Why Your Child Saves Their Worst Behaviour For Home

0:00 When you leave with fun, they can't help but follow. They're drawn to that. My five-year-old just started kindergarten and apparently does it very well at school, but when she comes home, she turns into a bit of emotional terror. It's okay to be in a mood, but don't take it out on other people. He started Mondessuri a couple of weeks ago, and ever since he's been extremely cranky and clingy at home.

0:18 The calmer you are, the quicker they tend to calm down. Welcome to the Bratbusters Parenting podcast. My name's Lisa Bunnage. I'm a parenting coach. I'm a mom. I'm also a grandmother.

0:26 And I'm Amy Bunnage, Lisa's daughter, and I handle the marketing and planning here at Bratbusters. While I don't have kids, each episode we'll dive into parenting topics and Lisa will answer your questions. Let's get started.

0:38 Okay, sweetie, what are we talking about today?

0:41 Today's topic is why your child saves their worst behavior for home. Okay, good one. Why do they do this?

0:47 Well, because they're most relaxed. Now, I have a problem with worse behavior. It's okay to be a bit moody and just say, look, I just need some space or something. That's different. But it doesn't mean that they can come home, be in a bad mood, and start hitting you and hitting their siblings, okay? There's a line.

1:00 Like, what is their worst behavior? Is it hitting other people, abusing people, calling you names? That's never acceptable. Okay. But if they just say something like that, like I used to tell my kids, look, if you're ever in a bad mood, just go in your room and read a book or something. There's nothing wrong with being in a bad mood, but don't take it out on us.

1:15 So they learn from, and they were really good at telling me things. So we'd talk everything through. But yeah, there's it's like, what is worse behavior? And they are gonna have it with you because they're most relaxed with you, because you're the parents, right? They're the most themselves and they can say what they're thinking usually.

1:28 So, you know, express themselves. But yeah, what is their worst behavior? That's the problem here. There's no excuse to abuse other people like hitting them and name-calling and stuff like that. So yeah, but they can just say, look, I'm just in a mood. I'm just gonna go in my room. They can take themselves away.

1:43 What if you see that your child is having tantrums at home, but never when they're out?

1:47 Well, tantrums at okay, tantrums at home mean they must work. Okay, because they only tend to do past the age of about three, three and a half. They only do what works. So if they're only having tantrums at home, it means you must be feeding it somehow. You must be giving it attention or giving in to them.

2:01 Most teachers and that, they won't put up with that. So that's why they don't have them with teachers. It's very rare. Sometimes they will when they're really little, but usually no, because they know the teacher isn't gonna put up with it, right?

2:11 Now I feel like a lot of parents, what I see online is they have this scenario where their child is maybe being on their quote unquote best behavior all day at school, and then they come home and maybe they're a little moody, maybe the tantrums are happening, maybe they're fighting with their sibling.

2:25 Do you see that come up?

2:27 Yeah, I kind of already touched on that. It's okay to be in a mood, but don't take it out on other people. Like if that's the case, say, look, there's no excuse for hitting your siblings or bullying every, you know, being rotten to your sister or your brother. There's no excuse for that. So I would just say, look, um, if you're just in a bad mood, that's okay, but just go in your room, take yourself away.

2:45 Go in your room, read a book, or you can tell me about it. But yeah, there's no excuse to really take it out on others. I I totally disagree with that. I know I actually um knew someone years and years ago. Uh, they wouldn't recognize themselves here if they're listening, but they said to me, you know the best part about meing being married?

3:02 It was a woman who said this. She goes, I've got someone to kick around. I thought, wow, wow, what an attitude, eh? Interesting. I got someone to kick around. She didn't mean it physically, she meant verbally and emotionally. But I thought, wow. She goes, Yeah, because I can totally be myself. I thought, I don't want to kick anyone around, like, yuck.

3:21 So it's sort of like that. Just because you're in a bad mood, there's no excuse to abuse other people. So I raised my kids. There's just certain behavior that's not acceptable, no matter what you're feeling or what you're going through.

3:32 But I think you did allow us to not feel rainbows and sunshines 24-7, because it's just not realistic.

3:37 No, plus you told me everything. So I was a safe place to land. We talked everything through. So they would unload on me for sure, usually in the car right on the way home, or once we got home, I could always tell if something was bugging them. Once we got home, I wouldn't drill them about it, but I could, I was always there.

3:51 So like I'd just be around and I'd just look at them and they knew. They knew I knew something was wrong. And then they'd often come over and talk to me about it.

