Slippery When Wet (S1 Ep17 "There Won't Be Trumpets")

Welcome to desperately Devoted.

Think of us as your favorite neighbors as we chat about life and relationships, all.

While we revisit the iconic show Desperate Housewives together.

I'm Terry Hatcher, I'm Andrea Bowen, and I'm Emerson Tenny. Welcome back to another week. This week we are talking about episode seventeen. Title was there won't be trumpets. That's a little pressing. There will not be any trumpets. I would like trumpets. You know, some podcasts have these, Like my friend has a podcast where he'll go it's kind of like related to time and like looking back.

At history, and so.

He'll say, like, you know, he'll be like, I think this is where the clip clops would enter, and so like the producers would add like a little horse going copy clip copy.

But so maybe we can get our producer to add some trumpets.

Yes, we need to push for trumpets because this one is called there won't be trumpets. So I guess there won't be any trumpets, but it would be like if you entered a room and there were like trumpets.

Good more.

Instead, we're gonna have to add in like a wamp.

There's no clunk clunk, clunk down the stairs.

Okay, So this aired originally on April third in two thousand and five, directed by Jeff Melman and written by a bunch of guys. I love when like three people get the credit for writing. There was a very special guest star in this episode, Oscar winning Marlee Matlin.

So I just I have to say.

I know that Marley Mattlin's making her big Desperate Housewives appearance, but I have loved her and first started loving her on The L Word. She played this fabulous artist named Jody Lerner who ends up having a kind of long relationship with Bet Porter, who's played by Jennifer Beal. And anyway, there's a little lesbian tea for you on Marlee, and I think she's amazing.

So I was, okay, well, I have some more tea. And it's a bit of a surprise for you too.

What is it.

I called Martha Matlin herself this morning, and her and I had a conversation, but.

I didn't tell her I loved her in The L Word.

But I didn't, but her and I talked about the L Word.

So I have written down here like lots of things that we talked about that I'm going to share with.

You guys, now, yeah, yes, well, here you go. Surprise Mom got to TV.

Mom got to talk to Marley Mattlin, and she was so gracious. She was actually on her way to Cleveland to do a speech, like I'm sure some sort of inspirational speech, and she was at the airport, and so she got on the phone with me and I we first bonded.

Over the fact that we both have a great love of cats.

Her cat is a part Russian Blue, part Tabby, definitely. She described it as a mutt, which, you know, I told her that I've had many many cats through my many many decades of adulthood, and almost all of them have been mutts, which are usually the best personalities in the So we bonded over our great love of cats.

And she also has a daughter close to your age, twenty nine, who just had her first child to grandma.

So I feel like, yeah, there.

Was like there is some energy, like both my daughters on the thing are kind of like splitting Marley's life a little bit. Okay, So when I got to asking her about the show, she did have one very specific memory, and I think you guys are going to love this I can't well, she said to me, I don't have a lot of memories. But the thing I do remember that she recalled the crew struggling so hard to not laugh out loud as they got to the part in the scene where her character and Lynette where she's yelling at Lynette, but the little girl is doing the translating, and the little the whole scene ends.

With Marley saying bitch, yes. And she remembers.

The whole crew like just dying, falling off their chairs when she called Lynette a bitch. And and then we talked about comedy, and she actually shared with me that she really wants to do more comedy, that she's very known for drama. Of course, she's a Oscar Oscar winner for Children of a Lesser God and and I am.

We were talking about how which I really believe this, that.

The best comedy, darker not comes from being rooted in truth and I and I was saying to her that and complimenting her that the reason I thought that scene was so incredible was she was rooted in such disdain and anger with Lynette for interfering in her marriage, and and it and and all of that sort of like hostility led up to the comedic punchline of the word bitch, and so she remembered that. She also remembered like the process of getting the part she was offered it. It came through her agent, and she said, when she approaches things as a guest star, she's always a little nervous and the first thing she sort of thinks about is do I know anybody there, because it's uncomfortable for her to go, you know, when she doesn't know anybody. And

she remembered that she knew Nicolette. And the reason she knew Nicolette is because at the time of when La Law is a show that was on TV a long time ago, Marley was dating David Kelly and Nicolette was dating Harry Hamlin, and.

So this is how their paths crossed.

And I was like, and I shared with her, I was like, oh my god, does Hollywood just exist by who stated it?

Who?

Like pretty much?

Yeah, I know.

