming that CEO and being truthful to you, you have the control. Maybe your body is not cooperating the way you want it to, but your brain is fully functional. Therefore, maybe there is a way for you to bring some income at home, even if it's not a full paycheck, just a little bit to make you feel normal again, make you feel the way you used to, make you feel like you're contributing. Being the CEO gives you that control. Now #2 is about what I just talked about. It's replacing chaos with clarity. So the tornado is chaos.

8:44 It's very chaotic. It really fucks everything up. But right now when you're the CEO, when you're the boss lady that you are. And I'm saying lady because the majority of my listeners are my boss babes. But of course I have gentlemen listening to the show. So you are a bad ass boss yourself. OK, the CEO hire, Think of it. Think of it guys in a big corporation, you know, the CEO, the big jish on top on top there he hires and fires and he makes all the decisions.

9:24 He doesn't dabble. He doesn't think what ifs. He doesn't think what are they going to think about? No, fuck that shit. He decides what goes on and he has a he has a team. He has your team is the people around you. You are the CEO and everybody else are your team members. What are you going to do?

9:49 Are you just going to sit in the background and become invisible or stay invisible, or are you going to step up and give a sense of direction? I've said many times in the past, guys that when you're bashing yourself, when you talk negative, when you curse at your stroke, there's no wonder why the people that live with you also do that and you're only pointing out the negative. So it's only normal that they feel the negative. But when you take back that control, holy shit, at first they're going to be like, whoa, what's going on? And then they're going to follow you. They're going to follow your rhythm, not your actions and what not your rhythm.

10:43 If you have a good strong mindset, they will say shit. If she can do it, I can do it too. OK. When you take ownership, you adapt to each and every circumstances. And I don't know why, but right now the the, the show Survivor on TV and I never really watched it, but I know what it's about. You know, on Survivor, they take ownership of, they're placed on an island and they take on the ship of if they live or die, if they gain weight or lose weight, if they die of hunger or they eat, you know, they take they take control of what's in front of them. They adapt, right?

11:32 They adapt to the jungle. Well, we stroke survivors also adapt and it's scary as shit guys, but we adapt and we don't ask what is happening to me. Oh my God, no, fuck that shit. You can ask what's going on to you, but you also have to think, OK, that happened, but what can I do next to make it feel better, Make things better So that clarity you get that clarity is powerful. You are empowering yourself.

12:18 I promise you'll thank me. You'll thank me to have brought up the subject. The third reason, when you become your your own CEO, your own boss, you connect with purpose. Maybe you never had purpose, maybe you never thought of it. What is my purpose? And I find that I asked myself that question a lot after stroke because it seemed like I was just existing before I was living. I was living before my stroke, but I was existing because it was all about the show.

13:02 But after the stroke, everything clicked in my head and it made me wonder who the freak am I and what do I want? So asking yourself, who am I after stroke? Because we're completely different. It's normal. It's a very heavy question, scary as hell. But when you do become that CEO, it means that you're willing to rediscover you're why?

13:29 Why you get up in the morning? Do you want to get up in the morning or do you do it because you have to? If you do it because you have to, it's OK. There's nothing wrong with that. But is it a recurring, I feel like I have to get up or is it just today I'm I'm kind of blue. Those are questions you need to ask.

13:55 It gives you mission, it gives you joy. It gives you advocacy. Guys, I always say you, you, you, you are your best advocate. Nobody can talk about you and about what you need more than yourself, right? So I talked about discovering and rediscovering before, well, guess what? I came across my brain and I created an ebook. Yes, Reclaim your identity after stroke. I'm charging to the world a little baby fraction, OK? But you guys, my listeners, I love you and I'm so grateful to each and everyone of you that I'm giving it to you. And in the book, you have a lot of these questions that are going to awaken your senses.

14:49 They're going to help you discover and rediscover who you are. So please comment ebook and I'm more than happy and I'll be sending it to you. OK, That's what we are going to do. Now. Last thing that I want to bring up, when you take back that control, you're building your own self-confidence and you're giving hope to other people.

15:18 Every single time you get up, you leave the house, you talk to people, you give hope. So right now, by being the CEO, you are going to be be gaining control over yourself and you're going to say shit. I can still lead. I don't have to lead a crowd, but I can lead my own life. I'm the bomb. I can still grow.

15:41 I can still learn. Even though I have cognitive difficulties and I can't talk the way I used to, when I can't write the way I used to, I can still learn. That is huge. So just that should be enough to give you hope and you remember what I just said when you have hope, you're giving hope to others sounds good Listen guys, this is what I have for you. Make sure you like follow and subscribe wherever you listen to your podcast.

16:16 Make sure you also share the podcast with someone and in the comments you can write ebook and it'll be my pleasure to send you my reclaimed your identity after stroke where you have self discovery questions. I don't do quotes. I'm not that type of person. I really want you to feel like I'm there with you, but it's all on you.

16:42 You are taking back that control. The minute you or you ask me ebook, you are taking back control. You are the bomb. Remember, I love you immensely and I will talk to you very shortly. Bye.