3:57 It was like mom's cleaning just happened really close to us all afternoon. Yeah, me and my mop.

4:03 They told me and my mop a lot.

4:05 The mop of secrets.

4:06 I just made sure I was nearby and they knew they knew what I was doing.

4:09 I think that there is that element of that of just being nearby. And sometimes I remember growing up is if I was having a hard day at school, I didn't always want to talk about it right away.

4:18 You were like that. Your brother did, uh, and I'm like, I want to talk about everything right away. You need to process before you talk about stuff. You're still like that. If she's going through something, I always know it. Um, but I know I'm not gonna probably not gonna hear about it till the next day.

4:32 It's just she needs to process it before she talks about it. You've always been like that.

4:36unknown Yeah.

4:36 Okay, should we get into the parenting questions? Sounds good. First one here is do you have any suggestions for dealing with after school meltdowns? My five-year-old just started kindergarten and apparently doesn't very well at school, but when she comes home, she turns into a bit of emotional terror.

4:49 I've read this can be common, especially with kids who have sensory processing sensitivities, in that they can hold themselves together while at school, but the overwhelm comes out after school. My girl in particular has sound sensitivity and wears headphones at school. When she comes home, she gets in trouble pushing her brother and shouting no when asked to do things.

5:06 Prior to this new school transition, she was 90% well behaved at home. So I think been doing really well with my leadership parenting up until this point.

5:14 Okay, there's a couple things going on there, and I really can't talk about the sensory issues because I'm not qualified to do so. But think about it. If you've had these headphones on all day and you take them off, that's a lot of overload sensory stuff going on right after school, right? I would have a transition exercise or a transition um habit or ritual that I would go through.

5:32 I'd say, okay, after school, what we're gonna do is you're gonna go in your room and I've got a nice new book for you to listen to or to to read or whatever. So I don't know how old she is. Sounds like she just started school, so she might five. Okay. So yeah, if she's not reading it, you just say, look, I've got a really nice book you can listen to, something quiet.

5:47 So yeah, have a transition habit, ritual, um, exercise that gets her more into the mode of being at home. Don't just expect her to fit right in because if she's had those headphones on all day, all of a sudden she's doesn't have them on. That's overload right there, I would assume. You know, like I said, I'm not qualified to discuss this in any real way.

6:04 But yeah, I've I've worked with kids like this. And yeah, that's a lot of overload right away.

6:08 And then what are your thoughts on the 90% well-behaved at home?

6:11 She was. She said that, yeah. So yeah, you just haven't got a ritual to transfer her into this, into the home environment yet. Find a way to get her brain processed that, okay, this is a new place now, we're back home, and you've got to have a ritual to do that. It's like a lot of people do that with we have bedtime rituals, we have morning rituals.

6:29 It's it's a transition thing. It gets our mind or and our body and or our body ready for something new. Now she's back home. That's something new for the day, right? And she goes to school, that's something new for the morning. So yeah, there's the transition habits and exercises that prepare them for it.

6:45 You just haven't found one that works yet at home, but you gotta figure something out there.

6:48 Okay, the next one's five-year-old daughter has developed issues with transitioning into kindy for the morning. She's been attending the same lovely kindergarten for years, but the last four weeks has struggled to go independently. Instead of running to the door, crying, and now we have to physically manhandle her to stay.

7:03 At the same time, she stopped dancing ballet at her weekly class and will shrink in the corner with her hands at her mouth. No amount of lures, bribing, talking, routines, etc., dissuades the behavior, it seems. We've asked her what she's afraid of and get no real answer. At the end of the day, we pick her up and she's happy and doesn't want to leave.

7:20 She has good connections with her friends. Educators says she's fine within 15 minutes and gets on with her day and is an active, happy participant in all daily activities. Concerned is she's starting school next year and worried about the drop-offs. Otherwise, she's clever and lovely child, but has always had a perfectionist streak and a bit of anxiety.

7:38 Is this just a developmental phase or should we be looking into it further? Please help.

7:42 Uh, perfectionism is never really what the issue is. It's the fear of messing up. It's it's quite different from perfectionism. So I won't get into that here. But sounds to me like it was going okay before and now it's not, and you're wondering why. Now she won't go to ballet, etc. Maybe it's the way you're dropping her off.

8:00 Are you dragging it out? I always talk about the dump and run. So you just sort of dump them off really quickly. And it's not, you're not dumping them, but you get the idea. You drop them off really quickly. You say bye, have a good day, see you later. See that upbeat tone in my voice, and then leave.