It's kind of It's also like a little on topic at the little meta for this episode, considering that it explores like couples dating other couples, and then you know, like it's just very interesting that that's how they were connected.

Yeah, And I also thought it was a funny connection that one of the first kind of guest starring roles I did was on La Law and it was quite memorable because I was naked, and so that was a show on I walked into Harry Hamlin's office naked because I think I was I was like, he was my lawyer. I was a client from like a nudist colony or something classic and anyway, but the whole like joke or the whole gimmick of the thing was that they had a jar of pencils on his desk, and so when the camera shot across Harry to me, you didn't see my the JJ it was covered by pencils sticking out of a pencil jar. That's my That's what I remember about.

But Harry Hampton and Law.

Well, this was an amazing surprise for both of us.

That's so cool. That is so cool.

And I love that you got to talk to her and that she, you know, got to share her experience of being on Despert Housewives. Yeah.

I know, but she did mention that when she did the L words, she was very comfortable because she's longtime friends with Jennifer Beale.

So bad feel the chemistry. The chemistry was palpable and interesting. I actually think about the L word a lot in terms of shows that ran around the same time in the early two thousands, for about as long as Desper Housewives ran. There's actually like certain moments in the L Word where they referenced Desper Housewives. I don't know, they're playing running charades and no one can guess.

I think it's actually you, mom, Like no one can.

Guess who Terry Hatcher is, and they're like, it's like the straight person show, Like it's the show that everybody.

Oh yeah, Desperate Housewives is this straight person show. I think there was a I think we had a nice solid fan base mabe.

In this This episode certainly explores themes of that.

I mean a lot happens. Obviously. We have Bunita wakes.

Up from her coma, desperate to tell Carlos Gavy's cheating on him, only to fall down the stairs and die.

I mean, like, wow, what a crazy cold open again.

She wakes up from her coma, and I truly obviously, you know, we've talked about how we don't remember these things, but I was like, oh, she's awake, and I just thought that was gonna she was gonna come back.

To the show, and then so quickly she dies.

As soon as you see that, as soon as you see that yellow warning floor wet mopping.

Sign, you knew it was all over.

But I love so she's down and her last words are tell Carlos his wife is cheating on him, which, of course the nurse doesn't remember, doesn't expose, but it did kind of make me think, like, you know, like I would hope this would not be my last word.

Like I thought, oh.

God, yeah, that's saying something.

I mean, it's it's like really saying a lot of things about if your last moments are trying to expose someone else's affair, like what is the quality of the life that you have lived up until that moment? Right?

Actually makes me sad for Wenita.

I know, I know it does.

Had such a mission, and I guess she had woken up from her coma after replaying this or dreaming of this opportunity to get to tell Carlos, and so when she fell down the stairs and realized maybe this was her last chance. I guess that's she just was like, this is what I'm going to take. But it is interesting right to consider what.

Your last words would be or do your mass moment. Yeah, no, I know, I actually do.

I mean, you know, I mean death is an interesting subject, and imagining your death is an interesting idea. I actually think it's an important idea. I think, you know it's not good to ruminate on it, but I do think the more we grasphold of life, embracing the finality of our actual death, our own mortality, I think you have an opportunity to have a better life, you know, because you're living it in a more present, grateful way.

And I mean, I don't know. I can't decide if I'd rather.

Be just like hit by a bus and like just have it be over, or like if I want to have some slow evolving disease where I get to make sure I say goodbye to everybody and apologize for every last minuche.

Event that I like that you went immediately to apology because I don't know.

I was thinking.

I have a family friend who passed away quite a few years ago, but who had cancer and who knew that he was going to die for a long time, and his family friend through my dad, and I remember my dad telling me that there was actually something really beautiful about the last couple of months of his life.

They had a house out on the East Coast and their friends came to visit him. My dad and came out to visit him, and he said, you know, he spent like maybe an hour.

Or two sitting in his room talking with him.

He was at home, and when he went to leave, he grabbed my dad's hand and he was like bye.

My dad was like yeah, yeah, bye, and he was like no, you know, like goodbye.

Oh.

And I just think it really is a kind of I mean, it makes me cry, but it's also the ability to know that as opposed to just all the things that are left unsaid, I think is ultimately probably a gift, although difficult to have to be that conscious.

Yeah, I don't know.

It's hard to know, Like what is the if you had to say and how you're you're going to go. Would you rather have advanced knowledge of it or would you rather it be spontaneous.

