My roommate invited a STRANGER in while I was asleep... I wasn't even wearing pants! -r/amiwrong | Reddit Stories | EP3122

0:00 Hey, this is Angie.

0:01 And this is Carly, your favorite OK Storytime hosts, and we've got some great stories coming up.

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0:12 My roommate invited a stranger in while I was asleep.

0:16 I wasn't even wearing pants!

0:19 We've known each other for years, and prior to agreeing to be roommates, we talked about a few ground rules. She said that she did not plan on bringing guys over because she's not that type of person. This was great, because we share a traditional dorm room. For those who don't know, that means you share a room with one other person with maybe three feet between the beds, yeah.

0:38 She knows I have a very early class, which is essential to my major. On Tuesday afternoon, we discussed rules about bringing gentleman callers, if you know what I mean. I said I had no problem with her having guys over as long as she let me know beforehand, so I wasn't there. On Tuesday night, she woke me up at 1am bringing a guy in. I sleep without pants and she knows this. So imagine my surprise when I'm woken up by a guy just standing at the foot of my bed. They left and came back again around 2.30 and this time he stayed. He kept me up the whole night laughing and talking. I would have told him to leave, but he was much bigger and stronger than I am. He's a football player and I'm short, chubby,

1:18 and not very athletic.

1:20 So you can still take him on. You can still just tell him, hey.

1:23 Yeah, you think he's going to like attack you?

1:25 Dude, all you got to do is drive the nuts and you're fine.

1:27 He's a football player. I didn't want to tell him to leave.

1:30 Or just be like, I'm calling, I don't know, security or like RAs or whatever.

1:35 He didn't leave until after four in the morning. I was pissed, needless to say. By the way, this comes from backgroundfriend06, and if you want to submit your own stories, go to the r slash OKStoryTime subreddit.

1:47 I'm Savannah.

1:48 I'm Riley.

1:49 I'm Keon.

1:50 And we are here to talk about some stuff, give some advice, and we don't have all your answers. We're only going to tell you what we would do. But let us know what you would do down in the comments. As Opie says.

2:02 I talked to my roommate about it and she apologized because he was loud, not because she invited him without informing me. Our housing policy states that overnight guests have to be agreed on by all roommates.

2:13 And the other people are supposed to be given at least 24 hours notice.

2:17 Not that I needed that much notice. It would have just been nice to know beforehand. On Thursday, she woke me up again before my class started. coming in from partying being very loud. This has really started to affect my energy going into my day and makes paying attention in class difficult because I'm tired. On my way back to campus Sunday, she said she's bringing someone else over and I tell her we need to talk about her guest policy. When I'm back in the dorm, a large group of us were in the common area and someone brings up whether a person should leave in the event their roommate brings an overnight guest. I say their roommate shouldn't have to leave the bed they paid for, and they keep grilling me about it, why I'm so against it.

2:55 I then tell them about what happened Tuesday night, and everyone loses their mind. They say I'm an awful person for airing out my roommate. However, I didn't go into detail about what I saw out of respect for her. My roommate then blows up on me, saying she's going to continue to have guys over the whole night, that I'm not being a real one, and that she would do the same for me. To clarify, I'm not a prude.

3:18 I just had issues with the lack of communication and how abruptly everything happened. On top of feeling uncomfortable in my own room, I am not comfortable sleeping in the same room as some random man she had only met that night.

3:30 Go back to their place, honestly.

3:31 Yeah, I need a good handshake, know that he's okay. That's all I need.

3:36 Time to be gross, OP. You just either tell her, I'm going to tell the RA, or I'm going to be just really gross.

3:42 After a while, more people came in, and similar to the game telephone, the story became more and more convoluted. I clarified any misgivings and told everyone calling her names to knock it off. After everything was said and done, I went back to my room. My room was very close to the common area, so I could hear everything.

4:01 My roommate started to speak poorly of me as soon as I left, saying I had no friends and no one liked me. The group then started to make fun of me because I'm a virgin.

4:10 Nope.

4:11 And to the comments, I've been in a long-term relationship for two years and we think we're going to wait until marriage.

4:17 Dude, that's totally cool.

4:20 This has been going on four days and it makes it extremely difficult to even leave my room to go get food because they're always.

4:26 In the common area talking about me.

4:28 I think my roommate may have shared some of my personal information because now they laugh when I walk by. Am I wrong for calling out my roommate for keeping me up with an overnight guest?

4:39 No, you have boundaries.

4:40 You've been trying to communicate this she's not respecting him.

4:43 You guys are on the same page.

4:45 It's weird and it doesn't seem like she's trying to compromise to be on the same page either like she doesn't even want to have like the conversation or anything i don't know to.

4:52 Be fair i didn't like my roommate in college it's kind of weird There's an.

4:56 Edit to add.

4:57 I talked to my roommate about the situation on Wednesday at the gym after my class. It seemed like we were on the same page then, but clearly not, given the conversation we had on Sunday. For anyone says I'm telling her business, it's well known she has guys over.

5:11 She brags about it all the time. And there's an update.

5:14 Two days later, I had a meeting with her program director and explained the situation. And she said she understands why I want to move. However, moving at this time may not be happening. because they're still accounting for spaces actually taken versus those still available. I also emailed the professor in the discussion-based course everyone and I share, claiming that I don't feel comfortable joining a lot of the discussions because of the things people are still saying. As far as things between my roommate and I, I wouldn't say things are going well. We only talk when she's in the room, if that. She said she was upset I told her business. However, now that everything is said and done, people who were actually there that night are

5:54 acknowledging that her retelling blows the situation way out of proportion and makes it seem like I told everything that happened with her guest. I also tried to get her to see things from my perspective and reiterated that we discussed the subject several times and she went back.

6:09 On our agreement.

6:10 Ugh.

6:11 This is just giving freshmen, like, such a fresh, like, this happens, this happened to, like, so many people. Well, you gotta fight in order to get a new roommate. At this point, she's not happy.

6:19 Yeah.

6:20 But this, this happened to so many people. Thankfully, not me, but, like, a lot of my friends or people in the dorm were just like, I hate my roommate. Or, like, I can't live with my roommate. I'm like, well, why? It'd just be reasons like this or even something sillier than this. And you go, okay.

6:34 She left after that and went back to crap talking. I met with my R.A., And the things she can do are very limited due to updates in the housing policy. She said she understood exactly how I felt, but didn't want me to have to leave. My floor and wing are currently under fire with the housing department due to how late and loud their get togethers are on top of the smoking and drinking.

6:59 Oh, gotcha. Not actually lit on fire, but like they're under a lot of pressure.

7:03 She suggested a mediated meeting between my roommate and I to sign a housing contract. At this point, I'm just going to have to buy a sleep mask and couch surf on the nights she wants to have guys over. Our friendship is basically non-existent, and it feels like she envies my relationship with my boyfriend based on what she said in class today. She's always looking down on people and picking on their insecurities, making fun of their bodies, faces, skin tones, and various other things. She complained about how she's pretty enough to be messed with, but not pretty enough to be someone's girlfriend. Which is ironic because she dumped her boyfriend before coming to college because she didn't want to be tied down. Some advice I saw in

7:43 the comments was to just go out there. But every time I leave my room, they.

7:47 Start whispering or stop talking altogether.

7:50 I might have another meeting with our program director to discuss next steps. But so far, these are all the updates that come to mind. Thank you all so much. Update two, almost two weeks later. Last Tuesday, my roommate asked if she could have a guy over. many hours in advance. She said he would be at our dorm by nine and gone by 10 or 1030.

8:12 At the latest.

8:13 I agreed because it was within a reasonable timeframe and she'd asked very early. This guy was driving in from our hometown about an hour away. It's close to nine by this point and the guy still hasn't shown up. So I make small talk about him. I asked who the guy was that kept coming to see her. She responded by correcting me and saying, guys, plural. I was shocked, but let her continue. Turns out it's been a different guy every time. While I'm not judging her lifestyle, I find it odd that she's so comfortable bringing these guys she barely knows to her living space. By 1030, she came in saying he was playing basketball, but still coming.

8:52 Dude, ball is life. Yes. My man. I can't blame him.

8:58 I'd be doing that.

8:59 I would say, no, I'm sorry, but I'm going to bed now and He's not coming over. You gave me the time frame. I agreed to the time frame. It is now past that. So no, he cannot be here.

9:10 Go bounce some balls with him.

9:13 11 rolled around and the guy still hadn't shown up. At this point, I assumed he stood her up and started getting ready for bed. At around 11.20, I'm putting on my bonnet to go to bed and she says the guy is here and she's bringing him up. I tell her it's late, but before we can continue, she rushes out and says, I'm much appreciated. I go wait out in the common area close to midnight. Our guy RA sees me and asks what I'm still doing outside.

9:39 He asked if I had class the next morning. I said I did, but that I couldn't go back.

9:43 In my room.

9:43 He said it was my room too and told me to let him know if the issue continued so we could have a meeting. When 12 hit, I texted my roommate asking if the guy was leaving soon. She said to give them a minute and that minute turned into half an hour. When 12.30 came around, I told her the guy needed to leave. and I didn't end up getting back in my room till around 12.45. My boyfriend was on the phone with me through everything because he felt uncomfortable with me being outside that late. I had an 8 a.m. the following day, which I slept through because I was so exhausted.

10:14 If my roommate did this, I'm like, I don't care.

10:17 Ow.

10:17 I'm fine. I'm going to stand there and play weird animal sounds. Playing whale noises.

10:22 Nah, dude. Easiest thing, you start playing a LeBron James highlight reel, the guy will come outside. Who wouldn't watch that? He's a basketball dude. Come on.