8:13 Make it fast. The faster the goodbye, usually the quicker they recover. I'm assuming that's it. Um, so yeah, just maybe you're dragging out the goodbye too long. Maybe that's it. She's sensing you're stressed out over it.

8:24 Okay, the next one is Fatima from the United States. Son's two years and four months old. He started Montessori a couple of weeks ago, and ever since he's been extremely cranky and clingy at home. He only wants mama for everything. He doesn't want to do most things he's used to for fun, like bath time, for example.

8:39 I was the sole person taking care of him until now. We don't have any family or friends who could watch him. He's always had tantrums and I've been following your approach to deal with them, which has been working, but since starting school, it's like everything's a lot worse. I'm wondering if I should still deal with him the same way, or should I cut him some slack because of the big transition?

8:56 I don't quite know about by the way, we were discussing your name. Um, I've had clients with that name, and usually it's pronounced uh Fat Fatma. Um, I think I'm probably saying that wrong, but we just want to apologize if we've messed up your name. Okay, sorry about that. Um, and I I'm really lucky because in my coaching I just call everyone mom and dad.

9:14 So I can't pronounce their name. So anyway, two-year-old boy, just keep doing what you're doing. Just the calmer you are, the quicker they tend to calm down. So it transitions can be really difficult for little ones, okay? They don't always like that, and but they get used to it really quick. Usually after you've left, they're fine.

9:29 So it really was a transition thing, wasn't it? The question.

9:33 That's how it's sounding, but I think the idea of cutting slack because of the big transition.

9:37 Yeah, but I don't know what you mean by cutting slack. Well, how are you gonna do that? I don't understand that. Where where are you cutting the slack? What slack are you talking about? That's still um, so yeah, I was a little bit confused by that question. Uh cutting the slack.

9:50 I think I can see where it's parents coming from because some parents may feel like approaching tantrums with your approach, maybe they want to like talk to them or they want to Oh, okay, I see.

9:59 Yeah, no, it's not gonna work. Um, so yeah, I see what you mean now. Okay, when you say cutting slack, you mean dragging it out more? That's making it worse for them. So yeah, you just want to make everything quick, like it's no big deal. It's no big deal. See you later, have fun, or you'll be all right.

10:14 That kind of talk, that attitude, just getting it out quickly and not dragging it out, that is cutting them slack because that's what works the best. If they think, if you start dragging it out, they think, wow, I really should be upset. Wow, this really is traumatic. It's almost like you're talking them into getting upset.

10:30 So yeah, if you treat it like it's no big deal. It's like it just reminds me of my mom and dad. They were completely different. They were both very loving parents. I was lucky. My dad was more the pleaser. And if I was upset about something, he'd, oh, sweetie pie, are you okay? And then I'd get worse and worse and worse.

10:43 It was like he was feeding this. My mom would come in the room and she'd go, She's all right, you'll survive. And I was fine after that because it was already something that was worked out. But it was her tone, her attitude was, it's no big deal, you'll survive. And I did, I was fine. So my dad sort of made me worse by being extra compassionate and talking about everything.

11:01 And then I thought, wow, I I should be upset. Whereas mom would just, mom made everything look like it was no big deal. We'll work it out. And then when she'd talk to me about it, we'd figure it out. But yeah, it's your attitude. Don't feel sorry for them just because they're going through a difficult transition.

11:14 It's part of life. Just realize that the quicker you if you look upset and if you start dragging it out, it makes them think, wow, I really should be upset. It makes it worse. In what areas would you cut them some slack? If they're sick, for sure. If they're sick or injured or something awful happened, then yeah, there's a lot more cuddling and coddling for sure.

11:33unknown Yep.

11:34 Uh no rules if they're sick. If my kids were sick, I slept in bed with them. I served them whatever they wanted. Yeah, I was all over them. Remember, you said you almost hated it when you got well?

11:43 I know. I feel like I just got waited on all day. And you did. I loved it.

11:49 I mean, I didn't love when they were sick, but I love fussing over them. I remember my son, he doesn't like to be fussed over. And even when he was little, he didn't like it. When he got sick, I was all even as a teenager. Mom, could you, Mom? I really would love some toast with honey on it. Oh, I was so excited.

12:03 I'd be skipping all the way to the kitchen just to be able to fuss over them.

12:06 Even now you're like, oh, I can bring down the vaporizer, I can do this, or I get a little cold. Do you want some VIX? I'll rub it on your chest.