I do like the idea of going out on a laugh.

I like the idea of leaving, leaving my loved ones with a laugh.

I don't know what my last.

Words would be in that instant, something like well that's my time.

I'm gonna say that's all for now.

You're you're you're a stand up. Then apparently they're giving down, like yeah, you're giving the.

Flash, and it's like, well, that's my time. Yeah.

It's interesting the idea of like, well, now we're fantasizing about death. But I do think the idea of fantasy. It opens on Mary Alice saying, you know, what do people dream of? And she goes through all the different people in the hospital, the nurse who's dreaming of finally leaving her husband, and the security man who's dreaming of finally retiring, and ultimately lands on Wnita, who, before she's woken up from her coma and died, is dreaming about telling Carlos the truth about Gabby's affair. But I think this ties into a larger theme of the episode too, with Susan's fantasies about Mike and this general idea of fantasy and what do we imagine for ourselves and even on a what Bree has maybe imagined for her son,

and then how that changes when Andrew goes off to the youth camp, and ultimately the revelation when he comes out to her and Rex later in the episode. But it made me think a lot about and I'm curious to know but both of you what you dream of, and also specifically thinking about Susan fantasizing about Mike in the very beginning of the episode when he's walking by, and he ultimately ends up giving her the letter that then she's very torn up about if she reads or doesn't read, and ultimately doesn't read. But I love the montage of cuts of all the different ways that he could like be the hero and open the door, and I love all the different ways they end up still kissing at the end of it. And I was curious,

you know, what lengths have you ever gone to imagine someone in your life could be who you want? You know, either someone you're dating or a friend. And I do think it kind of comes into play again this question of what do you do to preserve the fantasy of someone or do you crave the reality of it, Because ultimately, I think Susan not reading the letter from Mike in a way is letting her continue to live in this fantasy.

I have no answer to that.

I also really enjoyed that little succession of opening the door to the different possible scenarios and the day dream of him coming over and what that could look like, especially the last one.

Where he's pointing the gun.

Oh my god.

She stakes kept getting raised, but the kisses were always fantastic.

Yeah, I guess I definitely.

I don't have a consistency I would say with my dreams being like categorized as one thing or another.

I think I'm a problem solver in my dreams.

Often I think my subconscious is working out issues that my wake state has been worried about. And then I go to sleep and I kind of hate that. I really would love to be doing fabulous things in my dreams instead of like trying to solve problems. It's like I worry about them in the day and then I also worry about.

Them at night. But I did.

I did find it really interesting as a character trait for Susan that she doesn't ultimately read the letter like I would have guessed if someone had asked, do you think Susan as a character would open the letter or not? I would have guessed that she immediately would have read it. Like I think, it's it's surprising to me that that she ultimately chooses to return it unread, and you think.

And she does that because she's just going to be done with this relationship, and that is her way of trying to finalize it, like I'm just not going to keep going back to this no matter what it says.

Right.

I guess it's the idea of because Mary Alice has a line later in the episode about like sometimes you're going to have to just provide the answers for yourself or something like that.

So I guess it's it's a.

Closure type of thing for Susan, like I don't need I don't I don't want or need this information to.

Move on.

I don't want to be swayed. I want to feel what I feel and move on from it.

I guess is that I mean, I.

Guess the thing for Susan in that moment also is that she's not sure she believes anything that he's saying anyways, So what would be the point of reading a letter if you if you already know that you don't have the trust and the faith of what somebody is saying is true? What would be the point? And I think there's some reason to that. I also think there's like a bigger thing here that tracks so much through society, this idea of especially for women, for girls, of having a hero, of waiting for some like Night in Shining Armor to come galloping along, which is a little bit what comedically was so great about those little quick things antasies between Mike and Susan. They all were like the cover of a Daniel Steele novel, you know, like that's

that's what they each one individually.

Felt like a new novel.

But as a mom, I really tried to be aware in raising you Emerson of like not I mean, I didn't avoid Disney necessarily, you know, we love Disney movies, but in talking about them in role modeling for you, I guess, especially as a single mom, you know, I never wanted you to feel like you weren't empowered to accomplish things on your own, and that there was going to be some hero that came through and like fixed every problem for you, because it's a balancing act of like that's nice, Like I'm not saying don't have a hero like Rosar can be inspirational and aspirational and and we talked about in other episodes, We've talked about how it is actually good and vulnerable to allow yourself to need help.

But I also.