10:31 I told my parents about the situation before I left for class. My dad ended up calling the school and talking to someone from housing. Originally, they were reluctant to even look into the issue, saying they didn't know what the RAs had done to fix it, so it was out of their control. My dad then asked how an issue of my safety was out of their control since the first incident happened without my consent or acknowledgement. After that, housing contacted me to ask for details, which I gave them.

10:57 They said they'd have the RAs talk to my roommate while they finished checking for vacancies. On Thursday, I tried to give my roommate a heads up, That housing might come talk to her, but turns out they already had. And she was upset. I understand her frustration. However, I did try to talk to her about the issue several times and at that point felt like my time was being disrespected. She started to go off on me about how I don't like the way she lives. I told her it wasn't even that. Our schedules just don't align and it's starting to affect my sleep. For me, sleeping isn't just important for school, but also for my health.

11:29 I'm slightly pre-diabetic. And I've been working hard to change my habits with eating, sleeping, and exercise to stop things from progressing. I told her all this when I was first diagnosed. So she knows, which is what makes the situation all the more frustrating.

11:45 She doesn't care.

11:45 She really doesn't.

11:47 I am going to finish this.

11:49 Halzine reached out to me that afternoon about an opening in a suite-style dorm. I accepted their offer as soon as I got it. My girl RA reached out and said my roommate was willing to mediate after she found out about the news. It felt like too little too late, so I politely declined, saying that even with mediation, the issue may persist and start to affect me on more important days, like nights before exams or big projects. My RA told me she understood and apologized for not being able to do more. I packed to move out on Friday and left to go home for the weekend. She wasted no time removing me from the group chat we had for the women in our community. We haven't talked since Friday and with the way things are going, we

12:31 probably won't. She's a completely different person than who I graduated high school with. I moved in on Sunday and my new roommates have been great. We all live pretty separate lives, so there's not really any interference. I don't know if I handled the situation correctly. If more could have been done on my end, let me know in the comments. That's all that comes to mind for now.

12:51 I don't think really no one was doing anything for you. Not that everyone was against you, but no one was really taking this issue seriously. So it's like, you know, all I wanted was like a safe place to come home.

13:03 I just think, OP, you kind of just let her get away with it. You weren't giving her consequences. You're like, I'm going to tell on you. And you told on her and there were still no consequences. I would have been like, lock the door or like, no.

13:14 Something like that.

13:15 Good on you, dude.

13:16 And if you wanted to get that guy out, just play Russell Westbrook highlights. Just start dribbling the basketball. He would have came out.

13:22 Like, oh, there's a basketball. I need to play. That's how we function.

13:25 I love it.

13:26 And that's the end of this story. We're good to go. On to the next one.

13:30 My roommate's dog bonded with me. Now they're all jealous. It's my dog now. I, 19 male, live in a five-bedroom apartment with a brother-sister pair and two other random female roommates. The two other girls are not really relevant to this situation. We all attend college together and range from freshmen to juniors. Basically, they adopted a puppy all five of us agreed and were fine with. That's a good start.

13:52 Heck yeah.

13:53 They told us they would take care of the puppy and have stayed true to that. They walk, feed, play with, and are currently obedience training it. They're the only ones who give the puppy treats and none of us feed the puppy human food. The issue is the puppy Lucy has bonded with me. I walk in the room and she runs up super excited. She does not do this for anyone else. It licks me. Also something it does not do to anyone else. Opie does not care about this dog.

14:19 Um, actually.

14:21 In the Eastern culture, they refer to pets as it rather than assigning a he or she.

14:27 I just think it's funny because she started off with saying she and then she changed to it.

14:32 Well, maybe that just is how she goes.

14:34 Maybe she's half Western, half Eastern culture.

14:37 Maybe it's hard to keep up with the, you know, pronunciation of sentences and how we go with it.

14:42 By the way, this comes from one throwaway, 098748. And if you want to submit your own stories, go to the r slash showcase story time subreddit. I'm Sophia.

14:50 I'm Riley.

14:51 I'm Keon.

14:51 And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we don't have all the answers. We only know what we do. So let us know what you would do in the comments. And Opie says, Lucy follows me around whenever I'm in the apartment, never leaving my side unless I close my room door or she's sleeping. I do play with Lucy when I'm home. Aw, Lucy likes you. She, like, likes you.

15:08 She loves you. Maybe that's why. Yeah, Opie's like, I just pet her.

15:35 I pet her, but then I don't give her the attention that she wants.

15:39 And then she gets upset because she wants it.

15:40 The attention from me.

15:42 I also don't feel like it is my fault Lucy is bonded with me. I can't control her. I know she isn't my dog. At night, she sleeps in the male owner's bed. I guess my question is, how do we resolve this? I'm more worried about calming owners down than I am about Lucy giving me attention. My other roommates have a We're staying out of this attitude. And we've got an update, folks.

16:03 What's the problem?

16:05 The dog likes OP.

16:07 Everyone's upset that Lucy, a.k.a. the dog, likes OP.

16:11 What I'm trying to say is I don't think there is a problem here.

16:14 There's no problem.

16:15 But the owner is the problem because the owner's upset that their dog likes OP more.

16:21 We don't even know if the dog likes OP more. It just seems like the dog likes OP.

16:27 And the owners are.

16:29 Update.

16:30 Let's start by saying that went horribly. My lovely roommates offered to gift me Lucy because she likes me so much.

16:36 Okay. I would take her.

16:38 Opie's 19. In college, I would not have time for a dog.

16:42 I mean, I would. Five roommates. If we had a dog here and.

16:46 Everyone was pretty chill with it, everyone was on the same page, dog would be fine. It'd be like Chip.

16:50 Chip's chill.

16:51 Okay, but now imagine you, 19, in college, doing all this work, and they say, now you have to take care of the dog. We're not going to help. I would not. You know what? I'm going to just say I, 19, would not be able to take care of a dog.

17:06 I can help out, but I do not want to own the dog.

17:10 I do not have time to own a dog or the funds to care for a dog. I told them no, and they aren't happy. Yeah, that's it. That's it. I also would have told them no.

17:21 That's wild.

17:22 Now I didn't think about the funds of it.

17:24 Yeah, that's what I was saying. You're 19 in school.

17:27 I was just thinking of the time. I would think like, oh, I need to go home to go take care of my dog.

17:33 I would totally do that. Also- No update. No update. No relevant comments. Nothing. But truly, I saw a comment that was just like, oh, my pet likes you more? Here, take my pet. Calling out the owner of the pet. So, yeah, whoever, which is like they couldn't handle it. Crazy. Wild.

17:55 Vepos are crazy, though.

17:56 And that's the end of this story. We're going to go on to the next one.

18:00 My roommate's mother demanded I follow her rules in the apartment I pay for myself.

18:07 It's my apartment!

18:08 My roommate, who I'll call Emily, and I, both 21 female, are college students, and we live in an off-campus apartment together. We split rent and utilities 50-50. I pay for my part, myself, but Emily's parents pay for hers. Emily's mom is a bit... overbearing and has a lot of rules for our apartments the main one being that no boyfriends are allowed to sleep over as it's against her religion.

18:33 Well there you go it's her religion what religion i mean a lot of religions doesn't allow sleepovers a lot of religions do like sleepover yeah a lot of religions are like not until you're married who knows what you could be doing at that sleepover She.

18:49 Specifically told Emily to have a talk with me about the subject to tell me this is not allowed after.

18:55 We moved in. That's crazy.

18:57 After you moved in?

18:59 Not how this works.

18:59 Where is it?

19:00 Where is it on the contract?

19:02 Oh, so she's saying she's saying you guys can't bring your boyfriends over here because of my religion. So she might be like she might be Muslim.

19:10 Emily can do that. I'm not following your religion.

19:13 Christian, I would think like, oh, you can't have your own boyfriend sleep over. But with like a lot of, you know, people who are devoutly. Why are you shaking your head?

19:22 I see your point of view, but I've been around some parents and they're super very overbearing. Emily doesn't care if I have my boyfriend over for the night as she does it all the time without telling her parents.

19:36 Hilarious. Amazing. Great.

19:38 However, it strikes me the wrong way that Emily's mom feels like she can impose non-negotiable rules on me when she doesn't pay for any of my part of the bills. Today, Emily's parents are coming to visit and I expect her mom to go over all the rules that she set with me. Would I be the a-hole if I told her mom that, with all due respect, I'm paying for my portion of the rent and she doesn't have any control of the things I do in my apartment? By the way, this comes from Marshmallow Marshmallow of Doom and And if you want to submit your own stories, go to the r slash OK Storytime subreddit. I'm Riley.

20:11 I'm Sophia.

20:12 I'm Riley.

20:13 And we're going to read the story goofily. If you have anything you'd like to add, please add it down below. So before we continue, Sophia, would it be out of Opie's bounds to say this to her mother?

20:22 I think you show her the lease. You go, it's funny. It doesn't say anywhere that I can't have a boyfriend over. Yeah. And then you take out your birth certificate and you go, huh, you're not my mom.

20:31 And then she goes, the contract with God.

20:33 You go, I'm not religious.

20:35 It's a contract with your God.

20:37 On one hand, I feel like I'm justified. This woman is trying to impose her own religious beliefs onto me in an apartment that I pay half.

20:45 Of the bills for.

20:45 The idea of just rolling over and telling her that I'll obey her demands when you Just doing my own thing behind her back doesn't sit right with me. However, after speaking to my own mother about the subject, he thinks that it would be disrespectful. She says that even though I am paying for my half of the rent, Emily's family is still paying for this apartment and they should be able to have a say on if what goes on, even if Emily and I just end up breaking those rules anyway. I've spoken to Emily about this subject, and she doesn't care if I tell her mom that I will or will not be following those rules as long as I don't indicate that Emily breaks them.

21:20 I think you go in there and you go, Emily, she's going to break them most of all. She has a guy over every night, a different guy.