12:14 My son would say, Mom, I'm 36 years old, back off. Yeah, I love, I love mothering and all that stuff. But yeah, when they're sick for sure, rules go out the window.

12:22 Okay, the next ones, I have twin five-year-old boys. One has a lot of issues last year in pre-primary. He's always struggled a bit with transitions and had some aggressive behaviors at time and had difficulty regulating his emotions. I used your methods and now there's no aggressive behavior aside from the occasional moment.

12:37 This year we're one week in degrade primary and he's struggling again with the transitions. The learning center teacher is helping him and has said he stands off to the side in gym and doesn't always participate. She also said he struggled at first going to the cafeteria and following instructions while there.

12:52 He went to the learning center and told her it was loud. I'm just wondering if it's appropriate to give a consequence for not listening to the teachers, or what should I do to help the situation? I'm not sure if this warrants a consequence or if there's another way to address this.

13:04 It is appropriate to uh put something like this um follow the rules at school. Because that's important. It's gonna be safety issues, right? So you can literally put on a behavior board that's free on my website, Bratbusters.com, follow school rules. And if he doesn't, when he gets home, he gets a consequence.

13:21 Now none of this is a huge deal. Don't use that tone. I understand you were naughty at school. That patronizing tone, just say, okay, teacher, let me know you had a bad day at school. You weren't following the rules. Here's your consequence. See how I'm talking? You leave emotions out of discipline. It's it's a business transaction.

13:36 So yeah, he'll eventually learn. That's okay. That I mean, it's okay that he's taking a while to transition into a new school or a new grade or a new teacher, whatever it is. It's quite normal. But oftentimes when they pull themselves out and they sit off to the side, they do it for attention. That now, I'm not saying that's what's happening here, but if they fuss over him too much, he'll continue to do it sometimes, but they know what they're doing, by the way.

13:58 But oftentimes, if they look like they're missing out on a lot of fun, they're more likely to join in. So it's not so much focusing on them, it's focusing on the fun they're missing out on. So yeah, that that can usually help. But I'm sure the teachers know what they're doing.

14:10 So I wanted to choose this question because it's almost the opposite of what we were talking about in the beginning, where it's sounding like she's dealing with a lot of the behaviors at home, but then at school they're acting out. So this is almost the flip. What do you find that that tends to be?

14:32 The reason is, and it's almost always the same reason, is you cater to him at home and they don't. They've got how many students at a school? They they don't cater to each individual child. That's almost always the reason why they're good at home and not at school. Almost always the reason. Because everything's going his way at home.

14:49 You cater to him. He's more entitled at home. He gets his own way at home. I'm assuming that you're overcompensating for his behavior and his sensitivities. And then school doesn't do that because he's got to fit in, right?

15:01 Are there other reasons?

15:02 Um, well, depends on your parenting, you know. Um, if you're like if you're spoiling him too much and they don't spoil him, um, there could be something going on at school that he doesn't like. Uh don't worry, it might not be anything huge. Maybe he's being bullied, but he's young. Teachers usually pick up on what's going on.

15:19 It's unusual at that age that they don't because kids aren't that bright if they are bullying other kids. It's usually pretty out in the open and the pen and the adults pick it up. So yeah, something could be going on at school, could be potentially. Um, but it sounds like you the teachers have already talked to you about it and they've already worked through that.

15:35 But I would ask them, I would say, look, you know, I'm concerned is maybe he's being bullied or left out, or you know, uh you could look into that.

15:42 There was a little bit extra and it mentioned that it's the first time since being split up from the twin.

15:48 Okay, well, maybe the other twin is more the leader. Um, even though they may not have seemed to be, maybe the maybe they're more the one that they they oftentimes with twins, one pulls strength from the other and one's more independent. Maybe he's the one that pulls the strength from the twin. Without the twin there, he's got to stand on his own two feet.

16:05 That could be it too. Yeah. It could be a whole bunch of different reasons.

16:08 Okay, the next one is Claire from the United Kingdom. Have a two-year-old and four-year-old boys on the behavior board. You mentioned just starting with two or three rules or the behaviors at the beginning. My question is, what do you do about other challenging behaviors in the meantime? So for example, building listening skills.

16:25 Two-year-old is sticking with the corrective action, four-year-old has started getting really emotional and tired since starting school. Keeps her for refusing to sit at the table. But if it was the please sit at the table or I will help you sit at the table by getting by coming to get you, he's getting himself into a right state and ends up in a complete meltdown, screaming, he's angry, and I've made him upset.