Don't think it's great that there's this messaging that's kind of pervasive to young girls, which is you need the prince to come along and make your life.

Okay, oh absolutely.

I mean I have to say, I think you really did model for me, being as much of a powerhouse of a working single mom.

As you were.

This idea that I kind of never had the fantasy that someone was going to provide the lifestyle that I wanted for me. I really felt like, whatever I want in my life, I will get for myself. And then I want to have a you know, I want to be in a partnership. I've known that I've wanted that, but it felt like it felt very separate from being taken care of. A partnership felt more like, look at this rich life that I get to cultivate and then share with someone, maybe even to the extent of like I have found myself in dynamics where I am much more of a caretaker in certain relationships, and that's actually something that I can work on, accepting help or accepting relationships where I feel a little.

Bit more taken care of.

But I think I think it's interesting and I think you're right that idea really is baked into a lot of the women in this show's ideology.

Yeah, and I think trying along with that, wanting to be saved, wanting to be rescued. It's the flip side of that of the victim, you know, playing the victim, or having a victim's mindset and mentality, which we kind of get into a little bit in this episode as well with Susan and the contractor.

Yeah, so that part of the story that happens is that in Susan's sort of effort to like forget about Mike, this contractor that's rebuilding Edie's house sort of asks her out for burritos, by the way, and I was like, are burritos?

And we talk about the things.

That end up in the Yeah, the things that end up in the writers writers rooms that they're obsessed with. They're obsessed with teenage John and his rubber duckies. They're obsessed with lawns and flowers and and now your appearance of your house looks, and now they're obsessed with burritos.

That's my fridon they were eating.

When I was growing all of those inches and eating burritos out.

Probably were anyways, So this is an interesting thing I actually wanted to get into. So in this scenario, I guess Edie had also gone on one date with the contractor, and then the contractor asks Susan out and he tells her that he's not interested in Edie. And Susan goes to Edie and says, like, you know, the contractor asked me out. Is it okay if I go out with him?

I know you had gone out with him, but you're not going out with him anymore. And Edie's like, no, you can't go out with them. And she's like, but you're not going out with them, and she's like, I don't care. You can't go out with them either, Like I'm not gonna go out with them, but neither can you, And and Susan sort of like, well I don't that's not that doesn't seem fair, that doesn't seem right, Like you you passed at this point, you know, like, and so I thought that was what do we think of that? Like, what do we think of you.

Mean dating your friends? Like dating people that your friends have dated.

Is I think?

But also I think the word friendship. I mean, this is you know, our eady and season friends. I mean, I don't know, like they live on the same street.

I think it's case. I think it's case by case.

Like to kind of to your point, Terry, It's like you have to judge two things here the friendship itself, like how how strong is the friendship? Is it someone you're super super close with and you've had a long standing relationship with or is it like a work colleague, you know, like where where where on the spectrum is that level of friendship?

And then I also think it's the same thing.

Like where on the spectrum is the level of the seriousness of the relationship that was had a one date with someone where it didn't take and it didn't work out and maybe there was no physical connection. Is different than like, oh, I dated this person for two years and they were you know, I thought they were one of the loves of my life. Like, so I think it depends there's there's different I would have a different reaction to the scenario depending on the post factor that you.

Have a room for there to be gray area.

Emerson, it sounded like you were just going to be like it's cut and dry, No, oh, were.

You gonna have at all? I feel like I aired on the side of I think it's weird. Susan even asked Eadie before going out, Oh, I kind of was like, I sort of felt like, if it's not the scenario that you've described, Andrea, of I do think there are things that are cut and dry. I think if one of your friends has dated someone for many years or even a significant couple of months and really had their heart broken or something, and then you go out with that like that to me does feel wrong. I don't think that I could do that, and I certainly couldn't do it unless I, like, I don't know how I had a friendship with this person for years and years and years since they dated, and then we realized we thought we maybe were the love of each other's lives

and then we would like have to go talk to the front like I don't know, but.

That's hard to imagine that scenario.

But in this case, I feel like it's one contractor it's one burrito. Edie so kind of flippantly says, you know, like she's not mixing pleasure and commitment.

I think Susan should.

Have gone on the date, saw how it went, and then said something to Edie if she thought she was gonna go this isn't likely.

For forgiveness, not permission mindset.

I think with Edie.

