S9E9: Can you control the uncontrollable?

Hello my beautiful survivors, how are you? This is Karina, the host and creator of this top 2 podcast. The show is all about you moving forward past the events of the stroke. Yes, I share my story, but also my tricks, hacks, and how choose how I got to survive this world as a stroke survivor for the past 27 years, I suffered a brain stem dissection that led me to coma in the Lockton syndrome. But you can see that I'm here with you guys right now. Grab yourself a pen and paper because the faintest of ink is better than the best memory.

Come and join me here as we're recording today's show. Before we commence today's show, I would like to tell you guys and remind you rather to like and follow on any platforms where you listen to your podcast. I'm going to leave you in my description, my link to my YouTube channel. Make sure that you hit that bell and you subscribe. That way you will not be missing any of the episodes or the content that I will be putting up. I'm also working in preparing a in person event in the Montreal region.

I will give you a little bit more about that as time progresses. Make sure also that you download the episode. That way today you can just sit back, listen, relax, take on the content, maybe get your juices going in your mind and by downloading you can then listen and maybe take notes on certain things.

I know that I like to take notes in shows that I listen to that offer me some transformation. Funny thing is that I'm always saying what good use is information without transformation? They go hand in hand. So this is what I'm offering you guys right now. What do you think? We get the show on the road.

Here's a question for you. Can we control the uncontrollable? Most people are going to say no, we can't, and they're right at that. But I want to give you the breakdown of what is controllable and what's not. What is in your power and what is not, but also the behaviors that you can take as of today to better your life. Facing the uncontrollable sounds good. So that's going to be today's plan. So let me give you the breakdown. You know that things that are uncontrollable are external events such as the weather, that the traffic, the future, things that are natural disasters, for example, and other people's behaviors, the way they think and the way they talk and the way they act.

But I have something to say about that. As far as external behaviors, we are spoiled in today's generation, in these last probably century. Now we can't complain about traffic because our phones have GPS. Yep. So therefore you're going to get the best route that is available to you. We can't really control the weather, but we also cannot complain about the weather interfering with the activities we want to do outside because we have The Weather Network. Wherever you are in the world, you must have a weather channel of the sort.

And natural disasters. I get it, we can't do anything about that. But what we can do is in the choice of where we live. Example, people that are living in California are expecting some of the natural disasters that are happening there, maybe not the wildfires, but the earthquakes for sure. So it goes to say that things are uncontrollable, but at the same time we have a little bit of control. That's what I think now as I am talking to you guys. I had written in my notes that we can't control external events also as the past.

I also have something to say about that guys. Many of us had turbulent childhood and due to unforeseen circumstances of things that are out of our control, a lot of us having had the past we have because of the actions of our parents. So we can't control what is done. We cannot. However, what we can control is how we deal with the future.

Before, when I said we can't control the future, think of it as card readers. We, we, we don't have control over that. What we do have control is over the actions regarding our past and our future, regarding the choices that we make that make us have a better life, have a better future. Enjoy our GPS, enjoy living where you're living. Those are, you see, it's like a 2 sided blaze. There's always a pro and a con to everything. Those of you who know me, you've been listening to me for over 200 episodes.

You know that I'm more of a glass half full kind of girl. Not to say that I'm oblivious to what's going on in the world, not at all. Quite the opposite. I am very much aware of what's going on, but I'm also very much aware of what I want to do in my world, around me. Not the world at the other end of the earth, My world as in my surroundings, my environment. Maybe people in people abroad, in other countries don't feel safe, right?

But I have the choice to feel safe in my own home. I have the choice to not be living with or going out with or hanging out with someone that doesn't have the same beliefs or values or that they simply just I outgrew them. I have that choice. It doesn't mean that other people are not good, but it means that I choose me when we choose for ourselves. And even if you're in a couple and you guys are discussing where you're going to go live and where you're going to send the kids to school and whatnot, well, these are things that are OK to bring about that are OK and safe to talk to your partner about because it implicates you.

It implicates your well-being, physical, emotional and mental well-being. You are your best advocate. Nobody else in the world can tell you what to do. You have the final word. So you're, you're a big person. You aren't going to deal. I always talk about the stroke being like a tornado, being that it happened, it was uncontrollable because unfortunately, unfortunately, you were the eye of the tornado. You suffered the biggest impact, the biggest boom, because everything piled up around you, right? So not only are you mentally, physically, emotionally impaired, but the world around you is twirling and it got deshuffled.

Well, now it's time to put it back in its place. I got chills, guys. This is my favorite part of the podcast. I love sharing my views with you guys before, but damn it, I love to take action. I just said that we're going to put things back into place. The hurricane, then the tornado is done. You survived, you are here, What are you going to do now?

Ha ha, We are going to figure this out together, guys. When I say put back things at its place, it also means that along the way along doing that, you can declutter. Yep, you're going to declutter your mind, your heart, your space, things around you that no longer serve their purpose, people around you that maybe you've outgrown or they're no longer have a part in your life. And it's OK.