16:44 I try to remain on the high road and ignore the screaming when he's like this, no matter the situation. It's so loud, I can't actually talk to him to say what the consequences are for his choice, to then leave him to make a choice. Any advice, please?

16:56 Okay, well, that was an outward threat. You sit at the table or I'll make you sit at the table. That's a threat. I don't do that. It brings out the worst in people, it brings up their defensiveness and they don't want to do what you want. So don't talk like that. Just say time for dinner. And uh anyway, look up mealtime routines.

17:10 You Google Bratbuster's meal time, and there'll be a whole bunch of ideas on how you handle mealtime. Okay, but you said that you've got a two and a four-year-old on the behavior board. It doesn't start till the age of three. So the two-year-old is different. But if you get my free behavior board, it also has a toddler section for the two-year-old.

17:25 How you discipline a toddler is not on the behavior board. And then you said two to three rules. So there's only one rule on a behavior board. And then the second week you have another behavior board with another rule. So you've got two rules, but two separate behavior boards a week apart, and then you'll have a third one.

17:39 You only go to three. Then you also said listening skills. They don't listen to someone they don't respect. You've got to set yourself up as a leader and then they will listen. Uh, it sounds to me like you're trying to fix your kids. We don't do that. We fix and teach parents here. I'm gonna teach you how to be a leader and then they will listen to you.

17:55 It's like it's like expecting them to respect you, but you haven't earned it yet. You gotta earn that listening, okay? It doesn't just happen. It's nothing to do with them. All children listen to a leader. It's a natural instinct. They they are drawn to a leader and they listen to leaders. So all we're doing here is working on your leadership skills.

18:10 Start with the free behavior board. If you want more, go to the course. If you want even more, that's coaching. But anyway, it's all about you. I teach parenting, not kidding. So yeah, you just gotta start from scratch. Everything you've said just says to me, you gotta start from scratch. Free behavior board is the training wheels with all this, and it's completely free.

18:26 Okay. That's why we call it the free behavior board. Anyway.

18:29 Uh you just need to join the newsletter to get access to it.

18:32 Yeah, it's at the very top of the website, bratbusters.com. It's the very first thing you'll see at the very top.

18:37 Okay, one final question is Sophie from the United States. Two-year-old throws a fit, so whining, physical resistance, when it's time to go downstairs to get changed for school. I don't negotiate. I tell him we're going downstairs and it needs to happen. Do I just carry him down kicking and whining? He's also flipping around during the changing.

18:52 How do I best handle these situations when he protests to things that actually need to happen?

18:56 Um, you can just follow it up with action, but sounds like you get a bit stern. I would say, okay, time to get dressed. And then he says no and tries to run away. I'm I'm carrying him down, kicking and screaming. And then I just get him dressed, but I look away like I might hum to myself. The more bored and relaxed you look, the more effective it is.

19:12 Okay. So it he's just feeding off your energy, basically. He's they they start out testing you, and then if it upsets you, then they keep going. But that they fail, you fail the test. In other words, they back off if you don't get upset, okay? But he's only two. They're gonna keep doing this for a while.

19:27 They're not gonna learn overnight. So yeah, you just say, okay, time to get dressed. See my tone though? And then I just pick him up, kicking and screaming. I don't say anything. Like once once he's said no and once he's, you know, defiant and retaliating, I don't talk. I just take him downstairs and then I might look hum to myself, look outside, but I'm getting him dressed.

19:45 I don't care if he's got a sock on a hand and his pants on his head. I'm getting those clothes on him. But I'm just calm as anything. Move slow, don't move fast. Give yourself lots of time to do this because it's gonna take a while. It's gotta be done though. Take action.

19:57 We were chatting about this the other day, and I would love for you to clarify because oftentimes you talk about taking action and all of that stuff, but before the bad behavior or before the refusal, how are you approaching these kind of day-to-day activities when maybe you know there might be a little pushback?

20:11 Well, um, do you remember what I used to do with you or what I've talked about doing with you? You led with fun, and I want you to talk about that. Always lead with fun. I used to say, Oh, we're gonna be going to school. So as soon as I use the as soon as method, we're gonna go to school. What are you gonna be doing it there?

20:25 Oh, we're gonna go out. We might go to go to a park, whatever you're gonna be doing that they like, I start talking about that. I don't talk about getting dressed. I don't talk about stuff that's mundane that he doesn't care about. I'm talking about where we're going. Okay, so we're gonna go there. So let's go get our clothes on, then we can go.