That makes sense because Edie's at the end of this Edie fires the contractor and ends her tentative friendship with Susan anyway, Like, so it's a it's a it has it ends up having consequences, but it does, like you know what, I think, what pushed my button? It's funny because Edie has a line where she says, Susan, you know, to push my buttons. I'm trying to be friends with you, and you just keep pushing every button and I'm never gonna be able to be friends with you. But like this scene kind of pushed my button because I just felt like I don't know, I get and maybe I still struggle with this, like are you allowed to ask for what you want like without feeling.

Bad about it?

I mean, and I hear both of you guys saying in this instance, like you're saying Susan should have just gone on the date, like it wasn't that big of a deal, and but I and then actually towards the end of this episode, Susan gets accused also of like inviting the drama, in which, as I remember when I was playing it, I always kind of felt like that's unfair, Like I did like that label, and I mean I didn't love it. As an actress, I didn't love it, you know. I think other actors feel this way. And even if your character is like a murderer or whatever, you I think when you're playing a character, you get protective of your character, and in a TV show where their personality sort of continues to grow and expand you

can feel defensive of like I don't think I don't think Susan would do that.

I mean.

I felt defensive of Susan.

I was like, I also felt defensive of the whole scenario because I thought, hold on, like this guy, she said no to this guy twice, and you kind of keep showing up around the tire and asking her out, and she says she's not really in a place to go out, so it should be no surprise that she vomits about you know, Mike on her date, which I do want to circle back to, if either of you have taken that on a date, just drop it about your an ax.

That's a really bad move.

But like, of course, she's not really ready, and I feel like she said that and then gets talked into going on this date and then gets told she invites the drama in and I think I think I was on Susan's side in this scenario. I felt bad for her, although I did also Susan goes out with Mike the plumber.

Now Susan's going out with a contractor.

She seems to have a type. Do either of you think that you have a type when it comes to.

I definitely have a type. I think everyone in my life would say that I have a type.

Oh, what's your type?

M I think, I like, uh, gosh, you know what is What is the way to describe my type?

I like, Well, they've got to have we've got to have.

An overlap in our sense of humor. That has to be a big thing, you know.

I always say that my husband and I are in equal.

Parts, like we are both on the extreme ends of being very serious people who take things very seriously and can take ourselves very seriously, and then on the polar opposite are.

Like deeply, deeply ridiculous and silly to the same degrees on both ends of the spectrum.

So that's kind of I think really important to me, you know, physically. Uh, I very much don't enjoy two blonde people together, So I only have dated brunettes. Yeah, it's weird to me. I'm like, it's just not my thing. No offense to anything.

I don't enjoy two blonde people together.

Well, I often say two blondes don't make it right.

Oh gosh, that's really funny.

Well, there was another inconsistency here, you know, like a couple episodes ago, Susan was changing Edie's tire on the way to get rid of Martha Hoover's ashes, and then here you have her just seemingly uncapable of dealing with her own tire situation on her own car. And I don't remember what I did say in the time, but I guarantee you I, as the actress, said to some writer, why is Susan incapable of taking care of this tire issue?

And I feel like it's because it was a plot point, Like you had to have them driving off the road at the end, and so the tire had to be And this is where like these inconsistencies, I'm sure that I was defensive about you're making Susan look like an idiot, and I don't like it, and I do, and I always said this, I don't think the audience is gonna like it either, And I do think like as Susan became that quote unquote like annoying.

You know, I mean people said that about her.

I think these are like reasons why, you know, I think audiences are not dumb, and they're rooting for these characters and they fall in love with them. And so when you do something like that, you go like, well, wait, Susan did the tire before, Like why can she suddenly not do the tire?

What's happening here Anywayeah?

Totally that I as a viewer of other shows and very critical when those things pop up. So, you know, I think that's a good catch on your on your part and is super interesting.

Pivoting to another.

Couple storyline going on, So we've got Mike and the contractor. But then we've got, of course, where Marlin's guest starring role comes in, which is the setup for Lynette and Tom storyline of this episode with having this double date and then playing the tennis and then all the conversations that come up about respect because her husband Marley Matlin's character's husband on the show is so awful.

I mean, he's such a cherk.

Yeah, he's a erk.

Oh my god, just behind her back because she can't hear him, and he's saying really horrible things about her to Tom and Lynette and.

Including actually being like, well what she can't hear? Like it is right? I was like, whoa, Oh my god, I hate this.