21:28 Hey, Emily, lay down on the floor for me. All right, here comes a bus.

21:32 Throwing you under it.

21:33 So I was hoping to get some outside opinions here. Reddit, what do you think? Would I be the a-hole if I told my roommate's mom that I won't be following her rules in my apartment? You will be the a-hole if she enters the apartment and the second she enters, you say this?

21:48 Yes.

21:48 Yeah, you go, yeah, she's like, oh, hi, everyone. You go, I will not follow your tyranny.

21:54 Rules are meant to be broken. Your gods do not rule me here. What is a god to a non-believer?

21:59 Edit.

22:00 Thank you all for your input. Her parents stopped in briefly, but then left to go get food. They'll be staying here overnight, though, so I'm planning on updating this later tonight to let everyone know what goes down when we all do sit down and talk. I also just want to say that after talking to Emily further about this, it turns out that her dad doesn't really care what I do and thinks that his wife's demands are extremely unreasonable.

22:20 This is why Emily doesn't care if I speak up about it or not, because I guess that even though her mom is paying the bills, it's her dad who makes the money to support them all.

22:28 So her dad is paying the bills?

22:30 No.

22:31 No, no, no, no. Dad makes the money. The mom writes the bills.

22:35 Yeah, she goes, okay, I signed something. He gave me money and then I signed something. So I get to have a say over everyone that lives in this apartment. Yeah, that's definitely how it works.

22:48 Emily says that her dad would never make her move just because her roommate doesn't follow traditional Christian values. And even though her mom is a bit of a squeaky wheel, her words, not mine, Her dad makes all of the final decisions here.

23:02 Update.

23:03 Well, there you go. You don't have to worry about anything. You just say, hey, I'm with dad here.

23:08 Yeah, I'm on daddy's side.

23:10 And then you look at the mom and go, traditionally, you should be on whatever your husband says. And that's it. Update.

23:16 Thanks again for everyone's input, as well as one of the awards. As of right now, nothing really has happened. They're all in the living room watching movies, and I'm just hanging out in my room. That being said, if Emily's mother does say anything... I'm planning on still addressing it in a respectful way while also making my boundaries clear.

23:34 I'll do another update tomorrow morning after they leave. Day two, so they just left. I don't think she actually said anything.

23:41 You think Emily's mom brought it up?

23:43 No.

23:44 No, I don't think Emily's mom said anything.

23:46 How would you bring up an awkward conversation whenever you're just having fun?

23:50 Like your daughter's 21-year-old roommate. I don't think they're talking to her. I think they were just hoping that Emily would tell them and everyone would be like, of course. Of course we can do that.

24:01 Okay, so her parents just went home. So this will be the final update. As I did expect, her.

24:06 Mom did bring up the rules. Called it.

24:09 But it didn't go in the way that I expected. First, a little bit of background info about Emily's relationship with her mom. They argue about politics a lot. I won't go into specifics, but essentially, Emily is on one end of the political spectrum, and her mom is the exact opposite end. Her mom is also into a lot of conspiracy theories, and this topic causes a lot of arguments between the two.

24:32 Wait, now I know what I want to know. The world's flat. I'll tell you exactly what they are. I can tell you all.

24:38 They're the same ones I keep up with.

24:40 He's like, your roommates are satanic followers. And they're going to drag you down into the pits of hell if you have a boyfriend over.

24:50 I guess the entire time they were together yesterday, Emily and her mom were arguing over politics. This morning I went out of my bedroom. I overheard them arguing about it again. They stopped when they saw me. I sat down and was having a casual discussion with Emily and her parents, and then her mom started saying something about the vaccine.

25:09 Yes!

25:10 Ha ha ha ha!

25:11 They're gonna make you stop having babies.

25:13 Ooh, don't get the vaccine.

25:15 Like, you won't even have to worry about having a boyfriend in the house, because you'll never have a family.

25:19 You'll be unalived by 22.

25:23 Emily just snapped at her mom and told her to not bring up politics again. Emily's mom was quiet for a minute, then she brought up the rules. Emily snapped at her mom again and told her that she already talked to me about it and just to drop it. It wasn't brought up again.

25:36 And then that was that.

25:38 Yeah, it makes sense.

25:39 Dude, Emily's a real one.

25:40 Yeah, Emily said, okay, mom.

25:42 What was the dad doing in all of this?

25:44 Just eating his flapjacks.

25:47 And the mom went, what?

25:48 I bet the mom is just at home looking up all that stuff.

25:52 Probably. She might be like a more traditional family. She, you know, wife stays at home. and does all of the back of house tasks, you know? And she has all this time to just spend on the internet.

26:05 I just want to hear the mom's craziest conspiracy theory, you know?

26:08 We all talked casually about school and work for a little bit, and then they all packed up and left.

26:14 Well, there you go. Now only Emily has problems.

26:17 And then you get the, what is it, the stapler or staples button that says, that was easy.

26:23 Yeah, you should go give her a hug. She had a tough day.

26:28 The mom's a nut job. I have met some people that handle this well and don't handle it well. You're looking at someone that keeps up with these conspiracies, and look how well I'm handling it.

26:36 Look at him. Look at him. He's dead in his eyes.

26:40 And that's the end of this story. We're going to go on to the next one.

26:44 My roommate's boyfriend moved in without asking me, so I want to report them.

26:48 That's not okay.

26:50 Before all of this started, my roommate, 25 female, and I, 22 female, got along really well. similar interests hung out etc over the last couple of months she started bringing her boyfriend 19 male to our room to spend the night it started as a few nights here and there then it progressed to him essentially living here showering eating getting ready in the mornings etc i kind of did that i've done that but like so have all of my boyfriend's roommates so it's fine Mind you, this is a tiny room with only room for two beds, two dressers, and a desk. For a while, I let it slide, as I was often spending time outside the room. My first mistake. And this is a shared room?

27:34 Yeah.

27:34 Which makes this a whole lot worse.

27:37 College dorm, I'm believing.

27:39 Also, okay, I'm not going to say it's like super weird, but 25 and 19? Little weird.

27:45 He's 19, she's 25?

27:45 Yeah. Yeah.

27:47 No, he's got game.

27:48 I guess so. As a 25-year-old, I would never, ever want to date a 19-year-old. As time passed, I got sick of it. I have exams to study for, need sleep. He needs the TV to be on to sleep. And honestly, just needs some dang privacy. I approached her a few weeks back about it, explaining this to her. She caught me off with, okay, fine, you don't need to explain.

28:12 I thought things were fine for a few days. Then she started becoming really passive-aggressive. She threw away some of my food, sat on her bed watching TV while I unpacked a huge fridge in front of her, and brought her boyfriend back to spend the night not even two days after our conversation. So I confront her about this the next day. She blew up at me, telling me that I was a neurotic psycho, a witch, and that if I didn't like it, I should quit. Quit what?

28:36 Quit what?

28:37 Quit living here?

28:38 I'm gonna stop sleeping. I'm gonna quit.

28:41 I tried my best to stay calm, but eventually tell her that if it doesn't stop, I would report her.

28:46 Ooh, no, well, not really.

28:49 By the way, this comes from The Room Throw, and if you want to submit your own stories, go to the r slash showcase story time subreddit. I'm Sophia.

28:55 I'm Keon.

28:55 I'm Riley.

28:56 And we're here to give good advice goofily, but I don't know what's going on anymore. Who is anyone?

29:01 I'm Sophia now.

29:02 Oh, let us know who everyone is in the comments.

29:05 We are Sophia. I am Sophia.

29:08 Sophia. Here's where things get a little complicated. We're all in the military.

29:13 Oh, this makes so much more sense. Thank you for your service.

29:17 Also, age difference makes more sense too. Reporting her for having her boyfriend over and buying booze for him on a regular basis could potentially end or seriously hinder both their careers, especially her boyfriend he was recently under investigation.

29:31 For what?

29:32 So saying this spooks her. My roommate panics and starts texting me after she leaves the room. saying that our superiors wouldn't care.

29:39 Oh!

29:40 Oh, you want to test that?

29:41 Okay. Really?

29:42 Great, I'll tell them right now.

29:43 You know how hard it would be to frame that?

29:45 Yeah.

29:45 Not at all.

29:46 The next day she apologizes and says that it won't happen again. I accept her apology and let it go. For a while, things are good. But as of late, he's been spending more and more time in my room again. I have found two toothbrushes and men's bath soap in my bathroom, hidden away in the back of our cabinet.

30:03 Some people like men's body washes, you know?

30:06 He brought his PS4 to our room and has it hooked up to our shared TV.

30:09 Great, now you have a PS4. Yeah, you got a PS4.

30:11 Yay.

30:13 My roommate has stopped talking to me completely, ignoring my questions or when I try to start a conversation. Her boyfriend is annoying, but is a decent dude and still tries to be friendly to me. I just don't know what the right thing to do here is. Do I just deal with it for the next few months and put myself at risk for being complicit to underage drinking if she gets caught? Do I report them and put them both at risk for ruining their military careers? It was just my roommate. I wouldn't hesitate to report her.

30:46 But her boyfriend is actually a decent person who I think is just lovestruck. And we do have an update. What do you do?

30:53 Can we change the logs?

30:55 Yeah, can we just log them out? Vote them out?

30:57 This is the second time this has happened now? Yeah, where OP's confronted roommate and be like, you gotta stop this. Honestly, I'm gonna be like, hey, I don't need to give you a third chance. What are we doing?

31:08 Yeah, you could either frame him or talk to someone. Framing, if it gets back to you're in a lot of trouble.

31:15 Yeah, I don't know. It does seem as though OP is at least implying that she doesn't see him as often. She just knows that he's there based off of clues. But that could be not true. It just sounds like he's not there as often.

31:32 He doesn't need to be living there, though. Yeah.