20:39 You see how I'm and uh that's the tone I use whenever I'm talking to kids. If I want them to do something, I I lead with fun. Can you put on your shoes faster than me? Sometimes I'll do that. I'll say, oh, look how fast I'm at getting my shoes on. Can you get your shoes on? And also I like to mess up with kids too, because I'll often put my shoes on the wrong feet and I'd say, Oh, I got my shoes on first, but wait a minute, did I put my shoes on the wrong feet?

21:02 They love it when you mess up. When you're a source of fun, leadership is about fun, right? It's about connection. It's the discipline's a tiny part of all this. When you lead with fun, you're in their world. It's always in their world, by the way, all the fun, all the playing, all the discipline, everything's in their world.

21:16 When you lead with fun, they can't help but follow. They're drawn to that. Fun is their love language, okay? When you're the source of that, they tend to, they tend to want to please you. They tend to follow you.

21:26 It's just the way it is. I wanted you to touch on that because I think that oftentimes you're talking about these situations once the child's already refused, but there's a lot that goes into it before.

21:35 Well, that's all I ever did. Um, I didn't have to deal with a lot of bad behavior because I always led with fun. So I'll tell you what, we're gonna go. You know what we're gonna do? We're gonna go out to the park. I'll tell you what, let's get this stuff cleaned up and then out we go. I always talk like that to kids.

21:50 They just end up cleaning up all their toys without even thinking about it. If I focused on the chore I wanted them to do, chances are they're gonna kick back a little, right? Whereas if if I always start with the fun, doesn't mean they're always gonna do it, okay? But you got a much more likely chance of them doing what you want if you lead with fun.

22:06 And you know that tone of voice I just used? Always use that with little kids. I know what we're gonna do. Oh, wait till you see what we're gonna do. Let's get this cleaned up and then we'll go find out. Even I'm listening and I'm like, even I was listening to myself. I thought, what have I got planned?

22:21 Like it's enticing. It's funny when I talk like that to clients and they're, you know, in the video calls with coaching and they're looking at me like, what? What are we gonna do? What? My mom had that same tone. What have I got here up in this cupboard? Oh, let me see. And I was like, what you got? What you got?

22:36 What you got? See, it brings out the best. It's fun. It's like a sense of wonder. Sense of wonder. I was always doing that. Sense of magic, a sense of wonder. I had a whole bunch of weird stuff going on with kids, but I lead with fun, always. And it's very rare that they will kick back against me because I lead with fun.

22:50 But if they do, I know how to deal with it.

22:52 I remember even as a gymnastics coach, I used to do that. And it just it, I mean, I had the advantage of there was a lot of fun things for them to do, but it just it always got them more on board. Yeah. Tone of voice. So cute. Though I used to call them a silly goose if they were just, you know, being a little silly.

23:06 And this one little boy, he would have been like two and a half or three. And he goes, I am not a goose. Oh I'm like, no, I know. Okay, got it. Don't tell your parents I called you a goose. Um okay. Well, that was it for the parenting questions.

23:18 Okay, listen, leadership is everything. We're not fixing kids here. We're fixing and teaching parents. The only reason that you're not getting respect is because you haven't learned how to be a leader yet. That's what we're all about. My goal and my business, this is my legacy. I have been doing this for many, many years.

23:31 I started volunteering with kids when I was 11. This is my passion. I love kids. I love bringing out the best in them. I just absolutely love it. And it's quite easy to do when you know how. My goal is not that you raise nice kids. That's a byproduct of all this. My goal with you is always the same thing.

23:47 I want you to have as much fun raising your kids as I did raising mine. Parenting was the most fun I ever had. I loved it. I want you to wallow in it like I did. That's my goal. I want you to have a happy family. I think that's a great place to end. Okay, back again soon, talking about another parenting topic.

24:02 Happy parenting.

24:04 Thanks for tuning in. If you're ready to dive deeper, check out Bratbusters.com to learn more about the behavior board, parenting courses, and private 101 coaching with Lisa. If you've enjoyed the show so far, we'd love it if you could take a moment to follow, rate, and review us on your favorite podcast platform.

24:20 Your feedback helps us reach more parents just like you. The information provided in this podcast is for general informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional advice. Lisa is a parenting coach, mom, and grandmother. She is not a licensed psychologist or counselor. Her services do not replace the care of psychologists or other healthcare professionals.

24:41 For a full disclaimer, please visit Bratbusters.com forward slash disclaimer.