And so what happens is Lynette goes to Marley's character and tries to say, hey, you know, your husband's not being so great and he's saying bad things about you, and she and Lynette also confronts the husband like, you know, you shouldn't be acting like this, and and and that's and then Marley's character gets so mad, which it at that she she does not think Lynette should have gotten involved at all. And that's when Marlee's character's daughter has to like say everything that Marlee is signing, which ends in You're a bitch, which is just so classic and great, and all three, all.

Three of them were so good.

Happy, I am Marlee and Felicity and the little girl great.

We're all so good.

Do you think where do you fall on this?

I think it's really complicated when friends and couple friends specifically are having issues. And this is unique because it's a very new couple friend. Where do you fall on that it's my place to get involved if I think is something's wrong and call it out, or it's their relationship and I need to stay outside of it. Like, I think this is really complex. I know I have definitely had this with friends who.

Well, what did you do? What's an example of what you did?

I think without like disclosing anything about my my friend as they've worked it out. But I have had like a serious couple friend who were going through a longer period of hardship, and it was something that I talked to my partner at the time about of like, I kind of want to say something, but I also feel like it's not.

Really my place.

And I think it's complicated when you're friends with both people in the couple.

And I think the line.

That I ultimately ended up taking was I am here for you both to talk to me. I am not going to share anything that either of you say to me, and I will try to offer you my most unbiased reflection back to you of what I hear you saying to me, whether that is something that you're unhappy about or something that you wish would change, and other than that, I think that's really all that I can offer. And and just I kept saying, like, I love you both, and I think the things that you're feeling and working through are really real, and if you are not able to get to the other side of that together, I still think you're both amazing people. And if you are, then that's great, And I'm really rooting ultimately for each

of your individual happiness, whether that's together or apart.

I think I like the idea of not meddling in someone else's relationship, like I understand that as a concept, but I and a way of respecting someone else's decisions because not what I think is fine in a relationship doesn't necessarily mean that's what someone else chooses.

However, I think.

I would fall more like a Lynette than a Tom, like I think in this episode, if this was the situation I was presented with, I would be speaking, speaking up and speaking out and maybe Josh, my husband, would have to be like, hey, maybe you shouldn't stick your nose in there. But I feel like I wouldn't be able to.

Not Yeah, no, I know, it's tricky. It's really tricky.

I mean the relationship that comes to mind the most for me is my parents, you know, like, and I've been in the middle of that my whole life and it has not served me well. And you know it, and I've learned as an adult it's not my business. Actually, how two people cheerat each other, it's not my business.

Yeah.

The dance that two people choose to do with each other is really their dance. Speaking of dances, the other part of this episode that really stood out to me, because I have a fun fact about it, was Gabby and Carlos preparing for what he was a funeral, and we actually get to see the funeral where, of course they get into this big fight because Carlos has really rolled out the red.

Carpet that he has the horse and carriage and gotten literally the horse and carriage.

And the fun fact about that episode is I was a background actor in this scene. I will say you the image and I remember filming it. I'm walking next to someone who maybe looks like she's Wenita's relative, right in the two of you and Andrea, and I'm holding a little red rose and I'm in black and my hairs and it's like one pan as we pan from Edie to Susan and Julie, but you.

See a little girl carrying a rose and it's me.

And I remember I was visiting set while you were shooting that, and I like, you must have put me in to the episode.

And it was such a This podcast episode is just full of surprises.

Oh my gosh, that is crazy. How did we miss that? Andrew That?

I don't know, but my gosh, I love that.

I think the only reason, the only reason I caught it is because as I was watching the scene, I remembered being on set for that and being in the episode, so.

That I was actually going to ask Andrea, because you know, she was young, not as young as you, but I was going to say, you were also in that scene.

Do you remember?

Was that the cemetery we used to all go out to out in like Pasadena somewhere or somewhere out there.

Right, Yeah, I was gonna say, this cemetery is almost I mean, it's probably getting paid like a series regular because at a certain point we were spending so much time out there in the Pasadena cemetery, which is.

A beautiful it happens to be a very beautiful cemetery. But also I was like, really used it up?

Do you remember anything about that scene or being in it or anything?

I do.

There's two There's two things I want to note, which is like, one, the fashion in that little as everyone's strolling is so ridiculous but very fun. Like what I they really were just like, let's have fun with this. Everybody's going to dress up in this very caricature like version of themselves at a funeral. But the reason I remember this scene so well is because I'm not in this episode very much. This might be the only part of the episode I'm in. But I loved my line in this episode. I was so excited to say that line.