31:35 I don't know. The only thing that I'm considering, I'm like, oh, is OP just already upset? And she's finding out clues that he's just there at all?

31:43 There's mold in her room and it's making her aggravated.

31:46 And she's like, no, this mold. I hate the boyfriend. And it's all this mold's fault. Yagaira says, talk to the boyfriend. I mean, he seems like he's more, maybe more receptive.

31:55 She's mature for his age.

31:56 Can she stay at your place more? Does he have a place?

32:00 I mean, presumably if they're in the military, you get like housing.

32:04 Probably got like a bunk.

32:06 He's probably just like has a, he either has like a gross roommate or like a roommate that, or multiple roommates even.

32:12 Boy roommate.

32:14 Update. So yesterday I finally worked up the courage to talk to my superiors about the situation. I left out all the incriminating details and essentially told them that He was over all the time the things she had said to me and that I wanted to move out. They said they would call HQ and have something figured out for me by the end of the day.

32:33 Hey, can we get a drone strike on this guy?

32:36 Can we just get rid of him?

32:37 Can we just get rid of him?

32:38 So I got called back in, and I'm told that they'll be moving my roommate instead of me and switching her out with my neighbor. Now, this is the last thing I wanted as I'm inconveniencing two people.

32:49 I mean, they were inconveniencing you.

32:51 Yeah, I mean, you would probably be inconven- inconveniencing two people regardless of whether or not it was you yeah oh well i guess if she moved then she wouldn't be inconveniencing inconveniencing.

33:02 Her roommate one other person.

33:03 Yeah she would just be swapping out with another person three if you count my roommate's boyfriend i try to talk with my superiors and make sure there were no other options but they tell me no and to not feel bad about the situation my neighbor was completely understanding of the situation and and said that she wished I had said something a long time ago. She's awesome.

33:21 Why don't you live with her?

33:22 Yeah. When I went back to my room after being released, my roommate was there, and oh my god, did she freak out. She starts screaming at me, calling me a witch. Fat. Pathetic. Her boyfriend pipes in occasionally, repeating what she says. He goes, you're a witch!

33:38 Yeah, witch!

33:39 Pathetic! Telling me I had everything handed to me because I had my school paid for. I haven't even been to college. I'd just tell her I could have made the whole situation a lot worse, and I was willing to be the one to move out. I leave it at that and ignore everything else she says to me.

33:54 Rabbit hole.

33:55 Is it drinking, underage drinking, if your girlfriend, you're 19, your girlfriend's 26, your girlfriend puts it in her mouth, swallows a little bit, and then comes over to you and kisses you, and then you get a little bit of it?

34:05 Yeah, like mama bird it?

34:06 Just a little bit at a time.

34:08 Yes, Riley. Dang it.

34:10 Okay, well, there's no loophole for this guy to get out of drinking.

34:14 I normally I'd be like, oh, you know, I think it's good that OP didn't wrap them out for the drinking stuff because it's like, oh, you didn't have to do that. But now I'm like, they kind of suck.

34:25 Might as well.

34:25 I've been seeing a lot of drinks around. He seems kind of wobbly at night.

34:29 You go, oh, I'm a witch. Oh, well, seems like you're doing something illegal.

34:34 Who's providing some little drinkies to the child over there, huh?

34:38 Sounds like that's a little illegal.

34:40 I would.

34:41 Yeah. At that point.

34:42 We finally get her all moved out, and as my neighbor is moving in, we help her clean. It was disgusting. Vomit behind the bed? Sticky brown stuff on the walls, crumbs, and more of the brown stuff in her drawers. It really explains a lot of the smell. We spent two hours doing that, but all is well now. My new roommate is awesome. My old roommate now is stuck with a girl she absolutely hates. who also has a boyfriend who sleeps there, who's a heck of a lot more vocal than me and not afraid to call her out on her BS. My old roommate's boyfriend is constantly glaring at me, but whatever. I don't feel bad for them.

35:17 I feel bad for making my new roommate move, but I'm proud of myself for doing what was best for me for once.

35:22 She didn't want to be there anyways.

35:24 Yeah, they're upset at you for them breaking the rules.

35:27 Yeah, that's so stupid. But now they have to deal with a person who's doing the exact same thing as them.

35:32 Yeah.

35:33 Oh, dude.

35:34 The person that set that up is totally smiling right now.

35:37 I'm a little bit confused because OP is saying, oh, it was really gross. Whose area were they cleaning?

35:42 The roommates. The old roommates.

35:44 Whose old roommate?

35:45 So you have OP and then Brittany. Brittany moved out and Cassie moved in. But as Cassie was moving in, they saw all of Brittany's mess in her corner.

35:53 The one who moved in with Opie's ex-remate?

35:56 Yeah, so Cassie was with Dana.

36:00 Cassie and Dana.

36:01 So Brittany moved in with Dana. And now Cassie moved in. And then they were cleaning up Brittany's mess.

36:05 Yeah, that's gross. That's crazy.

36:07 Too off.

36:08 But that's the end of that story.

36:09 Ew, vomit?

36:11 Yeah, that's like, how do you, I don't know, if I, because you can smell that. NLP said, oh yeah, explains the smell, but like, to a point where I'm, like, I'm, that's a biohazard and I'm calling, if you can call the superiors and they'll move you into a new room, you could have definitely been like, hey, my roommate, there's like a foul smell in my room.

36:30 There's an unknown liquid or sticky liquid all over the place.

36:35 It must have not been that close if you couldn't smell that. Weird, weird, weird, weird.

36:40 And that's the end of this story. We're gonna go on to the next one.

36:44 Hey, it's Carly, your favorite axolotl host here. We're going to get back to the stories, but here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

36:53 I discovered hurtful messages between my boyfriend and his brother talking about me. Uh-oh, that's not good. I, 23 female, will try to make this as short as possible. I'm taking summer courses and my laptop just broke. I asked my boyfriend, Andy, 23 male, to borrow his overnight so I could finish a paper. He gladly said yes. As I was procrastinating with Reddit in one window, the tab at the top started indicating that there was a new Facebook message. Not even realizing that actually Andy was logged into Facebook, I clicked on the tab instantly and realized that, oops, this wasn't mine when I saw the message was from his brother, 27 male-ish.

37:38 I didn't cut and.

37:39 Paste it, but basically the message said, dude, where's the horse teeth at?

37:43 You're up late.

37:45 I have terrible teeth, yes. Not a secret. So obviously this was about me. Putting that in my back pocket, though.

37:53 Take a picture. Yeah, it's not good.

37:56 Oh, man.

37:56 Your own boyfriend and brother talking about your teeth.

37:59 Oh.

38:00 Yeah.

38:00 There are some prominent features on people's faces in my family, and we do name them after that.

38:06 Oh.

38:08 It's bad. Well, that's not good, right?

38:09 Like what? Give us one.

38:10 Let's not.

38:11 I can't do it right here. I did not answer, but my curiosity got the better of me. and I scrolled through their conversation. While there were lots of positive things Andy said about me, she's amazing. She's very fun. I would never cheat on her no matter what. Brother was pitching pretty hard to have Andy hook up with the girl from his work. Lots of compliments about my rock climbing. He also called me things like No F * * * s McGee, Rat's Nest Hair, and Avocado Nose.

38:38 Oh, we got multiple names. Wow.

38:41 What does Avocado Nose mean? Oh, like it's like... Wait, like, ooh?

38:46 Yes.

38:47 Oh, that's so rude.

38:49 I mean.

38:50 It's like the one nose you never pick when making your me on the Wii.

38:57 Yeah.

38:58 He also went through a long conversation sort of at his brother's urging that I am far from the prettiest girl he's ever dated. And sometimes he misses the dumb, big boobed types. He dated in high school.

39:12 What is going on? By the way, this comes from.

39:14 Very Sad Right Now, 1, 2, 3, and a few of us may own stories.

39:18 You know where to go. I'm Riley. I'm Keon.

39:21 And I'm Savannah.

39:22 And we're going to make Very Sad, 123 very happy with our funny jokes and humor. If you have anything you'd like to add, please add it down below. If you saw this from your partner.

39:33 If my partner called me McGee, I'd be pissed.

39:37 I'm a solid A cup.

39:39 Oh, wait.

39:42 Oh, my God.

39:42 Somebody did this to me. My like XXX whatever in high school. Oh, my God. His friends used to call me tree trunks. And you want to know why?

39:51 Because you had big ankles?

39:52 No, ginormous thighs. They used to call me tree trunks because my thighs were huge.

39:57 Okay. Let me say something about women's thighs. It doesn't matter how big they are. They are beautiful. That is like the best part.

40:04 Yeah, honestly.

40:05 How about wings? Like triceps?

40:07 Sure.

40:09 A girl with some triceps?

40:11 Okay. Wings.

40:12 Yeah, that could.

40:13 I could be down.

40:14 She could do some pull-ups and stuff. I was attracted to a girl with tricep once.

40:17 Yeah.

40:18 Ugh. I don't even know. Back to my original question. If you saw your partner talking about you like this, is this an immediate breakup?

40:26 We said a lot of nice things, though.

40:27 Do they outweigh bad?

40:29 I heard three bad things and ten good things. I think they even out.

40:33 So, no, no, no.

40:36 They even out.

40:37 Oh, no.

40:37 You shouldn't be talking bad things in the first place.

40:39 So mic drop.

40:40 Here's the thing. I know I'm not the best looking girl. I wish I was, but I've come to terms with my appearance. Well, at least I really thought I had until last night, but I really love Andy. And it's not like it's first puppy dog love either because I've had boyfriends and been in love before. And this feels very different. I don't know if I should or even could get over this, but I want to because nothing he has said was untrue. I have no chest, my nose is too big for my face, and I spend all my spare time outside, so my hair is most of the time a mess.