It doesn't mean anybody's bad. It means that you've evolved maybe habits. Maybe you've been doing a few habits that you're not proud of. I'm not talking about drugs and alcohol. I'm just talking about maybe the way you view things, the way you think. Maybe you've been a little bit too pessimistic and now you said enough. I'm gonna start changing 1% every day. Change my views, change my habits, change my way of thinking and the benefit of all these guys, that's what I love. The benefit is that you, my dear, are taking control of the uncontrollable.

You are taking your power back. You are not being a victim anymore. You are saying, no way, Jose, I am taking the bull by the horn and I am leading it the way I want to lead. And you know that I'm always saying when you're leading the way, you're paving the way for obviously leading the example for other people to do such as you. So when you show up in your best self and your empowered self, you become unstoppable.

You might be slower because of the stroke. You might have an affected side. You might be wearing braces. I was wearing my brace this morning. I curse every time I wear it because it slows me down and I like things to go fast. But the reality is that because I'm wearing a brace, things have to be slower.

It doesn't mean that they come to a halt. Doesn't mean that they're stopped. You see, this is what I want you guys to understand. Not because you had a stroke. Not because you're impacted or impaired in any way, shape or form. Cognitively, physically, Everything. Everything. All aspects doesn't mean you are dead. If God wanted you dead, you would have been. No, no, no, no, no.

If you're here, there's a reason. And we're gonna find that reason together. I know that you will, and I want you to be excited about that. So focus on what is controllable, What is you can control the way you feel. You can reduce your stress and your anxiety. How? By worrying about things, you have control.

Are you going to worry because it's raining outside? Are you going to worry because there was a natural disaster in your neighborhood? You're going to definitely be hurt, upset, distraught. But you're also going to focus on maybe thinking of the positive, choosing wisely your thoughts and your words and your behaviors.

Because if you don't, if you reminisce, if you're ruminating in your mind and you remain depressed, pessimistic, glass half empty. I don't know about you, man, but it's exhausting even for me just to tell you this. It's exhausting. When we think of something negative and it's not productive. I say #2 why not increase your chances of success, your chances of doing something right? How?

When you focus on the good, when you focus on things you can control, you feel empowered. Why? Well, because you did it when we first tie our shoes after having had a stroke and we find a way. I don't know what way we but we find it. I would say shit, I did it. That is empowering. That is away you you don't want your spouse to cut your meat because you're not a child.

You're a grown ass adult, right. So you find a way to cut your own meat in your plate and you did it. Think of when I say, when I'm telling you this, all I see is my 6 year old daughter at the time pulling my arm. Come on me. Come see I clean my room. Oh my God, guys, OK. She did the very best that she could. She's six years old.

She was so proud, so happy and proud. Look, mommy, that's the thought that just creeped into my head. How encouraged she was. So was I going to crush her momentary dream of that good feeling of hers? No. Nobody in their right mind would. Would you do that to your child? So then why are you doing it to yourself?

No more. That's one of those bad habits you're going to get rid of starting today. No more. That's it. Bye. And when you make positive changes, think of if you want to lose weight and you have not been drinking water and you've kind of been eating a lot of sugar, but now your habits have changed and you're drinking water, therefore you're peeing more often.

There the water becomes a diuretic, makes you pee, it makes you, it really liquefies everything, including the fats inside. And wow, you lost 5 lbs in a week just by peeing and by not eating sugar. Are you not gonna be super excited that you're fitting in your jeans or in your shorts? I'm sure you will.

Those little changes that you've done, they were painful. Probably cutting the sugar is very painful. I know I'm in I'm, I'm in it right now and I know that it's really hard, but by keeping your eye on the ball, making good choices, declutter as you go, your mental well-being is going to be great. Why?

Because you're going to feel focused, empowered, ready for change, and you're going to be accepting of what is and what will be. As in, it's going to be better. So what's to remember guys, is that not everything is controllable. What is controllable though, are the choices that you make, your thoughts, your action, your responses. Every action causes a reaction.

The way you respond is up to you. Except also that other people, they don't see things as you. I know that I still have arguments sometime or heated discussions or passion. The discussion, call it whatever you want with people that I know because we don't share the same views. And it's OK too. I don't try to convert people, but I do put my point out there and I applaud you if you are. If you're being assertive, go for it. You got my blessing.

That being said, guys, I love you immensely. I hope you enjoyed today's show. Make sure that you leave me a comment. Spotify has this amazing thing. Now you can leave me a comment and I will get notified right away. And you can also do me the honor of sharing the podcast, share it with Sugar Bear, share it with the world out there. That way the algorithm knows that we are here. The movement of us is not going anywhere. I love you immensely.

All my stroke survivors and good luck. Keep moving forward and I'll see you next time. And changed. And you're gonna be also accepting of what what was and what is and what will be. As in changes, right? That's pretty exciting in itself.

S9E9: Can you control the uncontrollable?

Kapitelklicken springt direkt hin

Shownotes

Transkriptvom Podcast bereitgestellt · Zeitmarken springen hin