I thought it was so funny, which is when he is talking about Edie and how you know, she's kind of complaining like, well, I don't.

Really understand why I can't go.

I don't remember exactly Susan's lead up line, but she's, you know, kind of just being silly, and Julie just looks at her and then says, I'm gonna mourn now. And I loved it, and I thought it was so great, and I was so honored that they gave me such a great line.

Oh, that's a good memory. That's a good memory. Let's see, is there anything to be.

I feel like.

The one other storyline that also really jumped out at me talking about like not immediate personal experience, but was very evocative for the time and like continues to still be relevant is the storyline with Brion Rex really struggling with Andrew. Andrew gets expelled for smoking pot and Brie wants to send him to this kind of like children's youth teen youth camp, which actually made me think of my friend has a show that just came out on Netflix that not that long ago called Wayward. It's May Martin's show and is all about kind of the horrors of this youth camp and inspired by one of May's close friends who they grew up with who ended up going to a youth camp.

And in Wayward they do the whole.

Like the people come to your house and take you, but it's actually like an abduction kind of style, where here Brien Rex got to Warren Andrew before he got taken, and in Wayward they come and they put a bag over the girl who's going there's head and like handcuff.

Again I like to remind people this is like ABC at nine o'clock on regular television, not HBO, not you know, not Netflix, and that they were doing these kinds of storylines, and I'm so grateful that I never had to take discipline to that level. I mean, I just I cannot imagine and what parents go through when there's that kind of complicated behavior issues.

Yeah, my heart just totally was breaking for both bree and Rex. But really, I mean you can see the pain and the suffering in that choice all over you know, Breez's face, and then of course that she's taking the brunt of the blame. I mean, Andrew blames free way more than he blames Rex. Right, So the person who's who's really kind of forced to reckon with I'm trying to do the right thing for my son and knowing that that is risking our relationship potentially forever, is falling to break.

Gosh.

I really, I just I steel myself for maybe not that exact moment in life.

Hopefully I don't have to face that.

But for those hard moments when you have to decide can can what is right be the most painful thing as well?

To have to go through and to have to watch your child go through.

The one thing I will say that I think my mom has said over the years, because I feel like, Mom, I remember you saying, you know, I.

She's like, you were such She would say, you were such a good kid.

And I don't know what I would have done if you weren't, because I have no idea how I would have, Like, I don't know what I would have done if you weren't such a good kid. But the other thing that you've said, which I think is really true, and Andrew, I'm sure you will find on this journey into motherhood is that my friends who I grew up with, who did end up having I mean, and they're wonderful people now, but ended up having tough periods of high school and more in their adolescents and teenage years where things like what we see the Andrew character dealing with were coming up.

I remember my.

Mom always saying, you know.

The seeds of that issue were planted back when they were like five and six, and in parenting choices and the kind of erosion of trust and maybe authority or boundaries which we kind of see Lynette deal with with her kids. You know, throughout the season that the seeds for that behavior that now as a teenager has much bigger consequences were set up at a really young age.

So to not to say like it's too late if you're having your teenager be going through a lot of really big issues, but I do think having really mindful parenting at a young age, and I saw that even working as a kindergarten teacher helps sow the seeds to be able to tackle to more difficult conversations or more conflict as your child.

So do we like seventeen? Do we like this episode?

I mean, I think all of the episodes of the first season are you know, are really great episodes of television in the spectrum of this particular run as we've been watching up until now. I will say I didn't latch onto as much in seventeen as I have in other episodes.

Not even because well I found out that now I think Andrew and I are going to go back and watch it again just.

To be able to now I might favorite episode.

And I think all of our listeners, I think, you know.

We're desperately devoted to you, but like you, you are desperately devoted to the show. Enough we know that you are also going to back, go back and freeze frame. And you know what, that would be a fun thing, like send us your freeze frame of you to our Instagram, send us a freeze frame of you in front of your television with Emerson with her little rose behind.

You, and good luck, because it's one that's the perfect kind of Easter Egg, you know, an episode easter egg appearance.

Okay, well that was another great episode and I think highlighted by the fact that I got to call Marley Matlin and actually speak to her on the phone. And by the way, I want to mention that she has.

A documentary out.

It's called Marlee Matlin Not Alone Anymore, and you can see it on Amazon or Apple. So check that out and join us next week because we are desperately devoted to you.

Slippery When Wet (S1 Ep17 "There Won't Be Trumpets")

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