41:14 Oh, Pete, no.

41:15 Yeah, don't be looking for reasons to, like, confirm what he's saying.

41:21 He's rude, and he should not be saying any of that.

41:23 You're beautiful. I dated a guy whose friend called me a butterface.

41:28 Oh, yeah, everything butterface. Yeah. I've heard that before.

41:33 I don't think I have been called, not that I know of, but I have heard that term.

41:38 And it was a private conversation I was never supposed to see. But it still hurts that Andy does not see me as even attractive compared to his other girlfriends.

41:47 How do I approach this? Or even should I?

41:50 I know he would feel horrible if he found out I knew about this. I don't want to do that, but I feel like I need to clear the air somehow.

41:58 How should I? I'm confronting. Yeah?

42:01 Yeah.

42:01 Oh, you're going to feel bad about confronting your boyfriend who's not stopping these name callings with his brother? Confronting this. That's crazy. I have to. Yeah, I know. Because you keep thinking about it. Every time you see him or you see his brother.

42:14 Exactly. That's how I feel, too.

42:17 Or start making up names for the brother. Get a little bit more personal. Start using those names that he used for you. And like, what's up, Crow's Nest or whatever.

42:27 McGee.

42:28 Yeah.

42:28 What's up, tree trunks?

42:29 Yeah.

42:30 What's up?

42:31 What's up, guy who's obsessed with his brother's exes?

42:33 Yeah, I mean, this is locker room talk these brothers are doing. I never engage in locker room talk.

42:39 I just.

42:40 As you shouldn't. It's just like.

42:43 I don't know.

42:43 Like, I've been in scenarios where guys are like, oh, yeah, I took this girl and I blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like.

42:48 OK, it's.

42:49 Just it makes me look down on you.

42:51 If you're not going to tell me like then you're not being your true self because you're around your true self around your like man, your friends. But then you can't be your true self around me because you would never say that about me.

43:02 If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it. If you're trying to be your true self, how are you supposed to keep it all in? Yeah, you know who that is? Myself. Update.

43:10 I took most of the advice here and broke up with Andy. Oh, I didn't even think about that option. I thought she was just going to stay with him.

43:18 You mean my hypothetical at the very beginning that I asked?

43:21 I can't even see straight. I'm so brokenhearted and crying so hard. He was very apologetic and he said he didn't mean any of it. But the person who said can't unring a bell is what kept going through my head. I can't even begin to describe how sad I am right now. I always kept my fair distance from guys, keeping school, climbing, I'm a semi-pro outdoor sports climber, and my community garden as a comfortable pad between getting hurt too bad. But I'm smitten with Andy, everything about me, and my self-protective side I turned off because my heart skips a beat when he's around me. I'm crushed. I'm broken over this. I know things will be better in time, but Mein Gott.

44:06 Mein Gott. I'm sick right now. They're German. That's just got to be German. Can you look up German Mein Gott? Oh, yes, I can. Can you look up German?

44:13 Mein Gott means my God or oh my God.

44:17 Mein Gott. Mein Gott. Mein Gott. Mein Gott.

44:22 Wow.

44:23 She's already sad. She's already sad.

44:26 She can't see straight because she's heartbroken and crying. It's hard to type when you can't see.

44:30 Darn.

44:31 You would know that.

44:32 It doesn't help, I will admit. OP, you deserve better, you know? You'll find someone who... Better or the best? Well, OP's the best. And that's the end of this story. We're gonna go on to the next one.

44:46 The man I kissed already had a girlfriend who just gave birth yesterday.

44:50 That's really messed up.

44:51 I was at a festival Friday in my home city and ran into an old friend. We used to be in the same friend group and hung out, but lost touch. I haven't seen him for seven years. I drifted away from that group because most of them were closer to my ex. Friday night, we kissed. Like, really kissed.

45:09 Just like that?

45:10 Just like that.

45:11 No, no, like, oh, we meet up. It was just like... Hey, Kiss.

45:15 Kiss. We went away from the crowd and there was some grabbing. Ooh. And he confessed that he had always been very attracted to me. I went home and didn't think much of it. Like, it was fun and he's good looking, but I didn't really feel super excited about him. I had no plan to do anything more with it. Saturday, I was also at the festival, but I didn't see him. Today, Sunday, I looked him up on Facebook. We're still Facebook friends and I was shocked and to see that he has a girlfriend who had posted that she had given birth yesterday, Saturday, just one day after the kiss. And it's their second child.

45:49 What's he doing out and about?

45:51 Yeah, like, why is he at a festival? Are they divorced? Why is he at a festival? I know her too, as it's the same girl that he was dating back then.

46:00 Ooh.

46:01 He's like, seven years have gone by. She doesn't remember a thing.

46:04 By the way, this comes from Last Puppy in the Box. And if you want to submit your own stories, go to the r slash showcase story time subreddit. I'm Sophia.

46:10 I'm Kion.

46:11 And I'm Savannah. We're here to give good advice goofily, but we don't have all the answers. We only know what we'd do. So let us know what you would do in the comments. And Opie says, I liked her very much. I have gone over it in my head about what to do. I, of course, have zero interest in him. I didn't really before, but after knowing this, I find him absolutely disgusting. I feel disgusted with myself too, but I do blame him more because I had no idea he was still with her. I mean, yeah.

46:37 You're not to blame. You didn't do anything wrong.

46:39 Nothing.

46:40 It Yeah.

46:41 And definitely not that she was about to give birth the next day. After thinking a lot, I have decided not to tell his girlfriend. My reasoning is that she literally just gave birth, they have small children, and I don't want to be the person who drops this on her right now.

46:55 I think that is.

46:57 I get the she just gave birth, let's give her a minute. I probably would message her in like two weeks.

47:04 Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.

47:04 You know, I'd be like, she literally just gave birth.

47:07 I think Opie's going to do that. I think Opie's going to be like, hey, let me just, she just gave birth. Let's just.

47:12 Yeah, I wouldn't tell her right now, but I do think you should tell her.

47:17 You should probably message the guy and be like, hey, what's that about? You just have a new kid. What's that about?

47:24 Yeah, congratulations on your kid. I also do not want to be seen as someone who helped ruin a family, even though I know he is the one who chose to cheat, but I just don't want my name on this. Message her anonymously. In two weeks. Part of me thinks that if he is capable of doing this while his girlfriend was about to have their child, he will probably give her other reasons to reevaluate their relationship later when she has more capacity to deal with it. But I also feel like maybe she deserves to know. And maybe I'm only making excuses to protect my own relationship. And because I don't want to deal with it. Am I the a-hole for not telling this girl that I kissed her boyfriend? And we've got an update. But what do

48:01 you think? I think.

48:03 Put yourself in her shoes.

48:04 Yeah.

48:05 If you're the pregnant girlfriend, wouldn't you want to know?

48:08 Probably not ASAP.

48:09 Rocky?

48:09 Yeah, give me a minute. I still think two weeks.

48:12 I agree. What do you guys.

48:14 Do you think.

48:14 Do you guys.

48:15 think don't tell her at all tell her right now or tell her in like some you know wait after some waiting period.

48:23 Like a month at the most yeah.

48:24 Me personally i would tell her now because i know in like a week or two one i'm either gonna forget about it and two i'm just not i'm gonna talk myself out of it if i.

48:36 Don't yeah she might just convince her oh well now it's been too yeah it's been a while you know.

48:41 Who cares it's been a while.

48:43 It's been a while Um, I see that.

48:46 If he can do that with you. Yeah. Imagine if he could do that with anybody else. Yeah.

48:51 If he's kissing random girl from his past at a festival, he's absolutely cheating on her with other people.

48:57 Well, without, without a doubt. Yeah.

48:59 But we got an update. I can see a lot of people think I should tell her or at least tell her later when she's not freshly postpartum. However, I still don't think I want to do that. Girly pop. Come on.

49:08 Come on.

49:09 O.P.

49:10 Instead, I decided to call my ex for some context. He knew her back then, too, and apparently still does because they played sport together for a while.

49:17 Sport. Sport.

49:19 They played sport together.

49:20 Come here, sport.

49:22 And he still sees both of them. Ooh, maybe he can do the telling. Him and I ended things on good terms, so it wasn't weird to call him. I told him what happened, and he told me there had been a lot of drama in their relationship for years, and that this is not the first time for him. Also, not the worst thing he has done. According to my ex, he has cheated on her multiple times, and not just kissing.

49:45 He even had a full relationship on the side at one point. where he had promised the other girl that he would leave his girlfriend for her, but he never did.

49:53 Oh, wow. I mean, I did call it as I sees it, but wow.

49:55 Why is your ex still friends with these people? We've got a little bit left. Any final thoughts?

50:01 What a s * * *. Yeah, very s * * *. Why are they still together? I don't know. What is going on?

50:08 I don't know why they're still together. It feels like maybe she's... You know, she thinks that she's stuck because she's got two kids now.

50:15 Honestly, good thing you texted your ex to get more context before you did this.

50:21 I still think you should tell her. There is less, I think, pressing need to tell her now that we know this information because she's stayed before, you know, but I still think you should tell her.

50:36 Yeah.

50:37 She knows about some of his cheating, maybe not the full extent of everything, but she knows about the side girl and a few other incidents. My ex said she has taken him back every time and forgiven him. Girl. Yeah, now it's on her. You're just an idiot.

50:52 Yeah, you can just tell her, but if it's happened multiple times, it's not going to do a thing.

50:56 She had two kids with the guy. I don't think she really cares. And also the fact that it's not just one incident. It's been a few. She don't care.

51:04 Her excuse, according to him, is that they met young and it was just a rocky path and that he did choose her in the end. And he's the one she wants to be with for her life.

51:13 Why?

51:13 Although they still haven't gotten married or even engaged. Yeah, I doubt he'll ever marry her. He also said that she might not know he is doing this right now, but she should know his character by now. He also warned me that this guy can become very unpleasant. Probably not dangerous or anything, but definitely unpleasant. So his advice was to just not get involved in this. I know some people will still think I should tell her, and I understand that. I just don't think it's worth it for me. At least now my ex knows, and he does see them sometimes. I don't think he's going to say anything if nothing more happens. But maybe in the future, if the guy decides to cheat again, he will. Then he might bring it up. So you're just leaving alone

51:54 to be someone else's problem.

51:56 Yeah.

51:57 I don't like this.

51:57 This is a gross predicament.

51:59 Kind of like, I don't know, your ex kind of sucks. You suck less for not telling now that we know this context.

52:07 Yeah.

52:07 I still think you should tell, but I understand safety concerns.

52:11 But, like, is it going to... Would it do anything? Will it do a thing? No.

52:17 Probably not.

52:17 Unfortunately not. I don't know. That sounds like just a very, very gross predicament. I'm sorry, OP. I'm more sorry for the girl.

52:26 Yeah.

52:27 But she's also, like, she's staying here. She's staying there. She knows.

52:31 Yeah.

52:32 Truthfully, now it's up to the girl if she wants to make the decision. You can tell her anything, but.

52:37 She wouldn't listen.

52:38 Yeah.

52:38 They got to make the decision for themselves.

52:40 Yeah.

52:40 But that's the end of that story.

52:43 My boyfriend gets upset over inoffensive things that I say. I'm getting tired of it. Girl, I would too. I, 28 female, am presently on a walk trying to blow off steam. You're a choo-choo train. My boyfriend, 28 male, has a habit of getting offended by something I say. Last week, I said, my friend Sam wants to hang out with us soon. He wants to get to know you better. He's a good guy. Because of this, we had a day-long fight about it because he said, I went on and on about how about Sam is a great guy after we had spicy sleep. It had been 20 minutes or so, but we were in bed just talking, and that made me upset. So, LP says, we had a day of fighting where he accused me of not being sensitive enough, and I accused him of reading too

53:23 much into a single sentence. This is not the first time it's happened. We have been dating for eight months, and we were long distance for a while, and had maybe five fights in that time, in the span of six months. That's not healthy. The last two months, we've lived together. I'm in another country, and he came here to live with me. Last night, he was talking about when he goes back to his home country, he'll have to find a place, etc., and doesn't know if he'll find temporary housing. I suggested him getting an apartment and breaking his lease. I've had to do this before, and will do this next year, as a matter of the fact.

53:54 It sucks, but that's how crap works, and we just gotta put up with it. This has turned into another day of us fighting, with him accusing me of taking him for granted. Taking his job flexibility for granted. He can work anywhere. And not caring enough, not being sensitive enough, you name it. OP, you guys have been dating for eight months. Break up. Listen, man, he's hot.

54:16 Come on.

54:17 Don't care. Think about it.

54:18 He's a 10, but he overthinks everything you say.

54:21 Down to a 5. That one sentence apparently had a lot of meaning to him when I was just trying to offer up suggestions. I explained my side, I listened to him, I agreed with him on some points, and I apologized. He continued to go on about how I don't appreciate him. By the way, this comes from user QueenOfAshes.

54:39 And if you want to submit your own stories, go to the r slash OKStoryTime subreddit. I'm Keon.

54:42 I'm Riley.

54:43 And I'm Savannah.

54:45 And we're here to give good advice goofily. We don't know everything. We only know what we'd do. So let us know what you'd do in the comments down below. Pretty please. As Opie says, this is a theme in our fights. I say something wrong. He gets upset. He insults me without calling me a bad girlfriend outright. Gets mad that I get upset. Then says he can't tell me how he feels and how it's always his fault and paints himself the victim. Oh, my head hurts. The fact that you have like a pattern to your arguments and there's a theme to it. It's not even been a year. My head hurts. Opie continues saying, I'm livid.

55:24 I've done so much for him and have been nothing but grateful. He has moved here for me. I've never asked him to. He wanted to. And he wants to come back in a few more months when his tourist visa is up. He's always been the one saying he has the money. His job is flexible. He wants to be here. Now he accuses me of putting pressure on him?

55:42 Because of that one single sentence? I need insight. I need perspective. I need advice. Please help. And that's what we're going to do.

55:52 So when you date a man with high intelligence, sometimes it's hard to connect with him on an intellectual thing. So usually when you say just simple words without precise meaning, it can turn into an argument. Thus, Opie, you're the a-hole. And don't blame me for being so smart. I'm not. I'm not the bad guy here. I'm just a victim to your stupidity.

56:14 This guy is a modern day Socrates. Um, easy. I'll tell you everything you need to do right now, OP. Two words. Break up. Expand your vocabulary. Holy crap, no. Break up. Oh, sorry.

56:26 That was three words.

56:27 Expand your lexicon. That's still three words.

56:30 And what is lexicon? All right.

56:32 Lexicon.

56:33 So lexicon is the library of words that you know.

56:37 Break up.

56:37 Easy break up.

56:39 Maybe do flip the argument and you do that to him.

56:42 I don't know. He takes it. I just need to see a photo of this guy. How hot is he? Update.

56:47 It always comes back to that.

56:49 Update. Well, Reddit, we broke up. No. What? Two weeks after I posted the above, we got into another fight.

56:58 Really?

56:58 Wow. Because I was surprised to see him in the kitchen when I just saw him in the bedroom. I said, oh, you're up. He responded by rolling his eyes. shrugging his shoulders and demanding, is that a problem? Did we hear her tone of voice and how she said it? I don't think we did. I want to throw something at you.

57:19 I said, of course not. I was just surprised. And then he went on to do the laundry. He left the kitchen and went into the bedroom. He gave me one word answers when I tried talking to him. I guess he needed time to himself. So I went to the living room to call my friend. As I was talking to her, I heard him leave the apartment. After I finished talking to her about 20 minutes later, I went out to find him playing Pokemon Go. Dude, you did that today? I did that today, yes. I caught a shiny.

57:45 Ooh, what kind?

57:47 My egg hatched. It was a 10K egg, and it was a shiny Bouffalant. Thanks, Pokemon Go. I tried talking to him like normal, and he kept giving me one-word answers, not looking at me. Of course he's not looking at you. He's trying to get an excellent throw on Pokemon Go. Also, you should have watched your tone earlier. I finally asked him, what was wrong? And he said... Nothing. Oh my God.

58:11 Like, if you're going to call me out, tell me what happened. Like, you have to back it up.

58:17 I said to just tell me. He said he didn't feel welcome in my apartment because of my tone. Oh, Riley Wilson.

58:24 Woman doctor right there.

58:26 For listeners who heard the previous fights, you'll know my tone and the wordings of my sentences were things that triggered him a lot.

58:35 I mean, it did.

58:36 He couldn't talk. He's speechless. Even if they were innocent statements like, I thought you were traveling on Monday. Or anything else that somehow threatened him and made him immediately defensive. Threatened you?

58:46 You think, oh, you're leaving on Monday?

58:49 I cannot let you get close. Oh, you're up in the kitchen. How do you, how's that threat? I feel like you ask him, hey, how's your day?

58:58 Oh my God.

58:59 You're asking me how my day is? How dare you? Don't even look at me.

59:04 As you can see, everything OP asked him, he's looking at it through the perspective of.

59:10 annoyance or he's getting defensive or.

59:13 That like it's he's in survival mode yeah and he's just saying whatever to keep himself afloat and it's it's in it's in here something's Like, some screw's not tightened in there.

59:25 You go, hi. And he goes, oh my gosh. Why do you say hi, not hello? How rude.

59:31 Yeah, hello is a more formal thing.

59:33 Hi is like. It's a good point. Unlike other times where we would launch into a fight that would last hours or days because he would insist I would have a tone. I would say I didn't mean it that way. I would apologize. And it wasn't enough. This time, we managed to pass through it fairly unscathed.

59:52 And.

59:53 Due mostly to my patience, if I may say. But then later that day, he told me how annoying my indecision was. That I could never relax. That night, I wanted to see some friends for a few hours because I had only interacted with him for several weeks at that point, and I needed some social time. He said that was fine. He's always said that would be fine, as if I needed permission from him. So I went out.

1:00:17 25 minutes away from home and nearly at my destination, he messages me about how he feels.

1:00:23 Yeah, he probably does because you're his only friend.

1:00:26 That he's going back to his home country soon. He wishes I hadn't gone out. That we don't have much time left together and we were supposed to spend the whole day together. This was news to me. And how dare you?

1:00:38 You're the a-hole because you should have.

1:00:40 You should have thought about this stuff. Our listeners are going to get triggered by your nonsense. Well, I'm sorry, OP's inconsiderate. It takes a lot of effort for me to keep down the anxiety and just enjoy time with my friends before going home. We argue for two hours about it, even though there are several times when I point out he's repeating himself, that he said he didn't even know he would feel that way, so how could I anticipate his needs? OP, you have to read his mind. Duh.

1:01:10 Like a book. It occurred to me that he often would do that, wait until it was too late to change something, complain about it, and make it my fault. Like when he accused me of leaving him alone to fend for himself at a party for an hour. It was 15 minutes. I was watching the clock knowing he was insecure and didn't like social gatherings. Or that I was with my friend he didn't like the whole time.

1:01:33 I talked to my friend for less than five minutes the whole night because I had one eye on the clock and the other on my boyfriend. Why didn't he get up and talk to me during the party and tell me that? Why did he wait until the party was over and we were home and he held it over my head? Oh, this seems like an isolation tactic.

1:01:50 This is toxic. Or the time we got back from a tropical island and he says, I wish we could have relaxed more.

1:01:57 Oh, oh!

1:02:00 And fun note, I was the one who planned the trip and was driving. And why did it occur to him to tell me that at any time he just wanted to relax somewhere else? I thought it was relaxing because he was just in the car talking with me and playing Pokemon Go anyway while I was doing the driving. Was it really not that relaxing? Or that time he was mad at me all day because he thought I was mad at him and I had made some remark that he took personally. Shock. And he didn't tell me why he was being quiet until hours later and after I pried and begged him for him to just tell me what was going on. You've been doing this for how many months? Eight months? Nine months?

1:02:37 Every day you spend with this man, a little piece of your sanity goes away.

1:02:41 Again, I need to see how hot he is.

1:02:43 No, this is like, truthfully... I went through this. So like, I completely understand. And it's like kind of triggering because it's like, what else can I possibly do? Like nothing, nothing can satisfy this person. No matter if I talk, I say the wrong thing. I don't talk.

1:02:58 It's wrong. You should have said something like, I don't breathe the right way. Why are you breathing like that? Oh my God. I don't know what you want. I literally, and I went insane.

1:03:08 This is the kind of crap. All the time, you guys. Holy crap.

1:03:13 Yeah.

1:03:13 The day of the reckoning. He finally leaves my country. He's back in his home country. It mentions to me how he feels like he failed us and doesn't want to be home. I respond compassionately, but say he needs to get rest because he's been traveling so long and hasn't eaten. And I wanted to give the discussion of his feelings the time and love they needed. And we couldn't when it was 3 a.m.

1:03:34 There.

1:03:34 And he had to be up for work at 7 a.m. Oh no, he's going to take that and be really upset. You told him how to feel.

1:03:41 I don't get why guys get like this.

1:03:44 I'm going to blame it on upbringing.

1:03:45 He goes cold. He goes to bed, he wakes up, and he's still cold. One word answers, uh-oh. It's repeating itself. I'm used to it now. But now, I'm just fed up. I call him out on his behavior. I tell him I'm sick of him going hot and cold with me. He says I didn't comfort him the way he wanted me to.

1:04:07 Of course, it's your fault.

1:04:09 Yeah, well, honestly, it's your fault, dude, because you didn't write me out of SOP with how to respond to you.

1:04:15 I just say I'm no longer comforting you. If I can't comfort you anymore, no one can. Bye.

1:04:21 When have you ever comforted me?

1:04:23 Obi continues saying I reiterate what I had said. He reiterates that it's not what he wanted to hear. Well, we break up later that day. Yeah, we're both sad. Despite the bad times, we did have good times, too. Otherwise, it would have been easier to let go. I'm disappointed in myself for saying I still didn't recognize the emotional mistreatment.

1:04:44 I said we could try again. He says we couldn't. We both cry and we both apologize. We both thank each other for the good times. And now to the next morning. Wait, can I guess? Sure.

1:04:56 He's going to be mean. He's going to be like, actually, this is all your fault. And then and then and then and then.

1:05:01 No, I guarantee he's going to play the victim card. He's going to be like, it's my fault. And you know what? I could have done better. We'll see. Riley, any ideas? He's going to try and win you back. So, next morning, he wakes up.

1:05:14 Pissed.

1:05:15 Told you. Told you.

1:05:16 Oh no, he pee-peed the bed.

1:05:17 Oh.

1:05:18 Told you.

1:05:19 He's mad I didn't give him a chance.

1:05:21 Yep.

1:05:22 Mad he has nothing to show for our relationship. Mad at all the sacrifices he made. Side note, after the last fight I posted about... He had said this to me. I look at all the sacrifices I've made and I wonder, what have you sacrificed? Are you worth it? That's to give you an idea. That is the most hurtful thing anyone has ever said to me. And it was the beginning of the end of our relationship. I opened up my home to him. Cooked him vegetarian meals. Tried to introduce him to other people so he didn't feel lonely.

1:05:50 Took him out and explored the country with him. Tried to cheer him up. Planned all of our trips. It was never enough. What was I sacrificing? My time. My energy. My mental health. My personal freedom. My social time with my friends. I sacrificed everything. Yep, I.

1:06:11 I know this type of guy. I got everything I need to know about him.

1:06:14 Yikes.

1:06:15 I know this man. I know this man.

1:06:19 I don't know. As a dude, it's your responsibility to go out there and make friends and connect with people.

1:06:25 Your girlfriend can help. I will say this. Yeah, a lot of people are introverts, but I've never had any problems making friends with guys. I would say 90% of the time. The other 10% of the time, they don't like me for whatever reason or they don't want to talk to me or have the energy. But when I met Riley, he was one of those guys. 90% or 10%?

1:06:44 Do you remember? I think it was 90%. You were in the 90%. It's very easy. Keone's so cool. Oh, my God. It's very easy to make friends with guys. It's just like, hey, one thing you guys can have the same mutual interest on, boom.

1:06:58 You're good.

1:06:59 You're so good.

1:07:00 Wish that was easy for my ex. He had friends, and then I came into the picture. They were mean to me one day, and so he cut them off. I didn't even say anything. I was like, okay, if that's what you think, like, you know, whatever. Cut them off and then blame me later that he didn't have any friends because of me.

1:07:12 And I went, okay.

1:07:13 All right.

1:07:15 You're right. It was me. I forgot. I ruined your life. But you're still with me, right? Apparently I do something you like.

1:07:21 It was like he always expected the worst of me and would only ever see what he wanted to see. A little bit left here. OP, you know this is not good for you. The fact that you wake up every day or like every little thing could give you a headache because he's just going to start saying you weren't enough or you didn't do this or how dare you talk to me in that tone. It's exhausting. How are you not exhausted by now?

1:07:46 She is.

1:07:46 It took her nine months, eight months. She's breaking up with him.

1:07:49 Goodness gracious. I can only imagine how light you feel being done with this guy.

1:07:54 Yeah.

1:07:56 I remember when I broke up with my ex, dude. Two weeks after, I was like, wow, I'm like, ooh.

1:08:01 No weight on my shoulders.

1:08:02 Wow.

1:08:02 I don't feel stressed. What is that? All the expectations are gone. I don't have anxiety anymore, yeah.

1:08:07 So nice.

1:08:08 I can breathe. I can breathe again.

1:08:10 Exactly.

1:08:10 I'm not doing anything wrong for a day?

1:08:12 That's weird. Crazy. There's a little bit left. Let's go ahead and finish it up. So, we haven't talked since. And after he chewed me up and spit me out and accused me of never listening to his feelings and always blaming him for everything. That I should have told him how I felt sooner. That I should have heard him out and on an apology that He apparently had no intention to actually get better from, just to feel bad that it happened at all and repeat the same behaviors as an infinitum. I won't lie, I miss who he was in the beginning. The sweet guy. The promises.

1:08:44 The love. The care. The above and beyond romantic gestures. But they, they vanished only months into the relationship, after we exchanged a I love you's, and that's when the jealousy came out. The insecurity, nitpicking what I said and how I said it, even how I apologized. wasn't good enough for him his controlling tendencies he demanded i not talk to my friends about it even after the breakup he asked that i not talk to our mutual friends about our breakup i could never make him happy.

1:09:12 That's crazy is this kind of my act word for word huh yeah it's weird thanks He.

1:09:18 Got mad when I would talk about him to anyone.

1:09:21 And I'm like, well, I don't know. I need advice on what to do because I can't come to you because you're crazy.

1:09:26 Yikes.

1:09:26 And then he'd be like, stop telling your sisters because then they look at me bad. Well, don't do bad things.

1:09:30 I don't know. Of course I want to tell my sisters.

1:09:32 Are you an idiot?

1:09:32 All right.

1:09:32 All right. All right.

1:09:34 I'm glad we're done with this episode. Dang, that was just so much trauma.

1:09:38 Yeah.

1:09:38 Yeah.

1:09:38 That's crazy. I was just reading that story. I don't know what's going on there.

1:09:41 It was just one thing after another and another and another. I'm really sorry about that. You were... In that Savannah, but I'm really happy you're out of it.

1:09:49 Look at you now. And that's the end of this story. We're good to go on to the next one.

1:09:59 Hey, it's Angie, your favorite fashion host here.

1:10:02 We're going to get back to the stories, but here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

1:10:07 My girlfriend wants to pay for an expensive vacation for the both of us. I'm uncomfortable.

1:10:12 What's uncomfortable about money?

1:10:15 Some relevant background information. I, 29 male, make a very good living myself and earn slightly over six figures and come from a basic middle class family. Dang. That's what we're calling it now? Yeah, what?

1:10:28 I make six figures and come from middle class.

1:10:31 Okay.

1:10:32 Maybe he came from a middle class family and then got a good job.

1:10:35 And then made six figures.

1:10:37 I live a comfortable life and manage my money wisely. My girlfriend, 25 female, of eight months, comes from a very rich family like... The 1% rich. Dang. Salary-wise, she makes less than half of what I make, but receives an allowance from her family's business every month. She doesn't even touch her salary and says that it gets accumulated into her savings account. She lives off of her monthly allowance from her family business. Relationship-wise, we are very compatible so far. I really like her and she likes me.

1:11:08 I would hope you figured that out eight months in.

1:11:10 Yeah, for real. What was that?

1:11:12 She told me about her family's wealth about four months into the relationship when she felt safe and comfortable with me. Up until now, we split all our expenses and dates 50-50. Recently, we talked about going on a vacation and we decided on Western Europe since I've never been there and I think vacations are a good test of relationships and help move the relationship forward. I can afford the trip on my own if we go the normal route where we book economy tickets to fly and look for an Airbnb or hotel deals, you know. That stuff.

1:11:42 That's the cheap way of... That's how I do it. What do you mean? What's the.

1:11:47 Well, wait.

1:11:48 No, he said the normal way.

1:11:49 Sorry.

1:11:50 I put cheap in his mouth. It's normal.

1:11:52 My bad. That's normal.

1:11:53 That is the normal way to do it.

1:11:55 She wants to fly first class and stay in four to five star hotels.

1:11:58 Ooh, I mean, she can afford it, so why not?

1:12:00 Does Opie want to do that? Opie probably can afford it too, but he wants to go the normal route.

1:12:05 Does he want to go the normal route? Or he just said, like, this would be the normal route. But she wants to do this.

1:12:10 He said, I can afford the trip on my own if we go the normal route.

1:12:14 Mmm, okay.

1:12:15 Alright, we're starting off a little different taste here. One wants to go the normal route, one wants to go the pricier route. By the way, this comes from user VacationWows99. If you want to submit your own stories... Go to the r slash OKStoryTime subreddit, I'm Keon, and I'm Savannah, and we are just goofy people. We only know goofy things, and so that's what we're going to tell you, goofy things.

1:12:37 Let us know what you'd do in the comments down below, and we might appreciate it more than you know. As Opie says, the differences in the rates between Airbnb and lower-end hotels versus four- to five-star hotels is staggering, to say the least, without even getting into the airfare. I told her that I simply could not afford that and she offered to pay for me. She said I could pay her what I would have spent on an economy class airfare ticket plus hotels in my range and she will simply pay the difference. This makes me uncomfortable. As generous as her offer is, I don't think I'm at the stage of my relationship where I can accept such a huge gift from someone. The difference according to my calculations will be over 3k and could be as much

1:13:17 as 5k once we actually book. That's simply too much for me to accept. I want to politely decline her offer and see if we can work out a compromise. And we have an update. Savannah, we are at a standstill here. I get it. When people buy me things, especially very expensive things, like reasonably priced, really appreciate. But it's like a fancy dinner or like fancy thing that I'm like, why did you do that? And they say, I want to treat you or like you deserve it.

1:13:45 Or like, I love you. And I'm like, it makes me a little uncomfortable.

1:13:49 Yeah, it's not when people do that for me. I don't I wouldn't say I get like uncomfortable.

1:13:56 But I would say not uncomfortable, but more so like it makes me feel bad.

1:14:01 I'm like, you don't have to feel.

1:14:02 Like I owe you something or like you had to hold this over my head. And maybe that's how I was raised. Oh, yeah. No, I don't.

1:14:08 I don't think that I don't think they're going to come back and be like, by the way, you owe me this. I think that I'm just like, oh, my gosh, like they do not need to do that.

1:14:16 That's very kind of you. But like.

1:14:18 I don't want to put you at, you know, in a bad position, but obviously she has like generational wealth.

1:14:24 This girl.

1:14:24 So this is doing nothing. It's not even causing it.

1:14:27 This is her breathing air.

1:14:29 Yeah.

1:14:29 So yeah, this is barely the tip of the iceberg for her. Again, family is 0.1%. This is how she does things when she travels. I bet where it's, you know, the lavish hotels, the top tier resorts, everything is first class.

1:14:43 I would not be mad at that lifestyle.

1:14:45 I don't think anyone would be mad at that lifestyle, especially if you're not paying for it. OP's uncomfortable. Maybe talk to her about it. But if that's what she wants to do and she's okay with doing that and says, I want to give you this gift and pay this difference, what have you, if that makes you more comfortable, I say go with it, OP.

1:15:03 Or, like, if you really want to, like, split the cost or whatever, one of you can buy, you know, the airline tickets and then the other one could buy the hotel or something. Or, like, if she buys all of it, you pay for all the meals or something.

1:15:14 You know, like, you can try to find, like, a compromise.

1:15:17 I don't know. What I've got from 0.1% is everything is top tier for the most part. And I know they split 50-50 on everything else, but... This is a vacation. Maybe she wants to do a luxury vacation. Maybe you guys can try and find a compromise, but let her know how you feel. And if she doesn't agree to it, maybe just enjoy the ride?

1:15:39 Yeah, I feel like this is a nice problem to have, truthfully.

1:15:44 I wish I had this problem. But I don't know. I feel like it's not going to... I think you need to go on the vacation and see how things work out. You're not going to know until you actually do it.

1:15:54 It's an ultimate test. Let's find out what happens. We have an update. So, before posting my last post, I had already decided that I was going to turn her down.

1:16:02 Okay.

1:16:04 And I wanted to get advice on how to politely turn her down. After listening to the good people of this sub, I opened my mind a little and decided to have a talk with her about our relationship. And this is including her money and our finances moving forward with an open mind. She came over last night after work and we talked about her proposal. I told her I was incredibly thankful for her offer and But in all honesty, it did make me uncomfortable. I explained to her that it was because of my middle class background and the fact that I'm not a big gift receiver in general. She cut me off right then and there and said she was sorry if she made me feel uncomfortable and she was only coming from a good place.

1:16:38 She revealed to me that growing up even she had feelings similar to mine because she viewed everything as her family's money. And only after she matured later on in life did she start to feel bad about her wealth and privilege. and simply started enjoying it for what it is. She told me she has a standing offer from her father to work a cushy job in the family business, but she still doesn't understand the value of money, and that's why she still works on her own. We then talked about her family's wealth, and the impact it had on her past relationships. She told me that usually she's never offered to do something this big for anyone else, but she only offered this because she really trusts me.

1:17:14 She respects me, and has fallen for me hard.

1:17:18 Oh....

1:17:20 I don't see an issue here.

1:17:22 It sounds like everything, you know, you guys kind of have this understanding of each other even before all of the money and everything. And now you're just trying to navigate to see if the other person feels the same way about how you feel. And I think, truthfully, you do. You guys both feel the same way.

1:17:41 You both.

1:17:42 you know, like you, you have enough to live and you have enough to spend wisely and to, you know, spend on stuff that you just want, not a necessity, you know? So if that's what she wants to do, that's what she wants to do. But she also, I, I love, I love how she was also very understanding of you and how you.

1:18:03 Explained all of it.

1:18:04 I agree.

1:18:04 I think you want to live a simple life or not so luxurious life and I think that you're both on the same page. I think, again, you guys aren't even a year in a relationship. She's trying to see where you are and how you feel about that. And I think we're getting an idea of why she wanted to buy you these things, because she's going to bring up her past relationships.

1:18:26 That's what I was thinking, too.

1:18:27 She probably has had people use her just solely for her money in the past, and so she was making sure that wasn't, like, the deal here.

1:18:34 And obviously, this wasn't on a test. Yeah, no. So, on to Opie's girlfriend. saying she mentioned that in her last relationship she kept everything 50-50 because she wasn't sure about the guy and their relationship got very toxic by the end because he's simply expected her to pay for everything.

1:18:52 And there it is.

1:18:53 She said she loves my ambition and wants me to keep progressing in my career. And I think you guys are good. I think you guys are navigating this fine. You had a A hard boundary, not even a boundary. You're just like, I don't like that. You don't have to pay for all of this. Let's see if we can figure this out together. And she accepted that.

1:19:12 Yeah, you guys found fairness in all of it, which is honestly very, very surprising, truthfully, with how maybe like you guys.

1:19:21 Well, I know OP works. was growing up.

1:19:23 That way, but it, yeah, it's just, you know, everyone just kind of assumes like if you have money, you're kind of above everyone else.

1:19:30 Like your nose is above everyone and whatever.

1:19:33 Your high maintenance or something like that.

1:19:35 Yeah.

1:19:35 Or like you're looking down on people, but that's not the case. Some people just are more successful than others. And that, you know, and not even in that sense, they just have, you know, more money than others, but it doesn't make you a bad person.

1:19:46 Yeah. I, like I said, I was the same way, middle-class family. But I had very wealthy friends who were like, let me buy you this or like, I'll get this for you. And I'm like, you don't have to buy my friendship. They're like, no, it's not buying your friendship. I just like you and I want to do this for you. And I'm like, sometimes I'm like, I'm a little uncomfortable. Other times I'm like, are you sure?

1:20:04 And they're like, yeah.

1:20:05 So it's a gift. But I think you have a good communication with your partner. You guys should be fine. Let's go ahead and finish up the story. Opie says, all that being said, I asked her what it would mean for our relationship going forward if I accepted. We both decided that nothing changes. We keep on splitting it 50-50, as we have so far. She joked that she wouldn't let me off the hook for future dates and expenses this easily, lol. For any future trips or activities, we decided that we won't always go for the most expensive options or the most budget-friendly ones and try to find more of a middle ground. Ultimately, she insisted that because she had already made the offer I had to accept.

1:20:42 I did with the compromise being that once we are there, we are going to split everything else 50-50. And she will let me treat her a few times. And we won't be splurging the way she is used to on past vacations. I'm really thankful that this happened and we both feel closer than ever. She will be coming over on Friday to spend the weekend with me and plan and book this trip. I couldn't be any happier right now.

1:21:03 Aw, yay!

1:21:04 Cute.

1:21:05 Great. Enjoy your Western European trip. I hope Spain, Italy, Portugal, France... Yes. are all very fun.

1:21:16 I'm jealous, but you guys seem like you're doing well. And honestly, it wasn't even like it was a disagreement.

1:21:22 You guys just... You worked through.

1:21:25 They have different views.

1:21:26 How you feel.

1:21:27 Yeah. They grew up very differently, and they're meeting in middle ground. And that's what you're supposed to do. They communicated. They accepted. They figured it out. They threw some, you know, not harsh insults at each other, but like a little cute jabs. Like, OK, yeah, you have to accept this, but you can treat me when we're there. How about that?

1:21:45 Does that make you feel good? Cute. Love it. Amazing.

1:21:48 It was a nice little compromise at the end. We love to see it.

1:21:52 And that's the end of this story.